We Were Never Meant to See Our Own Faces

What if the way you see yourself isn’t the way you’re meant to know yourself? For most of human history, people lived their entire lives without ever truly seeing their own face ,  their identity was shaped by how they felt and how they impacted others, not by a constant reflection staring back at them.

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Transcript

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Welcome back to Strength in Numbers. This is Katie, and today we're gonna talk about something that completely stopped me in my tracks for the first time. When I heard it, we were never meant to see our own faces. Think about that for a second. For most of human history, the only way someone knew what we look like was from the faint reflection in still water. Or from the way someone else described them in a conversation. Maybe there were no mirrors in every room, no front facing cameras, no selfies constantly, no internet to constantly question our question ourself. No endless photos, no endless videos. Your identity was built almost entirely on how you moved through the world. Not how you looked while you did it. Now we live in a time where our own faces stare back at us constantly, whether that be in mirrors, selfies, social media, zoom calls, even on the block screen of our phone. And it's changed us. I think we've shifted from living in ourselves to living outside of ourselves, always aware of what you know, we might look like to someone else. And while there's nothing inherently wrong with knowing your appearance, it's worth, worth, it is worth asking. What has that done to us? So the truth is, for thousands of years, human beings didn't build self-worth on constant visuals. It was never, you know, saw your own face. You had to rely on how you felt or how people treated you and the impact you left on others. So your self-image wasn't literal. It was like almost more emotional. And that's something I think we've almost lost completely. We've replaced, how do I feel with, how do I look? We've replaced what I'm capable of with what others will think when they see this. When you're training, especially if you're building, you know, muscle strength, you know building muscle, this shows up in a big way. You can feel strong, powerful, unstoppable, and then you catch yourself in the mirror from the wrong angle. Maybe that bad lighting that hits us, maybe mid rep. Suddenly you're questioning everything. Have I been there? Have, have I, you know, the workouts where I felt invincible until I caught a reflection and thought I am not making any progress. But here's the thing, progress is not always visible right away. In strength training, the victories, you can't see, you know, that extra rep, that heavier weight, that stability in your form. Nothing feels better when the form clicks. I can speak from so much experience on that is failure. You need to fail fast because then that's how we learn, you know, the, those, the often changes come from, The inside before it's even visible changes. If you're constantly checking the mirror and you're grading yourself on the delay, you are grading yourself on the delay. You are not gonna get that immediate satisfaction. You are missing the real time wins. That's why I talk about mirror PRS versus performance prs, you know, mirror prs about how you look. Performance prs are more about what you can do, and the truth is the performance ones are the ones that last forever. If we were never meant to see our own faces, maybe we were meant to trust the reflection. Others give us. Not in a glass, but in words and actions. I think about moments when someone has described me in a way that completely caught, caught me off guard. You know, a friend telling me, you're the strongest woman I know. You know? And my daughter, the way she looks at me and says, you just never quit. You know, maybe somebody else, you know, you made me believe that I could do more. Those reflections, those ones from the people who truly see you are so much more valuable than anything a mirror could ever show you. So imagine if you imagine if you never saw yourself again, how would you know who you are? You'd have to feel it, right? You'd have to trust it. You'd have to pay attention more to life that you're living and not imagine, not so worried about the image you're projecting. So here's a challenge that I gave for myself when I wrote, wrote this down in my journal. I said, how about we train without mirrors for a week? Feel your form. You know, spend more time journaling how you felt during your workout. Instead of how you looked, ask someone you trust to describe how they see you. When you're in your element, when you're laughing, when you're lifting, when you're focused, you might totally be surprised at how much more accurate that is than your own reflection that you see. We were never meant to see our own faces. Maybe that was a gift. Maybe it's still one we can give ourselves if we're, if we're willing to step away from the glass every now and then, it is, it is their one thing that if there's just one thing that you could take away from today, let it be this. The mirror is not the final judge of your worth. For most of human history, people lived loved without ever truly knowing what they looked like. And they were free to focus on who they were. We can choose that too. So next time, if you catch yourself in the reflection, pause and ask, is this how I really feel? Or is this just a surface version of me? Sometimes we just have to take a step back as fast as the world is moving sometimes. We just need to take a moment. Being genuine is so far gone these days. People do things for clout. Um, you know, whether relationships, friendships are true, true friendships, you know, how how much can a friendship or relationships go through? To whether or not you figure out this is the real deal because there's so much projecting. Projecting. I know I have gone through so many changes in life from being a mom, wife. You know, I lost my way multiple times and I've looked myself in the mirror and questioned who I was, you know? And going through the skin cancer has made me realize how much. Genuine people in your life matter. When you go through the hardest parts of your life, you want the people that are gonna come in swinging for you. Not because you have something to offer them, but because they wanna see, they wanna see you get better. They, they care. So I truly appreciate you guys taking this moment to, you know, listen to these podcasts again. Um, I know there's so many exciting things, um, happening on Tonal. Um, this week. Uh, we have Joe's live class on Saturday at 11:00 AM Eastern for his 12 weeks to Jack. Um, so I will be there and also I will have my giveaway that is on my Instagram. So make sure you are a part of that and, um, I'm possibly gonna be out for two weeks for another skin cancer surgery, but we will see, just waiting to confirm the date. Um, so we'll see when that is scheduled. Um, I may be able to put it off longer or I maybe come sooner than I had thought, but we will see. So thank you so much for spending time with me. You know, on the Strength In Numbers podcast. So go live your, go live in your body today and let the mirrors just be glass again. I'll see you guys next week.