Ep 149: Mocktails vs. replacements: what really helps

When you start drinking less, it’s tempting to swap your wine for a mocktail — but does that actually help? In this episode, Christie unpacks the truth about replacements: what works, what doesn’t, and how to tell the difference. You’ll learn how to identify the need beneath the craving, use neuroscience and faith to retrain your reward system, and build new evening rituals that bring real peace — not just another substitute.

You’ll hear about:

• The hidden “why” behind your evening drink
• When mocktails help — and when they keep you stuck
• How dopamine and habit loops influence cravings
• Real mind–body–soul replacements that actually satisfy
• A faith-based framework for choosing true peace over imitation comfort

Replacing alcohol isn’t about deprivation — it’s about redirection. Learn how to meet your real needs with rest, prayer, and presence instead of pouring another glass.

The Catholic Mom Bundle is available for one week only, and it’s packed with beautiful, faith-filled resources to help you prepare for Advent with more peace and less overwhelm.

It’s an incredible value, and my Reclaiming Peace Gentle Alcohol Reset is included as a bonus.

If this is something your heart needs right now, the link is in my show notes. It’s only here for a few days, so don’t wait!

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Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome And Purpose
• 1:10 Why We Reach For A Drink
• 3:01 Mocktails As A Bridge
• 5:06 Social Signals And Having A Handheld
• 5:46 The Caution: Rituals And Triggers
• 7:46 Neuroscience Of Anticipation And Reward
• 10:13 Replace The Reward, Not Just The Drink
• 11:54 Mind, Body, And Soul Replacements
• 13:49 Discernment, Faith, And True Peace
• 14:57 Invitations, Resources, And Closing

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:40

Welcome to the Catholic Sobriety Podcast, the go-to resource for women seeking to have a deeper understanding of the role alcohol plays in their lives. Women who are looking to drink less or not at all for any reason. I am your host, Christy Walker. I'm a wife, mom, and a joy-filled Catholic, and I am the Catholic sobriety coach, and I am so glad you're here. Welcome back, friends. Today we are diving into something that stirs up a lot of curiosity. Mocktails and the whole world of replacements. If you've ever asked yourself, should I replace my evening wine with something else, or am I just tricking my brain with these mocktails? This episode is for you. So let's first start here. When you reach for a drink, it's almost never just about the drink. It's actually about the moment, the pause, the reward, the transition from doing to being. So when we talk about replacements, whether that's a mocktail, sparkling water, herbal tea, or even non-alcoholic wine, beer, and spirits, what we're really asking is, what am I trying to experience right now? Is it connection? Is it comfort? Is it celebration? Or am I actually just trying to signal to my body, like the work day is done, you can rest? Are you just looking for a delineation between the work part of your day, the busy part of your day, the doing all the things kind of your day, to the restful time of the day? When we bring awareness to that need that's underneath the craving, then we can move from reacting to responding. And that's where true transformation begins. One of the things that I usually invite people to do is to ask themselves two questions. What am I feeling? And what do I need? Before even thinking about pouring themselves a drink. Now let's talk mocktails. I love pretty glasses, a little bit of mint, some lime, and maybe a splash of cranberry juice or something. I personally do not get super fancy with mocktails. I have. I've made some non-alcoholic margaritas and some other things, but I'm more of a just pour it and add a couple little things to make it look fancy. But I know people who get super fancy and have all the things and really like to put a lot of time and effort into it. They almost make it like another sort of calming ritual. And if that's you and you love to do that, I think it's great. Mocktails can be a really beautiful bridge, especially in those early stages of reducing or eliminating alcohol. And now here's why this can help, because as I just mentioned, they support the ritual without the risk. So it's the ritual of making a mocktail, especially if that's something that you do nightly. They satisfy that dopamine cue of I'm doing something special. Now we've talked about the different ways that alcohol actually really spikes your dopamine level when you drink it, but you actually get little dopamine hits, even just like planning it, just thinking about it. And so again, when you have that thought, I'm doing something special, then you get a little bit of that dopamine that's like, ooh, that feels good. I that sounds like something I would like to do. And then mocktails can also make social situations easier, especially if you're somebody that gets uncomfortable or worried about what other people think. Even if you're not, though, sometimes they can be great to have. I usually always will order like at least a sparkling water with lime when my husband and I go to an event, just so that I have something in my hand, because it just gives me that feeling of having something special. But it also signals to other people like that I already have something. So they don't need to ask me. Because sometimes if I don't have something in my hand, people ask me, do you want a glass of wine? Do you want, you know, XYZ? And so if I have something, not only do I have that thought of like, I'm part of the moment, but I also am signaling to others like I'm good, I have something to drink. So here's the caution though. If your brain still associates that ritual, that glass, that clink, that pour with alcohol reward, then your mocktail might actually keep that neural pathway alive. And I have had clients, I always tell clients, you know, try it, try, you know, non-alcoholic wines and beers and spirits and that kind of thing if you want, and making mocktails. But I've had some, some clients are great with it, they love it. It's a it's a great bridge, like I was saying, between drink, you know, like a regular habit and kind of changing that habit. But I've also had clients that come to me and say, Christy, this is actually making it so much harder. And I just feel like now I'm just replacing that alcohol with something else that I have to like plug in there, but it's not really satisfying. So it's almost more frustrating. So this is where awareness matters because that's something that you can test out and see like, does it work? Is it working for me? Does it leave me dissatisfied and wanting more? So you might ask yourself the question, am I enjoying this for what it is? Or am I just pretending it's wine? Like, do I really love this mock tail? Like, does it taste good? Does it, you know, feel good in my hand? Does it um give me all of the things that are does it help me kind of delineate my daytime from my nighttime? Or am I just pretending it's wine? So if the thought of pouring something into a wine glass feels like comfort or a fix, that's worth noticing because your brain might not yet know the difference, and we don't want to accidentally reinforce the very loop you're trying to break. However, if it does work for you, like I had a client say that she, and I may have mentioned this before on another podcast, but she loves those cute little decorative napkins. And she would make herself like this little drink. It was like sparkling water and something else. And when she decided to stop drinking, she would make that exact same drink, but just not put the alcohol in it. And she still loved it because she noticed like the feel of the glass in her hand, the condensation on the glass, that beautiful napkin. And I guess she has like a whole drawer of like different ones for different seasons and different themes. And it's just like one of those little pleasures that she just really enjoys. And she said that it was not a hard switch for her. Like that totally worked for her. So that's where getting curious, noticing is this causing chaos, or actually, does it make me feel relaxed? Is it, you know, kind of giving me the peace that I'm seeking, or, you know, whatever. So here's what neuroscience has to say now. Your brain releases dopamine, the feel good, pay attention, chemical, not just from drinking alcohol, but from anticipation of reward. I talked about that earlier. So that means that the sound of the cork, the clink of the ice, even like the lighting of a candle, can become dopamine triggers. So when you pour that mocktail, your brain lights up before the first sip, saying, Oh, this is our reward moment. Now, hear me out. That is not a bad thing. It's just how habit loops form. So the goal isn't to eliminate pleasure, it's just to retrain your brain to find pleasure in healthier ways, right? So through rest, through beauty, through prayer, through movement, through real connection. So that's why I say don't just replace your drink, actually replace the reward. And we've talked about this before. It's like the cue, craving, and reward. So you could still have that cue, which could be like the time of day. And the craving would be that feeling or thought that you have, right? I need, I need rest. The reward, instead of it being alcohol, you can replace that reward with something else. So, how do we do that? Well, when you stop drinking or greatly reduce how much you're drinking, your brain is temporarily low on dopamine and serotonin. So we want to feed it good replacements, those replacements that rebuild your reward system instead of hijacking it. Here are some categories that might help. So for your mind, you could be journaling or even voice noting, like how your evenings feel without alcohol. You could listen to worship music, dance, sing along, um, listen to a guided reflection. You can light a candle and read scripture, you know, just something to kind of activate your mind. Maybe you like doing, I don't know, like sudoku or crocheting or knitting or something like that. Those things can be really helpful. Now, for your body, you could go for a sunset walk or make a cozy herbal tea or even one of those sleepy girl mocktails. It's basically like magnesium, a splash of cherry juice, and sparkling water. And that'll help you kind of relax and even fall asleep easier. You could do something tactile like put lotion on your hands, do a nice facial or something, take a warm bath or even some stretching. And then you can also feed your soul by praying the examine at the end of the day, asking yourself, like, where did I feel God's presence? Maybe write down three things that you're grateful for that day, or maybe one thing that would have been blurry, or maybe you wouldn't have noticed if you had been drinking. And then you can also offer the craving as a prayer. Like, Lord, I surrender this desire. Please show me what I really need. I want you to know that replacing alcohol isn't about deprivation. We don't want to just remove something and leave a gaping hole there. It's about redirection, about finding a new way of replacing that reward and building a new habit path. Now, as Catholics, we understand that freedom isn't just about the ability to choose, but the capacity to choose the good. So mocktails can be a stepping stone toward that freedom, or they can keep us tethered to old patterns. So here's a good discernment tool. Ask yourself Does this help me feel more present to God, to others, and myself? If the answer is yes, that's awesome. Go for it. If not, then maybe just pause and ask the Holy Spirit to show you what that craving is really pointing toward. Because often beneath the desire for a drink is the desire for peace. And peace is a fruit of the spirit, not the kind of spirit that you find in a bottle. So what actually helps? I mean, sometimes it's a mock tail, sometimes it's a new evening routine, sometimes it's pausing long enough to pray something like Jesus, fill this space where the drink used to be. Your journey is uniquely yours. The goal is not perfection, it's peace, it's presence, it's progress. Now, if this episode spoke to you, I would love it if you would share it or leave a quick review. It helps other women find this work. And if you're ready to go deeper into faith-based habit change, join us in the Sacred Sobriety Lab. You'll find the tools, neuroscience, and spiritual guidance to make these changes stick for good. Until next time, stay close to Jesus, stay curious, and keep walking this sober-ish path. I'll talk to you again soon. Well, that does it for this episode of the Catholic Sobriety Podcast. I hope you enjoyed this episode, and I would invite you to share it with a friend who might also get value from it as well. And make sure you subscribe so you don't miss a thing. I am the Catholic Sobriety Coach, and if you would like to learn how to work with me or learn more about the coaching that I offer, visit my website, the Catholic Sobriety Coach dot com.