What If Closure Is Something You Write, Not Receive

A single brave letter can change the weight you carry. We sit down with our friend Sergio to unpack release and rewrite: a grounded practice of writing letters—sometimes sent, often not—that helps you find closure without needing anyone’s permission. What began as a full-circle breathwork moment became a deeper conversation about grief after losing a job, leadership loneliness, and the unspoken expectations that can rupture a brother-level bond.

Sergio walks us through the moment he realized “I’ve let it go” wasn’t the whole truth, and how a sauna, slow breathing, and a carefully written message opened space for compassion. He didn’t write to win or to fix; he wrote to tell the truth, own his part, and set down a heavy pack. The reply he received wasn’t the point—but it held humanity he didn’t expect, reflecting shared grief and care from the other side. That single exchange sparked a second wave of healing through unsent letters to others involved, proving that closure is an inside job.

Along the way we explore why breathwork and somatic awareness make forgiveness safer, how to separate relief from reconciliation, and what healthy leadership can look like when boundaries and friendship live together. We offer a simple framework to try at home: breathe, write what happened and how it felt, name your accountability, state your release, and decide—without pressure—whether to send. We also touch on choosing the next hard letter, nurturing family ties, and letting silence do its quiet work.

If you’re holding a story that still spikes your chest, this conversation offers a path back to steady ground. Listen, try the practice, and tell us: who’s your next letter to? Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs gentle closure, and leave a review to help others find the show.

https://www.mictlanjourneysomatics.com

https://www.instagram.com/mictlan.journey/

https://www.tiktok.com/@mictlan.journey

https://www.serenitycovetemecula.com

Transcript

Welcome And Today’s Focus

SPEAKER_00 0:09

Hello and welcome to the Let That Shift Go podcast. I'm Noel.

SPEAKER_02 0:13

And I'm Lena.

SPEAKER_00 0:14

And this is where we talk about the good, the bad, and all the shift in between.

SPEAKER_02 0:20

We'll just talk mad shift.

Sergio’s Full-Circle Breathwork Moment

SPEAKER_01 0:22

Let's get into it. And on this week's episode, we're going to talk about release and rewrite. And how this came up is just talk right up talking about writing letters to individuals, kind of we hold unfinished business with, I guess. And uh, but before we get into that, um, we've got Sergio here again as a guest, a host. You and uh we're we want to talk about that a little bit. So, Sergio, I want what I wanted to do is when we got back together, you told me about an experience and a conversation that we had that sparked something and created a process for you. And let's talk about that.

SPEAKER_03 1:01

Yeah. So I think I was here, geez, a few months ago. Right. Yep. And um I we were having a conversation, right? That's when I did the breathwork session, right? And so I I put you through that, and then we were teasing out some stuff and we're at dinner actually.

SPEAKER_01 1:22

Yeah, you put me through you you were gracious enough to put me through a breathwork um practice, which was I'm so grateful for because being a breathwork breathwork facilitator myself, so I don't always have somebody take me through that. So that was such a beautiful process to be a part of, and then it kind of opened up this conversation.

SPEAKER_03 1:40

Yeah, and that was you know, what's uh for me that was uh like incredibly honoring, right? Because that was full circle when I had my first breath work session where this big epiphany, big release, big uh experience, it was when you put me through it. Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_01 1:56

So that's such a great thing.

SPEAKER_03 1:58

You fast forward about two years, right? And I I have the opportunity to do that for you, right? Uh and that was a gift in itself, like that just being able to meet you there, right?

SPEAKER_01 2:10

And um, likewise, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:12

I mean, and and and just to talk a little bit more about that experience, like um, I think you said like, I don't know, I like it's a lot. Yeah, you were like there's a lot there, and I um I was kind of hesitant. You like I think you were hesitant to see if I was gonna be able to meet you there.

SPEAKER_01 2:29

Yeah, you know, I'm glad you brought that up because I feel like I've had many, you know, different um breath work coaches, not many, but I've had a few. And sometimes I feel like people won't push me as hard as they need to because they don't know me. And like I'm a type that just needs to be pushed. Yeah. And I I felt like you knew me and you kind of just know my context. And and then asking you to do that for me, and I was like, God, should I ask him to do if he would be willing to do breath work, you know, for with me? And and I knew you would, but I thought it was like a big ask, right? So when I asked, I didn't know what to expect. But when you did, I don't know, I felt like a level of um comfort with you because you had shared with me so much so early. And I've so it was almost like a give and take, you know what I mean? Some reciprocity in the situation. And um just I don't know, your posture, your strength, just the way you carry yourself.

SPEAKER_05 3:24

Yeah.

Pushing Limits And Feeling Truly Supported

SPEAKER_01 3:25

Um during the breath work, I just felt like like strength, just like power to push me. Where in some cases I've had it where it was it, I've I felt like my own spirit was just not letting that person push me to go as deep as I needed to. Yeah. And in and with that particular breath work, um, I had I was holding a lot and had done it, hadn't done a transformational breath work that big in a while. And so it was it was so releasing and and uh you know, life-changing in a way. It it it really did open up some things for me and helped me. It takes, I find whenever I do things like that, it takes weeks for me to integrate kind of all the things I process because I think about things afterwards and I go, wow, you know, like that was a lot, I was pretty heavy.

SPEAKER_03 4:09

Yeah, it's a lot. Yeah, that's a lot. Um, you know, it it's interesting because when I went through my in-person training, right? Um, when we were going through some practices and even the breath work journey at the end, uh I felt like the my partner that I had, like, like I turned off their energy, right? Like my eyes were closed and everything, and we're doing the breath work, and I could, and there was another time during the four days that I felt that as well. There was and my uh a different partner that I had, like I had this release and just the way I was reacting and expressing and discharging and all the stuff that was happening. I felt like my energy was so big that I turned them off. Like I could feel them disappear even though my eyes were closed, like I could feel them just like I hear that, right? And it took like the pract the the instructors or practitioners to come over, like three of them, and then I could feel supported, right, with energetically, yeah. Uh their presence, the way they were the things they were saying were landing, right? The the them holding my hand and all this stuff, right? Like it, I just felt like supported and uh able to release, right? And so when we were going through that uh with you, like I wanted to make sure that I was that, right? And like you you embodied that, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:30

Oh, you know, that so I totally felt that.

SPEAKER_03 5:32

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, so it was great. Yeah, it's awesome. But yeah, so so it was then, right, when I came here. And uh we talked about we were at dinner, we're talking about I think some um some things from the past, right? Like uh you said something about you mentioned something about work, right? Or my for me at work, and I said something like, Oh, forget that, or something, right? Like very dismissive. And yeah, you didn't just move on, right? You're like, there's something there, yeah. And I think you asked me like, What's there for you? Right. I'm like, nothing, man. Like I've I've let that go.

SPEAKER_01 6:09

Yeah, I've talked about it already, you know, like I'm okay.

Spotting The Unreleased Story

The Letter As A Forgiveness Tool

SPEAKER_03 6:12

We're good, right? And then so you're like, huh, okay. You know, and then we finished dinner and we're like, oh yeah, it's time to get in the sauna, the cold plunge, and we're in the sauna, and it's just you and I were talking, and you're like, What's there for you, man? So I remember this. Instead of feeling like attacked, right? Like, oh man, this guy wants prying. No, it was like, oh, what's he saying? What's he seeing that I'm not seeing? Right? And uh later you said something when I was in the w cold water, right? And we're and I was there, I think I ended up being in there for like 10 minutes or something. Yeah, excessive. Yeah, yeah, I don't know how we were talking, yeah, right? Exactly. And so I was like, oh, yeah, there's something there. And you suggested uh, you know, like maybe you haven't forgiven this person or these people, and maybe there's something there. Um sometimes just writing a letter, right, and not sending it, is uh could be helpful, right? Or like why don't you try that? And so I went home and uh and I didn't think about it for a few weeks, but then as I continued to do sauna work and and cold plunge and sauna and cold plunge and just really journaling, that kept coming up. Like I was like, have I really forgiven this person? And the topic of forgiveness kept coming up. I would do my daily practice and I would do some longer breath work sessions, and this topic would like it just it would just come up, bubble up, right? And this guy's name would pop up, and and um I would notice how I would react when in my professional world his name would come up and I was like, there's something wrong here, right? Something's not completely closed. So I was in Asana and I decided to write a letter. Right? And uh in that letter I told him, like, hey man, like you know, I've known this person for 20 plus years, uh basically my entire EMS career. Yeah, I mean it it meant something to you, this relationship. Yeah, and when I got fired, um my perspective is that they had something to do with it, and and that and you know, that at least that came across their desk and they approved the termination, right? Um so being in leadership up and down in those years, uh, we really did a lot of work for for the community, for the organization, uh, for our teams. Um and I really building the culture of the community in the trenches, really. I felt like we were in the trenches together for a long time. Right. And even though we didn't agree on a lot of things, like we we could banter and be direct with each other and really be honest. You had a synergy that you can still work with. We had that relationship where I could like call him out, he can call me out and all this stuff, right? And then we could move forward, right? For the better good. So when that fell apart, um, I think I I felt like I lost a brother, right? I felt like I lost uh like I expected more from him, right? Didn't have your back. Yeah, I expected more, I expected him to show up differently as a man, as a as a human, right? In a sense, and I felt betrayed, right? I felt incredibly betrayed. I felt um really let down, right? And isolated and lonely, right? So I wrote all those things down.

SPEAKER_01 9:43

You're just self-discovering as you're kind of journaling through these things, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:47

And when I wrote the letter, I didn't write it from a place of anger, right? I didn't I just it was time for me to just let it go.

Sending The Message And Letting Go

SPEAKER_01 9:56

Yeah. And sometimes when I do this release and rewrite type process, it's kind of like I'll write it with with no anticipation of giving it to them, and it's it's kind of a little bit harsh. And then I read it, I go, wow, that's pretty mean. So I'll release as I'm rewriting it, I'm releasing kind of some of the energy and in in this what I'm trying to get across in that message. Um, and so like your journaling was what I hear is like was a process of this kind of emoting your feelings about what you wanted to say to this person.

SPEAKER_03 10:26

Yeah, you know, and and what I realized is that I didn't it didn't have to come from a place of like anger or disappointment, even though I was angry at one point, and I was disappointed at one point. I didn't have to like um it's it's you know, like you know have you ever experienced when somebody is like saying sorry, but they're like underhanded, like yeah, it's like a backhanded, yeah. Yeah, there's no yeah, yeah, it doesn't hold weight. Exactly, right? I didn't want that. I wanted to be a true episode of forgiveness or uh an event of forgiveness, not for them. Like me forgiving this person had nothing to do with them.

SPEAKER_05 11:05

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 11:06

It had everything to do with me. So if I decided to send this letter, it didn't require a response. If there was one, it really didn't matter what it would be. Yeah, right. If it was positive or negative or nothing, it was all the same result for me, right? It would all have the same uh closure.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

Yeah, you can almost uh you know release it in a burning ceremony, burn it and just say, I'm letting this one go. Yeah, in in a sense, right? And I thought about that.

SPEAKER_03 11:31

Yeah. I thought, oh maybe I should write it down. And then burn it and say Sayanara, right?

SPEAKER_01 11:36

Yeah, yeah. But you took you brave enough to send it.

SPEAKER_03 11:40

Yeah, so when I'm going through this, right, I I don't like I didn't think about it and plan it. I was just in the sauna, in the moment, and I and I wrote it down. I wrote it in a text.

SPEAKER_01 11:50

Oh, in a text, okay. Ooh, danger zone. So this is this is even braver. It's like standing with safety lines because you could accidentally hit send and then you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_03 11:59

So I I typed it all up, and it was basically like, hey man, all the things that I was disappointed in, the expectations that I had that they didn't meet. Gotcha. Um, but also taking accountability for the things that I could have maybe done better.

SPEAKER_01 12:13

Yeah.

An Unexpected Human Response

SPEAKER_03 12:14

Or um, you know, a a big piece of that was like um I I was upset that what they did put me in this dark place, right? Like that was like um, you know, it's like Homer Simpson driving down the road like faced off at traffic, like that anger of like why me? Got it, right? And so when I wrote it down, it was explaining all those things, but not trying to beat him down. Just saying them.

SPEAKER_01 12:45

Just matter of fact. Yeah, just how it made you feel. This is how it affected.

SPEAKER_03 12:49

This is what I this is what it caused for me, right? Uh acknowledging my responsibility in the in the whole thing or in the accountability piece of that, right? And then saying like, hey uh um, I forgive you for not being able to show up for me as a as a person that I thought you were. You know, I forgive you for not showing up like the person that I the man that I needed, right? Uh I forgive you for um, you know, uh l leaving me alone.

SPEAKER_04 13:20

Right.

SPEAKER_03 13:20

Uh and then also saying like I hope you have a good life. Right? Because I don't I don't wish anything negative on them. It's just for me, it was time to just stop carrying that, put the backpack down. Right. And then I hit send.

SPEAKER_01 13:38

Now I wanna I wanna know what because see I've I've I've done this practice where I I write these these messages out, and a lot of time what I do is I put it into my notes, and then and then if I plan to send it, I'll cut and paste it into it thing, because it's safer for me because I've accidentally sent messages while I'm like in the middle, I'll be during the work day and I won't send it yet, and then I'll come back. Oh, and oops, oops. You know, nowadays you can kind of but so yeah, I try not to um do it that way. So, what I want to know from you, what what a lot of times I will write these messages, but not ever actually send them. And the few times that I do, why was it for you that that you sent you decided to send this one?

Wider Closure And Unsent Letters

SPEAKER_03 14:19

So I typed it up and I I was in the sauna, right? 30 minutes or something, and I let it sit there and I just breathed for a little bit.

SPEAKER_04 14:29

I deep into my belly and I what do I need to do in this moment? Right? And I said, if it was me, I would like to know that I heard somebody.

SPEAKER_05 14:43

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 14:44

So I hit it. Yeah. And I didn't feel anxious afterwards.

SPEAKER_03 14:52

Okay, okay. I thought I would, right? I really thought I I would be like, oh sh what's next? Right.

SPEAKER_01 14:58

What was the what was the emotion? If you had to put one word after you sent that, what was there? Was there a release?

SPEAKER_03 15:03

Was there um I felt um relief.

SPEAKER_01 15:09

Relief, okay.

SPEAKER_03 15:10

Relief because I think up until that point I was grieving that relationship. I had already gone through anger, denial, depression, all of that. And I finally accepted that that relationship was over for what it was, right? It was over, and so now it was my time to forgive. And so, like when I sent it, that's what I mean that I didn't require an answer or a response. I didn't not that I don't care, like obviously I do care, right? But like I don't it it wasn't necessary.

SPEAKER_01 15:44

It's not gonna move you from your piece.

SPEAKER_03 15:45

Yeah, and then in the message, like I wrote that like there's you don't have to respond. I don't require a response. I hope you have a good life, right? Like, very it w I think it was a kind message. I don't think I don't think it was you know insulting or um offensive at all. Like it was very like human guy, and then I got a response.

SPEAKER_01 16:08

So how many minutes of a response? Like you how long did it take? About 20 minutes. Okay, like I was still in the sauna. Okay, okay, so that so that that gives some context there. So you're still in the sauna, kind of just being with yourself, because that was the the situation, anyways.

SPEAKER_03 16:24

Yeah, okay. And so the response was not what I expected. What did you expect?

SPEAKER_01 16:32

Um because you've had so much vitriol and and anger, so I'm sure you've built this tremendous story of like who this person became.

Leadership, Loss, And True Community

SPEAKER_03 16:43

I I don't know. I I don't know that I ever actually thought about it. I just was angry, right? And I I think I didn't expect him to be human that way. I didn't expect uh the response that I got was um that they went through their challenges as well, that they grieved their relationship as well, and that they did see me as a brother and that they were very hurt that all these things happened the way they happened. Very similar message, yeah. Right, and you know, they went through some uh challenges, right? Uh sleepless nights and uh they got therapy and teased out a lot of things, and they they're happy to know that I made it out on the other side, a better person, and that um, you know, that all they ever wanted for me was the best for me and my family. And then, you know, like he said, like, I love you, man. Wow. And reading that, although it didn't require a response, right? And I still, even when I read it, I was like skeptical to a to a s to a degree, right? Like, maybe he's just saying this just to appease me or whatever, right? So I tried to not get into that, right? To to try to identify why he said what he said, yeah, but just really let the word land if they you know, if they were gonna land somewhere, just let them if they made me feel good, they made me feel good. If they made me feel um indifferent, they then I was indifferent. It didn't matter, right? And so I just saw them for what they were, and I said, thank you.

SPEAKER_04 18:17

That's it. Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 18:20

And what happened afterwards was like I just felt light, like incredibly light. Um you know how you don't really know how heavy something is until you put it down? Yeah, and then you have to pick it back up. Yeah kind of like that.

SPEAKER_05 18:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 18:36

Right. And I was like, whoa, this is uh powerful. And what that did was it it forced me to look at all of the individuals that were involved in this decision when I lost my job, or that at least that I I think were involved, right? Because I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

Um, and I forgave them too. They all got letters. So it created a second step for you, and your second step was it this initial letter created something inside of you that was a positive response. So you so you wrote letters for the other people, yeah, and they all got a letter, they just never received it.

SPEAKER_03 19:14

Right? So in my mind, or right, he's the one that I think I grieved or loss more of. Right. So I sent the letter, he he got his letter, right? But everybody else didn't get one, right? Yeah, and they're not gonna get one because it's over. Yeah, the closure happened, it's over. You know, if I ever see them again, then I see them. If I don't see them, then I don't see them. It that's not the I'm not thinking about that, right? I'm just not living there anymore, right? But they all got their letter.

Repairing Bonds And Writing The Hard Letter

SPEAKER_01 19:45

It almost makes sense because uh you the way that you explained your relationship with this other person was that you guys were in the trenches together, very similar. And so it it's shocking that you guys had a very similar response. You know what I mean? It really shouldn't be that you guys were very, you know, very similar in terms of who you guys were. It just there's always a difference. I I know a lot of people that I'm similar to, but then there's a difference, you know what I mean? And and that's what makes us individuals, and and and that's what you guys helped each other change in a way. You know, Leno always says you're somebody's in your life for a reason or a season, and that that person, even in that response, created another change.

SPEAKER_03 20:24

Yeah, you know, and I I realize now through all the things that I've dealt with and the exploration and stuff, is that all of the decisions, all the left turns, all the right turns, all the stops, all those things that I've made in my life, those are what bring me to where I stand today, right? Yeah, and so that's also true for him. Right? So if that never happened, I never put potentially never go discover myself, climb to the depths of my spirit, my soul, and find out who I am, what makes me tick, and I don't come out on top, and I don't forgive him, and I don't write the letter. And and it doesn't cause him to dive into himself to change. So while it may be painful to go through all that stuff, it's all happening for a reason, right? And it happened to just be that maybe this was a catalyst that led him to go get help.

SPEAKER_05 21:27

Mm-hmm.

Silence, Somatics, And Letting Things Breathe

SPEAKER_03 21:27

And it was a catalyst that led me to go get help, right? That doesn't mean we get to be friends again. That doesn't that doesn't mean that we have to be friends again. Yeah. It also doesn't mean that we don't have to be friends again. It just is, right? And it's that letting go piece that you can just let things be. Right? Hey man, take a let things let it breathe for a second, you know? Like let it simmer. You don't have to force it. Exactly. Right? Like when you're i I use this when I'm smoking meat in the smoker, right? This is funny, right? If you're looking, you ain't cooking. Right? Let the thing smoke. Yeah. You know, let it do its job, right? And that's true in life, right? Like trust in it. Yeah. Like let the you know, a lot of people say let Jesus take the wheel, let the universe control do what the universe does. Yeah, things aren't gonna fall in your lap. But if you lean in lean into those things and and take the lessons and really say, What is this teaching me? You can learn to let go. Right? And when you let go, amazing things can happen because you can then smell the flowers, enjoy the sunset, take a deep breath, right? All those things. Because if you're too busy controlling, you're not too you're too busy to let things happen.

SPEAKER_01 22:42

Yeah. Yeah, you're too busy controlling everything and not just allowing it just to naturally develop on itself. Yeah. Man. And so you so that that created another process to write to these other people. And you didn't send those letters, but it it had probably what kind of effect did that have on you? Is for even though you didn't send the other letters. It just created closure, right?

SPEAKER_03 23:10

Um the closure that I needed for them, right? I I don't think I needed as much closure from those folks because I didn't know them as long and I don't I didn't have the life experiences. Like, you know, you gotta think about like I've been in EMS since 2001, right? Yeah, wow. Around that time. 25 years now, yeah. Is when I met this dude.

SPEAKER_01 23:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 23:27

Right.

SPEAKER_01 23:27

And that's a long time to know somebody.

Where To Find Sergio & Wrap

SPEAKER_03 23:30

Yeah, right. And he his career has changed throughout those years, right? Kind of like two different paths that we took in our careers. I went, I was a fireman, you know, became a nurse and a flight nurse, and then climbed the corporate ladder and all this stuff through leadership. I worked for him, you know, all these things, right? And he took a he's you know took a different path. He climbed up, went flying, and all this stuff, and then came back down and was now in leadership, right? And so we've been in the same world for a long time. So a lot of our what molded our professional career also molded our uh personal life, right? And so we have a lot of those experiences. Um and he's older than me, right? And so we've shared a lot of the similar things, right? We know a lot of the same people, we've walked in the same circles for a long time, and so it's not the same as those other people, right? Those other people I met at work and I thought they were friends, and I was in leadership with them together, and you know, when your leadership can be a lonely place sometimes because you can't you can't be friends with your employees, right? And I found that when I got when I lost my job that that wasn't true. Like the people that actually cared about me were the people that worked for me. So, you know, when I lost my job, I was lonely. I was alone, I felt isolated, I couldn't, you know, I was on admin leave and I couldn't contact anybody within the company, which meant that I couldn't talk to my friends because those are my friends.

SPEAKER_01 25:05

Yeah, I mean, it's it's a hard thing to say. You can't because the that type of job, I've never done that type of job, but the way that you guys live on site, you know, you're on for 48 hours or 72 hours. Sometimes it's got to be you're around people much more.

SPEAKER_03 25:18

Some one of the longest friendships I've ever had is because of that work. Right. I'm I'm here today with Lena because I met her there.

SPEAKER_01 25:27

Yeah, it's a different kind of friendship, yeah. Yeah, and should the trenches really in a way that you guys like life altering situations, people are in life, you know, life or death situations. And I find I don't do that for a living, but some of my closest friends is we almost died together. And then it was like, BAM, you remember that? And I find like your like your life your career is that, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 25:48

Yeah, you're you're witnessing death and despair, and sometimes you're doing that as your life is also in despair, right? Like you're in these crazy operational situations and right, things happen, right? So you you form these bonds, right? And so when I was like, hey, you can't contact any of these people, I'm glad that those people that were my friends came came to my side anyways, right? Because I felt alone, right? And when I was able to really embody that and and and like take it in, I was incredibly grateful that they didn't leave me alone. Right. So that's when I understood, oh, this isn't life, right? And that's a lot of the questions started there, and that's when I started the self-discovery stuff, right? But because I was al because I thought they were my friends, the leadership structure that we were always together, we're doing these things, and you know, when the moment came, I felt like everybody turned their back on me and walked away, right? I was like left at the top of the hill screwing by myself. Yeah, somebody, yeah, anybody, is this thing on? You know, like and and uh it's a vulnerable space, yeah. I was it was lonely, man. Yeah, and I had never felt that way before, right? Never because I was always the respected person, I was always the the guy that people looked up to for advice in that world. You know, I was uh I was an expert. I am an expert in that field, right? And they for the first time, I felt like somebody had made a decision somewhere that they, they, the company, the community, um, the profession was better off without me. And I was like, whoa, that's scary, right? And I knew that that had I had more to offer, right? But when I was alone, uh my my true friends came, right?

SPEAKER_01 27:41

And to find enclosure in it.

SPEAKER_03 27:42

Yeah. And that taught me a ton of other lessons, right? Like leadership doesn't have to look that way. Leadership doesn't have to be isolating, leadership doesn't have to be uh you can't be a friend friends with your employees. You just have to have have boundaries, yeah, right? Healthy relationships, yes, good communication, absolutely key. Yeah, and and so now being on the other side of this forgiveness uh thing with uh with these folks, I don't carry that. Like when their names come up, they don't make me feel anything.

SPEAKER_01 28:14

And and you know, I think I think it's a powerful practice to be able to, you know, write something and have such an effect, even though even if you you don't send it to people, I found for myself, you know, sometimes the ones that I don't send are just as powerful. Um but the ones that I do send and I get a response, um change me. And and and in a way, like you say, I I I sometimes get a response that I didn't expect, and it's because I didn't fully understand the situation until I was vulnerable enough to say what my perspective was, and and you know, without the accusatory, like you said, and and being mean just saying, hey, this is how I feel through this this situation. It I I never got to the place to have perspective for them until I started to do this.

SPEAKER_03 29:06

Um yeah, I mean it's powerful, right? Like you're putting your thoughts, your emotions, and everything on paper or writing it down somewhere, right? That alone has a release in itself, right? Obviously, that's why journaling works so so well, right? Um and I think the sending it part, uh, I don't think that changed how auto felt. It felt difficult when I got a response because then I had to deal with the response a little bit, right? Like, ooh, do I how am I supposed to feel, right? That question came up a little bit, and the reality was that it didn't matter, right? The response could have been crickets, and that would that would have been probably easier.

SPEAKER_01 29:50

Because the work was actually doing all that journaling, you know, and that lead up was all the work. And when you send it, you know, yeah, that that's like hitting complete on it.

SPEAKER_03 29:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:00

Um, but it doesn't require that response.

SPEAKER_03 30:02

Yeah, it's like buying a car, right? Like you see the car, but you don't see all the dudes that worked on it, all the people that were involved designing it and engineering, and then you just see a cool car.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:13

That was a cool car.

SPEAKER_01 30:14

Yeah, it didn't just get that way. Exactly. Okay, so I have a qu a final question for you here.

SPEAKER_04 30:20

What is the next letter that you're afraid to write that you haven't written yet? Because I know you've got one.

SPEAKER_01 30:33

And it it doesn't even have to be to some it could be to anybody, not even some somebody the person could have passed away already. Yeah. So think about that. And everybody at home, I'd like you to think about somebody that you would the the next letter that you're gonna write that you haven't written yet because you haven't found that courage. But like Sergio sitting in the hot tub that one night decided he was gonna do that, you know.

SPEAKER_04 30:59

You know, I think the the person that that I I would like to write a letter for, I don't know if I'm ready, right? But I think that's down the pipe is uh to my brother.

SPEAKER_01 31:14

Yeah. That's a good one. You know why? Because the the relationship between me and Lena is so important to me. And I didn't realize why until we started to do this type of work, because it's so rare that you s you share the same DNA, the same tapestry of growing up and all the things, and to have somebody who can who has the best ability to stand understand you more completely than anybody else because he was there.

SPEAKER_05 31:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:44

Um, it's it's a it's an important relationship to nurture. And uh I, you know, when you get to that space, man, I'm I'm there in spirit for you with you.

SPEAKER_03 31:53

Yeah, thank you. Yeah, yeah. I mean, it's just uh, you know, there's a a lot of people say there's a lot of water under that bridge, but there's a bridge. There's a there's a fucking bridge. There's a bridge to get through it, to get over it, walk it, right? And so even right now when you asked me, that was like, uh man. Did you know right away that the the the the as soon as you asked it, I knew. And I have to I had to I had a feeling I had to think about if that I wanted to say that out loud.

SPEAKER_01 32:22

Well, you know, thank you for being brave enough to say it out loud. Yeah. Because it's it's an important thing.

SPEAKER_03 32:29

Yeah, yeah, and and you know, we've we've repaired our relationship through through the years, you know. Um, but I think there's there's writing a letter, right, is sometimes a little bit easier because you don't have to have the conversation, right? Yeah and deal with the egos getting in the way.

SPEAKER_01 32:47

The immediate response is sometimes hard for me.

SPEAKER_03 32:50

Yeah, if I was to say that stuff to you, right? You're you're gonna think that it requires a response right there and then. There's an obligation because there's a sense of yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:00

That's how we it's a conversation, yeah. It's gotta be two ways, right? Yeah, and it doesn't. So it's a yeah, so I think that that's uh it it's it I think that's why it's so important as an easy first step because it opens the door to conversation for the real conversations, because it it it maybe leans some le uh it shines some light onto some shadows.

SPEAKER_03 33:23

Yeah, and in this letter, right, it would be different, right? Because it's not because uh I'm grieving a relationship that ended, right? This is more of a in terms of repair, right? Um and and you know, when when I started to do the work, right, one thing that was incredibly difficult to do was be silent. Right? Like you don't not everything requires a response, right? And when I went through the breathwork uh um trainings and on all that stuff, right? One thing that kept coming up in conversation was that silence is pregnant with potential. You don't have to answer everything, right? You don't always have to have a response. You can just be like you can tell me something, and I don't have to have an answer for it because I may not know, or I may not fully understand what you're asking. It takes a little bit, right?

SPEAKER_01 34:21

And plus your mind may develop. Just I I think of it when you were saying that I was thinking about like an author, you know, writes a book, but then somebody makes a movie about it. But now I'm limited to the director's imagination, but my brain saw something totally different when I read it.

SPEAKER_03 34:35

Exactly. And we can read the same book and we yeah, the the scene looks different, right? And that's exactly it. Like just there's a two different worlds right here, right now, right? Your world and my world. Yeah, they're both real. Yep. Is perception, exactly, yeah, right? And it's okay to just be like, hmm, how does that land for me? Right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Okay. How do I how does that word what is that bringing up physically in in me, right? And once you start to figure that how to do that, right? How to how to like have this somatic awareness and and really like, is it that tension? Or is that joy, or is that sadness? You know, once you kind of figure that out, you're able to have more human experiences, right? Instead of these elotistical arguments that aren't real. Because there's two worlds battling themselves, yeah, and neither one of those is real sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 35:34

Yeah. Well, sir, I appreciate your time. It's always such a good um conversation with you, and I appreciate your vulner vulnerability and and being willing to just you know talk about the things that that we struggle with, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 35:50

Yeah, no, thank thank you. I I love uh having these conversations with with uh you and Lena and coming here and just letting it ride.

SPEAKER_01 35:58

And where can when where can people find you? Um social media.

SPEAKER_03 36:02

Yeah, so uh my website, miktelanjourney somatics.com or uh at mictalan.journey on Instagram. And if you want to get the journal, I have a journal as well that's on Amazon and I'll give you the link, but it's uh called uh uh let's see, Journey through Mictalan, a year of inner exploration. So it's a year's worth of journaling.

SPEAKER_01 36:22

Okay, awesome. Yeah, we'll put a link to that in the uh description. All right. Awesome. Thanks, Sergio.

SPEAKER_00 36:33

All right, that's been another episode of Let That Ship Go podcast. I'm Noel and I'm Lena.

SPEAKER_02 36:39

Let us know what your questions are, and we'd love to use them on a future episode. Or check us out on Insta at Let That Ship Go or visit our website, SerenityCoastameculate.com.