How to Stop Waiting and Start Doing

In today’s episode, Courtney dives into a theme that came up repeatedly with her clients this week: wanting to make a change, but not actually doing it.

What You’ll Hear in This Episode:

• Why women often put themselves last—and how our “primitive brain” keeps us stuck in waiting mode.
• The myth of perfect timing: Why “when things slow down” is never the real answer.
• The role of resistance: Why even the things you deeply want will feel hard in the moment.
• How to create a compelling why that excites you enough to overcome obstacles.
• Practical strategies to move from intention to action:
  • Decide exactly when you’ll do the thing.
  • Anticipate the excuses and resistance in advance.
  • Take decisions off your plate ahead of time to make follow-through easier.
• Real-life client stories on wanting to create more art, grow businesses, or get healthier—and the mindset shifts that helped them take action.
• Courtney’s own example of finally updating her business website after two and a half years of delay, and how following her own advice helped her stop waiting.

Key Takeaway

Wanting something isn’t enough. To actually do it, you need a clear why, a plan for resistance, and small daily actions that build momentum. The good news? You don’t have to wait for a milestone or the “perfect time.” You get to decide—today—that this is your next chapter.

Links & Resources

• Sign up for Courtney’s free webinar: Your Next Chapter → https://mailchi.mp/a793710c0ecf/yournextchapter

Interested in speaking with me about how we can work together? Click here to head to my website: https://www.modernbodymodernlife.com/ and schedule a free consultation with me.

Transcript

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Sarah, welcome to modern body, modern life, the podcast for women who want to feel powerful, healthy, strong and confident, inside and out at every age. On this podcast, we talk about becoming a woman who is fully in control of her eating and movement, so weight loss, strength and energy become permanent. We also talk about something bigger, becoming the woman who takes her deepest desire seriously and goes after more in every area of her life. I'm body and life coach Courtney Gray, and I believe you can get in the best shape of your life at any age, and when you do, it becomes a catalyst for everything else, your relationships, your confidence, your joy, because when you feel like you and your body, all of life gets better. Let's get started. Welcome to the podcast episode 94 how to stop wanting and start doing this podcast is inspired by three of my beautiful clients. Actually, I think there are four of this week where they all came to the call really frustrated, like I want to do this thing and I'm just not doing it. And you know that happens so often for me, where I have themes of my clients experiencing the same thing, and when that happens, I'm like, Oh, I know you, my beautiful podcast listener, probably could use the same coaching. So that's why I'm here today. First, just a little bit of what's going on with me. It is a fun time here in my town of Chico. We have a college here in town, Chico State, and a bunch of our friends kids are moving in this weekend. A bunch of our friends kids are coming to Chico State. The fun thing too is, and these are our best friends. Kids are coming. And so we've already had a few of our best friends kid that are coming to Chico State for the last few years, and they live with my boys in their apartment, and it's just been so fun getting to know our best friends kids even better. And now there's even more joining so like, I can't wait to have a big dinner and have them all over here and have a pool party. I'm really, really, really looking forward to it. I feel like I'm really looking out here. I feel like I am given the gift every time I would hear, Oh, Ava is coming. Oh my gosh, so exciting. Carlos coming. Oh my god, Carlos coming too. Yeah, Joshua is coming. It's like I kept going, Yes, I'm so happy for them, of course, because it's such a fun college town and but I'm so happy for me and my husband and my children that we get to be around them and really grow our relationships with them. So so fun, which is, of course, and then also, selfishly, their parents come to town more often, so we get to see our friends so much, so much more. So it's a very, very exciting time. So if you are listening to this podcast in real time, I am hosting another webinar this week. It's a free webinar. It is called your next chapter. This free webinar is for women who know that they're ready for a change. That's what we're doing here at modern body, modern life. I'm really inspiring you to make changes that stick permanent changes. But I love the thought of thinking about a new chapter. Oftentimes, when I talk to women about their weight or about wanting to get stronger or wanting to get healthier, it's sometimes it comes from this place of like, I know I need to do it, or I've tried everything. It's kind of this discouraging, this thing that looms over them. And I like to think of whatever you truly desire for yourself, whether that be getting healthier, getting some new friends, creating some new hobbies, maybe changing jobs, maybe finding a new passion in retirement, whatever it is, I like to think of it as a new chapter. I like thinking, let's make this fun. Let's make this exciting. Let's make this powerful but more important than anything. Let's actually do it so often. When people have tried things in the past, maybe they've like, signed up for the class, signed up for a class to learn something, and the class hasn't been that great, and then they stop, or they say they're going to write a book, and so they watch a webinar writing a book, and then they don't write the book. Or maybe they've tried various diets, lost a little weight, gained it back, and they're kind of tired of all of it. But I love thinking about No, no, no, this is your chance to decide to have a next chapter, and usually in society, I feel like we let society dictate when our next chapter is like, Oh, I'm turning 50 or oh, I'm turning 70. It's a big birthday, right? Like a milestone birthday, or oh, I'm becoming an empty nester, or oh, I'm retiring, or I'm newly divorced. We like, we like, let society decide, oh, this is your time. And I want to tell you, I'm telling you permission, granted. This is your time, whether you're busy, whether you're in the middle of things, whether you're not in your best health, whether you're not feeling great, whether you're taking care of parents, whether you're taking care of your kids, whether you're the soccer mom, or what whatever it is, this can be your next chapter. So this is a free webinar. You can find links in the show notes to sign up for it. You. Can head to modern body, modern life, and sign up for it there, and you can head to my Instagram. In fact, that's another thing I wanted to tell you I'm really excited about talk about, like, how to stop wanting and start doing. I took my own advice that I'm giving you on this podcast. My website for years now, has been Courtney Gray coaching. I bought that years ago, and I was coaching on all the things, coaching on business and relationships and all the things. And then I decided to change my company to modern body, modern life. I just thought, this is I just love the title. It was influenced by this awesome podcast called Modern wisdom. So I kind of took that and judged it up into my own. And so I bought the URL for modern body, modern life. And it's been, like, two and a half years now I've not made that switch. And the main reason I have not made that switch is I do most of my own everything. I do everything. So anytime you're getting an email, it's from me. This podcast gets edited by me, and I know eventually, as my company grows, I'm going to hire consultants, and I'm going to hire a VA and those things will be done by other people. I like learning to do them by myself first, but I knew that eventually I would have to go in on the back end and make that switch. But I also knew that technology is so advanced now that this isn't as hard as it used to be. When I the first time I ever started a website. It was rough. It was hard. Not a lot of people knew what they're doing, but they really do make it pretty easy these days. So I spent about an hour this week, and I made the switch. So now I actually am going to record a new intro to this podcast in an outro. And instead of saying head to Courtney Gray coaching.com I get to now say head to modern body, modern life.com. Which I'm really excited about, because I love the kind of the beautiful simplicity and consistency of the same messaging everywhere, right? If you find me on Facebook or YouTube or my website or this podcast, it's all modern body, modern life. So I'm excited about that. So if you want to sign up for this free webinar called your next chapter. You can head to modern body, modern life.com, and you can sign up there or all the other places. So I had three or four clients this week that are not doing what they want to be doing, right? I think we could all just like I just shared with you, think about something in our life that we actually want to do, but yet, there's a part of us that kind of doesn't, or we kind of assume that if we really wanted to, we would do it right? So many things to dive into here, we are pretty good, as women, at doing for others, but we're not necessarily good at doing things that are only for us, right? I mean, we're good at making a healthy dinner if we know that we're going to eat that dinner and the dinner and the dinner is gonna help our whole family, but like to make something just for us, to do something just for us is a little more challenging. You've heard my analogy that I think most women will say that they put themselves on the back burner, but there are four burners. There's two in the front. You can have your family in the front or your work in the front. You could also have your health in the front as well. There are two. There's not just one front burner and two at the back. So this is especially hard for women. Putting ourselves first is especially hard for women, because we really have been socialized to put others first, even now, at a place in history where, thank God, I just I love historical fiction. I love reading books and and historical books about women all over the world, the different countries, different times. But I just am so grateful to be alive right now. We just have so much more freedom than women in the past have had, right but even now, even though our role in society is so much different than it was in the past. Even though we have so many more liberties and opportunities available to us, there is still a narrative that continues. It like continues on with the generations. Women are taught to be nurturing and caring and accommodating and really putting others first. Research actually shows that girls score higher on people pleasing than boys. Like a slew of research shows that we need to realize that this is kind of built into our nature, to not necessarily do something that we truly just want for us, especially if it doesn't positively affect other people. So how does this show up in your life? How do you want something but yet keep putting it off, or keep not taking it seriously? This could be two different ways. This could be like making a big decision to do something new, right? Like this, this webinar I'm doing, like you deciding to make this a new chapter, right? It could be like you've been wanting to do something big for yourself. Maybe you've been wanting to go back to school, maybe you've been wanting to make more money, maybe you've been wanting to run a marathon. Maybe you've been wanting to lose 40 pounds, like, in a sustainable way. Maybe you've been wanting to really, like, create new friendships. Like, that's something that's really. Been like nagging. I really want to create new friendships in my life. That's a big thing, right? Yes, so we can that can show up this, this waiting and not doing. It can show up in our life in a big way, or it can equally show up in small ways, like simply, like finishing your taxes, cleaning out a closet, starting to food prep, like you keep telling yourself you're going to food prep. Food prep start. Like, for me, I'll tell you something. And this is just a very, very small something, but it's something I've been wanting to do and I've not been doing it is when I go to the gym, I want to then go into the sauna, and this the steam room, and I keep I do want to do it, but I keep not doing it. So this podcast is for you, but it's also for me, because let's think about it, me going into the sauna or steam room. No one cares. No one cares. It doesn't positively affect anyone but me. I'll tell you something right now, if me going into that sauna for 20 minutes after I work out every day, in some way benefited my children, you fucking better believe I'd be saunting for the last few years, right? Can you can you resonate with that? So before I dive in on how to stop and kind of turn this around, it's necessary to understand why we're not doing what we want to do. I always talk about, let's figure out why you are where you are before we go to the future and before we make changes, because here's what I have found with hundreds of clients, if you have been putting something off, procrastinating, if you will, whether it be like me two and a half years making a website change, or if it's something that you just keep for the last six Months telling yourself to do whatever. I want to encourage you to think about what your reason for not doing it is. I find these are a lot of the common reasons people would say it's not possible. Is one of them that they really don't believe they can do what they want to do, especially for those of you that are wanting to lose weight and get healthy, you have a lot of evidence that it that it can't be done. So you think it's not possible. You've spent a long time telling yourself it's not the right time. You you know you're gonna wait until the kids go back to school. You're gonna wait until things slow down at work. You'll do it in January after, you know it's gonna be a better time after the kids leave home. Once I retire, once my husband retires after I have knee surgery. But here is what I have seen time and time again. You will find that even after your chosen time that is the right time, you have a hard time getting going. I have seen this so many times. People will even tell me, I have been wanting to work with you for a year, and I kept telling myself, Oh, I'm going to do it after this, after this right time. And that time came, and they still didn't call me. Excuses kept coming in. They kept finding reasons why it still wasn't a good enough time. Women often find that all of a sudden, when that right time comes, that you've been telling yourself, once this happens, it's going to be the right time to do what I truly desire. Then sometimes you're not sure if you really want it. Do you really want it? You're certainly not sure exactly the best way to go about getting it. It's about making that change. Sometimes, then you find that there are some things you need to button up first. Oh, I said I said I was going to do this when I was retired, but now that I'm retired, I really need to do this. I need to catch up on sleep, or I need to catch up with my friends, or I need to get my house in order first. Or, Oh, I was going to wait until work calmed down, but now that work calmed down, I just feel drained, and I just need more time. So we have all these excuses that come into play. So what's really going on? So there's a few things. First, there is an assumption that if we really wanted to do something, it would flow, that it would not be hard. Now this is a subconscious assumption. It seems like if something, if it's something we want to do, that we should want to do it in the moment, that there would be no resistance. This is simply incorrect. You can want to do something really be passionate and like your reasons why you want to do something, but in the moment, all of a sudden, change your mind, all of a sudden, come up with an excuse not to so what else is really going on? You're listening to the wrong part of your brain. You're believing its excuses. Maybe you haven't done the work to really understand your brain and understand that you have different parts of your brain. You have the part that wants you to set goals, wants you to win, wants you to get a new website and make that website change. That part of you that wants you to go into the sauna and steam room. There's that part of you, but then there's also the other part, the more primitive survival based, part that only wants happiness in the moment. It. And even though you've told yourself that you want to do this thing, whether it's a big thing or whether it's even cleaning out the closet in the guest room, you know, there's a party that wants to in the moment your primitive brain takes over, and it's been taking over for years, so you just go with it. And remember, I want to remind you that your thoughts are powerful. Your thoughts produce your feelings. And any feeling that is produced that is a negative type of feeling, your brain doesn't want you to feel a negative feeling, so it gets you out of it. And oftentimes this looks like you really wanting to do something. You keep reminding yourself that something keeps coming up for you over and over again, that it's something you truly desire, and you have the thought, you know what now is not the right time. Once things slow down, I'm gonna do that. And because of that thought, it produces a feeling. And the feeling, really, I think, is it's probably two feelings. It's incapable, because what you're telling yourself is is like, you can't do that right now. You're not capable of doing that right now. I think it also kind of makes us feel justified. It's like, well, once, because if we're saying to ourselves, once things slow down, what we're really saying is things are really busy. I'm not capable of doing more. And so we have the thought, once things slow down, I'll do it. We feel incapable. We feel justified. Those are slightly negative emotions that are normal, but negative emotions nonetheless. And our body does not want us to feel negative emotions. So instead of questioning that, diving in really thinking, Am I not capable? What is coming up for me? We put off what we truly desire, we believe it. We believe this excuse, and then we create a habit of putting ourself last once again, putting what we truly desire last once again. And you are so used to letting your primitive brain run the show that you don't even know how to start doing what you truly want to do. I talked with two clients this week. Both of them want to be doing more of their artwork. When we talked about, I was talking with them about, like, what do you want the next few months to look like? What do you want to focus on? And it was, I was really excited to hear them say, I really want to do more of my artwork. I like, lit up. I'm like, Ooh, let's talk about it. They want to be creative. They want to and they're like, but I'm not doing it so common. First thing I told them is we assume that, if it's something like art drawing, which we know once we're in it, we know if. And I said, if I could hold the gun to your head and start doing it right and say, start doing it right now, you'd start doing it, and then you'd be in it, you'd be thrilled to be doing it, but it's starting, which sometimes can be really hard to do. I told them. I said, we assume that if we love drawing, and we have these beautiful watercolors, and we people tell us how beautiful our artwork, there's so much positive that comes out of it, we feel like we should want to do it in the moment, and that is just not true. How do you start by doing what you truly desire to do first, I want you to ask yourself, do you really want to do this thing? Now, I think your answer is going to be yes, but I think it's important to say, hey, if I've been telling myself, I want to do it, do I really want to do this thing? I finally said to myself, Courtney, you bought that URL two and a half years ago. Do you really want to make your website modern body, modern life? Is it really that important? Do you love the consist, the business, consistency, that much? And the answer was yes. And why? So then ask yourself, why? Why do you really want this thing? You have to have a compelling why? You have to have a reason that lights you up. And for many women, when I talk to them about getting in their best health, which is a great place to start, in terms of getting up, leveling your life in any area, they'll say, a lot of times, I really need to do this. I have to No, no, no, no. We need to come up with a compelling, exciting, loving, fucking fired up. Why I get that? There's a party that's like, I really need to do. I get that, but get excited. Why? Why would it be so amazing to get in your best health ever? How will it feel? How will it affect every other area of our life? Why do you want to make more money in your business, not just like, Oh, I really need to make more money, and so my husband's not bringing all of the of all the money in, and I really need the No, no, no, let's get excited. Why? Why is it going to be so amazing when you hit$100,000 in your business? Like, let's talk about how exciting it is. And then you can ask yourself, Do I like my reason? Here's what I want, here's why I want it. Do I like my reason for wanting it. It's a great question to ask yourself. Sometimes you will find that you don't like your reason. I think in this case scenario, you will like your reason. But I ask myself this question a lot. Okay, this is what I want to do. I want to go to bed earlier. I want to skip this event, or I. To do this, or I want to do that, do I like my reason? It's a great question to ask yourself to make sure you like your reason for doing what you do, and is your reason compelling enough to get you over the hump of resistance in the moment? Because I want you to know there will be resistance even if you're doing something that seems exciting, seems empowering. I think that's one of the main reasons why a lot of people do not end up going to their own next level and really creating massive change in their life, is because when they think of doing it originally, they think of it working out perfectly. They think of it being so exciting, and then all of a sudden, when they start on the journey towards that change they want to make, they start failing. Of course, that's what it takes. They so they start failing. They start having challenges. Things start coming up. Other parts of their life gets in the way, and it gets hard. And they did not predict that that was going to happen. So your reason of why you want it and do you like that? Why is it compelling enough when there is resistance, when problems arise, that you can push through? And can we determine what that resistance is? So the first thing is, do you really want this thing? Why do you like your reason? Is it compelling enough to get you over the hump of in the moment resistance? And then secondly, what is the resistance going to be? What are the excuses that are going to come up? What are the failures that are going to come up? If you want to lose weight in a sustainable way, you are going to lose weight and then one day you're going to step on the scale and your weight is going to go up, and that's not going to be a fun moment, but if we plan on it, then when it happens, you can go, yeah. Courtney said this was going to happen. When I coach women, I tell them on the first day, hey, you're going to lose weight, but it is good. The scale is going to go up at some point. Can you handle it? Can you make it mean nothing negative about you? Can you make it mean this is part of the process? Can you make it mean that on your way to winning in terms of health, that you're going to lose and learn from that losing. So what excuses are going to come up, what circumstances are going to come up on your way to doing this? And then third, choose a time that you want to do this thing and make a plan when exactly do you want to start doing this thing? How can you plan for it? The reason why it's so important to make a specific decision on when you're going to do it is because then you can say to yourself, Okay, here's what I'm going to do at this moment. I'm going to do this thing. And then you can say, and I know there will be excuses in that moment. And so then when the excuses are there, you're not caught off guard. You totally understand, Oh, that's my primitive brain. This is supposed to be there. This is supposed to be there for so many reasons. Courtney told me that I'm, you know, I haven't been doing a good job of doing what I want. That's just for me. My primitive brain is getting in the way and telling me this isn't fun. I should go eat chips instead, or I should just start tomorrow. But you need to be able to say, this is the time that I'm going to start for that primitive brain to get in the way in that moment, for you to be able to diagnose it in the moment, to be able to recognize it and say, Oh, this is what's going on. I can handle this. I also suggest taking away decisions, taking away any other decisions in the moment that might come up. Many of my clients want to work out in the mornings. Many of my clients want to food prep for their day in the mornings. Many of my clients would like to journal. They would like just more time to not be running, running, running in the mornings. And so you have to take away decisions, and we can do that by getting our clothes ready, you know, before we get up in the morning, have that decision already done, knowing what you're going to eat that day. So we have that decision out of the way, we can put your phone across the room, so that takes away the decision of hitting snooze. We want to really plan to help ourselves win. What does this look like when it comes to your day to day routines? So let's say you do want to wake up 30 minutes earlier and you want to do 10 minutes of yoga in the morning. Let's say you've been telling yourself that for a while. Let's say your sister has been saying she wakes up in the morning and she does 10 minutes of yoga, and it's just totally transforming her mornings. She feels like she has more energy. And you've been telling yourself for a while, yeah, I want to do that too. Beautiful. Why do you want to do that? I really want you to dive into all the reasons why that is an amazing choice for you. And then I want you to say, Do I like this reason? Do I like my reason for wanting to do this? You'll probably say yes, but it's really good to make sure what time exactly do you want to wake up? Not just I want to wake up earlier, like, let's figure out if you're going to do 10. Of yoga. What time do you need to wake up to get that done? And then what is your brain going to say when your alarm goes off? It's going to tell you something. Everyone's brain is a little different. Maybe it's going to say, I didn't get enough sleep, or I'm really tired. That is a common one from our primitive brain, that it tells us that we didn't get enough sleep and that we're really tired. I said this to a client this week. I said, I just want you to know most people, I would imagine 99% of people, when the alarm goes off, they are tired. So what? Very rarely, I think, let me know. Email me and let me know if I'm wrong about this, if you wake up and you literally, like your eyes open and you're like, ah, that felt so great. I'm feeling so restored. I just don't think that's real. I know even when I've slept really well, I still wake up in the morning a little tired. So when your brain is going to tell you you need more sleep, you're tired, can you get good at going at that's my permanent brain, and get up anyways. And can you plan? Can you take decisions away? Can you get your yoga mat out and just lay it out? Can you already choose the YouTube video ahead of time that you're going to watch? Can you choose, are you going to do coffee before? Are you going to do coffee after? Take all those decisions away, make all those decisions, so all those decisions are taken away, and you have less resistance. Because here's what happens. And it sounds so in consequential I don't know if that's the right word, but it sounds so like no big deal. But I promise you it is. When you say, I'm gonna work out tomorrow morning, and you have not built the habit of working out in the mornings, you wake up. First of all, you're like, I'm tired. This is horrible. Why am I doing this? I can do this later. I didn't get enough sleep. Your brain is going to go crazy on you. That's you're gonna have to deal with that. Then if you actually manage to stand up and get out of bed, then you're like, Okay, now I need to decide what to wear if you have not been working out lately, what fits what looks good together? What do you feel comfortable in? Should you just wear your underwear if you're at home doing yoga? Is that going to be weird if your partner walks in on you? Are you going to the gym? Is it going to be hot in the gym? Is it there's too many decisions to make. I'll tell you. Another thing that happens for me is I don't want to wake up my husband in the morning, so I will get my clothes out in the morning, because I don't want to open the drawer. My brain will say, Oh, you forgot to lay out your clothes. You don't want to wake Greg up. You should just go. You should just work out later, ridiculous, so I will get my clothes out at night before I go to bed. And then you all of a sudden, go to the bathroom, and then you're there in the bathroom, and it's like, the decision of like, Well, should I put some makeup on if I'm going to the gym, or should I just go to the gym with a bare face? And then you go out and you're like, should I have tea? Should I have coffee? Oh my gosh, should I turn on the coffee maker? It's kind of loud. I don't want to wake anybody up. And how much coffee should I make? Is my husband gonna be here? Or is he gonna Oh my god, it sounds so silly, but this is what happens. All of these primitive brain thoughts are to try to get us to just say, You know what, you know what. It's not a good day for this. Okay, so you need to plan all of this ahead of time, and you will find when you start planning and start doing this, it all becomes so much easier. It sounds a lot right now, as I'm delivering it to you, but all of this, a lot, is what's keeping you stuck. When you start planning this out. It all starts working like clockwork, and it gets so much easier, I promise you. So let's go bigger. In terms of an example of how to do this, let's say you want to grow your business. I talked to many clients this week who they want to make more money. They want to grow their business. And very commonly, I hear from a lot of my clients that want to grow their businesses is that they want to show up more boldly, whether it's on social media, whether it's telling people what they do, whether it's marketing more powerfully, whether it's starting a podcast, or whatever it is, they know that they're capable of more. And so I say to them, Do you really want to be more bold, like, do you really want to do that? Because there's a part of them that does, but there's a part of them that doesn't, and there's fear there, right? So we really go into why do you really want to become the woman that can be more bold and sell harder and market harder to make more money? Do you really want it? And why? And let's come up with a beautiful, compelling reason why they really want this. Do they like their reason? Again? Usually in these moments, they'll say they do like their reason. What resistance is going to come up? And I will tell you right now, for this circumstance of wanting to be bolder and shout from the rooftops, what you're doing in your business. The resistance that's going to come up is people are going to have thoughts about me, and it sounds almost embarrassing for many people to admit. No one wants to admit that they're staying small because they're worried what other people would think of them. But why did I tell my clients is this is a very primal survival instinct we want people to. Be pleased with us, not only because as women, it's our, you know, social programming, but even as a human being, men and women, we were designed to live and help each other survive in communities, and we want to make sure people like us. So when we think about shouting our business from the rooftops, becoming an expert, saying, I can help you with this. We think, Oh, my God, people are going to be like, Who is she to be saying that? And why does she think she's the expert on that? So that's the resistance that's going to come up. And what will you do? When will you do it? Knowing that resistance that is going to come up is a very important step. It's not going away. Many, many business owners, if you're a business owner, if you're an entrepreneur, many entrepreneurs are sitting around waiting to feel more confident. They're waiting for that resistance to go away. And I promise you, it's not going away, because at every level, there'll be new resistance. You need to plan. Then what will you do? What exactly are you going to do to be more bold and more powerful? What are you going to do? When will you do it? Specifically? What are you going to say? How will you do it? And can you take some of the decisions away ahead of time? So if you say to yourself tomorrow, I am going to make a reel, to post to to Instagram. Can you say, Okay, this is what I'm going to talk about tomorrow in the real this is what I'm going to wear. This is where I'm going to do it. I'm going to wash my hair tonight, because I like my hair better the day after. You're going to make all these decisions and take away some decisions in the moment, so you just make it easier on yourself. You know how it is when all of a sudden it's like, oh my gosh, okay. I said I was going to do this reel, and my hair is not looking as good as it normally could have if I would have showered last night. And I don't really like the lighting right now, maybe I should do this later. And you know what? I don't even know what to say to these people. Too many decisions in the moment. So how can you plan and take decisions away. Let's do another example that is a bigger example of how this process works that is going to get you from I want to do this thing to actually doing this thing. If you want to get in your best health, ever stronger, losing weight, eating better, drinking less, whatever it is for you, let's say you want to lose 40 pounds. Do you really want to lose 40 pounds again, like I said before, yes, you might say I really need to. But do you want to? Is this something you truly want? Why do you want it? I would take time to listen to this podcast and actually journal on why you want something. Can you write down 10 reasons why this thing that you want would be amazing if you made it happen? That's important. You have to have a really compelling why. And you have to love your Why do you like your reasons. So if you said, You know what, I really need to lose 40 pounds. The doctor says I have to, or else I'm gonna have to go on statin. I'm just throwing that out there. That's not a reason you're necessarily gonna like, you're gonna be like, it falls flat. But if you sit, sit there and say, I'll tell you why I want to lose 40 pounds. I want to feel powerful, this is all I'm getting emotional. Isn't even talking about this, because this is all the reasons why hundreds of women have told me that this is why they want to lose weight. I'm just coming off the cuff with this. They want to feel powerful. They want to feel good in their body. They want to feel sexy. They want to feel confident enough to put themselves out there in terms of meeting someone new, or showing up on social media for their business, or just going to events and feeling good in their own skin. They want to feel like they are strong enough to be a major player in their grandkids life. That's a big one. They want to feel like they can go on vacation and actually be like a huge part of the vacation and not be like my knees hurt and my back hurts and I'm a mess. They want to lose this weight because they want to live longer. They want to lose this weight because they want to do better than their parents did. They want to lose this weight because they want to make their kids proud. So can you hear why all those reasons are so much more powerful than the doctor says? I need to. I've tried, I haven't been able to, but I really, I really need to commit. Can you hear the difference? And then do you like your reason? All those reasons I said, you might be like, hell yeah, those are great reasons. What resistance is going to come up for you? The biggest resistance I hear is it's not the right time. And I've tried everything. First of all, you have not tried everything. It's just not possible. It's a thing. Our primitive brain says it's just not possible. Those excuses are keeping you stuck, but we know that they're coming. So you can say, You know what, I'm ready. Maybe you decide to sign up for my workshop, and you're like, yes, in this next chapter, I am losing 40 pounds, 30 pounds, whatever it is, what resistance is going to come? Up, you're gonna go, You know what? I you know the holidays are really busy. I'm just gonna wait. But if you know it's coming up, then you can talk to yourself. You can talk yourself through it. You can coach yourself through it. What are all the resistances that are going to come up, and what exactly are you going to do specifically when it comes to weight loss, I would look at what your biggest challenges are. What are your biggest challenges? Is it nighttime, eating? Is it portions? Is it, you know, you travel a lot? Is it what is it? What do you think? And then, What decisions do you want to make that's going to make this easier for you? When will you do it? And how can you plan and take some decisions away? How can you support yourself? This is what is going to get you from I need to lose weight. I need to wake up earlier. I need to grow my business. I need to, you know, Link modern body, modern life, to my old podcast. I need to start doing the sauna, to actually doing it, to actually powerfully taking control of your life. And it's not always going to be easy, but I promise you, it will get easier. Because what's going to happen it's not well, let me say it this way. It's not that it's going to get easier. You're going to get stronger and more powerful, and that will make it easier. You changing you will make it easier. That's all I got for you today. I hope you have a lovely Tuesday, my friend, the work I do with my clients is so much deeper than weight loss. When you learn how to feel in control of your mindset, your eating and how you move your body, you will up level. You You will become different. This is what makes change permanent. To learn how to work with me. Head to modern body, modern life.com. I work with women privately, and I also offer small group coaching. There is a link to my website in the show notes. So.