Ep #78 - Summer mini-series - Stop the Scroll

Let’s get one thing straight: it’s not that you “don’t have time.” It’s that you're stuck in a cycle of over-scrolling, over-avoiding, and under-feeling. In this punchy, loving-but-direct episode, I’m calling it out and showing you exactly what’s really going on when you say you “don’t have time” for the stuff that actually matters to you.

Because here’s the truth: your phone is not the boss of you. And scrolling isn’t a time filler—it’s an escape from feelings you’re avoiding. But you know what’s more uncomfortable than feeling your feelings? Staying stuck in a life that feels like it’s slipping through your fingers.

This summer, I want you to stop passively listening and start actively practicing. This mini episode is your gentle kick up the arse—full of empathy and zero bullshit. Learn how to stop numbing out, start making conscious choices, and get back in the driver’s seat of your own life.

Because you, my lovely, are the one in charge. Let’s act like it.

You can also watch this episode on YouTube with Captions - https://www.youtube.com/@TheWorkingMumsLifeCoach

If you'd like to have a chat about how I can help you further, please don't hesitate to click here & book a time with me, I'd love to meet you.

You can also follow me on IG @NickyBevan_LifeCoach

Transcript

I was going to have a break. From podcasting over the summer season. And then, I had this idea about creating a whole little mini-series, a summer mini-series.

And I have been so inspired by this thought that I've… just pre-recorded 8 very short, absolutely no bullshit, incredibly loving mini… podcast episodes.

I don't want you just to listen to them, I want you to listen to them, and then practice it!

I really want to invite you to take this summer to listen to this bite-sized short episode and apply what I'm teaching in it.

And then just get fascinated at what shift that creates in your life over this 8 weeks.

I hope you enjoyed this episode and I will see you when I'm back in September!

It fascinates me how so many people come on and go, oh, I just don't have time. I just don't have time to, you know, do the exercise I want. I just don't have the time to think about.

Eating healthy, I just don't have the time to spend with my children, or I just don't have the time for… everything's too much.

And then they sit there, scrolling on their phone for hours, scrolling on TikTok, scrolling on Instagram, scrolling on Facebook, scrolling on LinkedIn, watching shit on TV that they're actually not interested in.

And then they beat themselves up. For doing that.

This is not a time management issue. This is an over-scrolling issue. It's an under-feeling issue, as in, you're not willing to feel bored, or you're not willing to feel some form of discomfort.

As in, let's avoid that report and we'll scroll on LinkedIn instead, or I really don't want to make that phone call, so I'll just check my emails again.

That is not a judgement. I'm not criticising you, I'm here to tell you that you're human.

By design, our phones are the most addictive thing, along with sugar, alcohol, processed foods, porn, gambling. By design.

That's what they've created. That does not mean to say you have to buy into that.

When you learn to be kind to yourself. It could sound like, right, I'm just gonna sit here for… I'm gonna put a timer on for 15 minutes, and I'm gonna sit here for 15 minutes, and I'm really gonna enjoy looking at Instagram. 

I love my Instagram feed. I used to spend a lot of time on TikTok. I used to love TikTok. Not so much recently, but… I love TikTok. If that's what you want to do, very deliberately allocate time. Sit down and enjoy it, and when that timer goes off? Pull yourself away. It will be uncomfortable to pull away from that. I'm not saying it's going to be comfortable. It won't be. It'll feel really fucking uncomfortable.

But learning how to pull away from that and going, actually, do you know what?

Remember, now, Nicky’s in charge, you are learning how to be in charge of your life.

So, Nicky's gonna come up, get up. And she's gonna go and pick up that book she really wants to read, or I'm gonna go and do that little… those… 10 squats or, you know, a 20-minute Tabateau, or I'm gonna go and talk to my husband, or talk to… like, really focus on my husband for 20 minutes or half an hour, whatever it is that you actually really want to do. It will not happen automatically.

It will not happen automatically. You have to very consciously and very deliberately plan what you want to do.

Be willing to be uncomfortable temporarily in pulling yourself away from that addictive act… activity.

And then very deliberately choose how you want to spend your time.

It's consciousness. It's very deliberate decision-making.

And the problem is with scrolling. Overeating, over-drinking.

It feels really good in the moment. Like, that losing yourself, the numbness, the joy of the chocolate melting in your mouth. Yes, feels incredible in the moment.

But then a few minutes later, huh? Or an hour later, or two hours later, when you've sat and you've wa- you're then judging yourself and beating yourself up for wasting that time, or the next day you have a hangover, or now you're putting on weight, and you've got brain fog, and you're sluggish.

That is not enjoyable. So that temporary comfort that you're seeking is creating so much more discomfort long-term in your life.

We want to swap it around. We want to be willing to learn how to be temporarily uncomfortable in order to create so much more comfort longer term.

It will not happen automatically. Just listening to this episode will not do it.

I really wish it did, but it won't. You have to go away and practice in your life. Start small.

Start with one thing, but practice that until you get good.

Have an amazing week. Sending you lots of love and encouragement, and I'll speak to you next week. Bye!