125. The Cost of a Bigger Life with Lachlan Stuart

So here's what happened...

I was mid-session at a Ray White strategy day - talking about how to achieve any goal you set for yourself - when I spotted someone walk into the back of the room.

And I completely lost my train of thought. Because I knew exactly who it was.

Lachlan Stuart. Endurance athlete. High performance coach. Man who ran 58 marathons in 58 days across all 50 US states and 8 Australian territories. And husband of the beautiful Amy Sheppard.

And my immediate thought was - what is HE doing here.

Turns out he was speaking after me. Cool cool cool.

I jumped on my Instagram stories after my session and mentioned that I'd spotted him and had a minor internal meltdown. He saw the story. And then messaged me to say he felt the exact same way watching me speak.

Two speakers. Same room. Both thinking how do I follow THAT person.
And now he's on The Shake Up Podcast. So.

In this episode Lachlan and I get into the real stuff - what it actually costs to build a bigger life, which part of your life quietly collapses first when you're just ticking along, and why most people are surviving well but living far too small
.
This one is going to sit with you. I promise.

Find Lauchie: 
https://www.lachlanstuart.com.au/
https://www.instagram.com/lachlanstuart/

🎧 If this episode made you think, laugh, or question something - send it to someone who needs a little permission to do life differently. 

📲 Screenshot, tag me @candiceharvey__, and let me know what hit home.

Oh and check out my FUN website for all my services: www.candiceharvey.com 

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:02

Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to the Shake Up Podcast. If this is your first time joining me, thank you so much for being here. My name is Candace Harvey. I am a speaker and workshop facilitator, but today I am chatting with the incredible Loughlin Stewart. Now, if you don't know him and if you haven't been a little bit awestruck by this man the first time you met him like I was, let me tell you why. So Loughlin Stewart is an endurance athlete and high performance coach who understands what it takes to sustain success physically, mentally, and emotionally. He became the first person to run 58 marathons in 58 days across all 50 US states and eight Australian territories, overcoming injuries, of course, extreme conditions, and the relentless pressure of a plan with no margin for error. Beyond this world of first feat, Lachlan has also rode 30 marathons in 30 days, hosted more than 640 podcast episodes over Achiever, toured internationally with his wife, and built the Man That Can project into a global movement helping high-performing men lead themselves with clarity and purpose. Along the way, he has raised more than $160,000 for mental health, proving his belief that endurance should create impact beyond the individual. Lochland speaks with honesty about the realities behind achievement, the setbacks, the doubts, and resilience required when plans break down. Oh my gosh. So with that, welcome to the Shake Up Podcast, Lockie.

SPEAKER_01 1:31

Candace, thanks for having me on. If you can read that bio, you can run a marathon. I can tell you. Like that is the trans, the skill transference there is real.

SPEAKER_04 1:42

That is so cute, Lockie. But I you have not seen me run, but that is lovely that we think that we can run a marathon. I love that so much.

SPEAKER_01 1:52

It's a good way to hit it off that hit it out of the park. But as we were saying, it's very flattering to hear the intros come through, knowing full well I wrote every word of that.

SPEAKER_04 2:02

I know, I love that we're actually just saying that before we hit record that when you are doing speaking gigs and you get all like a little bit flattered when people are reading the words that you wrote, but it's just the the awkward part of it. So we have to sit through and listen to it. But he had a smile on his face the whole time. So you've got to be pretty proud with your bio.

SPEAKER_01 2:18

Made me feel good. You've got to find the wins. Any win in the day is worthwhile taking.

SPEAKER_04 2:25

Oh, I love it, God. I'm so excited for this conversation. So, Lockie, I have to start with where we met. So we actually met really briefly at a Ray White strategy day. I think it was last month, pre-moving house. I think it was It was last month. Was it?

SPEAKER_01 2:41

I do have it on my calendar somewhere. There's so many stickers. Yeah, it was on the fourth of the year. There you go.

SPEAKER_04 2:45

Yeah. So this particular fourth. Oh my god, it feels like forever ago, but not really. And we were both actually speakers. And I need to tell the listeners what happened because it still actually makes me laugh. And I was what was basically happening is I was coming to the end of my session, my session on how to achieve any goal that you set for yourself. And you walked in. You walked into the room, and I completely, for a really small tiny moment, I lost my train of thought because I was like, oh my god, I know him. That's Lockie. I follow him on socials. He's married to one of the most beautiful ladies, Amy Shepherd. Like I knew exactly who you were. And then I was like, shit, what is he doing here? And what you were doing there is you were running a session after me. So after my session, standard, I jumped into my car, I got out my Instagram and I set on stories that I told the whole story basically about spotting you and that I freaked out for a brief moment. And then after your session, you saw my story and you actually messaged me and you said you felt the exact same way watching me. It was that whole, oh shit, how do I follow her moment, which I think is hilarious as human beings, right? So before we get into anything else, I would actually love to know, Lockie, what was going through your mind on that day?

SPEAKER_01 3:57

I still remember walking in and I was like, how good is this? Firstly, that I'm gonna get to learn. Because I think I got about 20 minutes of your your uh workshop, and I I wish I'd got there earlier now, knowing the notes that I have here. So I just pulled out my um notepad, but the same thing goes through as I'm writing notes, you know, around your three A's and everything like that. I'm sitting at the back of the room, I'm like, how the hell am I gonna follow this? Like, we have a lot of um similarities in in things that we were talking about. I'm just like, this is so good. Why do why do this why does the team need me? So it was tough to to follow. And the way that you speak and the way that you held the room, I this is what I love also. As much as like sometimes when you compare yourself to others, you can feel a bit shit. I was also like, well, at least now I know areas that I can improve because you held the room so well, I was like, that's what I want to develop. Like, how can I have everyone actually really engaged, pumped to hear the words that I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04 4:55

Oh, that is so nice. Talk about grabbing all the wins first thing on a Monday morning locking and feeling very, very great about myself. Um, but it's just it's hilarious, isn't it? Because I literally, in my head in that moment, I was like, what is this man who does such incredible things? What is he gonna learn from me in terms of goal setting? And I saw you, I literally saw as soon as I was saying a new A, I saw your pen to paper. I was like, he's writing this shit down. Like he's writing it down, even when I said at the end, like, put your hand up on which ones you enjoy the most, you put your hand up. I was like, what is happening? Like this, but really, after you sort of messaged me saying that you were thinking a similar thing, I was like, we all, it doesn't matter where we are, it doesn't matter the experiences we've gone through, whether we've done 58 marathons or none, we can still actually learn from each other. And it really did blow me away a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 5:47

I still I still remember when you were talking about action, because the question one of the questions was like, put your hand up, which of the three you need the to work on the most awareness, acceptance, or action. I was like, action, like every day of the week. There's more that I could do. There's things that like fear that holds me back from doing certain things. And as we're obviously talking to a room of salespeople at Ray White and the team there, that can hold a lot of salespeople back, is the action piece. And I just remember being like, oh, I may as well say it. Like, is everyone gonna think I do I lose credibility now by putting my hand up? But I'm also a big believer that none of us are perfect and everyone that we get the opportunity to meet in life is an expert in something that we're not. So I always carry this book. Well, I'm looking for a smaller notepad, but I carry this book with me everywhere, and no word of a life candice. When we moved into our new place here, um, or be 12 months ago, my wife literally has a box full of notebooks that I have because everywhere I go, whether it's a lunch or whatever, I'm taking notes from people, and then I get to read back through it and go, that was a brilliant idea from such and such that I heard in 2014. Haven't done anything about that. So maybe I should act on that now, not just have the information there.

SPEAKER_04 7:01

I love that. How long have you actually been doing that, Lockie? Like writing things down, like obviously you've got countless books, but when did that all start for you?

SPEAKER_01 7:09

2014.

SPEAKER_04 7:10

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 7:11

Yep. So I've legitimately got workbooks and not all of them are nice moleskins like this one, but I've got so many, so many notebooks um from 2014 because I was just, and a lot of it's from workshops that I was attending or books that I was reading, but I made a habit because of Jim Rohn, and I listened and I've listened to his audiobook so many times where he's like, There's three treasures that you leave behind, and the first one is your bookshelf because people can understand where you got your ideas from and what you what you um trained your thoughts. Then the second is your photographs because they can see what your life was like, and now obviously we get podcasts and we also get videography, which is why I have cameras everywhere all the time. Not everywhere, but a lot of the time. And then the third one is your journals, because they can understand what was going through your mind, what you were reading about, the challenges that you had, um, the questions that you were seeking answers for. And it's funny, like, if I go back and read when I was putting them in a box to send them back to my parents' place in Toomba, some of the challenges that were the biggest problems in my life. Like, I was an Uber driver at one point, Candace. So um, when I just I was playing rugby in France, moved back, didn't know what I was gonna do, so I started driving Uber, and it was awesome. I got to meet a lot of great people. I remember distinctively because my wife was out earning me, and as a bloke, and she wasn't my wife at the time, but as a bloke, that was really tough. I thought I was supposed to be the breadwinner, and the only goal I had at that time was like when I have a thousand bucks in my bank, I've made it. When I have a thousand dollars of savings, that's that's it. And we all know what happens when you achieve a goal, like the goalposts change. But that to me was the thing, and I have that in a journal. It's freaking wild to read that. And that was something that I read and then I did a post about whenever it was a couple of months ago, because I was reminded by that. And there's there's a beauty in understanding where you were at a certain period in life because sometimes we forget that, yeah, and we just think we woke up one day with all of the beauty and the challenges without having realized we've already overcome a lot of challenges and we've already experienced a lot of beautiful things. Sorry for the segue.

SPEAKER_04 9:29

No, I love segues. I love this. Like I was actually reading Robin Sharmer's book on the weekend, and he was saying, I'm probably gonna butcher this, but it was something about like he write takes a book around with him everywhere as well to write all his thoughts. So it's exactly what you do. And he was saying that clear thoughts create a clear life. And I was like, I loved that. Like it was so beautiful to read that. Because if we're if we're not writing, if we're not processing, if we're not getting it all out, it does just become so like you were saying, like life's busy, there's so much going on, and our minds just become super mush, right? But if we're getting it out and it becomes clear, it becomes the most important things, then it gets to be that stepping stone for kind of like what's what's next. And it makes me think with 2014, like, what was life like prior to that? If all of a sudden this is a new habit that you started to do, something that you can't let go of that you really enjoy doing. I wonder what your thoughts were like pre-2014.

SPEAKER_01 10:21

My thoughts were terrible. I didn't realize, firstly, I didn't know personal development was a thing. I got introduced to personal development when I was struggling from a guy I was playing footy with, and he invited me to a personal development event. I was like, what's that? And he's like, Well, it's an event where you'll like learn things about yourself, but you're in a rough spot. I think it would be very good for you. And so when he said that, I try I had a lot of respect for this guy. He used to play international rugby. And so if he's going to it, I'm kind of thinking, I should do that too, because I have nothing going on in my life. And so I did that, and that's when I got exposed to it. And you know, within I'd say six months, that's when the journaling got introduced to me. And I was like, cool. But prior to that, like the best thing I've heard around writing in particular or journaling is that it's your thoughts slowed down. And I still have a very busy mind. But the more that I write, the more that I feel like I can explain things very clearly, and the more I feel in control of what I'm actually here to do day in, day out. If I don't do it, shit gets busy. I either feel super anxious because I don't know what I'm working towards, like there's fear of the unknown, or I'm feeling overwhelmed because I am doing too many things and I don't understand why I'm doing the things. And so it helps me, I guess, break that down.

SPEAKER_04 11:38

Yeah, I love that. So even if I just want to talk about you, obviously, a lot throughout this conversation, but I'm really excited to dig into this. This is a really good thing, it'd be weird if I got you on just to talk about myself, Lockie, but I do want to talk about you. Um, but the fact that you are the person who has ran 58 marathons in 58 days. Like, I I remember following you and watching this journey, like, which feels like a real sloth thing to do, like watching you behind a phone, like, go, Lockie, you're amazing. I could never do that. You're batshit crazy, right? But across 50 US states, eight Australian territories, raising a bucket load of money, you know, rolling 30 marathon distances in 30 days. Like, why are you like this, Lockie? Is my question. Why are you like this?

SPEAKER_01 12:21

I get asked this all the time. I have this first it's like I don't know, but I've accepted this as the way I am. No, I think for me, I everyone has their thing, right? Everyone, I believe, has this feeling in their stomach that they're here to do something. And some of us do it and others don't. When I was playing, my goal was always to be a professional athlete. I just love sport, and I I always have two voices on my shoulder. One's like the you're not good enough, you're not worthy, you're a waste of space. And the other voice is like, you're good, you're doing stuff, you're doing amazing things. And when I'm playing sport, it's more of this one, more of the positive voice for those who are listening, not watching. And I've always found that when I'm not playing sport, my mental health's in the bin. When I am, or just exercising, it's it's thriving. And so my goal was to play professional rugby, moved overseas to France to play that and had that opportunity, basically butchered it, came back to Australia, and I'm three to four years behind all my buddies. So I'm 21, 22 at this time, and my friends are finishing their university degrees, their doctors, lawyers, you know, all the cool things, engineers. And then my other buddies are finishing their trades. So I'm looking around thinking, well, I'm so far behind everyone, like I'm a failure. And I didn't know what I was gonna do after that. And that's a daunting feeling, especially as a young bloke when you don't necessarily have a lot of great role models around you to just be like, mate, this is just the closing of one chapter, there's more opportunity, you can transfer skills. I didn't have that, so I just thought if sports out of my life, we're done. And so I did what most people do through a challenging life transition is they drink a lot of booze and party a fair bit as a 21 to 22 year old, and realized that that was only going to get me in trouble. So I found myself in trouble one day, um, which I wasn't proud about, but I I was looking around, I had police around me, and I had a lot of people around this nightclub looking at me, and I was thinking, like, you're not supposed to be in this position. Like, you went to a great school, you have an immense amount of talent, you have a loving family, you have everything that a lot of people can't say to have those things. And you're carrying on like an absolute dickhead. Within the space of a few months, I decided I was gonna leave where I grew up in Toomba and was gonna change my life. I didn't really know what that looked like, but fast forward the guy invited me to the personal development event. I started reading books and I realized that the thoughts that I had, I wasn't the only one who had them. I could change, and I became so hungry to prove to myself and to prove to other people that I could be different to how I had been in that sort of window of being an I'd say a degenerate for for me. And um, yeah, that that ultimately then kept me, I guess, fired up and hungry to see what I was capable of. And as I've been rambling here, Candace, I've completely forgotten the top up. No, I haven't. I've watched it. Why are you answering it beautiful? Why are you liking it? Yeah, uh yeah, I was tying it back and did a 58. And so when I moved down to Brisbane then, or out to Brisbane, I started Uber driving, and I didn't know necessarily what was going to be next. So I I partnered with a gym here in Brisbane called Function Well and the charity called Live In. And I wanted to do a I guess a workout where we got people together and to talk about mental health because I know I was struggling, and at this point I was starting to use uh social media to write posts and post photos and talk about it, and people were asking me questions. And so we did that, and we had the gym community together, and it was awesome. And we raised a bit of money, people were so pumped, you know, when you get to a workout, it's awesome. And so the next year we did the same thing and it grew, and then I started doing 12-hour challenges with buddies and friends and 12-hour overnight walks, 24-hour challenges, and the challenges just kept getting bigger and bigger, and we kept raising more and more money, which was awesome. And some of the coolest things that happened along the way, Candace, not only was I proving to myself I was capable of more, I was starting to find purpose, but I was bringing more men together, and I focused on working with men and giving men an opportunity to go through experiences together. But the underlying benefit of that was that we're going to start talking about other challenges in their life from marriages not working well to not being happy in their career to not being happy in their skin. And as the challenges got bigger, I saw these dudes pushing themselves more, and that's what fired me up. I still remember, and I'll never forget this so vividly. There's one guy, Scotty, and he's a great mate today. When I was rowing the 30 marathons in 30 days, I said to everyone, I'm like, unfortunately, because of um you know insurances and liability and all that sort of stuff, this one's a little bit too big. But this dude, he dragged a rower up every day and he rode 5k next to me for probably 20 days, then he started increasing to 10k. He ended up rowing two half marathons and a full marathon. And this guy, right, so he was 45 at the time, and he also always wanted to start his own business, but never had the confidence to do so. What transformed in him by doing something hard every single day was he found the confidence, and now he has his own business off the back of that because that helped him prove to himself he was capable of more. And for me, I I there's I can give you so many examples of things like that, not always just starting businesses, but doing things differently. That that's why I now do it. And for me, I didn't just wake up wanting to do 58 marathons. For me, that was my next challenge that I thought would one, I didn't think it was possible, two, it would bring an awesome adventure. I'm all about creating great adventures. But three, and most importantly, it would be a big story in terms of how I could showcase to people around the world what mental health feels like, right? We were going through all seasons and all terrain, and to me, that represents life, right? You go through the winter and everyone knows what winter feels like. It's shit, it's cold, you don't want to get out of bed, nothing's working. And then on the flip side of that is summer, it's just around the corner. And summer is where you're by the pool drinking margaritas, sun's on your back, like everything's working. You can't wait to get up and seize the day. And I got to show that in in real life. And the cool thing about, or maybe not so the cool thing about summer, but winter's always around the corner, so you need to be preparing. But when you're in winter, summer's also around the corner, and that's what led us to the 58. And every time they've got bigger, I've put myself out there to publicly fail potentially, but I've also given myself this opportunity to show people what it takes to get after chasing your dreams. And you know, we've raised over hundreds of thousands of dollars for mental health now over the last decade, which is is very important. And more importantly, it's just getting people moving to make those changes. So that's yeah, that's what I love. I guess my own mental health drives me.

SPEAKER_04 19:30

Yeah, I think you you answered that so beautifully as well, Lockie, because I think that people can like initially know about you or hear about you and be like, holy shit, like who is this guy? Like you said, people ask you that question all the time. Like, why are you like this? Because it can feel so like huge, you're right. Like running a marathon, mate, is ridiculous. And you did 58. So it can feel huge. But the way that you actually explained your story, which I love, and for people listening as well, it doesn't go from I'm doing nothing to I'm now doing 58 marathons in 58 days. Like it gets to be this, what am I gonna do that pushes me a little bit? What am I gonna do that stretches me a little bit? And it's it's personal, right? For everybody. Like I get that yours is now has to be pretty extreme for it to feel like it is that push, but for anyone else, it's we've got to kind of look at it personally and go, what feels like something that I would then do where I'd be super stoked with myself about? And so that gets to be the marker. It doesn't have to be the same as Lockie Stewart.

SPEAKER_01 20:28

It everyone has their own 58. It doesn't have to be physical. It could be going home and having a tough conversation with your partner that you've been kicking the can down the road for for a long time. Like there are plenty of hard things in my life that I've been avoiding. I just have found comfort in the physical stuff because I've been conditioning myself forever. I've played sport my whole life and at a high level. So it is comfortable. But I I know that if I do that in a specific area, I sure as hell can do it in another area of my life. And the more that I do it in 10 years' time, though what seems hard now, as I was saying with the journaling, I look back at what was hard in 2014, and now I just do that on a daily basis. And everyone has their own opportunity to do that, and everyone's capable of doing that. The key is just working out what's this what season are you really in? Are you in a summer or are you in a winter? Because when you're in summer, you can look at the top of the mountain and go, I'm going there.

SPEAKER_03 21:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:24

But in winter, you might just have to look at the top of your toes or the top of your shoe and go, I've just got to get that to move a little bit.

SPEAKER_04 21:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:30

And that's okay. Both are fine.

SPEAKER_04 21:32

Yeah, I love this. You also talk about Lockie, the the cost of achievement. And I I absolutely love this because this is all about, you know, people who finish what they set out to achieve are the people who decided the cost was actually worth it before they even started, which I think is really important because I think it was even something that I was talking about in that particular workshop where you, you know, you made me lose my train of thought. Yep, that particular one. But we're actually talking about the fact that people can have these big goals and big big ideas and big dreams. So exciting, like especially in the beginning. You're like, I'm gonna train for a marathon. Like, how exciting! That's what I'm gonna do. And then all of a sudden they start training and it feels hard, right? So they're the ones that go, Maybe I won't do it just yet, maybe I'll wait for next summer. That might be a better time to actually do it. But there is a cost of achievement. And I'm sure that when you started the 58 marathons as well, there was a cost that you already had accepted that maybe most people watching from the outside never saw. And I'd love to know what was that? Like, what was the cost of achievement for you?

SPEAKER_01 22:32

People quite frequently weirdly say they would love my life. And Candace, I tell you, most people wouldn't love my life. I love my life, but most people wouldn't. So when we talk about the cost of achievement, I've sacrificed and missed a lot of things over the years, things that are important to us. And so when I committed to doing the 58 marathons, we were living in America at the time, and my wife was touring, so we were touring a lot. And when you're going from show to show, state to state, you don't get much sleep. Uh so don't get much sleep at all. And the physical toll it took on us, I was then saying to my wife, like, if I do this, I'm gonna have to go all in. Like, I'm gonna have to obsess about this because for me to do something that I don't think's humanly possible, like I'd run four marathons in my life at this point. I'd never run a marathon back to back. So there's a lot of doubt, but there was also evidence from the rowing marathon that potentially my body can deal with these things. But I said to my wife, I have to do absolutely everything in my power to know that when I rocked up in Alaska on January 22nd, I've done the work. And so what that looked like for me was not drinking for 14 months. We were living in Nashville, Tennessee, Candace, and you go down Broadway, it is so much fun. Like it is the best time of your life. And so we're living literally 500 meters from Broadway, and everyone's going out partying, we're networking, we're hanging out with you know great musicians and whatnot, and I'm just staying super focused. I'm in bed at the same time. And then we're on the road. I've had three hours sleep because we've finished a gig at 2 a.m. We have to be back on the road at 7 a.m. I have to get up at 5 a.m. to do my run because I didn't want to skip a training session, I didn't miss a single session for 14 months. That's including international travel. So the cost of achievement for me was ruthless. Like I missed weddings, I missed birthday parties, I missed the adventure of a lifetime. More importantly, when it got to the actual adventure, my wife and I were going through IBF, and one of the most challenging things that we committed to, because Amy knew how hard I'd worked for it, like to get the sponsors on board to get it out logistically, like we're traveling to a different state every single day in blizzards, like nothing could go wrong. And I trained my backside off to be there. So when we got to the point we'd had three years of infertility to decide we're gonna do IVF, I was like, Well, I'm not gonna be there, and that feels terrible. Like you're about to go through something so huge as a family, and Amy's still turning me, and she's she's done this multiple times over the year, and she said, Yeah, but we're doing this for a greater purpose. Like I know you're gonna be there for the things, and I was on FaceTime obviously for the things that we could do, but she just said, like, just get this done. Like, you've done so much to do that, and that was a huge thing, but as a man, once again, like I've always struggled not being the you know, trying to get myself to be the main provider in our family. That's just how I've grown up and what I believe in, and that's something I pride myself on because I want to take care of my family, so then not being there for them while I'm chasing some ridiculous thing that really isn't life-defining when you think about it. It's just like it's an adventure. Um, felt pretty selfish. But these are some of the decisions you have to make, and I'm just grateful that Amy and I speak a lot about what we're both trying to achieve, and we have moments in our life where I lead and she supports, and then vice versa. And it was just one of the times where I was leading and she was supporting in the way that only she could during that period.

SPEAKER_04 26:23

Oh, I actually love that. It reminds me even when I was looking on social media this morning, Lockie, which we try not to do too much, and there was actually a post saying the biggest life hack is choosing an exceptional person to marry, you know, like that is the biggest thing. Like you look at what you want to be able to do and achieve in life and the impact that you want to create. Because it, yes, it was an adventure for you, Lockie, but I think even listening to it, it's like Amy knew that it was so much more than that what you were trying to do and put yourself out and achieve. And so you were going through it together, but there is still a cost of achievement. And I think it's a very real thing to be able to talk about that anything that feels outside of your comfort zone, anything that feels like it's brand new, it's unfamiliar, it's something that you haven't done before, there is going to be things that you are gonna have to say no to, like talking about being in Nashville and not staying out and drinking and all that sort of stuff. It's part of it. You know, I it even made me think, Lockie, it was a couple of months ago, last month, everything's a blur. Why do I keep doing this trying to get particular? It doesn't matter. But I was emceeing a conference in Canberra, and it was over three days, I think it was, and there was about 400 people at this conference, and I love that sort of stuff. Lockie, give me a microphone for a couple of days. Like I'm in my happy place. Like, that's just awesome. But it just it started, and I did like the welcome drinks, and I was making sure everyone was excited about the next couple of days, and the amount of people that came up to me and they were like, we don't know how you're gonna do this for the next couple of days. Like, how do you be on? How are you gonna give this energy for the whole like then you've got the gala night at the end, and I was like, it's gonna be amazing, this is great. But also at 7:30, see you later, peace out, I'm going to bed. Like, I have to, I can't stay out with them all. I can't keep talking crap. I've got to go home, I've got to have something healthy before I go to bed, I've got to sleep, I've got to leave early, you know, get there, all that sort of stuff, because the cost of it for me is looking after myself, making sure that I I can bring the energy that I have. But that's that's important for me, you know. So with everything that feels big, especially for other people, there is a certain cost that some people are willing to go, sure, I'd do that, and some people are going, no, thanks, I wouldn't do it. And that's the difference, right?

SPEAKER_01 28:29

And the another important thing that I'll share was that the people who don't or wouldn't do it are sometimes, especially on social media, the loudest people to comment on things. So Amy and I didn't talk about it while we're going through it, but since then we've obviously it's part of the documentary and part of our story, we've spoken about it, and I've been called every name under the sun because and I I probably would have called myself those names because I'm like, mate, what you're doing doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things of family, but we went through that and and we had all the conversations behind closed doors before we even decided to do it, and so we knew what the consequences would be in the time apart and the sacrifices and everything, and we were okay with that, but some people never understand that, and that's one of the hardest things of going after what you want in whatever way, shape, or form that looks like people won't understand. Some people will try to understand and they'll support you, other people will just sit there neutrally and they won't do or say anything, which is fine, and then there'll be the people who don't want to understand, and they will make you a lot or try to make you understand that you're doing a bad thing. Yeah, and that's what holds a lot of people back from taking the risks and doing the things that they want to do, whatever that looks like for them. And it breaks my heart because ultimately, yeah, it's sucked. And no, you know, I'm not one of those people who says, I don't care what people think about me. I do care what people think about me. I just choose to ignore it from time after you know over time.

SPEAKER_04 30:03

Yeah, absolutely. That would have been massive. But like you sort of said, you and you and Amy knew what you were doing, you felt really good about it. However, that doesn't make you absolutely bulletproof with all the other stuff that gets thrown at you, right? Like that that can be really difficult. And I I like how you actually said it, that it can come from very different places, like people who are just like, I would never do that, people who don't agree with it, all other bits and pieces. But you also talk a lot about um people who are surviving well but living small. And I love this, Lockie, because I I completely agree. Like, if I'm honest, it's probably one of my biggest fears and something that probably upsets me the most is feeling like people are staying in comfort for fear of discomfort, even if discomfort would actually give them a way better life, right? Like I see that so much, which is why it's the work that I do, which is with teams, because I I worked in corporate for 15 years before I started my own business. But it's really about shaking people up to realize that even if you are working a nine to five, you can live these incredible lives. But like you actually say, there are people who are just surviving really well, but they are living really small. How do you actually spot someone who you think is surviving well but living small? Like, what do you sort of see?

SPEAKER_01 31:15

It's I think it purely comes from conversation. You can tell the difference between someone who's genuinely pumped and like take yourself, for example. You've got a very awesome energy, and like when you're talking about things, you can tell there's passion and excitement. Then you can talk to Johnny down the road, who maybe is in a great career, has a beautiful family, but you go, mate, what are you most excited about right now? He doesn't have an answer, and just the way that he's talking, you're like, mate, I don't know whether I would rather be in this conversation or watching paint dry right now. I just don't know. So that's how I I can tell because people we set our lives up, and it doesn't matter whether you run your own business or nine to five, whatever works, works because you can still make an amazing life. Not everyone's meant to have a business, and not everyone's meant to do nine to five. But if I look at a nine to fiver, they can have the most, you know, love what they do, but get so pumped because they have the structure and the stability to then do what they want after hours and before hours and live a freaking awesome life. Because I I don't believe the quality of your life is by how much money you earn or how much status you have or how everyone views you. It's like how you view yourself and what's going on in your head. So if you're stressed all the time, quality of your life is stress. But if you're excited all the time, like I am, like I look at my calendar, I got a big calendar just up here, and I've got stickers for different things, and I see all the cool shit coming up. And a lot of it's not work-related for everyone. It's like stuff that wouldn't probably excite half the people on the planet, maybe 99%. But for me, it gets me amped up. Like I get so excited because I survive well, I could earn more money if I wanted to, but to me, what living big is like building a life where I actually am in control of everything that's happening.

SPEAKER_02 33:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:05

And so to answer your question, the first thing is you can tell by asking a question, what are you most excited about? And if people can't answer that, I would instantly go, well, they're not being pushed, they're not being challenged, they're just going through the motions. You can also see by routine. Like if people go, um, I go, well, when was your last date night? I don't do those. Okay, well, when was your last mate's trip? Definitely not those. When was the last time you took yourself on a just out for lunch? Never. What about anything? Anything out of the unordinary? Nah. It just don't have time. Well, that's the problem. It doesn't need to you've everyone on this would have heard about bucket lists. I also have mini bucket lists. Mini bucket lists is essentially fun things that you want to experience that you can do with little to no time and little to no money, but it's just something different because you're going to give yourself a new experience. And I think if we can start giving people that, that's going back to a decade ago with the charity event. It gets bigger and bigger and bigger because you want more of those things once you see what you're capable of. My screen just disappeared. Then I was like, I hope my have my computer hasn't crashed, but we're here. Um so that's that's what I would look at it. But I would love to hear from you, Candace, around you obviously did 15 years corporate and now have your own business. So was there an element for yourself where you felt like you were you know surviving well but living small?

SPEAKER_04 34:34

Yeah, 100%. When you were just talking about conversation, I was like, oh, I know, I know I'm excited with life now. Like I love what I get to do. I love the way that my life is set up and the variety that I, you know, what I like I was saying, MCing and running workshops and delivering keynotes, but the impact that I get to have on people. I was actually just posting about it this morning, Lockie, where I was running a workshop in Rocky on Friday, and this lady came up to me at the end and she just was buzzing. She just loved the session, she was so excited by it, and she just said, in 20 years' time, Candace, I want to be like you. I was like, holy shit, how old am I? In 20 years' time. Like I appreciate it, it was lovely, and she was excited. And I was like, Yep, you're 20 and I'm 40. That that adds up. That absolutely adds up.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Like the math is mathing.

SPEAKER_04 35:22

But it was so great because she was early 20s and she was so pumped. And you know, I think about where I was in my early 20s, and I was living in London, I was drinking way too much, having a great time, like visiting a lot of places that I can't even remember, but you know, having a great time. Um but I was working in HR, and I think that throughout my probably my entire 15-year HR career, even though I lived in Houston, Texas, and I was in London, like I had a great career on paper. I was never super pumped, you know, Lockie. And that was my biggest thing because when I was in corporate, there was no one sort of teaching me the stuff that I now get to teach teams, where it's, you know, this is in your control. Like I think so often when people are in corporate, they think it's up to their boss to make their life better. They think it's, you know, hopefully the annoying colleague David will be made redundant soon, and then Monday to Friday will be better if David's gone, you know. We just blame all these things that's outside of us when really we've got to learn ourselves, like, what is it that makes us happy? What am I doing for fun? Like you were saying, Lockie, you know, and I I wasn't doing enough when I was, you know, being a HR manager, managing a national team, doing all the things that I wanted to do, but I definitely wasn't lit up because I didn't know how to be almost. So now it becomes that thing where I know how to be and I want to be able to give that back. But also doing the things that you were saying, where it's like the date nights and the spending time with girlfriends and all that sort of stuff, it actually takes effort, right? Like it takes effort. And so often people just end up not doing it and they'll just, you know, binge the latest episode of whatever's on Netflix because that just feels easier than actually, you know, getting dressed up and washing your hair and going out. Like people just can't be asked anymore. But it is such a reflection of how they answer the conversation of how are you? Like the moment you and I spoke today, and I was like, How are you going? You were like, I'm so great. I'm so great. And that's what you want to be able to hear. I'm like, I want to keep Yeah. It's like I want to keep talking to you, as opposed to someone who's like, oh, it's Monday again, you know, which is probably how I used to answer it. You know, where you've got your Monday itis and all your other stuff. So I think the way that you said it, it's the conversations that you have with people where you can tell, are they living a great life or are they living just a an okay life and just surviving? And we don't want to get to the end. And this is why I sort of started my business. One of the million reasons why I do what I do is I don't want myself or anyone that I know to get to the end of their life and go, I wish I did this. I wish I gave it more, I wish I was brave enough, I wish I was bold enough, you know, as opposed to just, well, this is as good as it gets, because that's not the case.

SPEAKER_01 37:55

Exactly. And there's so much evidence. Like anyone who wants evidence that you're more than likely going to get to the end of your life and have those questions. The book from uh Bronnie War, have you read that? My favorite book. I read it every year, Lockie.

SPEAKER_04 38:12

Every year. Every year.

SPEAKER_01 38:14

Love it. Everyone should read it. And I remember reading it, and I was thinking, what makes me think that I'm so bloody good that I would be any different to these people?

SPEAKER_02 38:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

Right? So therefore I go, they've said this, this, and this, and this. I'm gonna make sure I do this, this, and this, and this, and I'm gonna schedule time to do those things. And it's hard, yeah, but it's so freaking fulfilling, and over time it gets easier. But it it's the reason why I do the work I do, but with men, because I see a lot of men who have created something incredible, they've got the status, they've got the title, they've got the money, but that has come at the consequence of the life they thought that would create. Their wife doesn't love them anymore, their children don't ask for them, they don't have buddies to pick up the phone and go do fun things with. And that breaks my heart, man. I I like I can't think of anything worse. And I I think like it for me, it's like when I do the fitness things, it's an invitation for blokes. Like a lot of men, genuine and this is stereotyping, but the men that I I generally work with love sports. Sport's an invitation to get together. So if I can create those with a bit of a backbone around how we can make your whole life better, then you're gonna then have that ripple effect because Candace, as you said, there are people sitting on the sidelines who maybe would get excited about the things that you and I are talking about, they just don't have the confidence yet or the what are the next steps? And that's why I love bringing people together and the work that you do is so important because when someone is sitting in a room and they've got these questions that you're about to answer, and then they can go, I'm gonna DM Candace, or I'm gonna DM Lockie, or I'm gonna go for a run with Lockie. That's gonna be the first step for me to create a whole new life. My life changed. I went to that conference which I told you about in 2014. There was a guy on stage who changed my life. He doesn't even know it. Changed my life. I remember sitting there with this fire in my belly going to my mum, and I brought mum with me everywhere back then. She was my safety blanket as a 21-year-old dropkick. I was I said to Mum, I was like, I want to do what he's doing. I have no idea what it is, but I feel fired up for the first time outside of sport, and that's why I read the books, that's why I did the things, because I knew I wasn't the kind of person that could deliver that yet, but I could if I just did the work.

SPEAKER_03 40:34

I love that.

SPEAKER_01 40:35

And I hope for everyone, I absolutely hope, as you do, Ken, is like at the end of every week, at the end of every day, when someone puts their head on the pillow, they're just freaking pumped for the experiences that they got to have today. And if you didn't start making some change, just one change, one change a day for that one win that we've spoken about, right? Like that's all it needs to be.

SPEAKER_04 40:58

Yeah, I love that. And it can, it's it's funny that sort of like you listen to what you've just said, and it's like, that sounds easy. That sounds totally doable. And it's it's how I live my life, and I I make a big thing going, fun doesn't come naturally to Candice Harvey, as weird as it would be. Like people look at me and go, you look like you're so much fun because I schedule it, which sounds so unsexy, right? To sort of think like in order to have fun, I put it in my calendar. But I do, you know, and I have conversations with my husband where I'm like, we need to do something. Like we've got our anniversary coming up, we might we like to go camping, and even though our house is not out of boxes just yet, he looks at me like I've got two heads, like, can you just chill out a little bit? But we we don't want to get to the end of the week or the month and just be like, all we did was unpack boxes. Like that's not the life, you know. So you've got to be able to think about what would make this a little bit better and put the effort in, which I think is really, really important, Lockie, like you just said. But even for someone in a nine to five, I just want to go back to this because I know that you do work with men, and I'm sure this has been something that's popped up a little bit as well for you, that they are working in a nine to five and they sometimes feel like there's only so much that they're in control of, right? Like it's like I've got I've got to be at work at this time and I finish at this time, and it's it's a lot easier for people who maybe have businesses, all that sort of stuff. But if they are wanting to do something different but still staying in the nine to five, what do you feel is the cost of that? Like, what do they actually have to give up as nine to fivers to live a bigger life?

SPEAKER_01 42:26

It's a very good question. For me, if I'm looking at how do I live a bigger life, you need to grab it by the horns. And that ultimately goes back to the unsexy thing you said before is scheduling it. I look at, you know, even as a business owner, I still try to give myself specific hours now with a young son because if I was as fluid as I used to be, Amy's like, well, when can you look after Freddie or whatever? So I do eight till three. Yeah, and so I have to make my training times around that and times with Freddie and family around that. So technically I'm a my own nine to five in my own way. Yeah, and so what that looks like is what helps me set my data for success. What are the experiences that I want to have? So prior to being a dad, Candace, mine was I get up and train with my mates and I'd go for a coffee and a sauna and I'd hang out with Amy for a little bit and then I'd get into the workday. Now I take my son for a 90-minute walk every morning. It's the best thing in my life. I don't do any of the other stuff anymore. I say no to my mates. But that to me is the most rewarding thing. But I don't dog my mates anymore. I just go every Friday morning, I'll make that um commitment to catching up with you guys. Tuesday night's date night, Sunday's family day. I have no social media on. And so I have all of these things scheduled and I have them in the calendar with my wife on a shared calendar, and I have them on stickers on my big 12 month calendar. I'm pointing at this 12 month calendar, so that at the end of the year I can look back and go, these are all the small moments, but they made a great big life. And you could also do it, I don't know where my phone is, but you could also. Do it by going back through your camera roll and go, Well, does it mat moments that I've captured, does that excite me? Because it doesn't matter. Like I'm still doing the H or three, and there's things in at work that sometimes I get frustrated with, and things that are out of my control if a speaking gig falls through, or whatever it may be. Um, but it's the moments outside of that that we have to be very intentional in for uh living a bigger life. Even just, you know, I've got green dots here, and every quarter I have a three-day weekend with my mates, and so it's generally just uh Friday, Saturday, Sunday, or I've got one in August, which is Saturday, Sunday, Monday. And we schedule that with the boys in advance. So we go on midge point fishing soon, which would be epic. Um, but I know that I'm gonna have four great trips with my friends, and if I do that every year over the next decade, that's 40 trips with my mates. Yeah, and so they're the things that I think about, regardless, you know, if you're in a nine to five, you can still do those things. But if you just go through the motion where it's like, oh, wake up, I've gotta drag myself to work, I've gotta do this, I've got a few invoices, and uh, as you said, Dave, I've got to have that small buddy hallway conversation with him, which I just dread. He's such a miserable bastard. And then I'm gonna roll home with no energy, and I'm just gonna bring that poor attitude to my family, and it's just like groundhog day every day. No, change it.

SPEAKER_04 45:29

Yeah, and get really clear on what it is that that excites you, right? Like, I think that's especially like as you're talking, Lockie, I'm thinking about my husband as well and what he likes to do. One of the biggest reasons we moved to the Sunshine Coast is because he loves riding dirt bikes, that's his his thing, and being in the Sunshine Coast with the mountains, like glasshouse mountains, it makes it, and he works a nine to five, so it makes it really easy for him to finish work, go for a ride, and it becomes his therapy, like he goes with some guys and they have a really great time doing that. But it's like making life easier to do the things that you love to do. I'm not saying everyone has to move to closer to be where their hobbies are, but you want to get really clear on like what is it that does make life exciting? Because you know, I say this a lot in my workshops too. I want everyone to be able to get to the end of the year, and when they're talking at Christmas about their year, I don't want it to be like it was just busy. You know, like it actually makes me feel a little bit sick when you hear that. It's like that is the most boring B word ever, right? Where it's like, it's just been busy. Like you're not telling me anything, it doesn't make me want to be your friend. Like it's just, it's boring, right? So you want to be able to say that, you know, either we went dirt bike riding or every couple of months I had a long weekend with the boys or whatever it is, but it's up to you to get clear on what does an exciting year look like for you outside of your nine to five and scheduling in with your cute little dots like Lockie does or stars on your board and make it a I love how you just keep looking up at your board. It's like it's this, oh like it makes you so happy to look at your book. It's the holy grail. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 46:54

And if I if I tick that off, that is a like the the thing that I would say to everyone like literally do it and map it out. Think of all the cool things you could do, but also don't neglect your family and just do all lads trips. Like do think about the experience. You might sit down with your your partner and say, What do if we could do two to three things this year, what what does that look like? Yeah, and once again, these are sort of bigger events, but you can do lots of small things. And if I frame this year, like this is the last three years for me have just been frickin' wild. Yeah. And it's only gonna get bigger and better, but that's by choice. It's purely by choice.

SPEAKER_04 47:29

So that was a really great segue for my last question that I wanted to ask you, Lockie, as well. Final question. Um, because I want to know what your bigger life looks like right now, like for you, right? So, like I was actually just saying before, I'm reading Robin Sharmer's um book, The Wealth Money Can't Buy. Have you read that book? The Wealth Money Can't Buy? I feel like you would No, I haven't, no. I feel like you'd love it.

SPEAKER_01 47:50

I feel like I should read that.

SPEAKER_04 47:51

Yeah, and it's like really short chapters, which I appreciate, Robin. You know what I mean? Like where he's just done it really short, and so you feel like you're achieving something when you read it. Oh God, it's so good. Um but he actually talks about your richest life, and he's not talking about money. So it's right up your alley what you were talking about. Um, but I think that when we, you know, even for me, if I think about a bigger life right now, it is really about creating and making time to work on myself. Like that's really important for me at this stage in my business. It's like what I was talking about when I was emceeing that conference. If I'm not doing that and I'm pouring from an empty cup, it's just I'm useless, right? So it's really important for me to make time for myself. But I think even a bigger life right now for me looks like being bolder than I ever have been before. You know, asking for the big gigs, like the stages that I used to look at and think, oh, that's not really for me just yet. But now I get in contact, I send emails, like it's like how I was with you when I wanted you on my podcast. I DM'd you, you said yes, then you went quiet, and then I went again and you were still quiet. And I was like, he hasn't said no. So I'm just gonna keep going and going. And you were you knew you're just like, yeah, I'll get to you in a second, Ken. Can I be honest?

SPEAKER_01 48:55

Can I be honest? I don't actually check my social media that much. There we go, everyone. I just social media.

SPEAKER_04 49:03

You're not well, you're too busy and important now, aren't you?

SPEAKER_03 49:05

You're too busy and important.

SPEAKER_01 49:08

I just block my time. I've got this beautiful device on the fridge called a brick. Have you heard of them? No. But they essentially make your phone a dumb phone. You scan it and you can't unlock. You know how with screen time on your phone, yeah, you can always go, yeah, I'll give myself another 10 minutes or whatever. I just have that on schedule all day. Literally, I have a I think a 90-minute window in the morning, and then the afternoon I have a two-hour window, then the weekends it's blocked. Saturday, it's free. Because I just realized how much of my life I was wasting and I was comparing, and I didn't feel like I was doing enough. And so for me, I just schedule all my social media content. I'll check it when the window opens and if I got a comment on anything. And aside from that, I get yeah, a lot of messages, but I'm like, people will find me if they need to find me. Like there's a website and things like that. They will keep going, like Candace Lovey did.

SPEAKER_04 49:57

She just kept going and going, and eventually you answered, which was really nice. But I think it I don't think and the thing that I wanted to sort of say with that is I don't think I would have done that in the past, Loki, right? Like I wasn't like that. I would sort of ask someone once, and if they said nothing because they blocked their phone and they're, you know, focusing on other things like you were, I'd be like, oh well, he doesn't want to talk to me. On to the next person. Where I was like, that was actually a real small way of living. So it's not the way I am now. I literally, if something that I wanted, I keep going after it. Like I keep asking, I keep knocking on those doors and keep checking, and I actually love the results that I'm getting from that. And it does take a little bit of, you know, bravery. It does take a little bit of, I'm not being annoying, I really think there's some impact here. But that is the bigger life for me is really getting clear on what is it that I want and then go get it, you know, like really shooting my shot anyway. So I would love to hear from you. What does your bigger life look like right now for you, Lochland Stewart?

SPEAKER_01 50:54

Mine is exactly that. And it's funny, I got asked this at our Sydney premiere the other night having become a dad. And for me, the most important thing is I don't, and I want to make sure I use my words correctly, I don't want to put my life on hold now that I have a son. What I mean by that is a lot of people then stop doing all the things that they had always done because they're now a parent. I'm still gonna be the best dad that I can be and the best husband that I can be, but I want to show that my son that you gotta still chase the things that are important to you. I want my son not to just hear me say chase your dreams. I want him to see me doing that. I want him to see everything that happens. And to your point, like I go bold. Like, if I if there's things that I want, I work my ass off to make that a reality. It's how we went from guys who three years ago we didn't even have a single sponsor to make the 58 marathons reality, and now our documentary has been viewed by people, you know, a lot of great stuff's happening, and I pinch myself. But I can turn around to my son and go, like, I did all of this and I didn't sacrifice being a great dad, and I didn't sacrifice being a great husband, and I didn't sacrifice being a great mate. Like, that is to me what living a big life is because how often do you hear it where everyone goes, if I need to be successful in that, I gotta just burn the boats. It kind of makes sense, but if you're gonna burn the boats and when you get that thing and you don't have the other things that you think you want, that's not really the right boats to burn, is it? So I think it's so important to you know keep chasing my life, and I don't want to put my life on hold. I want to bring my bring all the things that are important to me to make my life as big as humanly fucking possible.

SPEAKER_04 52:37

Oh, I love that.

SPEAKER_01 52:38

And I don't even know where that's gonna take me.

SPEAKER_04 52:40

But how good how good's that though? Like you have no idea. It's like let's just keep making it bigger and bigger. But does that mean that you don't agree with the quote? Hang on, I'm probably gonna butcher it, but it's um you can have everything, but you can't have it all at once. Do you not agree with that then?

SPEAKER_01 52:56

I have thought about that as well. I think there's moments where you have to. I look at it like an umbrella. This was how I justified it to myself a number of years ago. An umbrella has the key point and then it has beads off the side of it, which I would say are the other things in life. I think it's important that you have to have some level of maintenance to bring everything with you because if you completely neglect it, you won't have it when you need it. So, for example, uh a real life case. When I started my business, I worked from 5 a.m. till no joke, 10 p.m. under the stairs, and Amy's like Dobby or Harry Potter, and I was cold calling people. I was in sales at the time, and Amy didn't like me. I was at a barbecue one day, and all my friends were talking about rugby league, and I love rugby league, but I just didn't know what was going on. This had been a two-year thing, and I realized I'd burnt the boats to try and build a business, and my business was growing, my mates didn't invite me anywhere. I don't know why Amy stayed with me. That that blows my mind, and I wasn't even exercising, and so that's when I I love to push back on that. I think you can have it all, but there's gonna be certain things that you want to have leaps, and there's gonna be other things where you're just having steps, and so that's where to me it comes back to the calendar and scheduling things. If I look at my calendar, I know that there's time for all the things that are important, sometimes it's more significant, other times not. And the better I get at things and the more efficient, the bigger the leap can be. And so now, for example, when I you know, I didn't get a single shoe sponsor, right? Didn't get it uh any of that. I would have thought shoe sponsors would have been throwing shoes at me. Now, now because of what we've done and because of the documentary success and the book success, I'm getting a lot of offers, and now I get to say no to other people, which is quite nice. And so when you focus on achieving things, things do get easier over time, but it becomes harder because you've got to be selective, if that makes sense. So I don't know whether that answers your code question. I I just think it does.

SPEAKER_03 55:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 55:03

No, I I yeah, I I think you can have it all, but you can't grow them all astronomically quick at the same time.

SPEAKER_04 55:10

I sort of I picture it the way you're saying it as well. It's like you've just still got to know what is most important, like obviously time with your your spouse, with friends, looking after yourself, and then everything else might, you know, peek and trough as it is, but there are certain things that have to stay really solid at all times in order for you to be doing what you want to do. I love that.

SPEAKER_01 55:30

Just and just quickly, do you think that we overcomplicate things? I have had this thought in life that the reason why I wasn't successful in things is was it was harder than it should have been. And I was like, I've got to go figure out all these million other things before I can do the thing that needs to be done to get the result. Whereas now I just look at anything, even learning the guitar, I'm like, I can do that. I just gotta start here and do that and then learn. Rather than so that whole analysis by paralysis that we get into, and I think that's why a lot of people don't think that they can earn a lot of money, yeah, be great husbands, do all the the things at once.

SPEAKER_04 56:07

Yeah, it's what I was saying before. It's like when people look at you, they're like, I can't be like Lockie, I can't run 58 marathons. It's like, no, it's not about that. Like, I I re- and I say this a lot in the work that I do, Lockie too, where it's like we as humans, male and female, we overcomplicate the shit out of life with everything, you know, and the biggest thing in the work that I do is I I talk about shaking people up, like shake up your thinking, because if we're if we're thinking differently, then you're behaving differently. If you're behaving differently, you're getting different results. And I wrote a book that came out early this year called The Shake Up, my podcast, The Shake Up. You're picking this up.

SPEAKER_00 56:36

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_04 56:38

But the whole idea with the book is that it's 24 chapters of different areas of people's life that every now and again needs a shakeup, right? So it's your intimacy needs a shakeup, the way that you communicate needs a shake up, your bravery needs a shakeup, your friendships need a shake up. And so often what is stopping people is they're like, I don't know how, or it's gonna take too long, or you know, this isn't the right time, and they think that it's gonna be this massive thing to, for example, shake up their communication. And in the book, at the end of every chapter, small chapters, right, Lockie, because I've my attention spam, we like small chapters, but it's the actual steps of how to do that. And sometimes the steps are like three things, and it's like you have time, you can absolutely shake up that area of you if you want to. We don't have to think that in order to shake up my communication, it's gonna take years and this mammoth plan to do it, and then I'm gonna be like Candace Harvey, who can talk underwater. No, it's like three steps off your top, you know, like you can do that thing. But we do, I I really do think that we overcomplicate so much and it stops us from living an incredible life because we think it's so much bigger than it actually has to be. We just have to start, take action.

SPEAKER_01 57:43

I love that. It's simple, it's simple, it's simple.

SPEAKER_04 57:46

You know, I was when I started my business locky, I was gonna call myself a simple coach, and I was like, I don't know if that's good marketing, you know what I mean? Like just come and work with me. I'm a simple coach. But I like I like to pride myself on simplifying stuff for people so that they exhale, you know, because our heads, we just they're so full of like how hard things are, and it doesn't have to be, it's just that next step. Simple.

SPEAKER_00 58:12

Oh the simple coach.

SPEAKER_04 58:14

Don't tell your friends that are. Yeah, I just had a chat with Candace. She wants to call herself the simple coach. No, don't do that. I'll get no work ever, no work. But Lockie, thank you so much for coming on the Shake Up Podcast. I am so glad I continue to pester you, even though I know you don't check social media that often. But I'm glad I finally got you here. You are so full of knowledge, inspiration. The work that you are doing is truly phenomenal. So please continue to do this work that you're doing, which I know that you will. Um, you're amazing. And I can't wait to keep track of you and hopefully we can catch up in real life one day. That would be absolutely awesome.

SPEAKER_01 58:53

I I'm sure we're gonna be at a conference together. I can I can I'm putting that out there. We're gonna be shaking it up at a conference together. But I appreciate all the work you're doing as well. I think it's so necessary and needed, and I know that every, you know, I was gonna say boardroom room that you walk into, you're gonna light it up and change some lives. And I get fired up about that. As I've said, my cheeks are hurting from like smiling so much. Not that I don't smile everyone, I do smile, but this is intense smiling right now because it's good energy. But thank you for having me on the Shake It Up podcast.

SPEAKER_04 59:26

Thank you, Lockie. Appreciate you.