8: The Power of Pause with Azia Whitted

Join me as we welcome Azia Whitted to the Build Strong Women podcast. Azia is a passionate advocate for the power of pause, and she's here to share her wisdom and practical strategies for incorporating mindfulness into our daily lives.

In today's fast-paced world, it's easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle, leaving little time for stillness and reflection. But what if pausing, even for a few moments, could be the key to unlocking greater presence, productivity, and peace?

We'll explore how taking intentional breaks can reduce stress and enhance overall well-being. You'll also learn how Azia discovered the power of pause and transformed her own life through mindful practices.

Connect with Azia! 

Website: www.Aziaranea.com

Instagram: Aziaranea

Get to know Azia and Join her newsletter: www.aziaranea.com/joincommunity

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Follow along on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/graciousadventures/

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

Hi, I'm Laura Orlando and welcome to the Build Strong Women podcast. I believe as women that we are the role models for the next generation of girls. So how do we become the best role models for these young girls? We work hard to become the best version of ourselves, whatever that means to you. It's not easy. It takes work. It takes learning, trying new things, falling down and getting back up again. But that's what we do on the show. We dive deep into how we can grow on the inside. We will learn from women that are on the same journey as us. Just trying to become the best version of themselves. Let's learn together, build our confidence, learn to love who we are so that we can teach the next generation of girls to grow up to be strong and confident women. Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of the Build Strong Women podcast. Thank you so much for being here for this week's episode. It is a special one because it is my first podcast with a guest and I got to interview Asia Whitted and she is amazing. She is smart. She is funny. Her energy is absolutely contagious. You are absolutely going to love her. I can't wait for you to hear this interview. I have to say though that I was absolutely terrified to interview someone on my podcast. I've only done solo episodes And this was my first podcast interviewing someone. So I had to really prepare. I had to understand and learn the logistics of interviewing someone. We did it on video as well. So it was so much fun, but it was terrifying. I think I was sweating the whole week before the interview and then during the whole entire interview as well. But I absolutely loved it. I absolutely loved talking to her and you are going to love this episode. So before we dive in, I want to remind you that over in the show notes, I have a little button at the top that says send us a text. And what that means is if you have a topic that you have been thinking about or something that you have been struggling with that you would love for me to do an episode on, hit that button and then it'll send you to your messages and then you can text me ideas and topics for me to do a podcast episode on. It's really really cool because it's anonymous. It doesn't say your name. I don't get a text to my phone or anything. It goes right to my Buzzsprout, which is my podcast host. And it will just send me a little message saying, here's something that someone sent you. And it'll be topics or things that you just want to hear from me. I really want to help you. I really want to dive into topics that are going to help you become the best version of you and just to help you with your confidence and anything that you need. So head over to the show notes, click that button and send me some ideas for a some podcast episodes. I'd love to hear from you. I'd love to just help you as many ways as I can. So I hope that you'll check that out. And let's dive into this week's episode. So we're going to be talking about the power of pause. And I'm so excited to welcome Asia Whitted to this podcast because Asia is passionate about helping women find moments of calm amidst the chaos of motherhood and amidst the chaos of work and all the things that we deal with every single day. She's here to share practical strategies for incorporating mindfulness and intentionality into our daily lives so that we can show up as the best versions of ourselves at home, at work, and with our families. So get ready to discover how a simple pause can transform your entire day and reclaim your sense of peace and purpose. I can't wait to dive into this episode with you. Here we go. When I first met you and I know it was at Ultimate Product Party and I was listening to some other podcasts that you were on. So I was the same way. I just thought you were so beautiful and your energy is what attracted me to you. Like you just had this energy that is like unmatched. And I just think people just gravitate towards you and your energy, which is like amazing. And that's why you're so good at everything that you do. And I just even seeing you on social media and it's just like you're just like attracted to your smile and your energy. And it's amazing.

SPEAKER_01: 3:56

Thank you. Yeah. Being at UPP definitely was a step a little bit out of my comfort zone. Not a lot of people know this, but I don't mind being background. I love being support to push somebody out there. I'm usually in front of being in front of that many people talking. I'm used to doing that for kids. UPP, I remember before I went up on stage and being like, all right, we're just going to take a big leap of faith and we're going to get up there. I remember talking to Alice said, and I remember Kat being like, well, she can't get up there and do yoga on stage. So what are we going to do? And she was like, well, just figure out, do like a morning, like warmup situation. And I was like, okay, we hope this is what they like. And being on that stage and being, getting up there and be like, Oh wait, this kind of feels good. Like this is really the people I really want to share with are like other moms and other women, but reminding them like they, they matter, but the way they have to like keep forging and doing what they're doing and making the impact because they're all amazing. Like we were in a room with amazing women, like product-based business, like entrepreneurs and founders. I give them so much credit because it's so much that goes into what they do. And so I was amazed with everyone in that room. It just what you do. I need you to take a moment and just like, pause, slow down and just think about yourself, check in with yourself. And so being in front of all you guys gave me just that like, okay, I think we can do this. So it was as big for me, I think of a moment as like people telling me like, that was so important for me. And I was like, it was important for me.

SPEAKER_00: 5:31

Yeah, exactly. Like you were so brave doing that. Like I would be terrified to go up there and be on stage and just, you know, put your heart out there. But you look so comfortable out there the whole time. Like you weren't even scared. You look so confident. Sweating

SPEAKER_01: 5:44

and probably a little shaky, if you would say.

SPEAKER_00: 5:46

Yeah. And that's what I think is so funny. Like when I talk a lot about confidence and stuff like that, and it's like people looking at you thought, probably thought you, this is just what you do. And I just feel so comfortable up here. I'm so confident doing it, but you were really scared inside and people don't know that. You know what I mean? They just think that, oh, she's just so confident. This is what she can do. And it's like, no, she was, maybe she was terrified to do it, but you did it anyway. Right. Exactly. Exactly. So if you just want to like talk a little bit about Yeah, I love it. And what I love

SPEAKER_01: 6:34

also, and you've done an episode already about this, but making sure we're reminded that our self-care isn't always those external things. things and that how we approach self-care doesn't just have to be like you said the spa days or getting our nails done and our hair or like you know going on a vacation like they could be simple things like I love every time I think about like having my tea I think about you and your warm

SPEAKER_02: 6:55

women

SPEAKER_01: 6:56

because that's something you truly enjoy it's for you and so for me I am a probably a serial volunteer so I'm constantly going to be like if someone says hey I have yeah I'm going to help I love I like I love to help I love to support that's just my passion That's my passion. That's my nature. And you can probably find me and I juggle a lot of different things. And I remember back in 2020, when everybody else was going through all the things, we were all like learning to be school teachers and chefs because we were stuck at home. That same year, the beginning of the year, I lost my grandmother. And then her, my grandfather passed like two months after that. I had a half-brother. And so it was just like life on top of like life as a whole was hitting me. But my reaction was, okay, I just got I keep going. Like I've had started a new position. We had moved. And so like on the outside, it looked like there were all these great things. I gave my TED talk. So like it was all these amazing things, but also some really hard. things that were happening, but I just, I just kept like going. And you talked about my walk. I love to go outside and walk and I've always been a journaler. So I was doing those things, but I wasn't slowing down and I wasn't really taking time to be like, okay, this is my check-in. This is how I'm feeling. This is what I need. And I think it was just a combination of grief, burnout, exhaustion. It all hit all at once. And I was on a walk and I broke down crying, like could not explain it, wished it would have been sometime where it was like nobody it was like packed park I'm just sitting here bawling my eyes out in those sunglasses so it's like very evident I'm having to break down here and I remember talking to a friend and she was like and she's she's a clinical psychologist thank god she was like have you talked to somebody maybe therapy might be a cool idea and I was like you know what She was like, even if it's just like, just look at the group. She said, I'm not saying anything's wrong. And I am a big advocate for therapy. Whether you feel like you need it for something you're going through or just as a, hey, this is a way to process emotions and have that person in that safe space where you can just verbally, I'm a verbal processor. So if I can just go talk to someone because I'm nine times out of 10, I'm not going to share it with like a whole bunch of people because I don't want to dump. I want you to come to me, but I'm not going to give that. I don't want to create weight And so I remember we talked, we did like our first console. I think we are maybe only on our second session. And she saw me, she was like, okay, you have a lot of things going on. She said, but what are you doing for yourself? Like, when do you stop? And I was like, oh yeah, well, I do this. And she's like, that's for your husband. I do this. And she's like, well, that really benefits your kids. She kept like, and I kept giving her all these things. I was like, well, sometimes I'll, I'll go get a facial or a massage. And she said, well, do you really relax? And I'm like, well, I kind of think about like my grocery list or plan out my week while I'm on the table. She was like, what? She's like, before you can even go through these emotions, you have to slow down, stop and feel. And I was like, oh, And so it started that fall of 2020 and it took probably for the next two years, I really tapped into, okay, I have to slow down. And so I started planning like, okay, these are the things I want to do for myself every day. And I remember like, I would put in on my to-do list, journal. I want to read every day. I want to move my body. I want to drink this much water. I need to take my vitamins. And it seemed really silly, but I was like, these are the things that help me feel good. And I need to get these done every single day. And then I made, I'm a paper girl So I made my little like tracker, I printed it out, check them off. And so I started, I was like, and so then it started to become a habit. And so then I could kind of cross it off. So, you know, walking every day, that's going to happen. I still put it on my to-do list just so I don't overdo my to-do because it's something that's still an essential to me. But it took those two years. I started back getting into mindfulness. I was a day, I'm a, I have a degree in dance education. When I was in undergrad, of course we did mind body connection. We learned about all these mindfulness tools and I have probably just put them in my back pocket and forgot about them and then in that moment I was like oh okay and so I would get to my mat and I enjoy yoga but I don't need to do it for a long period 10 minutes on my mat if I can do a few good stretches that centers me I like the stillness and the quiet because I am I tend to be a little high energy I tend to be on the go so that was good enough for me and so I went got my certification for yoga at that time I thought I was like I'm gonna go back I'm gonna start teaching yoga as funny as it sounds it was it wasn't the movement, it was that quiet and the slowing down that really resonated with me. And because I've always worked with children, I started to see how overwhelmed they were. And I was like, okay, maybe it's kids. And I was doing a lot of content for kids and for moms. And then the more I did it, the more I would have moms kind of be like, oh, I know this was for like my kids, but it really helped me. And really seeing, yes, it's great if I can go take kids for an hour or 45 minutes and I give them these tools, but if they go back home and mom is so burned out and exhausted and she's snapping and she's short and she can't regulate her own emotions that does nothing they're with me they're with miss asia 45 minutes to an hour They're with mom all week. And so really seeing that need and being like, the people I really want to reach are moms. Because if I can reach mom, then I can reach kids. And then that trickles down. And so not only is it starting here, we're starting to get these healthy habits over the course. So I started kind of re-gearing and shifting to how can I serve moms? And how can I help them find space to, one, prioritize themselves? Because that was really the big thing about my pause was remembering to prioritize myself. Not forget about everything, but just take that little moment, just a little perspective shift. And I always say it took those two years of what I thought were really, really hard to hold me up because 2022, I lost my dad, I lost my father-in-law, and it was like back to back. And I was like, if I truly believe between prayer, therapy, and my thoughts, I did not have those three things. We wouldn't be talking. I'd be a little cuckoo crazy somewhere, but it really took me that time of like, and so I remember like going through grief again and that being the biggest. and be like, okay, I've done this. Not as big on the scale, but I've done this. having those tools in my toolbox. And so I always compare like whatever your toolbox is, whether it's music, journaling, movement, you may not want yoga. You may want to have a dance party. You may like Zumba or kickboxing or, you know, I don't know, cardio. You may want to run. I'm not a runner. You may like to run. Whatever's in your toolbox. You just want to use them. And so I was really grateful for those two years where I had to put the work in for me and then being able to share and being able to tell Like when I come and meet a mom who is overwhelmed, like, hey, I've been where you've been. I still have my days where I get overwhelmed. But this is what I'm doing, not just then, but this is what I'm having to do every single day. I still have to choose my own pause. I still have to plan for my pause when things get busy. And that's what I really appreciate about your podcast is because you're giving women tools that are easily accessible and they're practical. So no matter where they are and wherever they may be in life, it's something that they can take and apply and use and put to use and then show that and then actually like model that for their kids because that's really what we want to do. We want to be good for ourselves, but we want to be good for them because we're wanting to raise good, strong women.

SPEAKER_00: 14:30

Yes, absolutely. And that's why I feel like what you're sharing is so important because so many women, they're so busy and I'm a teacher, so I work with burnt out teachers daily I think of you and I'm like how can we teach these women that are working full-time because you know there's a lot of people online that you know they have businesses and work but like we are working another job full-time and how do we just find those moments where we can pause and how do we remind ourselves like okay I need to pause because sometimes we'll just go go go go go you know what I mean and get overwhelmed and then just crash at the end of the night how do you like you stop yourself or catch yourself and say okay I need to pause

SPEAKER_01: 15:07

yeah it's a check-in so part of like my pause framework is like one, just even for sometimes it's just that acknowledging the fact that I have, I am a priority because that's a mindset shift for so many women. Like we've, depending on how you've grown up, you might've seen women take on everything and carry it and share and do and pour out to everyone else. And then they go home depleted or they don't have enough for themselves. And we're in a space where hustle culture is a big thing. So it's hard to even take into the idea of, I'm a priority and I can slow down and I can rest. Like rest is a really big thing for me. And I believe we were created to rest. And so that's that first thing. But then one big thing I do is like, I actually just ask myself some hard questions. Where am I? How am I feeling? Like if you could even, I tell moms, if you don't know where to start, start with that. You get up in the morning, how am I feeling? Because we will get up, we'll say, we'll wake up kids. We'll go start breakfast. We'll go answer an email. We'll get on the phone. We'll plan our day. We'll start and do so many things. And we never suddenly be like, Hey, how do I feel? Because that's going to add, that's going to add on to how I show up for my kids. That's going to how I show up, how you show up for your students, for those other coworkers that you're interacting with. Like I still work a full-time job and it's crazy because I get on at 6 AM every morning. So I'm up and I work in logistics. And so I have drivers and customers and stores that are asking me things. And so as soon as I get on at six, I have someone asking me things. Usually it's about 40 people who have asked me things. And so If before I get up, when I get up and it's not mall, it is literally, it can be, okay, get up at the edge of the bed and I'll usually go and I'll turn on my kettle so I can make myself tea because that's like one of my things. It's just, it's good to have some ginger tea in the morning. Asia, how do you feel today? And just do that quick mental check. Maybe throughout the middle of the day when you're about to go to lunch, if you get a lunch break. I found so many women who don't take lunch breaks and I'm just saying you need that break. Even if it's 15 minutes, just take that break and then say, where am I now? What do I need? You know, do I need to like go call a friend and laugh? Do I need to find something? Do I need to watch a funny TikTok? Thank God it's still there. Like, what do I need? What do I need to do? Do I need to look at the 35 TikToks my daughter sent me throughout her day? Like, what do I need in this moment? Do I need to laugh? Do I maybe even need to cry? And that's okay. Have I eaten today? Did I drink my water? Because we'll feel terrible, but we don't do those simple things. Like just those simple, basic, you know, like I feel so drained. well what are you eating or have you ate did you you know what are you putting in your body and so sometimes it can just be those practical questions as a start and a foundation and then what I've found is once I start doing that my body will start to signal and I even talked about this today like my body will start to tell me oh I can feel I can feel me approach and I always call I'm about to hit a wall I can feel me approaching that wall and so three years ago I was completely able to I would get headfirst into the wall and be like, oh, and now I may be here on a, you know, and be like, oh, maybe what else is on the week? I need to kind of relax. Maybe I need to put in some time where I have a day where I don't have anything on, you know, on my schedule. I do that now where if I look on my week and I see like, okay, this happened, even if it's like stuff for my kids. They have this this night. I have a meeting this day. Okay. Thursday, I can't do anything. I just need to leave because I know I'm going to be. And so giving yourself those little boundaries, which is a word that sometimes we think is ugly, but it's really good. And it's really for our protection, we can put some boundaries around our time and our energy

SPEAKER_00: 18:58

will feel better. I love that idea of looking at your calendar and like writing it in and not there's no excuses, you know, make it a non negotiable to do something for yourself. And like, you talk about like, just those little things like taking a walk or looking, you know, scrolling, even if it's looking at pictures of your kids for two seconds, you know what I mean? Just writing it in. Writing down those little things that you know that help you feel good. You know tea helps you feel good. Like you said, I love lemon water. It's just finding those little things and not everyone has the same things. You really have to prioritize making a list of all the things that make you feel good and putting them in through your day, all day long. It's just going to help you

SPEAKER_01: 19:33

feel

SPEAKER_00: 19:33

better.

SPEAKER_01: 19:34

And even like one thing when I was working at my job and we were in space and I loved it because I had like one of this picture that says like powerful female. And then we moved and we saw that office. And so it's not set up. But I remember holding on to it. I was like that, that picture, that piece of artwork in my office that made me feel good. I had little other pictures that were like affirmations and had cute saying because I could see it at work. And so I'm a big advocate for even having setting up your workspace so like on my desk I have a picture like I have a picture of me and my dad I have a picture of me and my husband and my kids I used to keep a candle I'll have like little affirmation cards like whatever it is it's just things that are there I also love music so when I get to the office I literally have a ritual I turn I make sure my I got the light on I light my candle I turn on my music it's It is a given. When I was in office by myself, they would be like, are you taking film? My music's not on yet. It sets my surroundings. And so it would either be like, sometimes it was very chill, mellow music and some lo-fi. And then sometimes it was old seventies. Like it just depends. But like I would, and because I'm talking to customers all day, I have those days where I have someone and they're really ugly

SPEAKER_02: 20:59

and

SPEAKER_01: 21:00

it makes me, it gets me out of that like nice peaceful spot. So, I know my music. Okay. Let me find some fun music. Let me watch something funny. I will, I will pull up a random person on YouTube, like a comedian. And that helps me. And it may seem like, you know, Oh, well that's not, that's not mindfulness. You're not on a yoga mat. You're not meditating, but it is like, it's that awareness of I'm aware of where my emotions are. I'm aware of my needs in that moment. And in that moment, I need to laugh. And however that comes. that's what we're going to do so I think it's those things

SPEAKER_00: 21:32

I love that and I watched your TED talk and you know talking about pausing for women to take care of themselves but also pausing your TED talk was amazing by the way that's so cool I can't even take it but just like pausing for your kids too and like I listened to that I'm like oh my gosh like that's so good you know what I mean when you know you're getting upset even like before we were recording my daughter she had the basketball game tonight and I'm like searching for her uniform and being whatever and I'm like getting all flustered because I don't know we're doing this and I'm like I don't have time for this but I'm like I just need to I came in my room and I shut the door and I'm like, I just need to take a deep breath. It's going to be okay. And just pause for a minute. But doing that with our kids too is huge.

SPEAKER_01: 22:11

And that was, it's funny because when I did that talk, I knew it was like parenting has always been something significant and intentional for me. Even before like I knew pause and even before it was a word that like was something that I was living with. I said that and it was literally at the end. And for me, it was with my daughter. I will tell everybody my daughter is like that. best mirror sometimes I don't like to look at it but like they show us so much and I've learned so much as she's gotten older and even modeling certain behaviors or she may get really anxious and overwhelmed and I'm like babe you can take a break and she's like and I remember the first time she told me well you don't and it wasn't even like a like you you don't it was really like a well I never see you take a break so I should be able to and the way that hit me because I could see her struggling I could see her overwhelmed and anxious and dealing with anxiety. But the reason she felt like she had to was because she was looking at me. who also was doing the same thing. And so I always think about what am I showing them and what am I teaching them with my actions, not so much my words. And it is so important, but also can be so hard to remember to just pause. So while you were looking for a basketball uniform, I was looking for a phone charger. And so I'm upstairs in like my little like space and I was like, okay, I'm gonna get my chargers downstairs, I'll grab hers. Well, I can't find hers. Like, where is her charger? And I'm like, you know what? It's okay. Just go downstairs and grab yours. And so it was even those little things. But like, we've, we've gotten to the point of with my daughter, she'll be 15 this month, like in two weeks. When's her birthday? The 17th. My son's is the 18th. How funny. It's interesting because with her, as she's grown up, she's seen me, me evolve as a mom, as a person. And so how I parent her has changed, but it's also really cool because my son is, we have this gap. So my son is seven, seven and a half. And so when he grew up, he grew up in this stage of mommy slowing me down. He grew up with listening to me pausing. He grew up with, seeing mommy on her mat in the morning on like a Saturday when I'm not up at six. He saw those things. For him, he'll say, mommy, I need a moment or mommy, I need a pause. And so he's getting language and it just shows me how important that is to just show them and practice it with them. And then sometimes we'll mess up and there are still times where I blow up and I get overwhelmed and I have to come back. And one big thing I really think parents should do is apologize. It's hard and It may not be something you were used to growing up, but I really see like when I know, okay, I missed it on that one. Let me go back and apologize. And that also, what I've learned is that also helps with that mom guilt. Because in those moments when we do feel like, you know, hey, I wish I would have reacted differently. It beats us up just as much as it does them. And so when I take that moment to pause, go back and just say, hey, Sometimes it is. I'm just overwhelmed. I'm really tired. Even saying that with my kids. Mommy's had a long day. When we get home, give me 10 minutes. Give me five minutes. And it gives them the permission to for them to as they get older, whether that's in a relationship with a coach, with a friend. I need a moment. And being able to say that because they've seen it. And they know it's okay. And they don't feel guilty about, you know, requesting what they need. And

SPEAKER_00: 25:43

it gives them the courage to do it too. Absolutely. I totally agree with you. Being okay with apologizing and not being, you know, don't have such pride where I can't say that she should say that or he should say that. No, you need to model that for them, just like you said. That's amazing. I know. And especially having daughters, I'm always so conscientious about how I'm talking to myself and, you know, treating myself and all those things. And that didn't happen right away. When I first had my daughter, it wasn't like this. oh, I'm going to change the way I show. It was like over time, I'm like, oh my gosh, I really need to show her, you know, what confidence looks like. And I didn't really have a lot of confidence, so I had to work on myself. You know what I mean? And it's just, I want her to know, and my son also, that it just takes work every single day. Learn these little strategies like taking a pause and all of those things. I just think it's just so important. I just feel so passionate about teaching women how to do this so that they can teach their kids too. And about the pause for ourselves and using it in parenting it's just this huge thing I just it's really awesome you're doing good things I love it I love it okay so um I want to ask you a little bit about your own confidence journey because everyone has a different story and on the outside like we talked about when you I saw you on stage I'm like oh my gosh she's the most confident woman ever have you always been that confident do you work on yourself with your confidence and I don't know just how do you navigate like being a confident woman and like showing your children the way yeah

SPEAKER_01: 27:06

I will say for For me, I feel like one thing I've learned and it is something that I either read it or I listened to it on like a podcast, but confidence is seasonal. And so for the most part, I feel like I've known who I was, but there's definitely been seasons where I was not as comfortable in stepping fully into that. And I will definitely say over the last two years, it's taken me, it's been ebbs and flows, even with pause. Like I can even get this. When I first started and I wanted to first start sharing mindfulness tips, I really did not want, I wanted to be like a faceless account. I was just going to put out like cute graphics. two little words about mindfulness. And it was just part of me being like, okay, no one's ever known me for this. And if I share my side of this, now I'm gonna have to really share my story. Now I'm really gonna have to share how I even got to this. Because up until this point, you've known me for dance. You've known me, of course, for like, it were kids and all those types of things. But where's this mindfulness coming? And so for, it took me a good six months before I really was like, okay, let me share my story. And that was when I was like, I felt like it started to catch on and things started to make sense. So even with that, it was definitely a journey of, okay, I'm going to sit in this. I'm going to take this step and I'm just going to try. And so that I was very, I was very unsure of myself at that moment. And so with each new thing, it takes time. So I will, I'm easy to, and I like recording a video and I'll throw a reel out. But then when it comes to doing live, I hate doing them. But I also know I need, that's something I want to do. And I know that's another way to serve people. And so yeah, For me, when it comes to those moments when I do feel really unsure or scared, one thing I'm trying to do is ask, for what reason am I doing this? Why am I going after whatever this goal is? Why am I trying this new thing? And trying to remember that sometimes even doing it scared allow someone else to see that it can be done. And so for me, my daughter is uber confident one. She's always she's been who she is.

SPEAKER_00: 29:27

She's super confident. She's, she's a cheerleader, right?

SPEAKER_01: 29:30

Yes. Forever. But there are times when I see her kind of go into her shell. And so that's when I'm like, okay, I like when I see that having those conversations with her and be like, Hey, it's okay. Let's talk through this. What are you feeling? Why are you feeling a little unsure of your But then for my son, he is very much the observer. He's a little more. He's going to look. He's going to watch. It's going to take him a little longer to crack open. And so like over this last year, we've had a lot of conversations with him about being confident and whether that's even within school. Like I love he has an amazing teachers. Teachers are so important. I commend all teachers. I love teachers. He has an amazing. teacher and one of her goals for him this year had nothing to do with like his reading his math she was like I just want him to be more confident I want him to like answer like questions and be confident in it and if it gets wrong also be okay ask me questions she said because I see him and I see his little brain going and I know he's thinking he's always engaged she said like he's sitting up there with like looking at me with his big eyes and she said I know there's a lot going on she said but I want him to be able to like really you know raise his hand and be be confident in that. And as a mom, like I was literally awesome. I love you. What do you need? I know. That's amazing. And I'm sure like you get to see it like in your classroom. My kids that you're saying that Maybe that little boost. And so if for no other reason, if I can just conquer my fear, whatever it is, if it's a big thing, if it's a little thing, because that shows someone else that they can do it.

SPEAKER_00: 31:07

There's different areas you're confident. You can be confident in one area, but not in another area. That's another thing. You know, you're not just confident in every area of your life. Right. But it's important outside your comfort zone. Like you said, it's, it's everything you have to do it.

SPEAKER_01: 31:20

And I think the more you do it and the more you show yourself, Hey, I did this, I did this hard thing, or, Hey, I did this before. And yeah, I was scared, but I did it. And it had a good turnout or maybe it didn't. And you learned a lesson, but having that evidence for yourself, because our brain is always going to like, neurologically, it's going to tell us, Oh no, you can't do this. It's going to come up with all these reasons why we can't. And it's going to get, look for evidence of why we can't. We can't. And so I'm a big part. Like one reason I love journaling is because I can write down all these great things and I can write down whether that's through a gratitude practice, whether it's just a kind of brain dump. These things, these are moments when I was scared and I did it and it had a great outcome. So every time I go to do something new and I'm a little nervous or terrified or like shaking or going in front of a new crowd, like, hey, remember you did it this time and this time and this time. And so that's a little confident boost. And it goes back to what you were saying, like how we're talking to ourself. It matters. All those things come and they connect. So if we're having that good, positive self-talk, it also helps. helps us as we're building our confidence.

SPEAKER_00: 32:27

Yeah, you love affirmations like I love affirmations. I know, I have a whole Pinterest board of affirmations and positive quotes and everything like that. So your coaching and your mindfulness, what is like your vision?

SPEAKER_01: 32:40

I would love to grow it to where so for me, the biggest thing is for women to feel seen, because I feel like a lot of times we don't feel seen, especially as moms, we're carrying all of this invisible load, we're doing all this thankless work. And so sometimes we we carry that and Sometimes it can build into bitterness or resentful. I want them to feel seen and safe and then feel like they can come to me or wherever I am and be supported. And so as much as I love like the coaching and the one-on-ones in the groups, my favorite thing is just getting women in a space. And like, I just, I love, I love that and seeing women come together. And so on occasion, I'll do like a little pop-up class where women can come and be virtual is great, but I love being in person, but I think law, like big women, wise we'd be like having it to where when we kind of like a UPP because I felt like UPP was great because it was a room full of great women that were truly supporting each other

SPEAKER_00: 33:35

you're gonna do something big like I could totally see you doing that absolutely

SPEAKER_01: 33:39

I love that come and be fed into whether it's, and even not even just like a whole bunch of yoga, like just somewhere where they can come and be refueled and refreshed, have good food and somewhere where it's pretty. So we can walk outside, take a pause because that's important. Like just to, to take away and refuel reset and then go back because the whole purpose is so that they can keep making an impact in their families and their businesses. So I think that would be like the large scale spaces for women to come. and so right now it's like in these little pockets of like coaching or doing things like this like on podcasts just sharing that for every woman listening you matter and you deserve rest and care and I hope you pause and so that you can you can beat burnout because I think that's another thing is we're so prone to getting to doing so good and then we just burn out and there's so much more in us that we don't get to get out and put out into the world and it's just because we're so exhausted

SPEAKER_00: 34:37

yeah oh I love it I love your message I love everything that you share where can like people find you because I know they're going to love you as soon as they hear this because you're amazing and you've helped me so much and I have loved getting to know you and just seeing your energy it just makes me feel good and just learning from you too it's awesome you're doing such good things yeah so where can people find you and connect with you everywhere and work with you

SPEAKER_01: 35:01

I am Asian with a Z because my mom wanted some pizzazz, I guess. I love it. On Instagram, I think that's also probably also on TikTok. I am learning to love threads. Threads has really sent me all of the women who enjoy wellness, books and outdoors. So yeah, so you can find me on Instagram and it's got my newsletter. So I have a newsletter. It's biweekly because every once every week was killing me And I was being inconsistent. So I want to be consistent. But I'll put newsletters out into your inbox with tips and sometimes funny stories.

SPEAKER_00: 35:42

Yeah, your newsletter is great. It gives really good tips and ideas and stories. I really love your newsletter. It's good.

SPEAKER_01: 35:48

Thank you. So yeah, get on the newsletter. You'll find all the things. I'm adding more like free resources and templates so you can put it into action. That's important. That'd be great.

SPEAKER_00: 35:59

That's good. Well, thank you so much for being here. I've loved it. Thank you so much. This was so fun. This was my first interview ever and you're amazing and I am so happy that you are here with me. You did

SPEAKER_01: 36:09

a fabulous job.

SPEAKER_00: 36:11

Thank you.