Stethoscopes and Strollers
Welcome to Stethoscopes & Strollers! I'm Dr. Toya, mom of two, OBGYN, and coach for physician moms. Here, we go beyond the hospital halls, into the messy, magical early years of parenting—think diapers, sleepless nights, and figuring out how to deal with all those unexpected twists and turns.
Every episode, I dive into topics like mental health, the ins and outs of postpartum sex, sorting out childcare, and how having little ones changes your marriage. We’ll talk about getting back to work after baby, the real deal with mom guilt thanks to those tough doctor schedules, what pumping at work is really like, and how to keep all the balls in the air without dropping any. We’re here to get real about the hard choices, like deciding to stop breastfeeding, and so much more. This is a space for focusing on taking care of you, because managing scrubs and swaddles takes a village.
You'll figure out how to ask for and actually accept help, because let’s be honest, getting support is crucial for thriving as both a mom and a doctor.
Just a quick heads-up: while we're all about sharing and supporting, remember this isn’t medical advice. We’re here to connect, share experiences, and grow—together, without the medical jargon.
So, grab your coffee or tea, and get ready to dive into those parts of being a physician mom that don't get talked about enough. You're not riding this roller coaster alone, and you definitely deserve all the support you can get.
Tune in to Stethoscopes & Strollers for some real, honest insights and practical tips to make momming a bit easier. It’s time to get the conversation started!
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Stethoscopes and Strollers
113. If You’re Hesitating About Childcare, Listen to This
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Hey Doc
I had a moment recently that stopped me in my tracks.
My kids were heading out for a full day—something fun, something special—and I wasn’t there. And instead of guilt?
I felt peace. Gratitude. Relief.
Not because I don’t want to be with them. But because I know they are well cared for, loved, and having a full, joyful experience, even when I’m not the one making it happen.
In this episode, I’m talking about what it looks like to build a life that actually works with support.
We get into:
- Why the right childcare supports you, instead of replacing you
- What it can look like when your kids are cared for and you can focus on your work
- The shift from “this won’t work for me” to “how could this work?”
- Why so many physician moms hesitate to invest in help, and what that hesitation is costing
If you’ve been telling yourself that getting help isn’t an option, I want you to at least pause and question that.
There may be more possibilities than you’ve allowed yourself to consider.
🎧 Press play on Stethoscopes and Strollers.
And if you know a doc who is stretched way too thin right now, send this to her.
What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!
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Hey Doc, I just wanted you to know what was on my heart right now, and it is pure gratitude for my au pair. She just sent a photo of my children going out to the aquarium. I have friends in town from California and. they're going to have a play date that they don't even know about because I didn't tell my kids that their best friends from California are here.
So they are going to get that surprise and they're gonna have a fun day at the aquarium, and I can continue to be at home and work. And they are well cared for. They are loved, they are happy. Of course, they would want us to be there with them, but. I am just so grateful that they're not just stuck, not doing anything.
Because we are so busy trying to grow this business for them and for ourselves and for our lives, and that we are not riddled with guilt, trying to stretch ourselves extra thin, not giving the business the attention it needs because we want to be more present for them. Everybody is. Being satisfied and is feeling the love.
They are involved in this business as much as they can be. They draw signs for the general heating and air all the time. My husband has one of the signs that my son drew, stuck in his service van and I could not be more grateful for. My au pair because she is facilitating all of this. We could not have done it in this way with them still being entertained, still being educated, being well cared for without her. And this is an appreciation for her and also an encouragement for you if you are holding back on getting childcare. If you are questioning whether the au pair program is worth it, whether you wanna spend money on that nanny, I'm telling you, you can create a life and a relationship with your children where the care is supplemental. It is not. Instead of you, it only feeds and fuels. You becoming the best parent that you want to be.
You can do that. You can make it so. So whatever the hesitation is, please, doc, I beg you, consider, how can this work? If you are thinking, no, this is not gonna work for me. I don't want anybody in my house. I can't afford it. Ask the question, how can I make this work? How can I afford it? How can I be comfortable with somebody in my home?
Because that opens up your mind to actual possibilities, and you'll be surprised what you come up with. And if you really can't think of it, please send me a message. DM me, email me at hello@drtoyacoaching.com. We will. Go through it. And just to be super clear, I'm not taking any more private clients right now.
I'm locked in with my current clients. 'cause yes, I am still coaching. I am just committed to getting you childcare. So please reach out. Let's talk about it because I want you to experience this. don't.
Assume that I am so much busier than you because I'm starting a business from scratch. In a brand new industry, you are all sorts of different kind of busy. It's not more or less, it's just different. So I know this feeling that I have right now of gratitude and joy. can be shared by you as well.
It does not matter that you are not starting a business. It doesn't matter that your kids are not homeschooled. It doesn't matter that your life looks different than mine. You can share in this feeling we are a lot more alike than we give ourselves credit for. So take this. As your sign, if you are holding back to, maybe reconsider, how can I make the childcare happen because I want this for you.
This feeling, this joy, as I saw that photo of my sweet, sweet babies smiling, ready to go to the aquarium, not even knowing what bigger surprise was, waiting for them, like it just warmed my heart. And I'm grateful and I can focus on what I have to do to continue to provide for them moving forward. Ugh.
It feels so good. And I want this for you too, doc. Okay. Send this to another doc who is drowning because she does not have childcare. If you're like, yeah, Dr. Toya, I got it. I have my au pair I have my nanny, my mom lives with me, whatever. You know, somebody who is not so fortunate, so please send this to her so she can hear this message and start asking the question how I will see you on the next episode of Stethoscopes and Strollers.
