The Catholic Sobriety Podcast

EP 117: Why Saying No to Alcohol feels Impossible but is Easier than You Think

Christie Walker | The Catholic Sobriety Coach Episode 117

Discover the hidden truths about alcohol's grip on women and why it's not just about sheer willpower. Join me, Christi Walker, as we unravel the societal myths that paint alcohol as a universal remedy for stress and celebration. 

Learn about the biological cycles that keep you reaching for that next drink and how understanding the fleeting nature of alcohol's dopamine boost could be the key to breaking free. Hear how alcohol disrupts not only sleep and metabolism but also poses serious health risks. Together, we'll explore pathways to hope and liberation from alcohol dependency.

Transform your journey to alcohol freedom by turning excuses into growth opportunities. Feel the freedom of a clearer mind and more energy as you deepen connections with loved ones. You're not alone on this path, and I'm here to support and guide you every step of the way. Don’t forget to share this message and help others find the strength they might be seeking.

Drop us a Question or Comment

Join me in the FIRE50 Challenge, a FREE 50-day spiritual journey focused on deepening your connection with the Holy Spirit. You'll explore daily practices, discover our unique charisms, and grow in community with others seeking God's presence in their lives.

This is your chance to awaken new possibilities, and experience the transforming power of the Holy Spirit. 

Join TODAY

I'm here for you. I'm praying for you. You are NOT alone!

Please subscribe to this podcast so you won't miss a thing!

🔥 JOIN the FREE FIRE 50 Challenge - bit.ly/4jNqoJM



👉🏻 JOIN THE FREE 5-DAY KICK START
https://the-catholic-sobriety-coach.myflodesk.com/5-day-sobriety-kick-start

👉🏻 Join The Sacred Sobriety Lab
https://sacredsobrietylab.com


Visit my Website: https://thecatholicsobrietycoach.com

Telos Art Get 10% off Using Coupon Code CHRISTIE10
https://telosartshop.com/?ref=christie

Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the go-to resource for women seeking to have a deeper understanding of the role alcohol plays in their lives, women who are looking to drink less or not at all for any reason. I am your host, christi Walker. I'm a wife, mom and a joy-filled Catholic, and I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach, and I am so glad you're here. Welcome, welcome, friends. Today we are going to talk about why saying no to alcohol can feel impossible and why it's so much easier than you think. If you have struggled to say no to a nightly glass of wine or after-work drinks, you're not alone, and this episode is for you, because we are going to dig into what makes alcohol feel so hard to reduce or eliminate, and why it's not about willpower and here's the exciting part why breaking free might actually be easier than you think. So if that sounds good, stick around, because there is so much hope and freedom waiting for you in this episode. Hope and freedom waiting for you in this episode. Now, how many times have you told yourself I swear, I'm cutting back tomorrow, I'm never drinking again, I'll only drink on XYZ occasions, only to find yourself with a drink in your hand by the end of the day. Maybe you are like a lot of us and you are telling yourself I just don't have the willpower, I cannot get it, there is something wrong with me, I am failing. I hear this all the time and I want to stop you right there, because you are not weak and you are not failing. You are learning, you're human and, most importantly, you are not alone. You can get this. But right now, you're probably most likely thinking with a very limited mindset. Thinking with a very limited mindset, and here's the truth that no one actually talks about it has nothing to do with willpower. Willpower is useless and it's not about being strong enough to get through it. It's a lot about what alcohol actually does to your body and your mind. This is science, folks. There's a biological and emotional cycle at work here, a cycle that is powerful, but, my friend, it is not unbreakable.

Speaker 1:

Now, when you reach for a drink, it's not just about the act itself. Yes, it is a habit. It's a habit that you've formed, a well-worn habit path, but it's also about what alcohol promises you. It promises relief, connection, celebration. We have romanticized alcohol in our society. We have romanticized alcohol in our society and our world to the point where it feels like a solution to everything. Had a long day, wine Celebrating Champagne, want to connect with friends, there's happy hour. But here's another thing that no one tells you what alcohol actually offers is fleeting, and it's often a smokescreen for what is really going on, because underneath that initial buzz, alcohol starts working against you. Okay, let's get a little science geeky here.

Speaker 1:

Now, when you drink, your brain actually releases dopamine. Dopamine has gotten a lot of press lately and I'm sure that you know that it produces those feel-good chemicals that make you feel relaxed and happy in the moment. So what's the problem with that? Well, the problem is that happy is short-lived. It's kind of like when you get a sugar rush and then you crash. So once the dopamine drops, your brain starts craving more to get back that high.

Speaker 1:

The more often you drink, the more your brain recalibrates itself to expect alcohol, just so that you can feel normal again. This is biology, not weakness. But it's not just your brain, because alcohol actually messes with your entire body. It affects your hormones, disrupts your sleep and slows down your metabolism. So all those weight loss efforts that you are doing, it's just working against you. That glass of wine that you have before bed might feel relaxing, but it's actually preventing you from getting the deep, restorative sleep your body desperately needs. Don't believe me.

Speaker 1:

If you have a sleep tracker, I encourage you to track your sleep on those nights when you drink or if you've had a string of nights that you've had alcohol every night. It doesn't have to be like super over drinking, it could just be like one glass and then when you get a day or two or three or maybe even a week of sleep without having alcohol, just compare your sleep on those days and you'll see just how much alcohol is affecting your sleep. So no wonder you wake up tired or burned out the next day. And let's not forget your metabolism. Alcohol slows it down while spiking your blood sugar and leaving you feeling jittery one moment and completely drained the next. It's a total roller coaster and your body is along for the ride. Not to mention, let's say, you go out for a nice steak dinner and you have a couple of glasses of wine with it. Your body is going to work ferociously to metabolize that alcohol before it even touches that steak, that mashed potato or baked potato and sour cream and all of the other things and maybe dessert. All of that's on the back burner until the alcohol is metabolized, so that really adversely affects your metabolism and your weight. Now this is where it gets really real.

Speaker 1:

Beyond those day-to-day physical effects, alcohol is actually putting you at risk for some serious health conditions Before we even get to that. If you have any thoughts of how alcohol might be helping your health, I suggest you go check out episode 98, is your Glass of Red Wine a Health Hero or Hype? I provide some very enlightening information in that episode that you might find helpful or maybe you don't want to know about at all. But when I'm talking about serious health conditions, I'm talking about things like liver disease, high blood pressure, heart problems, not to mention digestive issues. And here's another thing Did you know that alcohol is strongly linked to an increase in seven types of cancer? I said seven, and that includes breast cancer, liver cancer and colon cancer. We don't often talk about these risks because we've been programmed to romanticize alcohol. Society sells us this idea that alcohol is glamorous. It's a reward we deserve.

Speaker 1:

I was just out to dinner with my family at a restaurant, a Mexican restaurant Delicious. We love this place and I usually go there for lunch. So when we went there for an evening dinner with my family, I was in shock. I mean, I shouldn't have been in shock it's called Margarita Factory but I still was kind of in shock at how was in shock at how over the top these drinks were. I mean, my sons, thankfully.

Speaker 1:

We've had lots of talks about alcohol and what it can do to your body and all of that. But there was drink after drink with, like they had strobing lights frozen in ice cubes in these drinks. They looked super fun, super beautiful. This one lady got a martini, a blue martini, delivered to her in a Tiffany box, like a Tiffany styled box that you like. Open up and there's the martini and it was just crazy. This was glamorizing the alcohol. It looked beautiful, but the reality is it's so bad for us and we just don't think about it and people just don't want to talk about it.

Speaker 1:

It's a very, very touchy subject. I know this from experience because of the work that I do but people do not want to talk about it. They don't want to think about it. And I'm so glad that you're listening to this podcast because you're educating yourself. I'm not saying that you can never drink alcohol or should never drink alcohol. I'm not telling you never to drink alcohol. But I heard Dr Andrew Huberman say know what you're doing, just know what you're doing. Be aware, have all the facts, and that's what I try to do with the work that I do and this podcast. Okay, enough about that.

Speaker 1:

Let's talk about why breaking free is probably so much easier than you think. If all of this sounds overwhelming, I want to share some awesome news with you. Breaking free from alcohol might feel impossible, yes, but it's not, and here's why it starts with understanding. When you know what is happening in your body, you can start to work with it rather than fighting against it. You also don't have to do it all at once. Forget the idea that change requires you to have this gigantic goal and get it figured out all at once. All it actually takes is one simple step, one direction, one shift and then another and then another, and, before you know it, those small steps add up and you are creating a life filled with freedom, instead of cycles, instead of being attached to that habit, to the alcohol, going back to it time and time again, despite what you want or don't want.

Speaker 1:

The other thing I want you to do is shift your perspective on your excuses. Yes, excuses can feel super powerful and most excuses are rooted in fear the fears like I'm too stressed to quit right now, or I've tried before and it didn't work. But if those excuses were actually signs of the areas in your life that really need the attention, signs of the areas in your life that really need the attention the most, healing Really look at them, get curious and see them as opportunities to grow. Acknowledge your fears, but do not give them power. Your excuses are valid in the moment, but if you want true freedom, it's going to require moving through the discomfort, and the good news is you have exactly what it takes to do that. By virtue of your baptism, you are equipped with some amazing supernatural superpowers. Go back and listen to my last episode If you want to learn more about that.

Speaker 1:

I talked with Jill Simons from Many Parts Ministries about unlocking the power of charisms for a purpose-driven life. We talked about charisms, gifts of the Holy Spirit and the fruits of the Spirit that come from using those gifts. So if you want more peace, if you want more patience, if you want more joy, then use those gifts. You can use them as you are working toward alcohol freedom from disentangling yourself from the grip that alcohol has on you so that you can take it or leave it with peace. So we want to shift our mindset. You want to start thinking instead of I have no willpower, think I am building my sober muscles, I am working towards something.

Speaker 1:

If you're thinking I have no willpower, I'm never going to get it, you're going to feel defeated. And when you feel defeated, you are going to take an action of just giving in and drinking, and then you're going to get a result that you don't want. That result is going to be increased anxiety, poor sleep, all of those things we mentioned. But if you can take that thought and change it and say, hey, that's just an excuse, what can I do? What can I think to have an emotion that is going to move me to action, to get the result that I want. What does that need to be? That thought needs to be I'm building my sober muscles. Then you're going to feel encouraged, you're going to feel equipped, you're going to know that you can get there, you will feel hopeful, and then your action may be an inaction of not drinking, of choosing not to drink, or your action may be doing something else in its place, which I strongly suggest, when you remove alcohol from the equation, put something else back into that time. Is that increased reading, journaling, walking? Do you have a sparkling water with a twist of lime in it? Just changing that mind shift is going to help you so so much and make things much, much easier, because you will have confidence in your ability.

Speaker 1:

So what's it going to look like? What is a life that is not controlled by alcohol look like? What does it look like when you do not have that chaos anymore that alcohol is causing? You're going to wake up with energy instead of grogginess. Your head is going to be clear. Your body is going to feel better. It's going to be a lot more pleasurable to move, and then you're going to feel hopeful. You're going to feel ready to take on the day.

Speaker 1:

The other amazing, wonderful thing that will happen is your hormones are going to stabilize. So if you are perimenopausal, like me, you may notice that your perimenopausal symptoms increase like hot flashes, poor sleep. All of those things increase when you drink alcohol, but when you don't drink it, your hormones are going to stabilize, your sleep is going to be better and your metabolism is going to work the way it is supposed to. You will no longer feel like you are at war with your own body, and that is going to feel amazing, my friend. But it's more important than just health, because, without alcohol in the picture, your relationships deepen, because you are fully present, you are living fully alive. You may find that you are more patient and you are able to truly connect with the people that you love. You may be more motivated to do things than you do when you are tied to alcohol.

Speaker 1:

When you have to think, oh, I want to go to this restaurant because I know it has my favorite drink, you're liberated from that. And then, of course, there's the time you gain. You really don't realize how much time is wasted on alcohol, not just the drinking it, but the preparing and the planning and the thinking of it. How are you going to get it? When are you going to get it? What are you going to have? Do you need to hide it because you don't want somebody to know you're drinking? Do you need to hide how much you've drank? Do you need to take those bottles to the gas station and put them in that garbage can so that your spouse doesn't know just how much you're consuming? You are going to have time to pursue new hobbies, or maybe there's something that you've always wanted to do or volunteer for, or people that you wanted to work with, or maybe you'll simply enjoy the little moments that you were too distracted to notice before your life expands in ways that you didn't even realize were possible, and that's the beauty of it. You are not just giving up alcohol. So often we think about what we're giving up. Often we think about what we're giving up, but I promise you you will gain so much more.

Speaker 1:

All right, so you're probably wondering that all sounds great, christy, but where do I even start? I'm going to give you a few practical steps that are going to help you get started. You can start this today, and definitely this week. So the first is to hydrate. Like you mean it, alcohol dehydrates your body, which makes those cravings even worse. So I know I know we hear this over and over again drink water, drink water, drink water. I drink water constantly. I would also add to have electrolytes as well. That will help your body absorb the water that you are drinking and keep you more hydrated. So keep a bottle of water with you throughout the day, have electrolytes one or two times a day and whenever you feel like reaching for a drink, just try hydrating first to see how you feel.

Speaker 1:

I always recommend, when you're in the moment and you feel that urge, come on, you're feeling that craving, to check in with yourself and say what do I really need? Because you really don't need alcohol, I promise you. Yes, your brain is going to tell you you need alcohol, but I promise you you do not need alcohol, but you do need something. What is it? Are you hungry? Are you angry? Are you lonely? Are you tired? Are you bored? Are you overstimulated? Do you need some peace? Think about those things and that is going to help immensely.

Speaker 1:

Also, balance your meals, because stabilizing your blood sugar is a huge game changer. So choose meals with a balance of protein, healthy fats, fiber Think a hearty salad with grilled chicken or grilled steak, roasted vegetables with avocado. Gut health is super important and really really helps with cravings as well. So eating that sauerkraut I used to hate sauerkraut, but I really love fermented foods now. So I highly recommend having those things or taking a probiotic or prebiotic. These are going to help so much. Another thing that helps stabilize your blood sugar is, after you eat a meal, going for a 10 minute walk or doing 10 to 30 squats. This is really, really helpful. It's going to help with your metabolism and it'll just help reduce those alcohol cravings.

Speaker 1:

The other thing you can do is to start a new ritual. This is essential, actually. So if you associate evenings with drinking, swap it out for something else. Try again sparkling water with lime, or herbal tea. I love golden milk, which is a turmeric tea. You can even try a calming routine like journaling or reading, because small changes, small, tiny changes, are going to make a big impact. So just find out those things that work for you. Write down different things. You can do so. When you do feel like you're in that moment and you can't really think about it, you can look at that list and pick something that sounds good to you.

Speaker 1:

And the last one is to seek support. You do not have to do this alone. So whether it's a trusted friend, your spouse, a coach, a group of like-minded people, having support can make all the difference. That's why my Sacred Sobriety Lab we have group coaching and a community, and it's beautiful seeing all the women supporting each other and also getting so much out of hearing the others get coached, because even if our circumstances aren't exactly the same. We can learn so much from each other. But even if you don't have that, just having a supportive friend or, again, your spouse who can just kind of cheer you on and support you in those situations especially like social situations and things can be super beneficial.

Speaker 1:

Okay, before we wrap up, I just want to let you know this you are not stuck, you are definitely not broken, and you are absolutely capable of living a life free from alcohol's grip. It is about progress and not perfection. One small decision at a time is going to take you closer and closer to the life you desire, a life filled with energy, clarity, joy and health. So if you're ready to take that first step, I would love to help you. You can book a free consultation with me and we can discover what's keeping you stuck and create a plan that works especially for you. Thanks for hanging out with me today.

Speaker 1:

If this episode resonated with you, please share it with a friend or rate and review it. It will help more people find my podcast and get the help that they need, and also it will help them know that they are not alone. You've got this. I'm cheering for you and I will see you next time. Well, that does it for this episode of the Catholic Sobriety Podcast. I hope you enjoyed this episode and I would invite you to share it with a friend, who might also get value from it as well. And make sure you subscribe so you don't miss a thing. I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach, and if you would like to learn how to work with me or learn more about the coaching that I offer, visit my website, thecatholicsobrietycoachcom. Follow me on Instagram at the Catholic Sobriety Coach. I look forward to speaking to you next time, and remember I am here for you, I am praying for you, you are not alone.

Podcasts we love

Check out these other fine podcasts recommended by us, not an algorithm.