18 Pounds Down & Loving the Group Program- A Conversation with my client Kathy

Listen in as my client Kathy and I had a honest and fun conversation about her experience losing 18 pounds in my Small Group Coaching Program.

She talks about how her first experience with me was by listening to this podcast and she loved what she heard.

She shares why she joined my small group program, how she joined even though she was pretty discouraged with herself and her weight at first.

She gives you a peek into how powerful it is to be in a group of women who all share similar goals and struggles.

It's a great one, enjoy!

Interested in learning more about how to work with me?  Click HERE.

Interested in working with me? Find my website here: https://courtneygraycoaching.com/workwithme

Transcript

Unknown: 0:06

Music. Welcome to Modern body, modern life, the podcast for women who want to lose weight permanently, feel in control around food and learn how to stop obsessing about their body and food, a modern way of thinking about your weight, your body and your life includes mindset. I'm body and life coach, Courtney Gray, and each week I'm going to teach you the mindset tools that are necessary for changing the way you eat forever. We will uncover why you're eating when you said you were going to stop, what to do when you're really craving something, and how important it is to decide what you want to believe is possible for you. I believe we can get in the best shape of our lives at any age, a modern body, a modern life, all starts in your mind, and when you learn how to manage that, losing weight permanently becomes so much easier. Welcome to the podcast. I am excited to tell you that I have one of my clients on the podcast today. Her name is Kathy, and the reason I've asked her to be on this podcast is she is one of the amazing women in my small group coaching program. I am going to be opening enrollment at the beginning of December for a group, actually three groups, that are going to be starting in January. So I asked Kathy to come on the podcast to share her experience being in a group coaching program. Because for a lot of people, they've never been in a group coaching program, and you might be like, what is it like? And you can hear from me, but I really wanted you to hear from one of my amazing clients, her experience and everything. So Kathy, welcome to the podcast. Thank you so much. Thanks for having me. Yes, I'm happy to have you. So I would love for you to just to kind of introduce yourself and kind of say why you decided to join the program. Okay, so my name is Kathy, and I'm a recently retired nurse, and I've had a few years of some circumstances, COVID caregiving, a daughter. I had a little short scare with cancer. I'm fine, but you know, there were some life circumstances that derailed my attention to myself, the result being a lot of weight gain. So, you know, I've, I've been successful with other programs, but the older I get, it's like, you know, I'm not going to adhere to these diets. I already know myself enough. Like, I can, I'm, I'll do great while I'm in it. Because I, I'm, I'm able to go all in, but it's not sustainable. Yeah, so anyway, I was discouraged for a long time, kind of, you know, dabbling and listening to podcasts, you know, researching food plans, blah blah blah, ad infinitum, right? I love the blah blah blah. It's so true, isn't it? It is. And, you know, meanwhile just being really discouraged. So it's like, Man, am I gonna find what I need, right? Yeah. So this is a little bit about me too. It was that, you know, I really prayed about it, like, God, I know you can lead me to the help that I need. And so I listened to your podcast once, and then I listened listen to more. And there was, you know, your approach was so uh, it just gave me some hope and and it was so real, like, it's not a diet. So those were magic words. I'm not interested in a diet. I'm interested in changing the way I eat in my relationship with food. Yeah. So anyway, you know, after some time, I'm like, okay, throughout the inventory, invitation on a podcast to join your one of your group. So I did it, yeah, and I, and it's so I finished your one session. You know, your first session, beginner session, yeah, and, and we just had our first session of the advanced group that I joined also. So because I was getting traction and really wanted to keep going, yeah. So I would love for you to share how much you lost in the first three month group. In the first three month group, I lost 16. But I have to Confession is, is that I did your pre grant game challenge, and that was good, yeah? So, you know, you were like, you know, some of you aren't going to want to wait a week. That's just like me. I'm impatient. Now once, once I buy in, I want to go in, right? Yeah, me too. Me too. It was either one or two weeks before the session started, and you said, if you could do just one thing, make one tweak in your life, and you and you can stick with it, then, then do that. So I did that. I decided no eating at night after dinner, which was a total problem area, right? So many people, right? Oh yeah, and yeah, that's been for ever and ever, amen. But so anyway, so I stopped eating after dinner, and I was able to do it. So I came in with a, you know, pounds down, a couple of pounds, yeah. So I lost 14, I guess, in the program I lost. 16 total. I want to tell all the listeners that when, for a lot of people, when they join my program, the program might not start right away, just like Kathy talking about she joined and the program didn't officially start. The first call together didn't start for two weeks. So when people join my program, I send them a video, and I call it optional pre work, because Kathy and I are very similar. When I pay I'm like, let's go. I'm like, ready to start, right? And so I'm going to be launching my January programs at the beginning of December. So people might be like, I'm so fired up and I just invested in myself. I want to go. So there is, like, a optional pre work where I just basically, what you just said is, you described it beautifully. Is like, if you could do one thing, make one change, really focus on one thing. What would you do? Let's do that. And so I love that you even brought up the pre work. Some women don't do it, but I always find that when the group starts, there's a handful of women that are like, I did the pre work, and I've lost a few pounds already, and they're really, yeah, and that's without all the tools, you know, and then you and then we get in the program, and we're, you know, developing these new skills and have tools to help us. So, yeah, it was good. So then I and then it's okay. So we started last night, and I plateaued while, you know, on a very short break, but I got on the scale this morning, just for kicks. I always weigh myself on Wednesday and Sunday morning. I don't know. I try not to get too obsessed on the scale, but those two days, right? And I was down two pounds, so I'm, like, so excited. So, so that's 18 total. So good. I'm so proud of you, and I'm so happy for you. And so Kathy joined my so I have a, you know, a small group coaching program, and I've talked about it a little bit on the podcast, but what started happening is I would have this 12 week group coaching program, and women loved it so much that they were like, I want to keep going. I want to keep going, either to lose, continue losing more weight, or I want to keep going, like, practicing these tools and expanding and going to my own next level, right? It's almost kind of like, I'm loving this. I don't want to stop so I started an advanced group, and Kathy just started the advanced group with a bunch of other women. So that's what she's talking about. Just so fun. I'm just so happy to have you in there. Thank you so much. Shannon, it's a really a fun group. I'm really going to look forward to what I learned from them, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So tell me why. So have you ever done anything like this before, not with this approach? You know, I've done Weight Watchers, and I was successful with that. And then, you know, I just can't adhere to that kind of a plan. It's just not realistic. You know, I loved when you were pitching the program, like, it's not a diet, and you can have the things, yeah, you can't have chocolate, you can drink wine, you know, and lose weight permanently. Why do you think that this works for you, because I've come to realize, you know, like so many things, it's the thought work. Yeah, the thought work is the distinction in your program and the fact that you're not telling us what to eat, which I love too. Oh, I'm so glad you love that. Because some women are like, I've heard so many women say, just please tell me what to eat. I'm like, No, that's not actually the problem, you know, you think, yeah, well, and you're, you know, one of your concepts, take radical ownership. You're a grown up, take responsibility for what you're putting into your mouth. Yeah, you know, you are a resource, and there's other resources to find out what to eat if you're if that's a problem, right? So anyway, I really like that, like, I know you challenged us to do better and eat better, and that is what I have done. But I'm still myself. I'm still uniquely me, and I have things that I've eaten over time, you know? And it's it. I may say goodbye to that some of those things, and I may not. I love it so and and I can lose weight while still being true to myself, yeah, because we all are so different, right? We all have different you know, even just if we think about it like, we all want to eat differently. I've had, I've had vegans and vegetarians and people who intermittent fast, people who don't, people that drink, people that don't want to drink. And I've had some people say, I really want to start working out, which we'll talk to you, because I know that that's something you've been doing. But then I also have other clients that they literally like, I only want to focus on the food and the thought work. I don't want to work out. I don't have capacity for that. And then they end up, you know, losing weight. And then they they get to a point where they're like, I think I'm ready to start working out. So yeah, for me to say, this is how you need to eat, or this is a boot camp and this is the workout we're doing, it's just not sustainable. Oh yeah. If you're doing the work and you're giving that kind of margin to grow in these other areas, I think it just kind of organically happens. If you are to use your quote going all in and on yourself, right? You're going to discover maybe ways of thinking that are not serving you anymore, and you're ready to change those things. Yeah. Did you have any hesitations in the beginning? Because I know for a lot of time, people are like, I'm going to join but I'm like, I've had people say, This is my last attempt. Did you have anything? Well, I you know it's an unknown. Anytime you're you don't know what the results going to be, even if you do go all in, you know you represent. And some hope. And that was good, that was a hook, and I and I was, I came in a little discouraged. So that's not over. That's not really a good stance to come in from. So that changed over time. I just like, Okay, well, I'm just going to, going to power through, you know, I'm going to just start doing the work. Why were you discouraged? Because we know, I teach, you know, I teach is that we feel discouraged because of a thought. So what were, what were your thoughts that were making you feel discouraged? Like, what the heck, man, what did I do to myself? No, you know, like, how did I get here? Yeah, so, like, that's hard to, you know, I've had to work on that and process, you know, learn how to, like, love myself, where I'm at but, um, but that's real. I mean, that was some of that was, I'm not myself right now, yeah, but you don't go into these programs because on the top of your game, right? Well, coming because you need help. So, yeah. So that's why I'm really glad you, you know, are vulnerable enough to say that, because I think that a lot of women feel like I'm, you know, I'm interested in joining the program, but I feel like I'm not sure if it's going to work for me, and then I'm so I'm not going to join it. So I love to hear people saying no, like, I wasn't sure. I was discouraged. I was questioning. I've never done anything like this, but I still decided to go all in. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, work it, if work it, so, yeah, work it because you're worth it. That's a recovery. Saying I love it. That's true. What has been Do you think the hardest part for you? I think the hardest part is, is recognizing this is the hardest, and the best part of it is that this is a process. And deciding, I don't like to use the word resigning, even though that's kind of how it feels like some at some time that it's going to take time, like I did not get here overnight. Yeah, you know, this is not a magic pill. This is not a, you know, you're not waving a wand over me to make everything all better, right? Yeah, it's and it's going to take time. So I think that's been, like, the biggest challenge, and, you know, and I'm really working through that, and how I look at it, yeah, you know, and reframing it to like, What other choice do I have? This is a good path, and I'm going to stay on this path. It's serving me and I and it will serve me. So yeah, and tell me about working out, because I know that that was something that you really up leveled in the very beginning, you said you really wanted to start moving more and working out. So tell me about that. Oh, yeah. So, you know, extra weight is a drag to haul around when you're doing you start working out, right? And so just to give you a some background of my in my youth, yeah, I was an ace personal trainer, you know. And how that came about. It kind of reminded me of you. Is, I was working out in the gym. I was doing good, but I need, I was like, I needed some extra help, right? So I hired a trainer, and then I did so well that the owner of the gym recognized how well I was doing and said, Would you consider being a trainer here? Oh, I love it. I said, Well, don't I need to be certified, and this is with the nursing background already, so that, like that combo was really good business wise. So anyway, so I got certified with a really reputable certification them, and I just did really good. So anyway, top of my game in my 40s, top fitness level, and I was always pretty athletic as a young person anyway, so, you know, so I'm going from that level to over time, got a divorce, that was a big hit on my self image, and then some of these other things. Okay, I'm not, I'm not excusing my decision making ability, but that's how I chose, you know, I got some overuse injuries, blah, blah, blah. So the end result, you know, fast forward to now, I'm 65 and I'm like, What the heck, man, this is not the body I want to keep going in, right? Yeah. So anyway, so that I think that adds an extra layer of overcoming where I've been, you know what I'm saying? Like, okay, well, that was then. And you know, you know, you you can be strong, you know, you have that capacity. Yeah. Did you better? Way better. Yeah. So anyway, so, you know, I just started walking more, and so it's I do most days, an hour of either walking or cycling, and then I'm throwing in weights. But I have so my for this session, advanced session. One of the things I'm how I'm going to up level is I'm going to join the gym down the street, and I'll start using free doing free weights again. I love it and and twice a week. And I, and I already know from experience that doing weights makes you feel better. Oh, it does. It really does, if there's like, an endorphin there. So, so, you know, I don't know why I procrastinated that, except that, like, I want to do, I don't want to, like, because this is because I can be an all or nothing, then I can hurt myself. So I'm like, I'm not going to do that this time. So that's why I've been like, you know, I've stayed pretty consistent with these practices, cycling in and walking an hour and. And so now I'm going to add that the weights, and I know that's going to totally bump my fitness level, and probably the weight loss too. I love it. Yeah, you're ready for that. I love it. Do you feel like? Because I think a lot of women, when they start getting in, like, especially, I've seen it for many women, like, late 50s and on, there's almost this, like, I I'm past the time of getting in my best shape. I'm there's almost, for some reason, the late 50s. It's like, it's too late. Oh yeah, yeah. That's the, that's the BS talk, self talk. Okay, that is really why I agreed to come on here. Is that, you know, what is that, if I can give someone of my age, I'm 65 Yeah, gray hair, not the old gray Mary, what she used to be. But you know what, man, I can do great and and so can anybody else of my age. There is hope. You can do better. We are living longer. So how do you want to live? How do you want to live the rest of your life? Yeah? Like having mobility problems because you didn't move your body, your joints hurt because you're, you know, super heavy, and you can't get up off the chair or the toilet or whatever. Anyway, that's when you're a nurse. You talk like that, yeah, but it's real talk. I love it. First of all, you have beautiful hair, but isn't that interesting that like, I wonder why, and I think it's just a societal norm. At some point we just kind of go that's not available for me anymore. And I just really think that's one of the things I want to do with this modern body modern life podcast, is really change like, like, we get to decide at any age where we are going to be in terms of our fitness, in terms of our fashion, in terms of what we decide is important Absolutely. And we live in an ageist society too. So, you know, we're women and we're older, so society is not really kind to our demographic. Like you say, put your fist up. Like, you know, no, I don't have to buy that with society saying I'm going to take care of myself, and, you know, be the best version of myself I can be. And since we are part of a society, and there's so many of us, that we just need to start taking ourselves seriously and start changing what we really believe is possible. And it's not just women that are 65 like I know, so I just became an empty nester. I'm 47 but there's a little bit of and I've even talked to some of my friends, there's a little bit of a Okay, well, what do I even do with myself? I'm an empty nester. What do I do? But it's not a what do I do from a place of this is so exciting and expansive, it's what do I do? Like I'm limited, and that's just so not true. Yeah, there you go, yeah, the self limiting beliefs, yeah, that we adopt, yeah. So that's why the thought work is so important. Just like develop new ways of thinking, right? Our brains are neuro plastic, and so, you know, we have grooves right in our brain of how we thought. And like some you talk about that and teach some of that about, you know, change. How about challenging those thoughts? Yeah, you can believe differently about yourself. Yeah, and your future. What are some of the feelings you have had to feel in my program that maybe in the past you weren't willing to feel, because we know that in order to do hard things right, in order for you to get that gym membership and start going, there's going to be feelings that come up. If you in order to not eat at night, you have to sit with the negative feelings. What are some of the feelings you have had to go, Okay, let's do this. Oh, yeah. Sometimes I can get fiendishly hungry, like I have to have something, you know? You have to look at that like, back off, girl. You know, I mean, just recognizing that and sitting with that for a while. You're teaching us about that right now, about, you know, living with discomfort, yeah, and that's such a great skill for all of life. Yeah, I would say sitting with that discomfort of, you know, changing how I've done things for a long time. Yes, you know, I'm used to doing that. I'm used to doing my life this way, but I think that I got to the point where the cost is weight. It's too costly for me now, yeah. So I'm just like, ready to go, Yeah, and look where it's got me to give into. I have to have that right now feeling, yes, for sure, there's been a level of discomfort, but there always is with change, right? Any kind of change, for sure, and then just, you know, like, here's, this is a real too, is getting at the beginning, starting at the beginning, where you're at walking for an hour with almost 20 extra pounds on it, you know, that's hard. And this is, like, a thing that I've appreciated now a little over time, right? Is when I'm walking, and I'm walking in the sunshine, and the sun's behind me, and this is when I first started, like, looking at my Silhouette was hard for me. It was like, oh gosh, man, what have you done when you've done yourself? Right? It's such a common it's such a common thought that when. Think that. Oh, yeah, so, but anyway, my silhouettes getting a little smaller, you know, so now, because it's been a few months, yeah, and I've been kind of and I've stoked with and I've been consistent, yeah, so, yeah, things are fitting. Things are looser. I mean, I have to start thinking pretty soon about maybe getting some new clothes. But, you know, being kind to yourself at the beginning, when it's just hard. Yeah, this is what loving yourself looks like. And I know it ain't pretty. It's not pretty right now, yeah, yeah. Unfortunately, I remember us coaching on that with you and me in the beginning. It with the group, of course, but I remember you just had that I shouldn't be here kind of self talk. And I think unfortunately for a lot of women is they get in that space. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be this way. What have I done to myself? And they literally never get out of it. How have you been able to take away some of that shame? Well, by doing the work first of all, and then collecting the evidence that I can do this. Yeah, yeah. Um, being in the group, the group, you know, encouragement that has been, I'm with a tribe of like minded women that feel the same way and are moving forward. Yeah, tell me what it's like being in the group where sometimes you're not being coached, but you're seeing one of the other women get getting coached. Has that been powerful for you? Oh, totally. I think that's the, you know, the most one of the greatest aspects of the program is being in a group of ladies. Oh, if I don't ever talk in a session, I'm getting something out of it. Absolutely. You know, how other women think, you know, sometimes I'll identify with how they're processing things or their frustration and and I haven't myself been able to articulate it quite like that, so that's saying. You're saying exactly how I feel about that. But so I love that. And then I love your hearing, listening to your coaching. You know how you are helping people. So I think the group dynamic is so good. And I love the fact that we don't know each other, you know, we've got women from all over the United States. I think that's super fun. I know that's going to be a memory. I love that. Yeah, and then this group, you know, we've got, there's a few new ladies in this advanced group, summary, attorneys, and so that's really fun. Everybody brings a little something, yeah, to the group. And then I think, as you stick with it, a pitch for the advanced group too, is that once you're there, you're bringing a little more to the table for the other group members, right? Because, because you've already learned some skills, and we're all at different levels. So I love what I'm learning, what I can learn from the ladies. Thank you for sharing. I remember the first time when I started getting into coaching and hired a coach myself and joined a program. Before I joined the program, I heard that like I wouldn't necessarily be coached every week. Now in, I mean, in our group, in my groups, the groups are pretty small, so most people get coached every week if they want to. But when I joined a group, I remember thinking, why would I want to watch other people get coached? Like that makes no sense, but I ended up joining because I love the woman's podcast. And I was like, let's see. I'm going to just give it a try. And I felt the same way. I'm like, I could just show up and listen to other people being coached, and I get so much from it? Oh, yeah, yeah. I take, I take notes. So I mean, there's times that, you know, I'm taking some gem away from that session, especially since, don't you think Kathy that like, we don't necessarily talk about all this with the other people in our lives. We don't sit down and say, Oh, I, you know, I had a plan to eat. Well, when my neighbor came to visit, and then I didn't, and I'm frustrated. I'm trying to figure out why, and, and there's another woman that says I had the same thing happened. You don't talk like that with your friends. No, no. This is the same. This is the safe place to talk about it, because nobody cares. I mean, you know, we come to this group because we care about this, and we know we need, help. We need some help, and we need to be able to process things. Yeah, that's why I love the group too, is that we're processing I'm a verbal processor, so I need to talk about it, and I need to hear other people too, because that helps me when I'm off the group coaching session, the group dynamics super helpful. Yeah, to know other people are going through the same thing you're going through. It's, yes, brilliant. So how has this like being in the group? I know you've said before that it like it's affecting other areas of your life. Can you share how that's true? Okay? Well, one thing is, in the last couple of years, I had to start taking a statin drug for high cholesterol. Super discouraging. Like, what the heck yeah, I was never going to be that person on cholesterol medication, right? I really wasn't thinking I'm going to go on this program to get off to change that dynamic. But somewhere towards the end of our first session, my doctor called me to remind me I needed a physical, right? So when can you come in? Tomorrow. It was the weirdest, randomest thing ever, right? So I go in and I told her what had been, you know, I had dropped for like, 18 pounds from the last time I was in the doctor's office, which really encouraged me, because Doctor skills, they're just like the devil, right? They are the devil turn around because I don't even want to see the number. I've actually done that before? Yeah, anyway, so she did some lab work, and my cholesterol had dropped so drastically, I was able to cut it in half. And then she is, you know, in January, she wants me to recheck it, and because it had been so high, she said, you're probably never going to go off it, but we can take it down to the lowest dose. And I'm very confident in January that I'm going to be able to do that. But like that just feels so good. That's labs, that's, that's like, that's like, you know, stroke risk there. Oh, yeah. So, you know, when you do get older, you start valuing your health. It's not about your appearance. It's funny. Because, you know, when I was younger, it's totally all about how you look. But I haven't given that up. I want to look nice, but I want to be healthy. Yeah, I want my heart to be fine and my brain to be fine. I don't, yeah, so I can control i That's a bonus of the program, is that it's changing my lab values, that it's changing. You know, that was I was able to share that. I think maybe the our last session, yes, and we all celebrated you. That was so exciting, so exciting. It is really exciting. Those are important things. Our health is important. Yeah. Oh, thank you for sharing. I remember I had one client in another group. Just say, very similar. She came on the call, and she goes, this is going to be, you know, because the group is, there's 40 year olds up to 70 year olds in in my groups. But so the woman came and said, for some of you, this isn't going to make sense, but for some of you, it is. And she goes, I, I, for the other the other day, for the first time, was able to get down on the floor with my grandkid and easily get up. She goes, I could always get up, but it was this big struggle, and I'd have to grab on. And she goes, I and she was almost crying, like, this is a big deal, and everyone, even me, like, I can easily get up and down off the ground right now, but I get it that that's a big deal. That's it's very big. Yeah, so the mobility is a big variable, too. Yeah, for me, I had, I had surgery, and I had my thyroid removed because I had thyroid cancer, right? I'm at my one week post op appointment, and I am walking quickly to my appointment, and I trip, and I have the hardest fall. You cannot believe I break my arm. Oh, was this years ago? This is a long time ago. This is, this is not that long ago. This is a year ago, May, okay. I broke my right arm, dominant arm, and I would already, like, I was already so discouraged, right? Like, what the heck, man. Anyway. So what happened is, you know, it was hard for me to get my clothes on, get my shoes on. Blah, blah, blah. So that kind of set off the mobility thing that was part of the process of, man, I gotta do something, because I'm having a hard time putting my shoes on. Now, excuse me, hard time getting my shoes on. Yeah, no, don't wait till you have a health crisis or a lab value to catapult you into deciding for yourself that something needs to change. You know, don't wait till then. So this is, this is this last summer in May, I had emergency gallbladder surgery. Okay, so you know what the gallbladder does? It emulsifies fat, right? So sometimes that's related to a poor diet. Okay, so that was another thing, yeah? That was like, Okay, no more, yeah, yeah, I'm done. So, you know, my mobility now, since I started from this, you know, it was, it's too bad that I had to have some of those health scares. So let that be a motivation for anyone who's listening. Not Yeah, you know, don't wait till you're there, yeah, until something happens. And that's what may helps you decide, yeah, I agree. I mean, I think, and well, and one of the things I love to think is, like, we've had women join the group who want to lose 50 pounds, and we also have women join the group who want to lose like, seven or eight pounds. And I think it's all valid. I think sometimes what happens is, when we have to lose less pounds, right? We think like, oh, it's just 10 pounds. Oh, it's, it's not that big a deal. I can do this. And then we spend a year, two years, struggling with those 10 pounds. And, yeah, they're not going to come off, because you do a whole 30. Well, that's not true. If you do a whole 30 or a Keto, yeah, you'll lose them, but then you're going to gain them back, because you're not changing you changing you, right? So I just think it's so powerful to go, Yeah, you know, whether you have 50 pounds to lose, or whether you have five pounds, like, I remember struggling even at the end, like, I want to get rid of these five pounds. It's all valid if you don't feel like you and your body, yes. It's, it's, it's an investment in yourself. You said that when I first started listening to you about, you know, if it keeps coming back, yeah, if it's a repetitive thought and it's bothering you, then it is important. Yeah, yeah. So, so give it some attention, yeah. So one of the things we're doing, and I know we just started the advanced group that you're in, Kathy, but like, one of the things you're going to find, and we do, is we it's so much more than weight loss, right? I love that you've lost the 18 pounds, and I love that you're working on all that, and you're getting stronger. But like this work, I know for sure impacts like every area of your life. So have you found that, like, it's changing how you show up to relationships, or it's changing like anything else in your life. We could go on and on about that. How much time do we have? How much time I am but here, here's just like a, you know, I feel like it's cracked the the window of hope for me on relationships. So I've been divorced for like 12 years. Have a handful of dates. I'm, I'm responsible for some of that in that, like, I just, like, it just freaks me out. It's just like, it's there, you know, I'm kind of scared. I'm a little pissed off at this, you know, like with the heck man who wants to date now, right? And I, but I also, like, you know, I think I would really enjoy a companion, so I haven't been willing to even explore that until, you know, like, like, the doors kind of cracking open, of like a little, a little ray of Sunshines coming through the door. Like, you know, maybe that's a possibility, and maybe you should explore that. And so that's a big deal. Yeah, that's a big deal. And that's that has not happened for some time so that it, you know, that's kind of, that's kind of a fun thing that's come out of this. I got a shiver when you said there was a ray of light. I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah. So that for sure. And then I think the confidence piece too. I mean, I I'm recognizing, you know, I think of like, hidden myself. Yeah, when you don't feel like yourself, of course, you hide yourself. Yeah, that's, I don't want to do that. That's how I not how I want to live the rest of my life. No way. Well, I'm excited for you. I know like you are, in a way, even though you've come so far, right? You've lost 18 pounds, you're loving this group, everything in a way, you're just getting started. I see that for you, and I see that for like every like it when you start with your own body and your own feeling in control and feeling like you understand how to manage your own mind, it really does, like you said, open doors to every area of your life. So I'm really excited, and I'm just grateful to have you. So is there anything left you want to, like, share with anyone who's sitting there thinking I might do it, I don't know. Like, is there anything you want to share? I love the work that we're doing. It's really good. It's really like, it's life changing. I'm so good, and you know you're you can change your life when you're become an older person. So that's like the hope piece, you know, when you were prepping me for this podcast, and one of the questions was, you know, what would you want it? What would you want to tell others? Mm, hmm. And that was, you know that you can have hope for your that anything is still possible. Yeah, you know that you can have, you can frame your future with some joy, and you can do some work too. Yeah, pull that off. Yes, I love it. Okay, my friend. So I had some technical difficulties at the very end of the podcast, so it did not record when I thanked Kathy for coming, and she thanked me for for inviting her on the podcast. But you got the best part, the most important part of the podcast, having Kathy on to share her experience being in my small group coaching program. Thank you for listening to the podcast today and have a great Tuesday. If you are ready to lose weight and keep it off permanently and feel confident and at peace around food, I invite you to head to Courtney Gray coaching.com to learn about how to work with me. I work with women privately, one on one, and I also offer small group coaching. There is a link to my website in the show notes you.