Girls Gone Wellness

Your Growth Is Making Some People Uncomfortable: The Dark Side of Becoming Successful With Renée Warren

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What if the problem isn’t that you’re “too ambitious” -it’s that you’re surrounded by people who are uncomfortable watching you grow?

In this episode, we’re joined by Renee Warren, founder of The Pink Skirt Project, for a no-BS conversation on confidence, entrepreneurship, relationships, and what it actually takes to build a life that feels aligned.

We get into why so many women struggle with self-doubt, why confidence is a skill you build through action, and why “balance” might be the most overrated goal of all. Renee shares how women can stop shrinking to keep other people comfortable, how to know when your work is passion versus avoidance, and why the right partner, friends, mentors, and community can either expand your vision or quietly hold you back.

We also talk about motherhood, outsourcing, buying back your time, networking in a new city, and becoming the kind of woman who supports other women without jealousy, comparison, or weird competitive energy.

Connect with Renée below:

Website is here

Instagram is here

Pink Skirt Project (event is July 9th & 10th in Kelowna, BC) is here

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Don't forget to follow us on Instagram @girlsgonewellnesspodcast for updates and more wellness tips. You can also subscribe to our Youtube Channel @Girlsgonewellnesspodcast to watch our episodes! Please subscribe to our podcast and leave a review—we truly appreciate your support. Let's embark on this journey to wellness together!

DISCLAIMER: Nothing mentioned in this episode is medical advice and should not be taken as so. If you have any health concerns, please discuss these with your doctor or a licensed healthcare professional.

SPEAKER_00

If you're doing all the right things, eating clean, taking the supplements, following the skincare routine, and you're still breaking out, bloated, burnt out, or just feeling off, you are not the problem. The problem is that the wellness world wasn't built for real women with real bodies, real stress, and real questions that deserve better than vague advice and viral wellness trends.

SPEAKER_01

Welcome to Girls Gone Wellness, the No BS podcast cutting through the noise with science, SAS, and Zero Shame. I'm Jeanette.

SPEAKER_00

And I'm Victoria, and we're naturopathic medical graduates who didn't just wake up one day and decide we were into wellness. We've spent the last decade learning the science, doing the clinical work, and graduating with the degrees.

SPEAKER_01

This isn't just another influencer podcast. We're not here to sell you a greens powder or to tell you to balance your hormones with seed cycling and good vibes. We're done with fear-mongering around food, detox teas, clean beauty BS, overpriced supplements that you don't need, and the biggest lie that you are the problem when it doesn't work. No, we're flipping the script.

SPEAKER_00

This is Girls Gone Wellness. Smart, sexy, science-backed, and built for women like you.

SPEAKER_01

We get into why so many women struggle with self-doubt, why confidence is a skill you build through action, and why balance might be the most overrated goal of all. Renee shares how women can stop shrinking to keep other people comfortable, how to know when your work is passion versus avoidance, and why the right partner, friends, mentors, and community can either expand your vision or quietly hold you back. We also talk about motherhood, outsourcing, buying back your time, networking in a new city, and becoming the kind of woman who supports other women without jealousy, comparison, or weird competitive energy. I think this might be one of my favorite episodes to date. Renee is such an incredible speaker, and I can't wait for you to walk away from this feeling so inspired just like I did. Enjoy the episode. Welcome to Girls Gone Wellness, Renee.

SPEAKER_02

Thanks for having me.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, I'm so excited to have you on today. I've followed you on Instagram for a while, and I love your videos. I think that our audience is gonna love this conversation so much. Me and Vic just graduated from naturopathic medical school medical school this time last year. So we're kind of jumping into this whole like starting our own business, entrepreneurial side of things. So it's a really important conversation for women in business. So really excited to get into all this with you. For anyone who doesn't know you yet, can you just share who you are, uh what you help women with, and then yeah, just what you do?

SPEAKER_02

Okay. So, well, really quickly, is I grew up just north of you ladies in northern Ontario, where we were discussing before recording that it's probably the world's largest mosquitoes and black fly population in the world. But I so I I lived a small town and then moved out when I was 18 and moved to Toronto and then traveled the world. But been an entrepreneur ever since I was 17. My mom told me to get a job one day and I went and started a business because I thought entrepreneurs made a lot of money and didn't work a lot, so why would I get a job? Turns out both can be true, but you need to put in the reps over the years to make it true. Um, and I've had several businesses in the content marketing, PR space. And then as of actually last year, so maybe two years ago, I started a Pink Skirt Project, which really teaches people, especially women, how to get rid of self-doubt and learn to be more confident. And this was from the years of growing businesses. I've sold agencies, I've made multimillions of dollars. And this is really, I would say, a passion project that, and let me tell you, when you're actually in a business that you love, work doesn't feel like work. If you know what I mean. And this is where we are today. And I mean, I'm all in the wellness space. We have our team of like practitioners and like doctors and naturopathic doctors. I believe that all medicine should come together to work cohesively because we all need each other. Some won't say that. But I do believe when it comes to like the fundamentals of entrepreneurship and what makes every female entrepreneur especially successful, is to have a foundation of health, of good health. And you cannot succeed without it. You will burn out, it will suck, and success will just feel like chaos because you don't feel well.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Oh my gosh. There's so many ways we could go with that. Um, you mentioned that you started your first business at 17. Were you always entrepreneurial? Like, did you always kind of have that spark in you? Because I know for me and Vic, I mean, I don't want to speak for you, Vic, but I never thought I was gonna be a business owner ever. And now I'm in the situation where it's like, oh, I actually, you know, need to be entrepreneurial and get all these skills that I never thought I was gonna have. Like, was that always something you had? Or do you think, you know, you've worked on it? Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

I think it's always I'm like an artist by default. And artists don't like systems because if you think about creativity, it's really hard to be creative when you're checking boxes. And so the artist's mind for me was about like making jewelry when I was younger. It was about painting, it was just like being really expressive and creative. And when you think about entrepreneurship, it is it's like art because you are trying to make something come to life in this world and make money from it and hopefully employ a team and make an impact. And so I think I was always entrepreneurial until I was 17 and I just found out what it was really like to start a business. And I've only ever had a corporate job for a year and a half when I was living downtown Toronto and I hated it. I hated the hour and a half long subway ride to work and then the hour and a half long. And I was like, what am I doing? Why am I wasting this time working for somebody else when I could be doing this for myself?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. I love it. Yeah, Jeanette, I do feel like I, I don't know. I used to, when I was a kid, I always thought I wanted to like own a wellness center. So I guess I kind of always have been entrepreneurial in that way. But I remember for me, my biggest moment was like when I was working retail, being like this 30-minute lunch thing is ridiculous. Like I shouldn't be stressed out about like running late because I wanted Starbucks. You know? Like that kind of annoyed me. I would like to be able to say, like, actually, no, today I need 40 minutes or whatever. So that was for me like that little push to I need to work for myself. You obviously work with very ambitious women and female entrepreneurs. What patterns do you see kind of over and over again when women are trying to build businesses? What are those like main obstacles that you see?

SPEAKER_02

The biggest pattern of self-doubt it's self-doubt. And here's the thing is we look at confidence as a very masculine thing. That if a if there's a woman that's confident, then she's like a B-I-T-C-H or something.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And so we want to preserve identity as being soft and kind and gracious and giving. So we don't want to be perceived as overly confident. But the most successful women entrepreneurs are both confident and kind. Sarah Blakely, the founder of Spanx, one of my favorite female entrepreneurs, is the kindest human. And she's uber successful. You look at people like Mel Robins, same thing. And so women are just not confident. And we're also like, if we really tear this all down, we're only looking at the last few decades where women could actually start businesses. And there was no question. So we're we're in this generation where we're deconstructing old identities of what it means to be an entrepreneur. And we're still, we're still bringing that like generational doubt with us. And we have this opportunity now to break that mold, to show that confidence doesn't necessarily mean masculine or taking advantage of people or being mean. It just means that you deeply are in the in the in the deep bowels of belief of what you do. And the other thing that coincides with that though is like you have to take action. Because I know a lot of confident people and they have these beautiful ideas. I want to write a book, I want to start a podcast, someone, and they don't take action. So when you put the two together, you have this thing called conviction. And we need more women with conviction. There's women that I coach that have the most beautiful businesses, the greatest ideas, the most perfect systems, but they're not doing the right thing. And the convicted women are the ones that are super successful.

SPEAKER_00

Right. Do you think that some of that lack of action comes from that self-doubt piece? I think it does.

SPEAKER_02

Well, and it comes, the lack of action is us thinking that every step has to be the perfect step.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

How we think this is a direction we got to go because this is what I've been taught and told, maybe schooling, maybe expectations, and we we forge ahead when really we should be going to the right. And we don't know that. So the moment we're like 10 steps ahead, we're like, oh no, I shouldn't be going that way. And to go that way means I have to go 10 steps back ways, backwards, and then 10 steps to my right. Then we think that we failed. And most people just give up in those moments, as opposed to maybe pulling back, easing off, or starting over. Who cares? Really, nobody's watching yet, everybody's watching. The people that are watching are only thinking about themselves anyway. And so we don't subscribe to failure because we think everything has to be pretty and polished. And you think about all the people that are successful in their business in life, all like the people in medicine, naturopathic doctors, they've all made mistakes. When you start up, you're like, what systems? What do I need? This is so expensive. Who do I hire? When do I hire this person? How do I do this? Let alone doing your actual practice, which is what you want to do. And you spend 90% of your time in the weeds and only 10% of your time practicing, it kind of sucks. And so you kind of have to like you put in the reps. And that's the other part that's missing in this whole equation, too, is we think we can get there faster. It's kind of like building a house. They promise you it'll take a year, and three years later, it's maybe done. Everything takes longer, everything costs more time, everything costs more money and mental bandwidth than we anticipate. And then when we were like, wait, this was only supposed to take a year and now it's a year and a half, then we start doubting ourselves. And then when we start doubting ourselves, we start walking backwards. And that's when we give up. Or we be okay. We're like, we're okay with mediocrity at that point. It's okay. This is safe, everything is predictable. I'm relatable. I'll just stay here. And you can't expand and grow if you're okay with where you are.

SPEAKER_00

Right. Oh man, this is already so good. We just started. I feel like I see that even with patients, like health plans, right? It's like so many people have this idea of like, okay, I'm gonna do 75 hard, for example, or this six to eight week meal plan. And they come in almost expecting that I'm gonna like give them the meal plan or whatever it is. But that kind of creates that all or nothing, like, I'll just start over on Monday because I had the cookie today. Like that kind of thinking is really taking us away from our success because instead of just keeping moving forward, even when we mess up, it's pulling us back, right?

SPEAKER_02

100%. I mean, I think about all the mistakes I made in running an agency and having to lay off people, fire people, get sued for wrongful dismissal. And I see in those moments, I'm like, oh, I just should have done that sooner or I could have done it this way. It's like, no, I genuinely believe you're supposed to experience everything you experience. Yeah. And if you believe good or evil, it doesn't matter because those things become your greatest lessons. In the moment, I mean, if someone's going through hell right now, you're probably thinking, Renee, that is so mean and absurd of you to say that. No, because when you come out of it, if you choose to not be the victim to your circumstance, it's the most beautiful lesson for yourself and for you to teach your people.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, totally. Yeah. Can we talk about the woman who genuinely loves to work? I feel like Jeanette and I fall into this category sometimes where people are like, you need to like chill out. Like you can work a little less, like this doesn't have to be your whole identity. But like, I get that. And I understand the idea of like having hobbies outside of your job. But what about when we really love what we're building? What would you say to that woman?

SPEAKER_02

Well, I would say, do you question Olympians going to work out and practice every day? I love that. Right? Like, would you say, oh, sorry, to the gymnast Simone, um, Simone Biles? Yeah. No, you can't go to the gym today and work out. No, you can't go and practice, you can't go in the beams of barge, because don't you do that too much? Would you say that to an artist who's painting like the Picasso of the world or the authors that are writing the most beautiful books? So, how is this any different? I don't think we look at it from that perspective that we are our own Olympians. And like genuinely, they're basically telling you to stop doing what you love to do. And also, like, can we change the word work? Like, I hate when I'm going to work, it's like not going to work. I get, I get what it means, but what about like I'm going to go build my legacy? I'm I'm working on my passion, I'm gonna go invest time into my people. And so there's no shame. The only time it becomes maybe shameful is if it becomes unhealthy. And if it becomes something that you're only doing because you're trying to avoid something else, it could be a bad relationship, it could be that you don't like your life at home, or it becomes like an addiction because it can. And when you look at it as like an avoidance mechanism, there's an issue there. But outside of that, if it's because you absolutely love what you're doing, then go for it. Be the example. People are gonna chirp, haters are gonna hate, but also anytime someone projects, it's because you've triggered them. And every trigger is simply somebody holding up a mirror to you. Why, why, why would they say that? Why would they say that you guys work too much? Well, it's because they see how passionate you are, how much you love doing, and it means that maybe you're spending less time with them. Yeah. And so now all of a sudden they're like, oh, I'm not important to them anymore. They feel un insecure, they feel unsafe, they're no longer feel seen and heard by you. That's not fair to them, but it's not fair to you. And that is not your responsibility of an issue to solve for them. That's their own crap. So I just think someone says, Oh, you work too much, then I just reply by saying, But you wouldn't say that to an Olympic athlete that they work out too much, would you? No.

SPEAKER_03

Not at all.

SPEAKER_01

I love that answer. I am gonna use that reply next time. Vic tells me to take a break. I'm sorry, I'm an Olympic athlete here.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, exactly. Like I'm an athlete doing my thing. Now, there's also something to be said about overworking produces mediocre results.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_02

So when you think about like when you get your best ideas, when you think about those moments that don't feel productive, like going to the gym or spending time with your family, they end up being the most silent productive moments because you need to rest. Right. Just like Simone needs to sleep and she needs to eat and she needs to be with her family. You do need that separation. And it's like the polarity of those things is really important. That's why you look at like super successful entrepreneurs are also they have a hobby. They may do pickleball. I don't know. They might do beach volleyball, but they have something else that uses a different part of their brain and different parts of their body so that they can actually experience something completely different than just work.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, definitely. I want to talk about this idea of balance. Like, do you think that there truly can be or should be a balance between like work and personal life? Like when you're trying to build something when you're in those like early years. And then, like, how do you kind of incorporate this? Like, do you have non-negotiables in your schedule to make sure that you're hitting all of these?

SPEAKER_02

Well, balance is bullshit. I don't know if I'm allowed to swear. It's BS. Yeah. I think if we're always striving for balance, we're always keeping score. And the moment that you start keeping score is the moment you start to resent the person who might have a better score. And also when we think about balance, it's like balance according to who, balance according to your mother, the way you were raised, balance according to society's expectations of you as a woman, balance according to what my macros should be every day. So it's like, sure, make your own balance. And I can't tell you how many times I've been thrown hate about how little time I spend with my kids or the types of like quality of time I spend with my kids. I have two boys. They're now 12 and 13 years old, but they're 11 months apart. And I started an agency in the same year that they were both born. And I worked through the whole thing. And I developed this identity as a power mother, power couple, power woman, and I loved that. But that meant I was not spending the time with the kids like I could have.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_02

Not like I should have, but like I could have. I was okay with our setup. I was okay with the fact that I wasn't with my children 24-7. Because according to who did I have to do, according to society, I've been told I was a terrible mother because I didn't breastfeed for long enough. I was and they don't know why I didn't breastfeed. I have my own personal stories. I was told I was a terrible mother because I don't believe in their school grades as being a predictor of their success as an adult. And so, and those are just projections. And so when you think about balance, I think about what is balance to me is creating systems and schedules. Monday nights, I get off every Monday. I can do whatever I want. I don't have to parent, don't have to clean the house, don't have to feed the kids, don't have to drive them to soccer, I take a bath or I hang out with my girlfriends. My husband and I do uh quarterly couples retreats. We go away for three days. We're actually going this weekend. Just him and I reconnect, hang out, we review our annual goals together. And so the balance is interesting because if you are always trying to create the balance, you will realize there's nothing in the world that will ever balance your life.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Because you'll get so addicted to that that when you get thrown a curveball, somebody gets sick, or you get fired, or you have to fire somebody else, or something happens, your car breaks down immediately, thrown out of balance, you go crazy. And so I actually encourage people to live an imbalanced life. Right? You need the cookie with your green salad, you need the fries with your salad when you're pregnant, by the way. Yeah, right? And sometimes it's a glass of wine or a diet coke, but it's like the imbalance is actually what makes things more exciting. And I think we fail to recognize that if we're always striving for like the perfect 50-50, then you'll fail.

SPEAKER_01

It's like what Vic mentioned earlier, right? When it comes to like your health, if you're gonna go on a diet and you're only gonna do it for a week, well, that's not sustainable. It's just like your life and your personal life, it has to be something that's sustainable. So I love that approach to things.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I think that's a better way of looking at it. There's no such thing as 50-50, but there's such a thing as sustainability according to you, because we all have different beliefs, the three of us here right now, based on something in our lives. And when when you look, when you ask me the question on 50-50, it would be like, well, is the balance according to what I think should be balanced or what you think I should think should be balanced?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And so my life is well balanced according to me. But you would think, well, Renee, you probably don't work out enough, or you don't eat enough greens, so it's not balanced. And 100%, I would take your advice and I would consider it, but not if it's gonna be out of integrity to my values.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

You know what I mean? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

There's a lot of parallels here to like health and always eat the cookie. That's what I say. Always. I'm never saying no to a cookie, honestly. Yeah, exactly. You touched on this before, but I really want to drive this point home. Like, how do you know when you're working hard because it's aligned with what you want to do? You're building your legacy, you're building your business, all this stuff, versus like working hard because you feel like you need to prove something, or like working hard because you're avoiding something, like you mentioned, or it's like an addiction. Like, how do you know when it's kind of out of that realm? You can feel it in your body.

SPEAKER_02

So there's like, I think about like the lawyers' children, right? So you get like a man and a woman married, they're both lawyers. There's probably high expectations that their children will be lawyers too, because that looks good on them. And then you have the kid that comes up and they know the industry, they're been surrounded by the legal industry for so long, they become lawyers and they have this incredible resentment. And they and they may be the best at it or not. And all of a sudden now they're they're on this career path doing something they really don't like to do, but it was expected of them. And they're really trying to prove to their parents that I'm a good son or a good daughter because I'm doing what you wanted. And it's like the love language from the parent is go and be a great lawyer, as opposed to just be a great human. And so when I think about like ambitious people working on their legacy work, there's also like seasons in life. There's the 20s, when you're in your 20s, you're proving to everybody all the time everything. Everything's pro, pro-proof. Look at me. I'm smart, I'm pretty, I'm funny, look at me. Then you get to 30s, you're like, wait a second, people generally start having children. Things shift, priorities shift. And then I can only attest to what it's like to be up to 44 years old because that's how old I am. But when you turn 40, there's this thing called give no F's 40s. You start caring so much about external input, external validation, because you've lived so much of your experience in life and you've you've faced so much crap that you have a better sense of who you are. And so the question is really better answered based on how old somebody is or their lived experiences versus it just being something they like or not like. But I will say you always feel it in your body. And it's like the Sunday scaries is a perfect example of do you love your job or not? I used to, so when I ran a PR agency, every Sunday night I could not sleep. I never slept. And I'd wake up in the morning with just anxiety in my chest, and and I would be sick all the time. And I just had no motivation in life. But I get to work and it's super successful business, making lots of money, serving lots of clients. And so it'd be shameful to walk away from that or close that down. But really, it's not because why pursue something you have no desire just because it's something that people expected of you, or you're good at, or you've married into it, or you've inherited it. I don't think that's fair. I mean, that's control and manipulation, if I haven't heard of anything. So you know that you are working towards like the right thing in your life when you can look at your calendar and it's a busy week full of lots of stuff and it doesn't overwhelm you. Because it's it's passion work. Yeah, and there's no there's no expectations because you're just doing the things that you love to do. And that's for me, it was like the pink skirt project coming full circle to creating this movement. It's just it did it with ease. And like the first time we had an event, went and walked through the venue. I was like, this is the place we're going 100% here. And when I asked the lady how many people could fit in that room, she said 350. So then I said, Well, that's how many tickets we're selling. And I've never had an event like that before. All the expert advice I got was, hey, why don't you just have 30 people, test out the idea, see what it's like. And I said no, because the vision was very clearly 5,000 people. So 300 is good enough. And we did it. We sold out, standing room only, like crazy energy. It was like the most epic day. Yeah. So I think we make a lot of choices, and like that's the thing I don't like about like the transition from high school into college, is that you're asking 16, 15-year-old kids what they want to do when they grow up. I'm like, they just they're what they're going through puberty, they have no clue what's going on. And they're asking them to make a decision on the permanency of what they're gonna do for their life. No way, Jose.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, no way. Yeah, it's pretty crazy.

SPEAKER_00

It's so true. Yeah, even for me, I mean, I wasn't in medicine at all until my third year of school when I'm in my undergrad. And I was like, well, I don't want this degree and I don't want to work in HR, so now what do I do? And I had to completely change things, but it's true. At 18, I had no idea.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, right? It's not fair. There's so much pressure to just be an adult. Yes, yeah, so much pressure. And I think about like academics in certain parts of the world, there's so much pressure on like five-year-old kids to know multiplication and like read these crazy, and now they're like, look at my kid can read this textbook and like that we couldn't even read. Like, that's great. And like now, all of a sudden, that identity is like instilled in that kid that they're hyper intelligent, and now they have to go and leverage that as opposed to exploring other things that might pique their curiosity. Yeah, and it is manipulation and it's control. And so, like, I never want to raise my kids like that. Like my husband and I are both entrepreneurs. People like, oh, your kids will be entrepreneurs too. We're like, we don't know. We'll they'll pursue whatever they want to pursue and we'll we'll support them just as long as it's legal. Keep it legal.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it's the only thing.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I love that.

SPEAKER_01

The only boundary.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, break the law.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Um, I love what you said too about how there's like seasons of things too. And I was thinking about how a lot of naturopathic doctors who've been in practice for a while will tell you, they'll say naturopathic medical school is the most unnaturopathic thing you'll ever do. And Jeanette and I experienced that firsthand. It's been impossibly hard, the especially the last year with getting licensed. It's like a year of board exams that are very much like not actually testing your clinical skills. But it made me feel like at one point I was like, do I even want to do this? Like I'm waking up resentful of something that I used to have so much passion towards. And I was worried because I'm like, I've put everything into this. But every naturopathic doctor says, like, get through it, and you are going to feel like you never worked a day in your life.

SPEAKER_02

Also, this is such a great thing to highlight is never let process muddy your passion. Because you're like, you kind of have to do this to check the boxes to do this legally, right? And so thankful you're getting through that too. And it's it's true for so many things in business. It's like tax season. I'm so glad we're out of it. It's like you still have to do these things. And so, like, I don't like waking up every morning in April when you're trying to collect the receipts from the thing that you charged a year ago. Like, no. And so those seasons, it's like, well, because when you're reminded of the bigger picture of who you're trying to impact, the people are trying to help, then you can get through those tough days. Yeah. And they happen.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Yeah. I'm glad you said that. Cause I did, like, I did question for a while. I was like, oh my God, why did I pick this?

SPEAKER_02

But also, like, I bet you in those moments, you're like, oh, I hope this isn't what it's like for the rest of my life practicing. And it's not, it's it's a stupid way of trying to figure out if you are smart enough and skilled enough to do the thing. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

So true. You have said that confidence is a skill, not a personality trait. How do you actually build it, especially for women like us who are just kind of starting out and don't really have any experience?

SPEAKER_02

In the doing action steps, it's like, you know, those people that talk the talk, and there's people that walk the walk. Well, the walkers are the ones that are actually taking those steps. And so when I think about all the things that I've done in my life, like wrote a book or launched my podcast, we're like 470 episodes in. I had no clue what it meant to do podcasting. We started over six years ago. And I figured it out. You know, the first 12 episodes, I recorded myself with the person I interviewed. I edited everything. And I'm like, wait a second, this really sucks. I don't want to do this anymore. But it's like confidence getting on stage. Well, you won't build the confidence unless you get on stages.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And by the way, this counts as a stage, right? It's a virtual stage, but it's still a stage. So the confidence in like wearing a bikini, it's like, I don't know, put something on that is a little bit uncomfortable for you right now, but don't put the bikini on right away. There might be like confidence in asking for more money, charging more. Well, then the way to do it is you just start charging more. Confidence comes, like I talked about earlier, in the depth of your belief plus your action. And that's the creates the conviction. And so you can have, you can still have confidence to be on stage and still be nervous. That's okay. You can still have the confidence to charge more and still worry that maybe that'll be too expensive for some people. But I will say that the only way to actually truly, truly grow a business or be in alignment with the work that you love to do is to have the confidence to do the scary thing.

SPEAKER_01

I've always been someone that's been scared about getting on a stage and like, you know, have like being scared about presenting in front of people and all of that stuff. So being a host on a podcast is like the worst possible thing that someone could ask me to do. But it always was something that I wanted to improve because I'm like, well, I'm gonna have to talk to patients. I'm gonna have to like get on in the community, like I'm gonna have to do this at some point. I I can't keep like pushing it. So I mean, I was terrified, but you know, we've interviewed so many different people, so many different people that have different communication styles where you have to like adjust to people. So it's been like such a great experience, but it's like what you said like you can't just want to do it, you actually just have to do it. Yeah, it's and it's such a great primer for anything.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, you hit the nail on the head by saying how you can communicate with your clients when they come through your clinic. Yeah. Same thing. And it's like we want an articulate naturopath to be talking to us using words that we would understand.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, because you think about these people who are showing up, like divulging some very personal information. And you have to be charismatic, caring, patient, kind, and listening, and then be able to express what you think is their protocol for them. And the better your communication skills, the better you're gonna show up. And honestly, like the more money you'll make.

SPEAKER_01

Yep. Can you tell us a little bit about the Pink Skirt project? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Oh my gosh. So talk about vision and talk about waking up in alignment with the work you love to do. I was at a conference in Palm Springs in 2017 when actually, no, I was at dinner with friends in 2017 when we were going around the table answering what we thought success was for it for ourselves. And I had this like very clairvoyant image. It was me in a bright pink skirt on a stage in front of a thousand people. And I'm like, what is this? It was, I'm I'm a visual kind of person. And so I was trying to tie meaning to it, no clue what this was. Fast forward 2019, go to the conference in Palm Springs, and it was for creatives and artists and influencers, and part of the event was fashion shows. So I was sitting like Catwalk side of this brand called House Saperna. The first model that walked down the catwalk was wearing the pink skirt of my vision, and which I have hanging in my office I look at all the time as a reminder. And I was like, what does this mean? This is this is the skirt. This is great. And I was telling my friend next to me the story. She's like, we have to buy it. I eventually did, and hung in my closet for years. And I knew I wanted to get out of the world of PR and agency life. So the skirt was like this icon for something. And I and I didn't know. And we actually went through the motions of this becoming a documentary or a series for Netflix, and we had the production company, and we went down that path. And I said, this isn't it yet. Could be, I don't know. It's a movement. And it really came down to this, the pink skirt being iconic and synonymous for feeling safe. It was like, you know, like the superhero's cape when you needed it, or it was like the bulletproof vest, the armor when you needed it too. It also signifies like the collection of women's successes and failures and the stories that make us who we are. And so I was like, this needs to be an event. I don't know what it looks like, but I want lots of hype and pink and color and just like really fun. And it was a full day. The first event last year was our inaugural event. And we had over 300 women in that room, 300 pink skirts, which was crazy. Some epic speakers, and we have a coaching program too. So I teach women in business the confidence to actually grow and build. And we have our second annual event coming up in Kelowna, BC in July. 450 women. Wow. Epic speakers. Yeah. And so kind of like when the vision is clear enough, the answer will reveal itself. Yeah. And there was a woman probably a year ago when she sent me a picture on Instagram with her and her pink skirt, and she said, I needed a little extra motivation and inspiration today because I'm going into a bunch of tough meetings. I need the confidence to feel like I can handle today. So I put on my pink skirt. And I'm like, that is it. Doesn't have to be a pink skirt, but the idea is that she was confident in her in her body in that moment. Yeah. That she went in with conviction, into those meetings, crushed the day, and it was the best day. So the Pink Skirt Project is a movement and really helping women build the confidence and conviction to believe in themselves, to like ask for more money, ask for a raise, get the divorce if that's what they want, ask to have more kids, like whatever we passionately desire to make space for that to be a reality.

SPEAKER_00

I love it. This is so needed. And I can like feel the passion through the screen. That's amazing. That sounds so, so great. I want to have a little bit of a shift here into a conversation that when Jeanette and I were talking about this episode, we were thinking how important relationships are in health. And we talk a lot about how, like, we'll be sitting with a patient and they will say their biggest issue is that when they have to cook a separate meal because their husband won't eat what they're eating or whatever it is, they just don't feel they have that support. It's a big obstacle for them achieving their health goals. And so it made us think in this position where women are wanting to start businesses and be entrepreneurial, how important are those relationships that we have in our lives, whether they're friendships or uh romantic relationships, and how do those things influence like our self-doubt and our progress in building businesses? So we wanted to kind of shift into that uh zone for the rest of this conversation. Um, and just starting off with like, what are the green flags that you would see in a partner when you're a woman who has big goals? We'll start there.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. Green flags are when you when you share a dream or a desire with them, the first thing they say is, absolutely, how can I support you? As opposed to all the excuses and reason why you can't. Yeah. That's in friendships too. And it's like when they when they when the maybe the romantic partner is like, well, how are you gonna afford that? Who are you gonna do it with? How much time is this, as opposed to be like, yeah, yeah, sister, you go, yeah, babe, let's do this. Like, what do you need from me? You know, and like oftentimes there's like, there's like there is a reality behind it too, where we sometimes need to know how much it's gonna cost. And like, who's gonna take care of the kids? But if it's constant, it's like there's so much to unpack. With friendships, I actually have this framework called the friendship ascension gap. And it's a reality that most women will face, have to face, especially if they're growing in business. And what it is, is where you have your friends that are growing maybe at the same pace, and you're kind of budding around along and you're growing, and then all of a sudden, one person starts to excel. Their growth is faster, their trajectory is faster, they're making more money, they're getting better connections, their friendship circle expands to make with people with bigger influence. And the friend that was relatable to that person in that moment now all of a sudden starts to see them as a threat and starts to pull them down. So you can still have people like that as friends that don't have the same trajectory, so long as they're still blowing air into your wings, as I describe it. And what happens in those moments has nothing to do with your growth. But a lot of people, especially women, will take their foot off the gas and slow themselves down to make other people feel more comfortable. And that's why women are often stuck at the same level. Yeah. And so, and like men kind of do this too, but men are just so like to the point about whether or not they like you or not, or they'll support you or not. Women just like, oh my God, it's just it's annoying sometimes. So the the red flag is when you can sense that this person sees you as a threat. And that like it hurts. The green flag is when you say, I'm going on this spaceship. I'd love for you to come. And they say, What color spaceshoop are are we wearing? Like, when are we leaving? Let's go. They don't have to meet your energy, they don't have to meet your growth so long as they respect your ambition and want you to be successful. And the hardest part of growth is actually what I call the shedding season, is when you when you're getting to that next level or that next chapter, there's people that self-select to fall off because they can no longer handle your ambition, handle your growth, handle that excitement. Or worse, they feel like you owe them something because they were there during those tough days when they're like, hey, but I was the one who picked up the phone at 2 a.m. when you were crying. Like, now you owe me for that. Or I gave you that advice back in 2017, May 13th, about what you should do, and now you should owe me for that. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And it's unfortunate how many friendships self-select to remove from your life because they can't handle facing their own realities of their lack of ambition, or they become the victim to their circumstances. They'll say, Well, you didn't have to go through this, you didn't have that, you didn't. Nope, that's right, you didn't. And that's not your fault. And you don't want those people in your life. You just say no. Pray for them, wish them well, and like here's what happens every single time. Guarantee, when you decide to release them with pure love and joy, the most magical humans show up in their place. It's like, wait a second, this happened to me le recently. And I think of like a spaceship with only certain seats on it, right? There's only like a certain number of seats, and those seats are your friends or your cheerleaders. And when certain people decide to remove themselves, it's like, I got an extra chair. Are you joining me? Now I have the most incredible friendships with like people like Jen Gottlieb and Lori Harder, who I never ever would have fathomed being in my corner, texting me, cheering me on. And so the release of that friend doesn't mean it has to be evil or mean or anything. It just means you need to replace them in with somebody who actually sees the vision, dreams bigger, and wants you to succeed.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I like that. And it's hard to and I I think of when you're saying this, I think of like that whole law of detachment idea where it's like you can detach from them without that kind of negative energy attached to it. And you know, my mom used to always say to me, you know, friendships sometimes have seasons, right? Reason, season, lifetime, and that's okay too. But it's a huge, it's difficult. I feel like that's something Jeanette and I have experienced too in the last little bit. It's just kind of how like we've outgrown certain relationships. Um, and that's it's difficult.

SPEAKER_02

It's scary. So Dan Goh, who's an exceptional human, taught me one of the best lessons. He said, in my 40s, there's one thing I wish I would have learned to do better was to grieve. And I always thought grieving meant to be saddened for somebody who has passed away. But the reality is that we grieve losses every single day. Like maybe friendships, or maybe your favorite coffee shop closed down, or maybe they no longer serve your favorite type of coffee. And we're saddened by these things, and it's grief. And like the grief of losing someone you thought was a friend hurts almost as much as somebody passing. And when you can get better at managing that and those emotions when they show up, the test really is how much can you celebrate them even after they've left? Even after maybe it wasn't such a great departure. Because they did have those incredible moments in your life. You share that expansion together to a certain point. How can you celebrate them regardless? Because I know energetically what you put out into the world comes back to you. And so you have to wish them well. Release them, like release them because the more you hold on to those stories and you're like, oh my God, she hates me. She's now talking crap about you behind my back, you're holding on to that. It's like you're still tethered to that person and you don't want to be. So there's this high whole idea of like cutting of the cord. Have you heard this expression before? We are tethered to each other somehow or another. Yeah. And that negative being tethered negatively, you need to cut the cord. And that that you're giving yourself permission to forget about it and then you're releasing them, but like in the most beautiful way. Yeah. We need to get better at that.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, I agree. Absolutely. I love that advice. I'm wondering if someone is very ambitious and high achieving, and they have a partner that let's say is very supportive of it, but they are opposite in that like they're totally cool doing their nine to five, doing that what they would see as like their bare minimum to make whatever they need to support their family. And that's that. But they are supportive of you and your dreams. Can that work or is that too big all the time?

SPEAKER_02

So my husband and I, we do these couples retreats. We've done them in Cabo, Mexico. We did one in Tulume this February. And here's the here's the reality: is do you know many successful marriages where both people are super uber ambitious? Hmm. There's not too many. No. Because I do believe that the polarity is what keeps a marriage alive. And so, like my husband and I might be an exception to the rule, just uh Sarah Blakely and Jesse Itzler, exception to the rule, the hermosis. There are exceptions, but they're also different personalities. And I actually think it can't really work if they're both overly ambitious. Oh, okay. Because then you're competing against that energy. And so, like, I'm ambitious 100%. I don't work like my husband does. I'm not, I don't go, go, go like he does. Because we even said, hey, Dan, if I matched your energy, I would have had so many broken bones by now because we'd be heli skiing and we'd be doing this thing. It's like, nope. And also, we need like the default parent. We need the person that's gonna be at home with the kids. I don't mind that rule. I don't, I want it. So 100% it can work. It's probably one of the most beautiful partnerships, so long as they're both supporting each other in that ambition.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Okay. I thought your answer was gonna be different. So I'm glad that you you touched on that. That's super interesting.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I see it a lot. And here's the thing, too. Like the person that has the nine to five job could still be the one working harder than the person that's running a business. Yeah, that's true. You know? Yeah. So if if we're comparing hours worked, that's a different story.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I guess it goes, it's the same, right? Like opposites kind of attract. Is that kind of what you're going?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And and and the real relationships, like, I mean, going down this route, because my husband and I have done so much work here with spiritual therapists, parenting coaches, you name it. And the real relationships work. Okay, every relationship is real. The healthy relationships work because the individuals recognize that the issue with the other person isn't the other person.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

It's that person's issue with the issue that the other person projects. And the best matrimony is a reality that your significant other is going to hold up, mirrors to your biggest weakness. And basically saying, I'm triggering you, it's because this is the work you have to do. And when you believe that to be true in every relationship, you guys together on this podcast with sisters, with friends, with boyfriends, girlfriends, whatever it is. You, it is the most therapeutic expensive thing you can do. Think of any single time you're triggered by anybody, has nothing to do with that person at all. Zero. They've done nothing wrong. It's just them saying, Hey, girl, Vic, you got to work on this thing. This keeps bugging you. Like, do the work. The work is for you to explore. Now, listen, men are not perfect. We know this. And now there's this whole, like, there's this whole trend of like women saying how much they'd rather have married another woman, and I get it. Because men are messy, they're loud, they're dirty. I and so the triggers for me is like the dishes are always on the counter. And my one of my really good friends at the time said to me, it takes 12 to 15 minutes to clean up the kitchen. Now you can choose to spend a lifetime being angry at this person for never putting their dishes away, or you can accept it fact or fate that it's a reminder they live there too. And it's like, what are you actually choosing to fight about? Is it the dirty dishes? Because what does that actually mean? Because if you actually unpack it, it means he doesn't respect me, he's taking advantage of me, like he doesn't respect my clean house. And he does. He's just, I don't know, lazy. He's got priorities doing other things. Yeah. And so, like, unless it's like manipulative, controlling, and narcissistic behavior, which I have no experience around, it's like the little things over and over that really piss you off is the work you have to do. Because think about it, where does that show up in your life too? It's not, it's not about dirty dishes, it's not about the fact that the 12-year-old boy doesn't flush the toilet. It's like, where else in life is this showing up? Because that is that's the reality. That's your reality of the work you have to do. And it never ends. The work never ends. It's constant until the day you die.

SPEAKER_03

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01

I know I remember when I was talking to my therapist about this kind of situation reframing all of this. Like, you can't, once you've learned this is how you're supposed to think about things, you can't think about it in a different way. It's like this is how you have to go with like these situations. It's so true.

SPEAKER_02

And think about emotion. I got to figure out what study this is from, but an actual emotion that we experience in our body, anger, excitement, frustration, whatever it is, can only really last, like real emotion in your body for 90 seconds. So anything beyond that starts to be the story you're telling yourself about the thing that just happened. And so, like, you know, my son Noah came into the bathroom this morning and I was running late to come down to the office. And he's like, Can you help me do my hair? Because he's got one arm and a cast. And I'm looking at him and I'm just like, I don't have time for this. And I got so angry and he started walking away. I was like, oh, what do I not have time for? Like, if I was to tell anybody on their deathbed, the most important moment in their day was probably right there. So I called them back and I said, Bud, I'm sorry. I'm also not good at this, but how are we doing this? I was not late. And I got that moment with my son. So when I reflected on the trigger, I was like, oh my gosh, he did nothing wrong. I was just frustrated because I was mad at myself for not being on time. And now I took it out on him.

SPEAKER_01

So that the work, it's in the triggers. Yeah, it's very important. What would you say if, you know, you're a female entrepreneur, you have say it's like a romantic relationship and your partner's totally on board, you know, go do what you need to do, and your business starts growing, and then you know, the relationship kind of turns. Maybe your partner's getting insecure, maybe they're getting distant or resentful. Like, do you think that that's something that you can work on, or does that kind of go deeper?

SPEAKER_02

Oh, I mean, you should be working on it before it gets like that. Yeah. Yeah. So when you're in these seasons where it's like everything seems too good to be true, right? So it's almost like you're waiting for the ball to drop. It's like, mm-hmm. It's like you know that things could go either way. You have to be continuously doing that work. And so in these moments, I talk about the friendship ascension gap. This is exactly it. And it shows up in relationships too. Where all of a sudden now they're like, they loved you with this ambition, they loved this growth, but now all of a sudden you're starting to actually achieve it. And what's happening is you're simply showcasing to them where they failed, where they didn't actually do the work for themselves, where they didn't put in the reps to grow like like yours. So it's no different than a friendship with a girlfriend, zero. Except it's your significant other. And so now it's like this is where women tend to cool off and start to get comfortable again because they don't want to bring discomfort into the relationship. And so, what is the advice? Well, A, don't stop at all. It's almost it exactly it's a perfect test, and I hate testing a relationship to see how far you can actually motivate and inspire them to grow as well. But it's about being real and honest and patient and kind, being like, hey, babe, you know, I've seen you the last couple months. You haven't been supporting me as much as you used to. What's going on? Like, why can't we just be like no sugarcoat, hold on to their sweet little faces that you love so much and be like, what's going on? Like, like they will start to talk and just just listen, don't coach, just listen, and it'll the truth will come out. And 100% of the time, it's because of their lack of ambition. Has nothing to do with what you've done or are doing. Yeah. But just you have to promise yourself not to slow down or stop because of that. Because you're going to, as you grow, you're continuously going to make other people uncomfortable and it's going to come from the most unlikely places. But here's the beauty of all this: the amount of people you inspire while you grow. The amount of lives you change because you're actually doing the thing you wanted to do. Yeah. And there's no denying God's work, if you believe in God's source energy, what it is, that when you're given this idea and you become extremely passionate about it, it's because you're supposed to do the damn thing. And also when you have the partner who all of a sudden stops being supportive, that's you helping them realize something about themselves. And it's nothing to do with you. And it's a tough lesson because some relationships end because of that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, absolutely. I wonder how much of it is learned through this like tox, oh, we'll call it toxic masculinity perspective, where it's like, I'm supposed to be the breadwinner as the man, and I'm, you know, and now this woman that I've married is making more money than me. And what what does that make me as a man?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, because they go back to Beers of Buddies and they're like, oh yeah, your your chick wears the pants in the relationship, you know, and like all of a sudden now they don't feel like the tough guy. Right. Here's what happens in like the pattern of the village is like he doesn't want to become the outcast. He doesn't want to be like removed from the village.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_02

And this is why for women, it's been so hard to keep growing. It's we're we're we're baking generational curses by being the women that choose to keep growing towards their passion as opposed to like pulling back to make their partner comfortable. Yeah. Like it makes me so sad that this happens. But either way, too, both men and women.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, totally. You had mentioned um earlier that you built your business, like in probably, let's say, the busiest season of your life when you had your two kids. And I know a lot of women are trying to build businesses in the same years that they're also thinking about marriage and pregnancy and kids. That's what Jeanette and I are experiencing as well. How do you coach women through that tension, especially since it's something that you experienced yourself?

SPEAKER_02

Oh, well, I I say don't do what I do. Because I had both my babies in the same years launching an agency. Oh wow. I think this is becoming more acceptable, but getting help around the house. Like we have a full-time house manager, Betty. She's been with us for five years, but we've had somebody in that role for six and a half years. And small town, East Coast of Canada, people always commented. Oh, Dan probably like outsources this and Renee outsources that. It's like those comments come from because they've never experienced it or they feel like they won't ever earn it. Yeah. And I will say asking for support, like really asking for it, not just like whatever someone will offer, but saying, This is what my ideal week looks like. Let's make it happen. How this started for us was we had a cleaning lady come once every two weeks, and then she came once a week and she was there for eight hours. And I was like, Shannon, what happens if you split the days Tuesdays and Fridays, four hours each day? You can do laundry and groceries on those days because I hate the grocery store so much. She's like, Yeah, sure. She goes, but you know, I need five hours each day. I was like, perfect, an extra two hours a week, which which ended up building, and she was two full days eventually. I was like, How did we get here? And then Dan goes, Why don't we just get somebody full time? Like, no, no, why would we do that? It's so stupid. Why would we have somebody else do our laundry, cook for us, make our beds, mow the lawn? Wait a second, this sounds fantastic. And so we kind of did it like secretly, too, because my parents made comments, his parents made comments, or so we secretly had this help. And then eventually my friends are like, wait, so who, how do you hire for this person? It's like, yeah. And now it's like it's so common to have a version of that, whether, you know, in Europe it's like an au pair, it could be a nanny, it could be, you know, and like here's the thing too is we oftentimes have these people in place, like a cleaning lady. My sister's like, I'm overwhelmed. And, you know, we got so much laundry and all this stuff and groceries. And and I said, Well, Michelle, how often does your cleaning lady come? She's like, once a week. I go, could you afford an extra hour? She's like, Yep, absolutely. I go, have her do your laundry and go to the grocery store. She's like, Well, she wouldn't know what to buy. I go, there's a pen and paper, and you make a list, and you give it to her. She wouldn't know how to do laundry. She scrubs your dirty toilets. Of course she's gonna know how to do laundry. We think that we are responsible for everything. It's like you become the ultimate delegators. My husband wrote the book, Buy Back Your Time. And in that book, it's this it's our life delegated. And so, what like if I asked a mother, hey, would you love to get an extra four hours a week back to play board games with your kid or build Legos or do whatever, play Barbies? I'd say yes. Where do I find that time? And what's the one thing you don't love to do if around the house? For me, it's cooking. Would you pay somebody to get or here here? The better question is would you pay for four extra hours a week with your kids? Like if someone's like, hey, I got four hours for sale, would you? Yeah, they would. Perfect. What are you delegating? Well, I love to cook. Well, that's great, but do you love to cook or do you love to be with your kids? Could you do it together? Awesome. I think that we think of these things as in silos. So ask your cleaning person to come in and do something extra or run an extra errand or to ask somebody in your team that does this thing to do this thing too. It's like there's no shame in that. And women just don't ask. Like, I don't bring my kids to their doctor's appointments, to the dentist's appointments. I know, like in the Bible of what it means to be a good mother, I'm a terrible mother because like I'm like, do you guys even care if I'm there? They're like, no, we don't even want to go. But Betty does a great job. Now, if they're going to the hospital for broken arms or they need to get blood work done, of course they want to be there. It's a different story. But when when we read the book of what society expects us to do, 90% of it is BS. I say burn the book, create your own rule book. And honestly, the first few months or first few years, people are gonna say stuff, let them. And then they'll eventually ask for that book. You can share it with them.

SPEAKER_01

They'll ask for the phone number.

SPEAKER_02

They'll ask you like the person again. You're like, yeah, told you, told you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, exactly. Um, we've had Dr. Jordan Robertson on the podcast before. She's a naturopathic doctor here in Ontario, and she's done a lot of work with buying back time for naturopathic doctors. She created confident clinicians. So it's this whole database um essentially for NDs where you can go, you can get all your information, treatment plans, templates, all that stuff, save your time. And she's really talked about this whole idea, really, of saving time in your practice. And I think we can apply that same thing to saving time in our personal lives as well.

SPEAKER_02

So oh yeah, I mean, wherever you can, and it's not even saving time, it's buying back your time. Right. Yeah. And it's buying back the time to work on the stuff that has the most meaning for you and your business and not doing all the stuff in the weeds. Now, my CEO poked his head in the other day and he's like, Renee, feedback for you. We need to stay out of the weeds. And I looked at him and I was like, What's the weeds? And he's just rolled his eyes. You know what the weeds are. And we default to doing the easy tasks that we have clearly delegated to other people because we feel a sense of productivity when we can check the boxes off doing stuff. The task I have to do with the call that I did before this, which is why I was late, was a coaching call for my content. And he was telling me all the stuff that I was doing wrong and where I'm missing the mark. And it's a lot of like replaying stories of what it meant to be an entrepreneur and the confidence stuff and like bearing children and all this. He goes, Nobody else can do that work but you because you are the ones with the stories. And I go, what about all this stuff? He goes, Oh, the things you've systematized or you've delegated, why would you even bother? That's not where you're supposed to be focusing your time. We know the work that we have to do, right? And sometimes it's not the fun stuff, but it's the needle-moving stuff in our business. And we just have to be true to ourselves on where we focus our time or energy, who we focus at with. And like the truth about our North Star. And it excites some people and it scares some people because the thing that scares people about pursuing their passion is the people that are gonna be left along the way, the projects that are gonna have to die despite all the work we've put in, the new realities of our life. And if you can get comfortable with the discomfort, then you can do anything. Anything.

SPEAKER_01

I love that. If I know this could be a whole episode in itself, but I have to ask this question selfishly. If you're a woman just starting out, maybe moving to a new city, zero connections, how do you how do you network when you're newer and you you feel like you know you're just new in the field, you're new into the the city, maybe, and you know, you feel like you don't really have anything to offer. Like, how do you get out there? How do you kind of talk to people? What are some steps that you can take to get yourself out there professionally and even personally too?

SPEAKER_02

Like everybody has something to offer. I say, like, the people think it's just like there's like an easy button for all of this, and all of a sudden, poof, all these people are gonna appear. Here's the easiest thing: there's a chamber of commerce, if you're an entrepreneur in every city, sign up, it's a couple hundred bucks a year. Go to their networking events. I live in Kelowna, there's a thing called Kelowna Women in Business. It's like the equivalent, but for women, sign up, it's a couple hundred bucks a year. They have lunch and learns, they have meet and greets, they have events. If you can start by like finding those one or two people and think about the activities, there's like a running club here and they meet every Wednesday, and it's like so much fun. We do founders' hikes on the mountain every Tuesday morning. Like, I think when people ask the question, is they're just too lazy to do the work to find these people.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

How about going into one of the restaurants or the shops that you know is owned by a female entrepreneur and just talking, say, I'm new here? Like, where can I go to meet new people? Or like, what's cool? That's going on that we love to share. We love community. And I think you just have to really just it's you got to do the work. Like, I've been here for five years now. Six years? Yeah, six years. And I'm finally figuring out the community. And there's every city has so much to offer. It's just a matter of like finding the and then the tribes shift too, right? Like social circles move, form, evolve, grow, shrink. And it's just a matter of like finding that tribe in the season that you're in. I'd say like when I got here, I went to CrossFit right away because I was heavy into CrossFit on the East Coast and instantly community. Instant.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, it exists. Yeah, it's true. It's funny actually that you mentioned the Kelowna uh women in business because Jeanette and I went to Kelowna, I guess this was two Octobers ago, to shadow a naturopathic doctor, and she had them at her clinic. So this whole group of amazing women were all there. So it's funny that you mentioned that. Yeah, it's an awesome.

SPEAKER_02

Who did you shadow? Are we allowed to talk about this on air?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, Dr. Britney Shaberhorn.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, I know Britney. Yeah, she's awesome. Yeah, she's lovely.

SPEAKER_00

So it was really cool just even to see the community that she's built, just with other women who are listening.

SPEAKER_02

She is so good at that because she's kind of newish to the community. And she identified the opportunity to like to get an ideal customer in like ambitious women. And so she's always going to entrepreneur events, not necessarily to network with other entrepreneurs, but to find her clients.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Because they're the ones like if you think about an entrepreneur, an entrepreneur is typically willing to do things that go against the grain, right? Naturopathic doctors, you know, woo-woo against the grain. Because we know we need that support. We do. Yeah. And so it was very um strategic of her. And I admire that about her. Yeah. Yeah. She's great.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, yeah, definitely. Uh, before we close out the episode, I would love to know what are some signs that you are a good potential mentor, collaborator, referral partner, friend, girlfriend, wife. Because I think it's so easy to say, like, these are the qualities I want and the people that surround me, but I also want to be that for my friends and for my relationships. So, what are those like signs of you're you're doing good in that department?

SPEAKER_02

You're if you're doing it for yourself, but you're doing it for others as well. I would say this it's probably the most important thing you can invest time in is your community and your network. Because if you lost it all, if someone wiped all of your money out of your bank account, you lost your house, your car, everything. Yeah. And you had a network, you can rebuild a much faster. But the only way to do that is to pour into it. So this is you making introductions. This is you blowing air into other people's wings, like pumping them up on social, buying their books, buying their stuff. I always say to my friends, don't send me the stuff you're selling for free. Send me the link on where to buy. Because I believe friends should be the first thing to purchase and not the ones that expect your stuff for free ever. And listen, some of the most successful entrepreneurs are the ones who just keep making those connections. Because you make the right introduction between two people because you know it's meant to be, and they just blow up because of those two people. That looks great on you. Right. And now people can trust your opinion and who to introduce to because you've made such a valid introduction. So be the connector without expecting anything in return because it always does come back to you no matter what. Good or bad.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, this was so amazing. I feel so inspired after this conversation. Um, thank you so much for coming on today. Can you let our audience know where they can find you, where they can find Pink Skirt Projects, your podcast, everything like that?

SPEAKER_02

The best way is to go to Instagram, Renee underscore Warren. And if you want to find out about the event, you can go to thepinkskirtproject.com. Check out tickets, July 9th and 10th in Kelowna, if this airs before that. If not, it's gonna happen again next year.

SPEAKER_01

Awesome. Thank you so much for coming on today. Thanks for having me. Yeah. Thanks for listening to Girls Gone Wellness. If this episode made you feel seen, smarter, or just a little less alone on your wellness journey, send it to a friend or tag us on Instagram at Girls Gone Wellness Podcast.

SPEAKER_00

Before you go, take a second to leave us a review. It helps more than you know, and it helps more women like you find their way to wellness that actually works. Want more? Head to Girls Gone Wellness Podcast.com to be the first to know about new episodes, exclusive merch drops, and everything we're building behind the scenes. Because feeling good in your body shouldn't feel like a full-time job. It should feel grounded, confident, and maybe even a little sexy too.

SPEAKER_01

We'll see you next week. Until then, trust your body, question the noise, and don't let anyone tell you you need fixing. This is wellness on your turn.