The Feed My Health Podcast

The Hidden Reason You Can't Stick to Your Health Goals

• Rosalind Tapper

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The Beliefs Keeping You Stuck

Most women think they’re failing because they can’t resist chocolate, don’t have enough motivation, or keep falling off the wagon. But the truth is - none of that’s the real problem.

The thing truly keeping you stuck are the beliefs you hold about yourself.

Beliefs like:
 👉 “I can’t stick to anything.”
 👉 “I’m too old to change now.”
 👉 “I’ve tried everything, nothing works for me.”
 👉 “It’s selfish to put myself first.”

In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on how those hidden beliefs shape every decision you make - and why they’re quietly running your life. I’ll share my own story of breaking free from the weekend binge cycle, plus how my clients have rewritten their beliefs and completely transformed their confidence, their health, and their futures.

If you’ve ever thought “I know what to do, I just can’t seem to do it,” this episode will show you why - and give you the first steps to finally break free.

Because your beliefs aren’t facts. They’re just old stories. And it’s time to write a new one.


👉 We don’t just help you lose weight - we help you keep it off for good. If you’re serious about breaking free from quick fixes, my team and I will transform your daily habits so your results last a lifetime.

JOIN Feed My Health Today!

✨ Not ready to dive all the way in yet? That’s okay.
If you know something has to change but you’re not quite ready for the full programme, I’ve created two simple ways to step into my world and start building momentum:

🌸 The Confidence Kickstart (FREE Telegram Group)
This is your safe space to get inspired, learn bite-sized mindset strategies, and start feeling more in control of your health and body again. It’s where you’ll get practical tools, motivation, and a taste of what’s possible for you when you stop putting yourself last.

🔥 The Body Confidence Club (£22 right now)
If you’re ready to do more than just watch from the sidelines and want to start implementing real changes, this is your next step. Inside you’ll get structured guidance, simple actions to follow, and the accountability to finally follow through. (The price will be increasing soon, so now is the best time to jump in!)

Speaker 1:

How much of your life have you spent thinking the problem was food or workouts or motivation? Because here's the truth that most women and men don't realize, and the reason why I say men is that I think, as women, we don't realize how much these things also impact the men in our lives, how much these things also impact the men in our lives. So, when you listen to these podcasts, yes, some are going to pertain to males, sorry, to females, but a lot also pertains to men, and I think sometimes we don't give men enough credit for what they also go through. And I want you to always remember that there is somebody in your life going through something that you are, whether they're male or female. So share this with somebody, because it will probably really help. Here's the thing that most women don't realize it's not those things keeping you stuck, so it's not your food, it's not your workouts and it's not motivation, it's not your love of chocolate or the fact that you've got no willpower, it's not because you can't be trusted around wine or crisps. It's the beliefs that you hold about yourself, and the thing about beliefs is whether they're true or not. They will shape your entire reality. So today I want to pull back the curtain and help you see that the beliefs that have been quietly running the show and keeping you stuck and then show you how to start building new ones so you can finally get the results and the confidence that you deserve.

Speaker 1:

So let's start here. Your beliefs create your thoughts and your thoughts create your feelings. Your feelings drive your actions and your actions create your results. I'm going to say that one more time because I really want this to resonate. I really want you to grasp this and please, please, please, write it down and remember this, because somewhere along the way you might struggle with something and I want you to kind of find the piece that is driving the thought, the feeling, whatever. So your beliefs create your thoughts. So if you're having a thought about something, it's because of a belief that you hold, whether a belief that you are aware of or a belief that you're not aware of. Your thoughts then create your feelings. So, if you're feeling a particular way, it's because your thoughts are creating that feeling and the thought is created from the belief. And your feelings then drive your actions and your actions create the result. So, if you think about it logically, if you are feeling a certain way negatively. It could drive a negative action, and then that negative action can create a negative result, and it works both ways. So we need to learn to use this to your advantage. Then those results, they loop right back around and reinforce your beliefs.

Speaker 1:

So I'm going to give you an example. Let's say that you believe I can never stick to anything. Let's say that you believe I can never stick to anything. That belief leads to thoughts like what's the point? I'll just mess it up again. And that thought then creates feelings like shame, guilt and maybe even hopelessness. And from that emotional state, what kind of actions do you then take? You might skip your workout, you might order the takeaway, you might say sod it, I'll start again on Monday. And when that happens, the result is you don't stick to it and the cycle continues. And so you've just proved yourself right, and not because it's true, but because you've been living out of the story that you believe.

Speaker 1:

And this is why so many women feel trapped. It's not because they're lazy, it's not because they're weak, it's because they're carrying beliefs that are sabotaging them at every single step. So let's get really, really honest for a second. These are the beliefs I hear over and over again from women in midlife and they're probably going to sound familiar to you too. So number one is I'm too old now, or typically this comes up as it's harder now I'm older. And this one really breaks my heart, because women tell me this at 40, they tell me this at 50, they tell me this at 60. The belief is it's too late for me or my best years have gone, and the repercussion is that you then give up before you even start. You play small, you accept feeling rubbish as your new normal. But let me tell you I have worked with women in their 40s, 50s and 60s who are in the best shape of their lives right now. And age is not the problem. The belief is the problem.

Speaker 1:

The second one I've tried everything and nothing works for me. I very, very, very closely got down this trap and I hear it all the time and this one usually comes after years of Slimming World Weight Watchers. Years of Slimming World Weight Watchers. Shakes, the lettuce leaf diets, you know the special K diet, and I will hear this again with injections. Right, this is going to come full circle. With injections, you've been let down so many times that the belief you formed is I'm unfixable. Here's the truth. It's not that you failed, it's the methods you have been using. Those approaches were never designed to be sustainable and of course they didn't work. But when you carry this belief, you approach every new attempt with half-hearted energy, waiting to fail. You are constantly waiting to screw up and that's the problem. It's the belief.

Speaker 1:

Number three I can't stick to anything. Again, this was classic me, classic me, and this is such a big one. If you've been on and off diets for the majority of your life, of course you'll believe you're flaky. Of course you'll believe you're weak. But again, it's not the truth. It's the story that you have rehearsed over and over again, and the more you say it, the more you think it, the more evidence you create to back it up. Number four I'm selfish if I put myself first. How many of you listening right now feel guilty if you take an hour to go and go for a walk or go to the gym or go do a workout, right, or if you cook something that's good for you? Instead of bending over backwards for everybody else's preferences? I see women would rather cook two different meals to please everybody than actually say do you know what? Guys? We're having this tonight, because this is what I want. This belief is one of the biggest reasons women stay stuck, because when you always put yourself last, you teach yourself and the people around you your partner, your husband, your children that you don't matter and they'll treat you the same way. By the way, they will treat you how you treat yourself.

Speaker 1:

Number five is it has to be perfect or it's not worth it. Perfectionism is the sneakiest belief of all. If you think that it only counts if it's 100% clean eating, for example, or seven days of working out, or absolute discipline, or always hitting your 10,000 steps, you will never win, because perfection is impossible. It is an impossible standard, and when you can't hit it, you'll quit Simple. So do any of these sound like you? Because if they do, I want you to know this. These beliefs are not facts. They are just old stories that you've told yourself so many times, and when you tell yourself a story so many times, they will become real. It's like the chronic lie that I've spoken to you about many times before. If you rehearse a lie over and over again as many times as possible, you yourself will start to believe that lie, and that is exactly what's happening here. I want to give you an example from my own life.

Speaker 1:

So for years I believed that I had no self-control at the weekends. I would be good all week, all week. So Sunday nights I would sit down, I would go through my magazines and I would look at celebrity diets, what so-and-so ate to lose half a stone, all of this stuff, and I would map out the game plan and that really excited me because I felt like I was in control. So on a Monday I would go to the shop, I'd buy all the things and I would be really, really quote unquote good the things and I would be really, really quote-unquote good. And it was so exciting because I was like, yes, fresh start, new week, let's go buzzing. All the rest of it. And the excitement and the motivation drove the fact that actually the foods I was it, the foods I was eating was really uninspired, really dull, really boring.

Speaker 1:

But then Friday night would roll around and I'd had a really stressful week keeping up appearances, trying to be the best mother in the world, trying to be the best wife in the world. I was not a wife at the time, but you know the housewife vibes trying to run a business in the evening trying to carry so much on my own shoulders that I was exhausted emotionally and physically. And so we get to Friday and we'd be like, right, I don't want to cook anymore, I've cooked all week, I've done all this. So we'd order a takeaway and it would come in this. I just visually remember it now, like it would come in a massive cardboard box as if we were feeding a family of maybe 10. It was literally for me and Mark at the time.

Speaker 1:

I don't really remember if I was into alcohol. I can't really remember. It might have been my rosé years. I started drinking rosé quite quite a bit. It could have been I can't remember, but regardless I ate a lot of food and in my head the belief was was already there and it was always see, friday can't stick to it. Giving up, you screw it up again, like it became, like I expected it. Basically I expected it. So then what would happen was obviously I messed up Friday. So then the week sorry, the weekend would follow suit and we'd start new little traditions. So I'd always like to make pancakes for the kids on a Saturday. I absolutely love pancakes, so of course I'm going to have them, and it all just kind of snowballed from there. The weekends just were just a food fest. And then I'd wake up Monday and guess where we were again Back to hating myself, back to feeling like I had no self-esteem, back to the next kind of celebrity diet that I'd read in a magazine, back to the next kind of celebrity diet that I'd read in a magazine, and the belief that I held was that I couldn't trust myself and that kept me stuck for years.

Speaker 1:

And it wasn't until I started to reframe it to tell myself actually, you can be a consistent woman, I am a consistent woman, I can enjoy food and still hit my goals that things really started to shift. And I remember thinking to myself after one kind of night of overeating. I remember thinking what would happen if I didn't do what I normally do, which would be wake up in the morning, make the pancakes, all of the rest, what would happen if I actually just ate something that was really good, that aligned with the goal that I wanted? And the thing is now I eat out, you know, a couple of times a week. Sometimes I enjoy the foods that I love, and I still get results.

Speaker 1:

And I see this exactly the same with my clients. They are in utter disbelief, actually, that it's even possible, because they have been so conditioned to believe that it is all or nothing. So I've had clients that will say things that they can't stick to anything. They've been on and off the cycle of dieting for years and years and years and, honestly, what we do at Feed my Health is so much more than helping people with their nutrition and training Like that is really 25% of the work. The work really happens in the mindset the building up of the self-esteem, the shifting of beliefs, and once you start to stack the evidence that you can do these things, everything will change for you as well. And our clients lose weight, they eat more food than they've ever eaten and they actually can't believe how effortless it feels. And that's an amazing thing, because you start to trust yourself again and that is everything.

Speaker 1:

So how do we break free from these beliefs that we hold? So it's a bit of a four-step process and it has to be something that you really want to do. It's not enough to listen to this and kind of take any information and go, oh okay, then cool, yeah, got it. Yeah, fine, because I can guarantee you'll feel good for a little bit while you listen to this and then you'll get on with your day and those beliefs will be running the show because they're so ingrained. So it does take time, it does take a little bit of work and if you're wanting to get rid of these beliefs, it's well worth it, in my opinion.

Speaker 1:

So number one is catch the belief. When you hear yourself say I can't stick to anything, I'm too old, I'm too fat, I'm this, I'm that, I look awful in these clothes, stop and notice it, just notice it. Be aware. Awareness is everything with everything in life, but specifically this, then I want you to question it. So that's step number two. Question it Ask is this actually true or is this just a story I've been telling myself? Now, hopefully you haven't got little ears near you while you're listening to this, but a classic example of a belief that simplifies this concept is the belief of the tooth fairy.

Speaker 1:

If you have young children, or you've had young children or you were a young child at one stage, you will know about the, the belief of the tooth fairy, and you tell yourself the belief of the tooth fairy over and over again for many, many years, to the point where you actually start to believe it, and it becomes very believable because of the way in which you present the story to the people that need to hear it. Right, it is exactly the same, but nobody ever just sort of sits there. No child ever goes. Hang on a minute, though. Is this actually a fact, or is this just a story that I've been told? And I want you to treat your internal dialogue and your beliefs just very much like the story of the tooth fairy. Is this actually true or is this just a story I've been telling myself?

Speaker 1:

Number three is to replace it, so create an identity-based statement. Instead of I'm inconsistent, I want you to say I'm a consistent woman who follows through, or I'm a consistent woman who does what she says she's going to do, who keeps the promises to herself, even when life gets tough. It really, really helps to write these statements down. Really helps to write as I'm recording this podcast. Actually, I have about have about. You can hear. I have about 10 post-it notes on my desk that reframe beliefs, or they're just like lines that I need to hear, so I'm going to read you one, actually, because I'm very transparent. The first one that I pull up says I'm learning and growing. My work changes lives and you get what you are. So I just write these little things down and when I need to, I just pull them up and I read them and it reinforces to me the identity and the beliefs that I want to actually hold and actually are true, because my work does change people's lives. This podcast can change your life if you allow it to.

Speaker 1:

Number four is then to build evidence. This is critical. If you miss this step, don't even worry about one, two or three Stack small daily wins to prove the new belief is right. Each time you keep a promise to yourself, you will then strengthen it. Please be aware as well of the small wins that you actually do. You need proof, you need reinforcement of the thing, and this is how you shift from the woman who keeps starting over to the woman who never has to start again.

Speaker 1:

And let me tell you that shift is worth more than any quick fix, because it changes who you are, at your core. So let me leave you with this your beliefs are not facts. They're just patterns that you have repeated, and the second you choose to rewrite them, everything changes. You don't need more willpower. You don't need another diet. You need to believe you are worthy of change and start acting like it. And if this episode hit home for you and you are ready to start building beliefs that actually serve you, then please drop me a message on Instagram with the word health. I will share exactly how we do this together inside Feed my Health, so that you never, ever, ever, have to start over again Because you are not broken, you're not too old, you're not all of the things that you're telling yourself that you are. You are just stuck in old stories, which are beliefs, and it is time to write a new one.