Ep147: When You Want That Glass of Wine at 5 P.M. — Here’s What’s Actually Happening

It’s 5 p.m. — dinner’s not ready, your brain’s fried, and that little voice whispers, “You deserve a glass of wine.”
Sound familiar? You’re not alone, and you’re not broken.

In this episode, Catholic sobriety coach Christie Walker explains what’s really happening inside your brain during the evening “danger zone.” Discover how dopamine dips trigger cravings, why your body craves relief more than alcohol, and how faith and neuroscience work beautifully together to bring peace instead of pressure.

Christie shares five practical ways to turn “wine hour” into “peace hour,” plus the hope, humor, and holy perspective you need to stay steady when the urge hits.

✨ What You’ll Learn:

• The science behind evening cravings (dopamine dips + habit loops)
• Faith-based tools for rewiring your evenings
• How to change your cue and calm your body
• Why freedom feels better than relief

I'm here for you. I'm praying for you. You are NOT alone!

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Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome & The 5 p.m. Danger Zone
• 2:26 Dopamine Dip and Habit Loops
• 5:09 Limbic Takeover and Neuroplasticity
• 7:11 Faith Meets Neuroscience
• 8:45 Five Tools to Rewire Evenings
• 13:12 Living the Shift and Lasting Freedom
• 14:10 Invitation to Sacred Sobriety Lab & Closing

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the go-to resource for women seeking to have a deeper understanding of the role alcohol plays in their lives. Women who are looking to drink less or not at all for any reason. I am your host, Christy Walker. I'm a wife, mom, and a joy-filled Catholic. And I am the Catholic sobriety coach. And I am so glad you're here. Okay, tell me if this sounds familiar. It's 4 58 p.m. The day is starting to come to an end, but the to-do list isn't. And someone just yelled from the other room asking, What's for dinner? You've been on all day, making decisions, solving problems, keeping the house running, holding everyone else's emotions. And suddenly your body is begging for one thing: relief. That little voice whispers, you deserve a glass of wine. And if you've promised yourself not tonight, but then you found yourself pouring just one anyway, only to promise again tomorrow. I just want you to know you're not alone. 5 p.m. is what I call the danger zone, but not in a dramatic way or a Kenny Loggins kind of way. It's simply the hour when your brain and your body start craving comfort the most. Something real is happening with your physiology. And once you understand it, you can let go of the shame and you can stop fighting yourself and start working with your brain and with grace to rewrite that story. Sugar, scrolling, snacking, same wiring, different flavor. So today we're unpacking what's actually happening inside your brain during that temptation hour and how to rewire your evenings without white knuckling, shame, or tomorrow I'll do better pep talks. Okay, let's get into it. So why does 5 p.m. feel like such a battle? Well, the first thing you need to know is that there's nothing wrong with you. Around late afternoon, everyone experiences a natural dopamine dip. Dopamine is your motivation, your reward chemical. It's what gives you that little at a girl feeling when you cross something off your to-do list or finish a task. By 5 p.m., you've been giving all day, making meals, making money, making peace between children, and your brain's just saying, hey, we need something that feels good right now. And because your brain is super, super smart, but a little lazy, it doesn't brainstorm new ideas. It just remembers what worked last time. And that's where habits come from. So if wine has been your evening reset, then your brain remembers wine equals relief. Now, if like me, you've been alcohol free for a long time, your brain still runs that old code sometimes. For me, the craving shows up as sugar or doom scrolling or wanting coffee at four o'clock in the afternoon. It's the same craving, just dressed in different clothes. Now, Dr. Andrew Huberman calls this the limbic takeover when the emotional reward-seeking part of your brain hijacks your logical side. You're not weak. You're human. Isn't that the best news? Your brain is just doing exactly what it was wired to do to search for comfort. And here's some more good news. What feels like a weakness is actually an opportunity because you can retrain that brain. All right, let's talk about how the habit loop hooks you. Every repetitive behavior you do, good or bad, runs on a loop. You'll have a cue, a craving, a response, and a reward. So a cue is something that triggers you. Maybe the clock hits five, maybe your spouse pours a drink, maybe you feel lonely or overwhelmed or unappreciated. And then there's the craving. Your brain saying, Hey sis, we need some relief. And then your response is that you pour, sip, scroll, or snack. And then there's the reward. Just a dopamine surge. The reward is dopamine. And if you're doing something like scrolling or snacking or getting sugar, you're gonna get a little spike or surge of dopamine. But if you consume alcohol, you are going to get a ginormous firework dopamine spike, which I'm sorry to say is short-lived. And that's part of the reason that you keep chasing that buzz all evening long. But with it, it does bring brief calm. Unfortunately, it can then bring guilt, fatigue, or anxiety. And here's what makes it tricky. The brain doesn't judge the reward, it just wants that quick relief feeling. But the more we follow that loop, the deeper the grooves become. Thankfully, your brain is plastic. Well, not literally plastic. It's neuroplasticity, which means your brain can change. And every time you pause instead of pouring or pray instead of grabbing, you are literally rewiring those neural pathways. Romans 12, 2 wasn't just poetic, it's actually neuroscience in action. Be transformed by the renewal of your mind. You are renewing your mind and your wiring when you interrupt that loop. So the goal isn't to fight the craving, the goal is to redirect it. Now let's talk about faith meeting neuroscience. This is where things get really beautiful because God designed our brains to adapt and heal. He knew we would need grace in those gray areas, those moments when we're just not doing great, but we're still really trying. It's the moment that you get to say, Okay, Lord, my brain wants comfort, but my heart wants peace. Help me choose you. You don't have to shame the craving or hide from it. You just need to retrain it. So how do we do that? How do we retrain the brain and restore peace at the same time? Well, just like with anything, any new habit or anything that we take on, we have to start small. We start practical and we start with five little steps that will help you rewire your evenings and retrain your brain. You're gonna name it, change your cue, move your body, replace the reward, and laugh a little. Okay, let's walk through the five tools for rewiring the 5 p.m. spike. First, you're gonna name it. The second you feel the urge hit, say it out loud. This is my 5 p.m. spike. Naming what's happening moves you out of emotion and into observation. You're no longer in the craving, you're noticing it, and that's powerful. When you name it, you shift from shame, from what's wrong with me to awareness. Ah, my dopamine dip is here. You can even add a little humor. Hello there, dopamine dip. I was wondering when you would show up. That one small line disarms the entire moment. You've already interrupted the loop. Alright, let's talk about changing your cue because cues are sneaky little things. If your kitchen has become the place your brain associates with pouring wine, then friend, we need to give that space a new assignment. When you are prepping dinner instead of reaching for the corkscrew, grab your prettiest glass and fill it with sparkling water or iced tea. Because let's be real, the glassware was never the problem. If it's the sound that triggers you, the pop of the cork, the clink of the glass, replace that sound cue. Turn on worship music, put on your favorite playlist or podcast. I know women who light a candle around 5 p.m. as a physical reminder that peace is entering this space now, even inviting the Holy Spirit in. Maybe it's not even the kitchen though. Maybe it's walking in from work, seeing your spouse pour a drink, or just that first quiet moment when you finally stop running. That's when I want you to shake things up. Move your body, step outside on your porch for a couple minutes, breathe deeply, stretch, change the environment so your body realizes we're not starting wine hour, we're starting peace hour. I call this confusing the craving. Your craving expects one thing. You surprise it with another. Sometimes I'll literally say out loud, okay, Lord, new rhythm here. Help me find you instead of the sugar. You're not running away from the craving. You're retraining your brain. And every time you change the cue, you strengthen that new peaceful pathway. The third tool is to move your body. Movement is medicine, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. When you move, even gently, your brain releases endorphins that calm anxiety and lower stress hormones. So when the 5 p.m. spike hits, try this. Walk outside, do 10 squats while waiting for the pasta to boil, turn on a worship song and dance with your kids like it's in 1999. They'll totally roll their eyes, but I've convinced myself they secretly love it. The goal isn't exercise, it's energy shift. You're telling your brain we're not stuck, we're moving forward, and you'll feel the difference almost immediately. And then the fourth tool is to replace the reward. Your brain doesn't actually crave alcohol, it craves the feeling alcohol gives you relief, connection, and comfort. So instead of trying to remove the reward, replace it. Maybe that's a mock tail ritual with fresh lime and mint. Maybe it's sitting outside with a devotional. Maybe it's texting a friend instead of pouring a drink. Give your brain a new story. One of my favorite neuroscience facts from Dr. Anna Lemke of Dopamine Nation is that discipline and joy are actually linked. Every time you delay gratification in favor of alignment, you build a deeper sense of happiness. So when you say no to the drink, you're not depriving yourself. You're training joy. And speaking of joy, my fifth tool is to laugh a little. Seriously, humor heals. When you feel that tension building, find a way to lighten it up. Watch a funny reel, but don't scroll too long. Call a friend who makes you laugh, or just laugh at the absurdity of it all. Sometimes I tell my cravings, nice try, but I've already brushed my teeth. And if all else fails, toast your sparkling water and say, cheers to adulting one more day without losing my peace. Because laughter releases dopamine too. It's your body's God-designed guilt-free reward system. If you can laugh, you can breathe. If you can breathe, you can choose. And if you can choose, you're already winning. Now, even after nearly 30 years without alcohol, my 5 p.m. spike still visits sometimes. These days, it just wears different clothes. Cookies, Instagram, just one more thing before bed. But now instead of fear, I feel awareness. I know that craving is just my brain's way of saying, we're tired and we want to feel okay. So I ask myself, what do you actually need? Because you don't need that. And then I smile and take a breath and remind myself, we don't need to escape at this moment. We need to invite God into it. That shift from avoidance to invitation is where freedom is. You don't have to fight your cravings forever. You just have to learn to see them as signals instead of shame. And friend, you can do this one 5 p.m. at a time. If today's episode gave you hope or made you smile at your own 5 p.m. madness, come and join us inside the Sacred Sobriety Lab. We're practicing new evening rhythms that restore peace, joy, and connection. You'll find faith-based coaching, community, and women who get it, because freedom really does feel better than relief. To learn more, go to Sacred Sobriety Lab.com. Keep choosing peace over pressure one evening at a time. Well, that does it for this episode of the Catholic Sobriety Podcast. I hope you enjoyed this episode and I would invite you to share it with a friend who might also get value from it as well. And make sure you subscribe so you don't miss a thing. I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach, and if you would like to learn how to work with me or learn more about the coaching that I offer, visit my website, the Catholic Sobriety Coach.