Ep #80 - Summer mini-series - Who Do You Want to Be? Your “I AM” Identity

Welcome back to the Summer Mini-Series! In this short but powerful episode, we’re diving deep into one of the most transformational coaching tools I use with my clients – your “I AM” statements.

This episode is an invitation. Not just to listen, but to practice. To gently challenge those default, often negative, stories you've absorbed about yourself – “I’m anxious”, “I’m an overthinker”, “I’m just not good at planning” – and to begin rewriting them.

Because here’s the truth: you get to choose who you are. Not the version of you shaped by childhood, past mistakes, or someone else’s opinion – but the version of you that you want to be.

You’ll hear about my own “I AMs”, how to find yours, and a simple practice that will help you feel grounded, empowered, and deeply connected to your truth. This isn’t fluffy affirmation nonsense – this is about building emotional muscle, one minute at a time.

If you’ve ever felt like a balloon being blown about by other people’s opinions or expectations, this one’s for you. It’s time to come home to yourself.

Enjoy the episode and remember – this work works when you do it. 

You can also watch this episode on YouTube with Captions - https://www.youtube.com/@TheWorkingMumsLifeCoach

If you'd like to have a chat about how I can help you further, please don't hesitate to click here & book a time with me, I'd love to meet you.

You can also follow me on IG @NickyBevan_LifeCoach

Transcript

I was going to have a break. From podcasting over the summer season. And then, I had this idea about creating a whole little mini-series, a summer mini-series. 

And I have been so inspired by this thought that I've… just pre-recorded 8 very short, absolutely no bullshit, incredibly loving mini… podcast episodes. 

I don't want you just to listen to them, I want you to listen to them, and then practice it! 

I really want to invite you to take this summer to listen to this bite-sized short episode and apply what I'm teaching in it. 

And then just get fascinated at what shift that creates in your life over this 8 weeks. 

I hope you enjoyed this episode and I will see you when I'm back in September! 

When I ask, who are you? And you answer with, well, I am… Whatever you put in.

That is what you'll create in your life. Your thoughts create your reality. Your thoughts become your personality, your personal reality.

And Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about this a lot, right? Your thoughts become things.

It's also manifestation, positively and negatively, but really, your I am statement.

And a lot of people then go to I am a mum, I am a job title, I am, you know, a wife.

I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about who you are.

At your core center. And if you've never considered that before, which most people actually haven't.

You actually get to choose who you want to be. And I bet no one has told you that. I bet no one has said, hey, gorgeous girl, did you know that regardless of what all the stuff that you've heard growing up, at this point now that you're a fully functioning adult.

You get to choose who you are. Because so many people come to me and go, oh yeah, I am an over-thinker, I am high maintenance, I am shy, I am anxious, I am… not a good planner. I am, I am, I am, and it's all negative, and that's what they end up creating in their life, and they're creating that type of personality

Very unconsciously, and then they go, oh, but that's just who I am.

That, my friend, is bullshit. That is not just who you are.

It might have been just what you've heard throughout your life.

But from this point on now, that you've, especially now you've heard this, you get to draw a line in the sand.

You get to very lovingly and very kindly decide Who do I want to be?

So I have four core values. They're my I AM statements that I choose to be. So, above all, I am loving.

I am honest, not everybody appreciates that, value. But I would rather say nothing than lie to somebody, or to myself, even.

I am bold, as in courageous. Like, I'm really courageous, but there's something about the word bold that just goes, ooh, in my body.

And I'm curious… I'm really curious.

So when I know these four things about me, when I choose who this… who I am at my heart center.

That makes me feel grounded. I feel like a solid rock, rather than a balloon being flown around all in the wind by life circumstances, trying to external validation from Johnny, my husband, trying to get that love for my children so desperately and needy… needily.

You know, that balloon, just looking for everything outside of you.

But that safety and comfort and security is already available inside of you. You just have to… Tell yourself.

And give yourself permission, even if it's just for a minute.

To fill yourself up with how good it feels when you think about your I AM statements.

So I've shared mine. You get to pick yours, and you will actually know deeply what you want your I am statements to be. It's just, if your brain's going, oh, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, that's just protection. Yes, you do. You know everything about you. And this is something you get to decide. And if it's really challenging, look at someone you admire.

And what is it about that person that you admire? Because what you see in other people, positively and negatively.

Is already in you. So if you have… if there's something like Taylor Swift.

Or, like, your mum's… your mum's friend, or I don't know, someone at work.

What is it about them that you… You admire, because that will be in you, because if it's not in you, you won't be able to see it in them.

You just won't be able to see it, because you don't recognise it.

So pick your I AM statements. And then tell yourself then frequently, and I would challenge yourself this week.

To put a timer on, start with a minute, get comfortable with a minute, and then increase the time.

And tell yourself your I AM statements. And this bit is really important.

Allow yourself to believe them. And when you believe them, let your body fill up with that love, or that warmth, or that empowerment.

Even if it's just for a minute, it will feel uncomfortable, but it's safe to feel the emotion. Remember I said this in the last episode? It's safe to feel that emotion.

We do that with negative emotions, but it's the same with positive. I've had to do work around being safe feeling excited. Feeling safe, feeling successful, because we're not sometimes used to those higher positive emotions. It sounds unfamiliar, and that primitive brain, Sue, does not like the unfamiliar.

So, giving yourself permission just for a minute to fill yourself up with that love.

That warmth, that security. And then go about your day.

As you normally would. But once you get comfortable doing a minute, then go to 2 minutes.

And then go to 3 minutes, and then go to 4 minutes, until you're able to hold that emotion.

For a period of time. Of course it's going to go back once you're you know, you get going into the day, but the more you consciously practice.

The more it'll come into your consciousness throughout the day. And then when someone's having a go at you, or they're disagreeing with, maybe your opinion, when you've got yourself.

Their thoughts then don't matter, because our thoughts are harmless. So when you realize that actually you know who you are, you get to let people be wrong about you, and that, my friend, is freedom.

Have the most amazing week. Speak to you next week. Buh-bye!