Let That Shift Go
Welcome to "Let That Shift Go," a podcast hosted by siblings Lena and Noel. Join them on their journey of self-awareness as they delve into meaningful conversations about the human experience.
Lena and Noel have decided to break free from the confines of private discussions and bring their heartfelt, and at times, humorous conversations to the public. They believe that we are all going through the trials and tribulations of life, and it's comforting to know that we're not alone.
In each episode, Lena and Noel will explore various aspects of being human, sharing personal stories, insights, and lessons they've learned along the way. From navigating relationships to dealing with challenges, they'll offer a refreshing perspective on life's ups and downs.
Through candid and authentic conversations, "Let That Shift Go" aims to create a safe space for listeners to relate, reflect, and find solace in the shared human experience. Lena and Noel invite you to join them as they embrace change, growth, and let go of what no longer serves them.
Tune in and be part of a community that celebrates the beautiful messiness of being human. Get ready to let go, laugh, and discover that you're not alone on this journey. Welcome to "Let That Shift Go" podcast!
Let That Shift Go
The Real Plot Twist? "You're Not A Victim!"
We explore the transformative shift from victimhood to radical responsibility and how honesty with ourselves can change our relationships.
• Looking at what triggers our emotional reactions and getting curious about their source
• Recognizing when we're parenting from performance anxiety rather than genuine connection
• Understanding the subtle ways we deceive ourselves with phrases like "I'm fine" or "I'm just a people-pleaser"
• Learning what it truly means to hold space for others without inserting ourselves
• Practicing radical responsibility by owning how we relate to situations, not just what happens to us
• Identifying old stories we tell ourselves that no longer match who we're becoming
• Taking time to pause when triggered rather than responding from old patterns
• Using breathwork to integrate radical responsibility and release old emotions
Join us next time when we talk about radical forgiveness. Let us know your questions on Instagram at Let that Shift Go or visit our website, serenitycovetomecula.com.
Hello and welcome to the Let that Shift Go podcast. I'm Noelle.
Speaker 2:And I'm Lina.
Speaker 1:And this is where we talk about the good, the bad and all the shift in between.
Speaker 2:We just talk mad shift.
Speaker 1:Let's get into it and on this week's episode, the real plot twist you're not actually a victim.
Speaker 2:Radical honesty Because, respectfully, it was me the whole time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it probably was.
Speaker 2:It is, it is, it definitely is.
Speaker 1:All right, let's get into these skin deep cards. You want to go first?
Speaker 2:I'll go first, all right. What do people most misunderstand about you?
Speaker 1:Hmm, what do they most misunderstand about me? Gosh, I don't know. I think it would have to be the actual mood I'm in, I guess.
Speaker 2:Oh, how so.
Speaker 1:Uh I don't know.
Speaker 2:Like you seem one way.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because I think I've always been so uh good at kind of masking, so, um, you know, and extreme radical honesty is like it is my fault that because I I mask it really well. So I feel like I've been misunderstood but it's been my fault the whole time.
Speaker 2:What are you masking? And then, what does it look like?
Speaker 1:I don't know, like if I was. I mean, when you see somebody, he's like oh I'm fine, right Feelings I've not expressed Right, so like I'm just like good or you know, whatever. I'm just not really being authentic, I guess.
Speaker 2:Well, how does?
Speaker 1:that lead to a misunderstanding about you.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, I think they think you're stronger than you are Probably Okay.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, exactly Because that's probably a universal I've got it all together.
Speaker 2:I'm good, I have that under control.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think a lot of people say that about me and I think dad said that about me one time. You know, I had a discussion. He's like well, I never really helped you because you always had it taken care of, you were always, yeah, I felt like you were, you had it, you had it under control. So I never helped and I was like dude, you misunderstand, I needed the most help. You know what I mean. But I, in a lot of ways, um, I kind of masked it, so, so, but that's where I feel I've been misunderstood.
Speaker 2:All right. Well, that was actually a good question for this episode. Okay, so what's yours?
Speaker 1:Okay, so mine is if we were isolated alone for a year, what about me? Do you think would drive you crazy?
Speaker 2:Man Radical honesty Well okay, I love going into deep conversations, but you can go to a level of depth that is like, okay, that's it, I can't go anymore.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, okay. I can see that that's true. You know what I'm saying. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Like I'm glad we get to do this. This is one of the reasons why we do it is because we go into these very deep conversations, that that tangle and untangle and go and go and go and I imagine us on an Island for a year. I think I would be like I can't shut up, like I can't anymore. I need like I can't see you for like six hours and then I'm going to go and then we'll get started again.
Speaker 1:I feel like this is why you manifested this podcast. It was limited to 30 to 40 minutes at the most.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but people don't know that we're actually here talking for like three hours.
Speaker 1:Yeah, before and after. Before and after, yeah, yeah, so it's.
Speaker 2:It's both like the reason I would want to be stranded with you and the reason I wouldn't want to be stranded with you. Okay, I can get down with that. I appreciate your honesty. That's just me being honest, all right.
Speaker 1:So let's get into this topic. What brought this topic up to you?
Speaker 2:Well, recently I was talking to a mom and we were talking and she was really struggling with her 12-year-old daughter and she kept saying like she's so rude. She talks back and she has really struggling with her 12 year old daughter and she kept saying like she's so rude. You know, she talks back and she has no respect for me and listen, I can relate right, that's a common one, it's especially 12 years old I mean, or you know, teenage years.
Speaker 2:I've had to. I have two grown women, daughters, and so I've been through different parts of that of raising them. But of course, you know, I'm a little more detached and so I just got really curious, as I do, and I just asked her like what does respect look like to you? And she just you sort of paused for a minute and then she said obedience and like it's doing what I say the first time and it's not embarrassing me in public.
Speaker 1:All things I've said.
Speaker 2:And all things I have felt. Right yeah. And she. But then she paused and you know, I think it hit her that she was parenting from like presence. She wasn't parenting from presence, she was actually parenting from like performance anxiety. Oh, okay. Like it was. It was more the fear of looking like a bad mom or like she wasn't doing a good job and really from old programming.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like other people are judging, like if you're in a, you know. I know one thing I said was, if my kid was on a plane, he would never act like that. Well, guess what? My kid definitely had a plan of his own.
Speaker 2:For sure, and you know my kids, they're kids, they are they. You know they shouldn't always have to be in control of their emotions. That means that they're probably suppressing something. I mean, I feel that now, but when I was a parent, you know, raising young children, that wasn't the first thought. A lot of it was.
Speaker 2:You know I didn't want to look like a bad mom and that it was a reflection of her worth you know, and oftentimes, as parents, we see our children's you know, behavior as a reflection of our worthiness as a parent, and so that's when it's like she had this quiet moment, really, of this radical honesty and she said something like I think I'm just more focused on controlling her behavior than understanding her experience. Oh wow, and I'm afraid. What did she say?
Speaker 2:I'm afraid if I don't control her, people will think I failed and I was like wow, that was a moment of just like stopping the loop in your head and really thinking about what you had just said and what does that actually mean? And that was her shift. It was, like you know, really going from control to connection, or from you know, parenting for others. Approval.
Speaker 1:I wish I could have, you know, been in a moment like that of like extreme vulnerability, radical honesty, I guess, right and just been like wow, why am I saying I wish they listened the first time?
Speaker 2:Oh, and how many times did you know, we say I've said that like listen to me the first time where we count one, two, if I get to three, and it's like, yeah, sometimes you just need sanity. But it's really looking at like why am I doing this and why does it bother me so much? Because you can feel you know like how people feel when their kids are acting up. They look around like what are people going to think of my child? And that's a direct reflection of what kind of parent I am. Like what?
Speaker 2:are people going to think of my child, and that's a direct reflection of what kind of parent I am. So for her, it was realizing that she was really parenting from a perspective of what other people would think about her child and therefore what they would think about her instead of, you know, parenting for a real relationship. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So that's not to say, you know the kids are, they're just going to run amok, whatever. But, it's just really looking at, in all situations, what is the motivation for doing what you do, or for perpetuating a situation or staying in a relationship way too long or doing a job you hate. When you get really honest with yourself, what is your motivation for doing things? And I don't think many of us really stop and take a moment to get really honest with ourselves.
Speaker 1:Well, I mean, even in that direct example, I have to ask myself in that situation I've done and I was just thinking to myself like I never asked myself why am I so angry about, like such a minimal? Thing, you know, and it's because of the disrespect or all those other stories in programming that I've had, yeah, in there. But to take the time to ask like, why am I so? Yeah you know, angry in that moment and to take responsibility, that was. That's a pretty big step it's like owning your reactions.
Speaker 2:You know and that's one thing we, you know, we talk about a lot is just whenever you feel activated or triggered is really start to get curious about what that is. I think that that can really lead to some radical honesty.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because that's like literally the definition, the practice of owning your reactions, your patterns, your projections, without shame but with clarity, yeah, without shame. Without shame. That's the well. They had to add that one in there without the shame. Yeah, I know, because I think that's the boy. They had to add that one in there without the shame.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because I think that's the trigger within me. You know, like, say, you're in a situation where, like, other people around you are going to be judging, like you know, like a parenting situation like that, and that is what happens. Like, oh, I start to think all these people are thinking I don't, I'm not a good parent, I don't have it under control, my kid's a bad kid. All of these things, probably nobody's avoiding shame, yeah. But it's all in my head.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, they're probably not thinking much about you, you're thinking more about it. Yeah, there's a. There's a lot of like, different examples of like the subtle self deceit, cause that's really what we're looking at is like how are you, what are you, how are you like? That subtle self-deceit is. How are you lying to yourself? Yeah, you know and will you hear people say things like I'm just a people, pleaser, yeah right, what are they really saying?
Speaker 2:I'm codependent I avoid conflict and discomfort. Well, that's me, yeah. Yeah, I mean most people. When you're trying to just make sure everyone's okay, you're really trying to avoid, you know, conflict or feeling uncomfortable because someone's not happy.
Speaker 1:So you'll you know, to your own detriment. I like you just deciphered, like when people say something to you you go. This means okay.
Speaker 2:I find myself doing that a lot.
Speaker 1:Okay. Or how about when, like when you were talking?
Speaker 2:about. You know how people misunderstand you and you say things like I'm fine, I'm fine. What is he really saying?
Speaker 1:I'm numb and I don't know how to name my feelings yet. Yeah, that's probably pretty accurate.
Speaker 2:You know it would be too hard for me to name these feelings. So I'm fine. Please move on. You're not fine. You're lying to yourself. You're not fine. I've yet to compartmentalize my feelings Yep and trauma is one of the things. That creates these protective truths, and it's why our nervous system is often just will favor denial over disruption. Right, because if you really talked about what you actually were feeling, you're probably going to, you know, be afraid, you're going to get more upset. Right.
Speaker 2:Like if somebody is really I recently you know when, I mean when my dog got really sick and if someone came up to ask me what was wrong, I knew I was going to fall apart you know and be like I'm okay, it's okay, Everything's okay, it's not okay, but I'm just trying to like hold it together, which is, you know, sometimes you're doing that because, well, for me, I knew I would just be thrown into a reaction that I really couldn't manage at that time.
Speaker 2:So I'm protecting my nervous system at that moment, but I'm not really being honest about what I'm actually feeling. And absolutely there's sometimes where it's just not appropriate or it's, you know, maybe it's not safe, you're not with the right people, but at some point I think it's just really kind of owning what your reactions are, owning what your feelings are, being honest about that, not holding onto it. So, situationally, yeah, once in a while I don't think it can be avoided all the time, but it's just maybe looking at whether or not this has become like a, like a coping mechanism Like this is your go-to is to just constantly you know, push away what you're actually feeling.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you're there to is to just constantly. You know, push away what you're actually feeling.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Cause in some ways, you know you, you can't push them away.
Speaker 2:No, no, and it's not about being hard on yourself, you know. It's just about, I don't know, meeting your own bullshit with compassion and and like an ounce of curiosity.
Speaker 1:Just a little curiosity goes a long way, Cause you know, when you ask the question to the mom, you know what does that disrespect look like to you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think I just wanted to know like okay, disrespect, like what does it mean to you? So I mean, in any situation that you're having a reaction, it's it's starting to zoom out and look at like what is? Yeah, what is this, what am I making this mean? And I think we do a lot of meaning making out of everything. It's something somebody says, something. We make a meaning out of it. But the job is really, when you are having a reaction to something, ask yourself, what am I making this mean?
Speaker 1:Am I amplifying?
Speaker 2:it. Am I, yeah, am I turning the volume up unnecessarily.
Speaker 1:What am I avoiding feeling?
Speaker 2:And really starting to get curious about that, because for her, that moment of shift was just like oh yeah, because if my child is not obedient, then what does that mean? The question would be like okay to her is well, what does that mean? When someone's child is not obedient, what does that mean about them? And it was like well, it means they're not doing a good job parenting, oh okay, so what you're making it mean it means they're not doing a good job parenting, oh okay. So what you're making it mean is that you are not doing a good job parenting because of ABC. So you know, that's where the investigation can begin.
Speaker 1:Curiosity.
Speaker 2:And then you start leading that back even further. Okay, and then you start leading that back even further, okay. So you know in your own parent when you were being parented or how you know. You start looking at the patterns that even came before that. Yeah, you know how was your relationship with your mom.
Speaker 1:What did that mean about her, if you weren't being well behaved, stepping back a little bit and kind of just looking?
Speaker 2:at patterns that may exist already.
Speaker 1:Yeah, In your own childhood.
Speaker 2:Right, and not just about parenting, but I mean even relationships. You know like there was another example um working with someone who was really staying in a relationship way too long you know that, um, and it was like, well, I she loved being needed, you know, but was not feeling loved. So it was like are you staying in the relationship because you need to feel needed? And that is giving you a sense of worth, right. And it's like, yeah, we all want to be needed, but to what detriment?
Speaker 1:Yeah, because being needed doesn't mean being loved.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:And we don't always know that because when we tie our worth into being needed, and that can feel like well, I'm loved because I'm needed, and it's like.
Speaker 2:That doesn't always, you know, play out that way, especially when you find that suddenly you're very miserable. So it's just looking at the patterns that you're repeating in your own life and really getting honest about where did that come from, you know? And what am I? What am I avoiding feeling by perpetuating that right? So I don't know. I think some of the things we can just practice saying is maybe, like this part of me is scared and I'm avoiding growth oh.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know, something I had to be really honest with was, you know, I've been working so hard on holding space, you know, and it's been such a pivotal, the target the most focused I can get with. What the issue is in my relationship is that I have an inability to be, to hear criticism and and actually, um, not go, you know, not get triggered and and by criticism, by the criticism. So if somebody comes to me, if my wife would come to me and say, hey, I've got this issue I want to talk about, I just couldn't get. I couldn't hear it and because I wanted to do I wanted, I loved so much and I felt like I'm doing a good job, I don't. I couldn't be the person that did bad.
Speaker 2:Because if you were, then what? What does that mean?
Speaker 1:It's all the stories.
Speaker 2:What does it mean if someone criticized you?
Speaker 1:That I'm a bad person, that I'm not good enough, that I'm not worthy, and so all of those triggers started to come up in me and I had to finally get to a place where I was honest enough to say where am I really failing in this relationship? In many relationships Cause it's kind of the core of it is I'm not able to hold space in my interpersonal relationships because when they say something to me that's, I feel, is any sort of criticism, I automatically go into defense mode and I haven't been able to sit in one place and then not go. But you, but you didn't do this, but I did this to make up for it. You know, like all of these either, justifying all these things. So I had to finally come and be honest with myself that I am not the, you know, I'm not the victim, I am not the.
Speaker 1:You know, I'm not the victim and really what I'm doing is I'm not, I can't. If I'm in victim, I can't hold space.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:And that's what I realized that when I got to be so honest with myself, that was the place that really shifted for me, where it was like I have to get to a place where I can be honest and not be in victim, because if I can do that, then I can be in a place that's not triggered by what somebody's coming and I can actually hold space for that person. Does that make sense?
Speaker 2:It does. And my question to you is what does holding space mean to you?
Speaker 1:What does holding space mean to you. You know, when Chad was here talking about his PTSD and his struggles with alcoholism and he said something that was like what do you wish somebody would have been able to do for you? And he just said just be there, just sit, you don't even got to say anything, and that's something I struggle with the most is not saying anything, because the awkward silence and I feel like I have to interject or say something, but being able to just sit with somebody.
Speaker 2:I think that's holding space. The fixer part of you starts to step in Right, right, right.
Speaker 1:Because being honest would be it's not about me, I don't need to interject here this is about this person. That would be the ultimate honesty in that situation. So to me, I think that's what's holding space, is being open to what the other person's, it's coming down or meeting somebody at their energy and at their vibe or their level or where they're at.
Speaker 2:and, yeah, holding space that ways well, think about what the words holding space mean like you're, like literally, you're just creating a container for for a person to open up and that they feel safe and held in that container not like physically held, but just like you, you're holding a place for them to just be honest and just be able to be radically honest, you know, and to be able to feel what they're feeling, explore what they're feeling without any repercussion.
Speaker 1:But see, that's to be radically honest, you have to feel safe enough to do so. Right, and I've been the antithesis of that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so you were doing the opposite of holding space.
Speaker 1:I think you're using holding space as the Is there a better word you mean, or is it just kind of too broad?
Speaker 2:I think it's like. I think holding space to me feels like somebody who is going to have their experience without me inserting any part of myself into it.
Speaker 1:Got it yes.
Speaker 2:Because now I have I'm like kind of polluting it with my input.
Speaker 1:Detaching from the situation? Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2:And I didn't understand that until I had somebody. You know, before I had somebody would say hold space. And I'm like, what does that mean? Like you're setting up four corners of a, like I had, no, I, it sounds very foreign. I think in the spiritual community it's very um understood what that means, but until you've had someone do it for you, you don't understand what it feels like to have it. Have it done, you've had it done. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And so I think that's where it gets a little tricky, because the, you know, sometimes the people who hold the best space for you are the ones that don't really know you that well why? Because they're not triggered by you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, the interpersonal relationships with me is where my issue is. With others, it's I can do it.
Speaker 2:It's very neutral, you know, and so you're able to go. Yeah, let me just listen to that. You're not listening to it with your defenses up. So it just made me think of that. Like it's really hard to hold space for people you have close relationships that you have conflict with, you know, because there's going to be a part of you that reacts and wants to get in there. So, anyway, that's a whole, nother another subject, but it made me think about you know.
Speaker 2:that would be more like let's have a conversation because you're part of it, you're part of the back and forth, but if there's a part of you that is triggered by it, then you know you're not able to be radically honest in that space.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you know I was fortunate enough to have kind of an aha moment, kind of like you did with that mom. Do you have anything like that with you? Do you have an anecdote that you that kind of?
Speaker 2:Where, like just being radically honest, yeah, I mean I would say my relationship with Mondo. All the time. You know, like our closest relationships are the ones that mirror back for us. But I mean, I'd say like shoot on daily basis. Sometimes I'll have like wow, there's something going on here that is more about me than about what he's doing. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So how do you handle that with your? Do you always tell him about it, or do you handle it internally and kind of make a shift.
Speaker 2:I'm not always, in the moment, able to handle it. So I would say, you know, unfortunately, I can know all the greatest things, but even but in my, you know, in my closest relationships with which is really Mondo and you and you know people that I'm, I'm with all the time is that I still can revert to like a shutdown and like I'm fine, everything's okay. Because at the moment I don't feel like I am equipped to have an honest conversation and I will shut down. But I can tell you that internally I I am calling myself out um on it, like I'm like you know you're being cold or you know you're being quiet.
Speaker 1:That's your inner dialogue.
Speaker 2:Yeah, um, and the other, the inner, the dialogue back is yeah, I know, but right now I'm not in a good position to have a productive conversation. So, fortunately, you know, like most recently we had something happen and I you know now it's so unimportant that I can't remember exactly what it was, what it was. But the next day we sat down and I said, you know, this really hurt me when you said this thing and this is what I was feeling, and he was, he was in a good place to hear me back, and so we were able to really talk about what our feelings were. But sometimes it takes me the next day.
Speaker 1:Well, you know part of what I was thinking about when you say radical honesty, even with yourself. I mean, I think a part of the radical honesty is knowing when you're in a position to actually talk about it, Right, yeah.
Speaker 1:Because that's actually like you said when you were talking about when your dog was sick. It's, it's, you know, when you're in a position to kind of handle what's coming on. And sometimes the part of the being radically honest is like I need to pause, yes, yeah, and it's not time to talk about it. And I can't be radically honest right now because that, being vulnerable, you know, one of the things with me, you know in particular about what I talked about is I haven't been able to hold space. Is I asked, you know, if there, if we can make it to where we talk about it a little bit first, like, hey, you know, maybe even just ask me, are you in a position to where you think we can talk about something? Cause then maybe I can do some breath work or I can just kind of, or maybe I'm just in a mood to talk, you know, but at least just checking with me, because I'm not always, you know the Dalai Lama, I'm not walking around and emotionally balanced.
Speaker 2:Sometimes I'm not always. You know the Dalai.
Speaker 1:Lama, I'm not walking around emotionally balanced. Sometimes you're the Dalai Lama, you're right. Huh, I inferred that I'm sometimes, but at least I'm trying to be as calm as that, that's my mind is like I would like to be at peace. You know what I mean, and so I'm not always there. So you know, I've kind of asked if it was possible, because I know it's not always possible, like, oh, I have something really. Something comes up on our everyday life. You're not going to go deep. Are you emotionally balanced to talk right now? I know that's not a reality, but if it's some of the big things, you know, when we've kind of built a sandbag a little bit where we haven't really talked about the things on the daily, so they built up a little bit and got more weight to them than maybe you know, I said what about asking? And if I'm in a place where I can talk about it, it's better for me.
Speaker 2:I would say, and I want to reflect back to you, that there's been a lot of growth in you like even saying, talking about that specific thing of you having to be like to be honest and be honest with myself. I am not in a position to have this conversation where in the past you could. You would just be an angry conversation.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's what it would go.
Speaker 2:You know, and now you've had to do a lot of self-reflection and be like, yeah, right now I'm not good, I'm not neutral, I'm actually really upset and I know that this is not a good time to have a conversation with me. So I think there is a level of radical honesty even in that, like there's levels of it, and I think that you know. I just want to reflect back to you that you have made a lot of strides in being able to recognize when you're in a place to have a conversation and when you're not, which is a good thing.
Speaker 1:Oh, thanks.
Speaker 2:Yeah. So like saying I'm fine is not honest, right, as opposed to you know what, right now I'm not fine and I don't think having a conversation with me right now would be the best thing for either of us.
Speaker 1:Let's put a pin in it and let's talk about it tomorrow, exactly. So that's a level of honesty, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's like saying I'm I'm just not in a good place to talk about it, you know, and I think like for me with that situation with Mondo, I could have done a better job of just saying I'm upset right now and I'm not in a position to talk about it, but I will later.
Speaker 1:But you know what, funny enough, the thing that puts me into a place to be able to talk is getting radically honest with myself.
Speaker 2:Seriously.
Speaker 1:I mean, that's, that's where do I go? When it's like, oh, we're going to have this talk, I really go into self-reflection Like what's my part in this?
Speaker 2:you know, yeah, there's. There's a book by um I think it's Fleet Mall called Radical Responsibility, and he says something that really stopped me in my tracks, and that was we're not responsible for what happens to us, but we're responsible for how we relate to it. You know, that's it, that's the shift. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:You know. So it's realizing like you don't, you don't have to wait for someone else to fix or apologize or save us. It's like we can reclaim the driver's seat, and it may be a bumpy ride, you know, but at least reclaim that driver's seat, Like be really honest with yourself about what's happening and what you need in that moment. Um, but also I don't know that, the level of responsibility, of really getting curious about why we feel the way we do, what patterns have led up to that? What are we trying to interrupt in order to not repeat it is, I think, that's some of the best work that we can do.
Speaker 1:Being curious is the key.
Speaker 2:I think, yeah, it's not beating yourself up, it's just being brave enough to look yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think I have some questions that I want people to ask themselves you know, maybe if you're driving or later for journaling, is here's one of them. What story am I still telling that for my emotions? Like, where are we putting it on someone else that I feel that way? They made me feel this, like, first of all, nobody can make you feel anything right. We need to take responsibility for what we're feeling and why. Hmm, what would radical responsibility feel like in my body?
Speaker 1:take a deep breath on that one.
Speaker 2:It's going to be uncomfortable for a minute. Just sit with it. But it gets better. It does get better. It gets better and better.
Speaker 2:What do you think about doing a little mini breathwork session? Sure, all right. So, for those of you who are listening, if you are not driving a vehicle, we encourage you to join us on, just like, a five minute little mini breathwork session, or maybe save this for later. And this is about, you know, integrating radical responsibility, and we're going to do it in the 10, 20, 30 breath format. So go ahead and just get comfortable, just feel the seat beneath you. You can have your spine upright or just laying down, eyes closed, and inhale the truth of your becoming. Hold and feel the weight of your choices without shame. Exhale the old stories that no longer define you. Exhale the old stories that no longer define you. And here we go for 10 deep breaths, open mouth inhales and exhales Belly to chest. Here we go 10 inhales and exhales, sweeping the body like a broom, letting go of all the old stories.
Speaker 2:Inhale On your next inhale, we're going to hold at the top and exhale, feel the weight of all of your choices without shame, letting it all go. Let's go for 20 breaths. Let's go deep inhales, belly to chest. Every exhale, a full release, letting go of all of the stress. What are the old emotions we've been holding on to. What are the old emotions we've been holding on to? What are you ready to let go of? Five more? Here we go and exhale, letting it all go, holding here on empty for 20 and inhale in, inhale the truth of your becoming. Let's go for 30 breaths. 30 breaths Sweeping all the way through the body Big, deep inhales and exhales.
Speaker 2:You've got it what are the old pains we've been holding on to? What honesty wants to meet you? Two more, one more breath in. Two more, one more breath in and let it go all the way out. Holding here at empty for 30 seconds, holding and noticing what is the story, I'm still telling that no longer matches who I am becoming. What truth am I not ready to admit where there's heaviness in the body? But are you ready to let go of what's taking up way too much space Holding here? You're ready. Let it all go, breathe naturally and normally and just say quietly to yourself I meet myself honestly and I rise with responsibility. You can keep your eyes closed just noticing. Where are you ready to tell the truth to yourself? Where can you respond differently from choice, not old patterning? Take a big breath in and maybe an audible exhale, slowly opening your eyes, rolling out your wrists, coming back into the space. Thank you for joining us and if this one hit home, wait until we talk about radical forgiveness.
Speaker 1:All right, that's been another episode of Let that Shift Go podcast. I'm Noel and I'm Lena.
Speaker 2:Let us know what your questions are and we'd love to use them on a future episode. Or check us out on Insta at Let that Shift Go, or visit our website, serenitycovetomeculacom.