I Am Well

Mindset Mondays - How to trust in yourself to make the right choices?

• Episode 59

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In this episode of the I Am Well podcast, Jemma dives into the importance of believing in yourself and trusting your intuition, even after past setbacks. She shares her personal journey of rebuilding self-trust and discusses how past mistakes can shape us rather than hold us back. Perfect for anyone ready to strengthen their mindset and embrace personal growth.

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Hello, and welcome to I Am Well podcast. I'm your host, Jemma, a nutritionist and a hormonal fasting coach, passionate about self development through a holistic lens. But my biggest mission is to help empower women and get them to reconnect and trust their bodies again. So if you're a woman who just wants to better herself and live her best life, You're listening to the right podcast, so let's get to it.

Hello and welcome back to I am well podcast and welcome to mindset Mondays. Today we are getting stuck into personal development once again, but also believing in yourself and you know, you might be thinking like. Oh, that's so la dee da, believing in myself, you know, believe in myself again. No, seriously, because this is something that I have been going through myself recently, [00:01:00] learning to trust myself again, learning to trust my intuition again.

And. I think this is so relatable for so many people out there, because what happens with intuition and not trusting ourselves is things happened in the past where maybe we made a decision that didn't work out the way we wanted to. And then this creates a memory in our brain and our brain goes, Oh, we don't ever want to do that again.

In case something bad happens and we don't succeed again. So our brain figures out a way to protect us. It's basic human instinct, right? Like this is how we have survived as a human race for so long. But the thing is we need to remember and realise that mistakes that happened in the past, they are there to help us grow.

And, I'm so excited to get. stuck into this episode today. Before I do, I just want [00:02:00] to remind you all that if you want to work with me fuller, fuller? If you want to work with me further in 2025 on strengthening your mindset and creating a life of health that works in sync with your hormones, then I have two ways to work with me.

I have my balance program. However, you literally only have one more week to join that. Otherwise, if you want to work with me on a more personal note, so one to one highly recommend you looking at the links in the show notes below, clicking on that and kind of getting an understanding of what I have to offer first and then book in a clarity call.

Now this clarity call with me is completely free. It is a way of us getting to know each other, getting to understand what you need, and getting to make sure that we are a correct fit together. Because I don't want to waste your time, I'm sure you don't want to waste [00:03:00] my time, but. I want to get you the results and I just want to make sure that I am the person to do that.

I do work with any of the health practitioners that you are working with currently. So if you have a naturopath, if you have a dietitian, a doctor, I work. I'm always about collaboration. I will never say, don't listen to them. Listen to me. I truly believe it's a partnership here. And sometimes dieticians, naturopaths, and doctors, they don't have enough time to focus on lifestyle. And that's what I bring to the table. It's focusing on lifestyle, getting to the nitty gritty and the root cause of what's really going on. And they can do all the big tests for you, which is amazing. So that's why I like to collab and work in sync. Now, moving on, let's get stuck into today's episode.

So first off, I just want to share a little bit on. I just want to share a story that can kind of help you set the [00:04:00] scene here and understand where I'm coming from and why and what I really mean about trusting yourself again. So for me, for me, it's a money story and I'm sure we've got, everyone's got a money story, right?

Now, as I said, for me, so I realised for me that I still have. subconscious blocks when it comes to money that are still there. And no matter how much work you do on yourself, sometimes there's always going to be these blocks. So it's about learning why getting to know those parts of you and then helping to manipulate and change the way you're thinking to help you grow rather than halt you from growing. So for me, I just know that there was a time where I, I've been investing in myself a lot. Especially this past year in [00:05:00] self-development and I love self-development and I love business growth. Like it's been amazing to help with my business, but sometimes you do come across, like you have some coaches that are amazing and they help you get to a certain point.

And I've had other coaches that have got me to other points and I've spent a lot of money on some that maybe didn't get me the exact results that I wanted to. So. In the end, it came to down to like me reflecting on the, the year that I had prior. So 2024, and I was kind of thinking like, Oh, I invested all this money so I could get my business to this point.

It's not at the point where I wanted it to be. And then I feel like I've, I failed, you know, like the, the money that I invested didn't get me the results I wanted. So what happens is then I start to blame myself and I start to go, what have I done? , I've invested all this money. It didn't work out.

As I said, my brain has [00:06:00] now remembered that, and it's now holding onto that. And it's going to go, okay, we're going to be extra careful now that you don't spend so much money again. And then all of a sudden you don't, you know, you're wasting the money and you're not getting the results that you wanted.

And I all of a sudden didn't even realise I was going back to past Jemma from like five years ago, where I had all these thoughts like I'm not good with money. I can't handle having money. I, I'm not responsible enough. I'm not smart enough to figure it out. So. I was like pushing money away without me even realising because I just didn't trust in myself.

And it wasn't until I was speaking to a new business coach I'm with started this year and. I really wanted to do this next course. And I was saying to them, I can't though. And then they're like, why can't you? And I said, because I don't trust myself again. I've seen what happened in the past. I didn't get the results that I wanted and I don't [00:07:00] trust myself.

And then they said, don't you see there what you're, you're doing right there is. You're not, you're not looking at it from another point of view, you're looking at it from what you didn't get this past year and not what you did get, what you did learn, what didn't work, the failures that, that, that, the things that didn't go to as planned and then going back and thinking, why didn't that work?

Why didn't you know what, what went wrong here and there, because that is the biggest takeaway that you can have so that you can change things around and create that growth. And I was like, Oh my gosh, it was like a light bulb moment. Of course, like this is everything that you get taught in self development, but what happens is we go back to our subconscious programming.

And this coach really had me thinking and I was just like, yes, I am going back to that scared Jemma, especially, you know, a lot of our [00:08:00] learnings from how we are today is a lot from like what we learned when we were kids. So I'm going back to the scared Jemma that watched her parents have amazing jobs, you know, make good, good money.

Like it wasn't. you know, it was, it was good. It was above average, I would say, but they were always too scared to spend it. They were always very, very. we're very conservative with it and we're always worrying about money, you know, , if we go to the movies, you can't get the snacks cause the snacks are more expensive, you know, that kind of thing.

I'm sure you've like probably had similar stories, you know, it's cheaper to go to the supermarket. So you go to the supermarket to go get your food and then you sneak it into the movies, stuff like that because we were always worried about money, but we didn't really need to. Like we didn't always need to worry about money.

Like we never went on overseas trips. That was just. Um, way too much money and, um, couldn't even correspond spending that much money. [00:09:00] And these are the sorts of things that I saw when I was a child. So without me even realise I'm implementing that same stuff into my own life. And that's not to say that how you grew up is how you're going to be now.

It's just about being aware of it and going back and, and doing these things that we're going to get stuck into today. So this comes with like anything in life, right? Um, All the decisions that you make, you know, parental decisions, being a parent is so tough, you know, making, making sure you're making the right decisions as a parent and making sure you're making the right decisions in business, in anything in life.

I'm sure you can agree. And what's the common denominator in all of this? Well, it's the fear, isn't it? Right? Like the fear of failing the fear of. Losing all your money, the fear of failing as a parent, um, accidentally impacting your kids in the wrong way, it's a fail of fearing in [00:10:00] business.

That's what the common denominator is with everything. So instead, we always hold ourselves back because we're way too scared to make the wrong decision. And this is the biggest mistake and the actual, the biggest wrong decision you can actually make, which is. Like so contradicting in itself. Hey, so it's not your fault that this is the way it is because In today's society, there is so much mentioned out there on tools and education.

All this stuff is being bombarded to us. Like as soon as we wake up, there's, , information on, you know, how to handle your finances, how to live a healthy life. Like all of these things, like how different diets that you can try, like for your lifestyle, you should be doing keto. You should be doing. animal carnivore diet.

You should be not having carbs. You should be having carbs. Like it, it, it gets [00:11:00] overwhelming. So, so much to the point where you start second guessing yourself. You start like, I don't know what's right or wrong anymore, and we've completely forgotten to be in sync with what feels right to us. That's it at the end of the day, like technically I'm giving you so much information in these podcast episodes, but you need to remember you have the power to make the choice.

You need to know what suit sits with you well, and what doesn't, what resonates and what doesn't just because I teach a fasting lifestyle does not mean you have to live a fasting lifestyle. That's what worked for me. And I love how. I feel from it, you might resonate from doing things a different way, and that is completely fine.

And we need to be okay with that. And that comes back to trusting ourselves and making the right decision. Yes. Listening to the advice and the education out there, but implementing it in a way that works for you. Like there is so much noise [00:12:00] on living away. In a holistic health way where you've got zero chemicals, you know, chemical free.

Well, from my experience working as a skin therapist, I know that some chemicals are actually beneficial in certain products, especially skincare. You know, they put preservatives in there to benefit us and make sure the product doesn't go bad. Um, and some preservatives have been proven that they do not harm us.

But, you know, there's other advice out there. It's like, if you can't understand the ingredient, don't buy it. Well, sometimes that's like the biggest myth. And that's just what I know and what I've been, you know, my education is around. So that's what I implement in my own life. So, yes, I try to live as organic as possible.

But I also know that some chemicals are not that bad for us. I've been seeing so much noise at the moment on sunscreens. People have stopped using sunscreens now [00:13:00] because they're like, they're terrible for our health. All the chemicals are so bad. There's So much noise out there. You know how overwhelming that can be as a mom and as a parent, you're trying to do the right thing put your sunscreen on your kids, but then you're also like, Oh my God, but now I'm also giving them chemicals. I'm bombarding their bodies with chemicals. I'm going to hurt their hormonal health. We need to take in the information, understand it, but then. Do some education of your own and understand and do what feels right for you, okay?

Would you rather your kids burn? Or do you think it's better to at least put on some sunscreen knowing that that's a little bit of chemicals in there? And they, they, they're not going to burn though and get peeling skin that's gonna hurt them because that's the, the harsh reality of it. We live in Australia.

Our sun is so, so, um, the UVA and the [00:14:00] UVB rays are so impactful. You've gotta weigh up the, the choices. , you know they say zinc based sunscreen is better because, um, you know, it just sits on the surface of the skin. The skin doesn't actually absorb it like chemical based sunscreens do, but. If you were, were out one day and you had this big beach plan with your kids and you wanted to take them out to the beach, and they were so excited, they're in their bathes, they're all ready to go.

You get there, you get to the beach, you open the bag, you realise you don't have sunscreen in the bag. You, you've got screaming kids and they just wanna go to the beach. The quickest, um, easiest option for you to get sunscreen is that convenient store that's around the corner. You go to the convenience store.

They don't have any zinc based sunscreens. They only have chemical based sunscreen. And you try to find the best option, and you choose it, but you're feeling overwhelmed because of all of the, the, the information out there that chemical based sunscreens are. Uh, saying in that moment, you need to come back to yourself, trust in your [00:15:00] intuition, trust in, think back and understand what is the right choice for right now.

Is it better in that moment to not put sunscreen on them at all and just hope that they don't get burned, um, from the sun? Or, get, get the, the sunscreen that you know will work at the time and it's what you, the option that you have at the time, put it on them and you know at least they're not going to get burnt.

Skin cancer is so much scarier than, um, absorbing chemicals into our skin, like, over time. Like, it, by the way, it has to be over time. Like, you have to constantly be using that stuff, plus all the other chemicals. Plus, walk outside, guarantee you're sniffing in chemicals. It's all about listening to the noise out there, understanding it, understanding the education around it, and saying thank you for that.

But I'm going to make the right decision that what's right for me and owning that be okay with that. Anyway, I used a really big, long example. Then let's move on so making decisions, right? Making [00:16:00] decisions is all about today's episode. Um, studies show from the Cornell university that like the average adult is actually making 35, 000 decisions a day, 35, 000 decisions a day. Did you even realise you're making that many decisions? You know, how, um, depleting an energy that can be, how exhausting that is, but you know, by the end of the day, you're like, you don't even want to decide what's for dinner anymore.

No wonder that you're having arguments with your partner on what to have for dinner because you're so exhausted with all the other decisions you had to make that day and you're not even realise those decisions. So this is about learning to trust in yourself and making the right decision for you. So the more that we don't trust in ourselves and trust in this decision making the more fatigued we become So if you're exhausted by the end of the day and you can't decide on dinner It's probably because you weren't [00:17:00] trusting in yourself with all the decisions that you made prior and that all comes back to that self confidence, that self belief.

And we need to learn to connect with those parts of us. So, um, let's jump into rebuild, how to rebuild that self self trust in, in health decisions. Okay. So trusting your body's signals is the most empowering thing for your health you can do, and this is why I highly recommend tracking your cycle.

Tracking, not just your cycle, because maybe you don't have a cycle, right? Tracking your symptoms day to day. Download my, um, cycle tracking chart. It's free on my website. I'll link it in the show notes here below. Download that. And just track your symptoms each day, because you're going to get a whole lot of information from yourself than you will from Google.

So trust [00:18:00] in tracking your symptoms, get to know what's going on in your body again. And um, Yeah, because it's tough with all the diets and the trends and the wellness advice out there and it's changing all the time. It is always changing the health advice. So, it's exhausting to keep up with. Eggs are bad, eggs are now good, fats bad, fats good, all this stuff and you're just like, Oh my god, I am so exhausted, someone just tell me.

What to do, and the reason you're saying, someone tell me what to do is going back to that fatigue that you're not trusting in yourself. You're not trusting in your decisions, and it's, this is why it comes back to that circle coming back to you and trusting your decisions again and how to do that. Track your symptoms, track what's going on with your body, get to know your body, get to know yourself again.

And you will be more empowered to make decisions that you know is right for you. So that's when it comes to health. Um, you know, like [00:19:00] this is another amazing statistic actually from the Nutrition Australia. But did you know that over 60 percent of Australians struggle with conflicting health information?

So that's More, way more than half. So you're not alone. It is exhausting and it is overwhelming. This is why you need to listen to the advice, but be confident enough to know what works for you and what's right for you and be confident and empowered enough to know that it's okay that people won't agree with you.

How boring would the world be if we all just agreed with each other? So it's okay if someone isn't following the same path as you or isn't doing the same health advice that you're doing. Know that that's okay. Just do what works for you and your lifestyle. So part three I just want to talk on is like the financial and the career decisions around making those sorts of choices and trusting yourself with that again.

Because that is something that even I've had a big journey and a big growth on like literally this past [00:20:00] month even. Um, so money decisions, they can often like have like a huge weight on us. So many people struggle with making financial decisions. And it's probably because they've felt, you know, that burn in the past from themselves.

They've made financial decisions that maybe didn't pan out the way they wanted to, and they got burnt in the process and they're like, Oh, I don't want to do that again. Um, And it all comes down to that mindset shift again. Remember that that's just your brain it's wanting to protect you.

So it's trusting yourself to know, no, it's okay that it didn't go right for me back then. Doesn't mean that's going to happen now. And the best thing is failing because when you fail, you then can improve, you can change, you then can make sure you don't do it again. You try something else. Never, never, never. Be afraid to fail. So when it comes to like making those financial decisions, what I want you to do is [00:21:00] first off, understand what you value most because everyone's financial decisions and investing in something is going to boil down to what they value most and be okay with that. You know. If you value having big brands in your life and you love having Chanel or all, I don't know, Prada or all the things.

If you value having big brands and celebrating with that, that's okay. That's what you value. And own that. Be okay with that. I'm no, definitely not a financial advisor here. So I'm not saying go out and buy heaps of big brand items. I'm just saying that, you know, if it comes to, you want to celebrate things and you want to buy yourself a big brand item, just know that that's okay because that's what you value most.

But maybe like for me, what I value most is. Spending time with my family, but making sure we're doing like having experiences. So I love going [00:22:00] on adventures with the fam, you know, going and exploring new places, going to things that the kids can do, like that's so much fun. So I'd rather, you know, put my money, my savings into a spot where I know that it's going to build up so that we can then, um, go out on all these fun adventures together.

So it's all, and that's fine. That's fine too. It's, it's fine wherever you spend your money, but you just have to know it's what you value. So go back to like what you value and then start small with making any decision. Really always start small, prove to yourself again, that making these small decisions.

Is going to be, it's going to be okay to your brain. Um, so don't go out making any huge financial decisions yet. Just start off small, you know, for example, like set a savings goal each week. If you can't save right now, just put away like $5 a week. Just put, I'm sure [00:23:00] like you could do like 3 a week.

Anything that you can do, put that away. And that tiny little decision that you have made will have massive impacts on your brain. Your brain will actually start to go, Oh, I can save money each week, even though it's a small amount, your brain doesn't know the difference. So you are proving to yourself that you can save.

So if you have that belief of I'm not good with money, I can't save, prove to yourself you can by just putting a tiny small amount.

Um, I've done this recently and it's an account like I can't, I don't access it. It's a goal savings account. I do it just, um, it, it doesn't work manually. It works automatically is what I'm trying to say. It's going automatically each week. I don't even notice it. I don't even see it. I don't even look at it, but over time, I'll keep going back to it and I'll be like, Oh, There's that money there.

Oh my God. I'm a good saver. See, it's [00:24:00] proven to your brain that you can save. So just start small though. You don't need to do anything huge. And then what the last thing that, um, you want to do with like making these, trying to trust yourself again and making these financial decisions is do a reflection, activity. So reflect back on what worked, reflect back on some wins and pull out any wins. As I said, like looking back at that savings account, maybe there's only 30 in there, but make that a win. As I said, your brain doesn't know the difference. So just going back to that account and going, Oh. There's 30 in there oh gosh, I'm a good saver. That's a win. 

Doing reflecting back and trying to pick out wins will help transform your brain and will help make it think that, well, you do trust in yourself. Again, you can make the right decisions and choices because 50 percent of Australians actually experienced financial stress at some point in their lives like, that's a statistic from the [00:25:00] Australian Psychological Society, um, but I'm sure like, it's, it feels like it happens more than that. Like, how many people do you know that are stressing over their finances? So learn to trust your instincts because then you can reduce that stress significantly. And as we all know from my Wellness Wednesdays, stress impacts your health so, so much, especially your hormonal health.

Okay. So in this episode today, we've talked a little bit about trusting yourself again with your health and trusting yourself again with your finances. And as I said, that's something I'm going through. So I'll just quickly share with you, like even on the finances, this is what I'm doing in the. Before I go to sleep, I actually put on a meditation.

It's from Insight Timer. Insight Timer is free. So, I use the meditation called, what is it? It's Attracting Abundance. I did write it down somewhere and I've lost my notes. Um, but if you want to know which one it [00:26:00] is exactly, just reach out and I'll share that with you. Uh, it's from like Happy Minds Meditation.

Search that on Insight Timer and you just put that on every single night and you just fall asleep to it and then in the morning I get up Insight Timer again and I use another guided meditation that just goes for like, I choose different ones in the mornings, um, I just go from like a Nine minute one up until like a 15 minute one.

Like they're all range differently and it's always about like attracting abundance or trusting build, rebuilding trust with finances again. 'cause that's what my biggest subconscious block was. I also read a book on connecting with the parts of yourself that are saying those distrusting thoughts, you know, having, making you hope those fears that are popping up, connecting with those parts of you again, and understanding where they're stemming from.

Cause most likely you'll find a time back from your childhood where it, where it stems from. And then I work on that time from my childhood to make [00:27:00] sure that it doesn't. How that, to make those big transformations and then I, lastly, I journal on this. So journaling. Ha, there are so many amazing facts.

I could go, go on and on about journaling, but not journaling on like, oh, how my day went, dear diary, I did this. Like journaling on those thoughts that, those parts of me that come up and understanding what those parts need in order to help heal them and move on. So, conclusion from today's episode. Let's like wrap up on this and go, let's get some key takeaways for rebuilding trust within yourself.

So first off, start small, celebrate your wins. Trust is built one step at a time. Remember, don't make any too, don't do any big decisions just yet. Just start small and start convincing yourself that you can make the right decision. Tune into that inner voice. Through practices, like I said, like journaling and meditation, get to know [00:28:00] those parts of you, why they're coming up and get to like, pretend they're like a little child within you, you know, what do they need from you?

Do they need to feel safe? Do they need to feel secure? Well, how can you get that part of you that, um, journaling on that is amazing in itself as well. And then remember that anything that didn't work in the past, any failures, any mistakes, that is massive growth for you. And that is not a bad thing. So never fear investing into something and then worrying that it won't work out.

You know, you can never really go wrong when you're investing in self development. Or, or investing in your business or something like that. Like, because anything you, any mistake you make, take it as a learning curve that I've had the biggest growth from 2024 because I just kept taking risks. And yeah, I got to the end and started distrusting myself with money because I started thinking, have I done the wrong [00:29:00] thing?

Because my past self came up, but once again, I invested into a coach and they helped me understand that that's that little inner voice. That's screaming out at me. So that's growth in itself. Keep reminding yourself that any mistakes, anything that, that didn't work out the way that you wanted. It is massive growth for you.

Self trust, it's not about always getting it right. It's about trusting that you can handle whatever comes your way. And each time you prove to yourself that you can do that, you are going to grow exponentially and it becomes easier and easier each time to make those decisions. Everyone has to start from somewhere, right?

You're not going to have it like that right off the bat, but this is what it takes to build that confidence. So that's all I have for you today. Thank you for listening to today's episode. I hope you gained some clarity, some confidence [00:30:00] from this episode. If you liked this episode, please don't forget to leave me a rating or review.

It means more to me than you'll ever know. Otherwise reach out and yeah, I love chatting to you guys. Um, on my Instagram DMs, I'm always open to a little chat. Otherwise I will talk to you all in the next episode. Thanks for listening guys. Bye.