You’re Not Stuck — You’re Over-Preparing | How Perfectionism Keeps You From Moving Forward

Feeling stuck even though you’re doing “the work”? This episode challenges over-preparing, perfectionism, and fear, and gives practical steps to finally move. 

What if the reason you feel stuck isn’t a lack of effort—but an excess of preparation? Today we get honest about the moment when self-work becomes hiding and perfection turns into procrastination. With a steady hand and practical prompts, we move from theory to contact, from private processing to public action.

We start by naming the pattern: doing all the “right” things—journaling, healing, learning—without seeing change. Then we flip the script with one question to write at the top of your page: What am I still preparing for that I already have the tools for? That single line becomes a mirror and a map, exposing where you’ve confused motion with momentum. From there, we unpack why clarity rarely arrives from thinking longer; it comes from contact with reality—feedback, friction, and the people you aim to serve.

Next, we draw a hard line between refinement and delay. You’ll hear the mantra to remember: refinement comes after the release. We talk about acting before you feel safe, taking the first step so the next one can appear, and letting obedience lead the way. Then we introduce the 80% rule—how to ship what’s excellent enough to be real, not perfect enough to be imaginary. Underneath it all lives the deeper fear: being seen. We name the fear of failure and the fear of success, and we practice moving anyway.

By the end, you’ll have a simple framework to break the over-preparation loop: name the thing, release at 80%, and refine with data instead of doubt. If you’ve been waiting for the sign to start, consider this your green light. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs a loving push, and leave a review with one action you’ll take this week—what will you release at 80%?

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

I need to say something that I've been sitting with. And as I say it, I'm holding your hand, and I want you to listen with honesty, not defensiveness. See if you've been doing all of the right things, praying, journaling, healing, learning, reflecting, but nothing in your life is actually moving. Can I tell you that you may not be stuck, but you may be over-preparing. And at some point, preparation turns into your

Naming The Over-Preparation Trap

SPEAKER_01 0:36

perfection. And so this is what I'm talking about today. So let's go ahead and dive right into this episode. And let me say this off the break that this episode isn't for the people who aren't trying. See, you've done the work, you've gathered the tools, you've learned the language. You know yourself more than you ever have. But knowing better and moving differently are not the same. And what I'm noticing, I'm I'm hands both hands raised in myself and in so many conversations is that self-work can quietly become a place where we hide. I know,

When Self-Work Becomes Hiding

SPEAKER_01 1:22

I know, but we're not going to hide anymore. And I need you to let that breathe a bit. What you need is movement. What you need is not to feel like it has to be perfect in order for you to put it out. What you need is to get to that next level. And in order for you to get to that next level, you're going to have to move out of your own way. And so before I go any further, if you're in this space where you can, I want you to grab pen and paper, not your phone, pen and paper, because I need you to take copious notes.

Movement Over Perfection

SPEAKER_01 2:41

Because this part is going to require honesty, not performance. See, a lot of us are spinning our wheels because we're trying to get things right instead of just getting them out. And again, my hand is raised because as a creative and as someone who thinks everything can be an idea, I'm always piling on top of what I already know to do. And the more you begin to pile on top, the more it seems like you just have so much going on. But in reality, even when you're doing the work, you are not doing the right work because now the overall goal has gotten so down into the weeds and the minutia of everything that is now not even the direction that you should be moving, but because you feel like you're doing something towards that goal, it still feels like forward motion. And so, again, a lot of us are just spinning our wheels because we're

Spinning Wheels And False Progress

SPEAKER_01 3:59

trying to get through get things right instead of just getting them out. So we're tweaking things that were meant to be tested, we're perfecting things that were meant to be released. And can we be truthful? We try to put a cute name on it, and we call it wisdom, but sometimes it's just fear dressed up as discernment. And so I'm going to give you some actionable items for you, for us to move forward. And so remember, I told you to grab that pen and paper. So on your paper, I want you to write this question at the top. What am I still preparing for that I already have the tools for? Again, what am I still preparing for that I already have the tools for? Not what you're bad at, not what you still need to learn, not what you already know how to do but haven't released. No, no, no, no. Let me give you some examples. The idea, the conversation, the project, the boundary, the version of you that keeps waiting. See, we're going to have to shift some things. And here's what I've learned: that clarity doesn't come from thinking longer, it comes from contact. Contact with the world, contact with feedback, contact with reality. And then you get to a place where you're not trying to tweak what you haven't touched real life yet, touched with real life yet. See, if you're in the mindset space

Clarity Through Contact With Reality

SPEAKER_01 6:08

or just in business and marketing, you'll hear people talk about the different things that they are going to do, but they begin to do market research. And so that market research is done before they even build the thing. Whatever it is that they're getting ready to do, the only thing that they are doing is getting research. So there are some of us, and again, my hand is raised, both of them. If you all could see me, you would see both of my hands are in the air. That we will build things and haven't even checked to see if what we are getting ready to do is needed. And so then we have all of these different things, all of this stuff in our arsenal, which are great ideas, but we haven't moved on any of it, we haven't tested to see if any of it is necessary and needed. And so I want us to get

Research Versus Building What’s Needed

SPEAKER_01 7:20

to a place where, as we are leveling up, as we are going into the next version of ourselves, that we begin to pay attention to where we are, how we operate, where those areas that need to be worked on are, but then also that we're making sure that we are in touch with real life. So again, the first action item was for you to name it. The second thing is going to be for us to move from a space of um separating refinement from delay. So I need you to write this sentence down. Refinement comes after the release. And so, underneath it, somewhere, answer this honestly. Where have I been calling delay alignment? See, here's the truth that you may begin to tell yourself all of these things that I've I've had to check myself, and for me, I've had to check myself here that there were seasons where I thought I was being wise, but really, I was just waiting to feel safe, and safety rarely shows

Action Item One: Name It

SPEAKER_01 8:53

up before obedience, it meets you in it, and so the thing that I have been doing is not waiting until I am comfortable to release what it is that I need to do, getting to a place where I'm not overthinking it, even in my personal relationships, the conversations that I need to have, the things that I need to say, the ways that I need to move, and not feeling bad when I can't make it happen. But getting to a place where I've had to be truly honest with myself and to check myself. Because the next level of me, the things that are going to push my business, the things that are going to push my legacy, the things that are going to push the empire that I'm building, are not requiring me to be perfect. They are requiring me to put out what God has already showed me that I need to do. And so I've said this before that there we get to a place where sometimes we're praying, we're praying, we're praying. And yet God is saying, But I gave you the idea. I gave you what it was that I need you to do, but I need you to

Refinement Comes After Release

SPEAKER_01 10:27

act on the first thing so that I can give you the next thing. But a lot of us will get stuck in the idea phase of it. Well, I gotta have this piece, this piece, and all of these different pieces when it's like, okay, first things first, put that piece out. And then if you need to go back and make some changes to it, at least you know what you're tweaking because you have some data analysis at this point that you can go off of, as opposed to trying to make it picture perfect and then don't put anything out. The third thing that we are going to have to get very comfortable in is the 80% rule, and this is going to be the last thing that I want you to write. What would it look like to release this at 80%? Not careless, because we operate out of excellence over here, right? So again, it's not careless, it's not rushed, it's just real. And so some of you are holding back your voice, your gift, your work, not because it isn't ready, but because you don't feel ready to be seen. And that's the real right there. You put something out, and then you're afraid of what people are going to think. You're afraid that if you put it out and it doesn't work, that people will think, oh, there she goes again. You're afraid that when you put it out, that it may actually work. Can I say that that was that was a fear of mine? That it would actually work, that it would actually transform someone else's life. That's a

Obedience Before Safety

SPEAKER_01 12:28

real thing, and so I know that I can't be the only person in this space. I know I can't be the only person that feels this way because I'm being honest with myself. See, I used to think that perfection was necessary and needed, but what I realized is that perfection is just dressed up procrastination because none of us are perfect, none of us, and so if we are all imperfect beings, why am I, and I'm talking to myself, y'all are just included in this conversation. Why am I trying to put out perfect information to imperfect people when they are only just trying to show up and be the authentic version of themselves, when the authentic version of themselves is not perfect? But what they are looking for is what I have already gone through. What they are looking for is those 10,000 plus hours that I have put in reading, journaling, studying, certificates, all of those different things to be the best version of myself to be able to pour into you so that you can now get the information that I have already learned. See, now I'm talking to myself, and this is the place where now we've written down all of these three different action items, but this is where we are going to anchor and we're going to reframe because growth that never leaves your inner world eventually becomes stagnant, and healing that never touches the world becomes self-soothing. So at some point, the

Learn By Shipping Then Tweaking

SPEAKER_01 14:35

work requires courage, not another worksheet, not another class that you need to take. Everything that you need, you already have. Sit with it, write it

The 80 Percent Rule

SPEAKER_01 15:47

out, and then move, even if your hands are shaking, even if you are afraid to jump, even if you don't have all of the pieces, even if self-doubt is sitting on your shoulder, even if fear is sitting on the other one, even if shame is trying to keep you spinning, I need you to know that you're ready.

SPEAKER_00 16:18

I need you to know that we're ready. And the time is now.