It's Just Not That Serious! A Mindset Pep Talk

This episode is just a friendly reminder that life just isn't that SERIOUS! My hope for this episode is that it gives you permission to RELEASE any pressure you feel to be perfect, "get it right", or perform in ANY area of your life, no matter how small. Life is FUN and MESSY. 

The next time you find yourself dwelling on something and feeling immense pressure to make the right decision (or even finding yourself procrastinating making a decision), ask yourself "is it that serious? will this matter in 5 years?" and allow that reality to move your forward more quickly.

I hope this is helpful! If it is, PLEASE share with a friend! 

Love you, thank you!

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Transcript

Speaker 2 0:40

Hello. Hello. Welcome to another episode of the podcast. I'm so glad you're here. I love coming on here and just sharing with you the things that I've been reflecting on and things that have been happening in my life in real time that I am dealing with in ways that I am moving towards them in a positive way or maybe ways that I didn't realize I was kind of. Maybe quote unquote messing up or just not dealing with it the best way and helping give you what I learned from that. Because I always think of these episodes as though I'm sitting down with a friend at a coffee shop, or maybe we're having a happy hour glass of wine sangria, something like that. And you are just sitting there with me and we are saying, oh, well this last week I did this thing, didn't love it, and this is what I'm working on. Or, oh my God, this last week I discovered this thing and it's really been helping me with my relationship with my mom, or my relationship with my husband or at my job. And it really has shaped the way that I am thinking about my body or. Something like that. So I love coming on here and talking about this. In this last week, I have had some of these thoughts rattling around in my brain. I'll say it's not even just been the last week, but when I go through my days, every once in a while I'll notice kind of a theme or a lesson or something like that that I'm learning, or even a problem that I'm dealing with that I haven't quite figured out yet. And when I notice a theme or something that is consistently happening. In a few different areas of life. Then I think, oh, that would be a good podcast episode, and that's what I'm talking about today. And really the crux of the episode is basically just. Like, girl, it is not that deep. It is not that serious. And I'll get more into that, but that's kind of where my, that's the, the lesson that I'm learning right now and the thing that I'm battling a little bit right now, and it's kind of popped up a couple places. So I'm gonna talk a bit about that and about how we. Can go through life and maybe just make things a little bit less serious, make life a little bit more fun and freeing and just feel a lot less weighed down by all the things that we are maybe making a little bit more serious. Then we need to. So that's what I'm gonna get into with today's episode. Before I move on, I do wanna remind you that if you like these episodes, please send them to someone. Who you think would benefit from them. I just like do it right now. Take out your phone and be like, Hey, I love these episodes. This last week I was really, really. Touched by a couple of people had reached out whenever I did my episode with the sourdough starter analogy, which was last week's episode. So go back and listen to that if you didn't. It was a fun one, and several people had messaged me and told me, Hey, I love this analogy. Or, you know, one person even said, I truly love the 20 minute burst of energy that I get. Whenever you come out with a new episode, I just put it on in the morning while I'm tidying up and it's the perfect amount of time, or it's the perfect, you know, 15 to 25 minute episode for my commute or when I'm dropping my kids off at daycare. I've had a couple people say that. So it really is my goal is to get you in here, give you a couple nuggets of thought that you can bring into your own life and reflect on throughout the week, and then get you outta here so that you can get on with your day and get on with your life. So please share with others if you're able to. I would appreciate it so much. And if you don't subscribe, I am on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, all the places. Please subscribe, leave a comment, review star five star rating if you can. I would just appreciate it so much. And if not, I mean just share on social media. Tag me. I would be really, really grateful there. I will reshare it, of course, and. Yeah, so thank you so much for your support. Now, without further ado, let's get into the episode. So. This last week I was watching a movie. It's called My Oxford Year. It's based on a book, and my friend Courtney and I had this pact to read the book together because last year, one of my ins for 2025 was reading. Books that I can then watch either in a TV show or a movie. And she saw it and thought of me, and I love that. Thank you. But because I put it out there in the universe, other people were paying attention to books that are being turned, like film adapted. Film adapted. Adapted into a film or TV show, I guess you tell me how to say that. But anyway, so people were sending things my way and now it's crazy. I feel like I put it into the universe. And then now literally every book that I read or every book I ha have on my TV R is going to be made into a TV show or a movie. So I don't know about that, but it feels like some karmic energy there. Anyway, so Courtney had sent me my Oxford year and she had seen it as a upcoming movie on Netflix, and she said, Hey, I've been wanting to watch this. Just saw that there's a book about it. Maybe we could read the book together and then watch it together, or read the book and then watch the, the movie together. And I loved that idea. So we both put it on hold at the library. It was on hold for, I don't even know, 30 weeks or something crazy. And so pretty at some point we both read the book and then honestly, our lives are just. They haven't synced up long enough for us to be able to watch a two hour movie together, but we decided this last week, we'll watch it separately and then text about it or talk about it and tell each other what we thought. So this last week I watched this movie, all that to say, I watched this movie this week. And one of the main things about the main male character is that he laughs a lot. He doesn't take life too seriously. He's just very go with the flow. He kind of just takes, takes whatever life gives him, I guess. And, and to be fair, he is pretty privileged. So sometimes people who grow up and don't have to worry about money or things like that, they just have a little bit of that sense of comfortability with life. You know, try something. If you feel it's not a big deal. It's not the end of the world versus the female mind character is very serious, very planned, very organized. She kind of is a rule follower, I would say, and she's just always shocked at how. Free spirited he is and how he just doesn't worry too much about what's gonna happen in life. And I'm not gonna give any spoilers, but obviously this goes much further into the situations that they like the scenarios that they're experiencing in the life. But just watch the movie or read the book. It's really beautiful. I thought the movie was really good. I thought the book was a little bit better, but it is. Very heartbreaking. So just a heads up that it's very heartbreaking. I feel like I'm reading and watching a lot of very heartbreaking things right now. Anyway, so one of the things that he says that I love is he says, I'm of the opinion that you should never regret something, the things that you do, only the things that you didn't do. And it reminded me of how in the last few months of doing this podcast, sometimes people comment on putting myself out there because I would say, even though I think of myself as self-conscious, a lot of people think of me as just, I put myself out there, I have this podcast, or I'll put something on my story. Or back when I was in my coaching days, I was very vulnerable showing myself working out every morning and just, I don't, I, I don't worry too much about. That aspect, and that's just one bubble, right? What you put out on social media and how you feel about putting things out on social media, that's just one aspect of your life. And there are certain areas of my life where I think I'm a lot more comfortable with that, but then there are other areas where people don't see, maybe because they don't see me doing the thing Where I may not be as comfortable just moving forward on something I can't tell you. It's so silly, but I can't tell you how long it takes me to hang something on my wall or to redecorate a room or to buy something new because I get analysis paralysis of, oh, well, if I hang this on the wall, what if I don't like it? And it's like, well, then you just hang it somewhere else, or you take it down and hang something else up. But there are certain areas that we all maybe move a little bit quicker in. And then certain areas where we kind of get stuck in this analysis paralysis and we don't take any action in, and then that makes us even more stuck. And so. When I heard this quote about regretting, don't regret the things you do, regret the things that you don't do. It made me think of this. Last week I applied to be on the traders, which I am. I'm gonna be so excited when I go on you guys. I will tell you all about it, obviously if that happens, but I, whether I get it or not, I was like, oh, I'm gonna go on the traders. I shared it to my story. I'm putting myself out there, and that was something that was exciting for me and that I moved on, but a lot of people, all they saw was that I said, oh my God. I applied and I put out my story. But there were several weeks leading up to it that I had. The trader's tab, the application tab open on my phone for literally weeks because I was putting off doing, you had to submit a little video of yourself talking about why you wanna be on the traders, if you would be a trader or a faithful if you, or what would wanna be a trader or a faithful, what your game plan would be, all of that. If you guys haven't watched traders, you should watch it, but regardless. I had it on my phone for so long and I was putting it off because in this video I was thinking, oh my gosh. Well, I would want it to be really good. It would need to stand out. They would need to really like me from this video. I probably am gonna have to set aside enough time to do 50 takes because I'll wanna restart it and restart it and restart it. Or I'm, I'll wanna find the best lighting, or I'll wanna make sure that I look my best and I wanna make sure I do my hair and have the right outfit on. And, and at some point I thought, you know what? It's just not that ser serious. And this is something that I have. Come to learn. Of course, every new application you have to relearn it, right? Whenever you go through life, it's like you learn a lesson, but that lesson applies to what you're experiencing right in that moment. And then later you experiencing some, you experience something else and you kind of have to relearn the same lesson, but apply it to a different scenario. And that happened with this because years ago, like I was saying, when I was doing body. Coaching and I was into, it was a network marketing business where I was selling fitness and health programs and products, and I was, I had the first time I put myself out there. I i, it took a lot of building up to do that. It took a lot of anticipation to make the first post that, Hey, I'm a beach body coach. I want you to join me. I have loved these programs and products. It took a lot to get there, but what people just, but what people saw was just the action. And so other people saw that, oh, Morgan puts herself out there. That's easy. But really there was all of this doubt and insecurity and fear and contemplation and what should I say? And I need to have the right caption. I need the right, have the right photo, and oh, I need to take this. Spending like hours probably. Dwelling on what exactly it says, and which photo I should take, and, oh, maybe I should take out this word and put in this word, and should it be a carousel? Should it be a reel? Should it be a static photo? Honestly, I don't think reels were that big at that point, so it was definitely a static, static photo, but it could be a carousel, should I add music? All of those things. And really, if I had, if I had just told myself, Morgan, it's not that serious. It would've made it so much easier to just post that. Now again, I had to learn that lesson upfront and then reapply it, and now I've gotten comfortable with putting things out there like that on my social media, and it truly isn't that serious. I've done it so many times that it's like, oh yeah, it's not that serious. I can just put it out there. But then when it comes to a different area of life. A lot of people saw me quit my job without having something line up, and they, they're like, oh my God, that's great. And maybe you, maybe you're hearing this and thinking, oh, I could not do that. And that was like 10 months in the making. Right. I spent probably. 10 to 11 months, super unhappy in my job talking to anybody and everybody about it, applying online everywhere that I could, and it took me so long to just go ahead and go, you know what? It's not that serious if I quit my job and I can't find something within a month or however long. I don't think I set like a specific parameter around it, but I did joke with Jared that if I can't find something in the month, I'll find something part-time, or I will apply to be a front desk person at the library for like$17 an hour Or I will go try to find a barista job, whatever. I'll do something if I don't find a job, and luckily I did, but at some point I had to go, you know what is serious is being unhappy every single day in my life. What's not that serious is. Quitting my job and dedicating my time to job searching. I hope that that is resonating with you. And then with this more silly example of traders, I had all of this pressure that I was putting on myself and all these thoughts of it has to be perfect and I have to give my best, and they have to really like me and I have to be as well spoken as possible. And I I have to memorize what I'm gonna say. I can't be looking at something. At some point I went, you know what? It's a silly show and my personality will come out regardless. And if they want me, they want me. And if they don't, they don't. It's not that serious. And that is what actually led me to take some action. So sometimes there are things that we are just dwelling on. Like I always think about this one because. It is so stressful when I see media about the chemicals and blah, blah, blah, that's in our environment and how we're eating them and we're putting them in the washer with our clothes and we're, all of our cleaning products are killing us slowly, even though all we want is a clean house. And yes, that those things feel very serious. But when we are constantly bombarded with information like this in our daily lives, the reason that we don't take any action, the reason that we. The reason that we don't. Have clean, natural products in our house is because it feels like, oh, I have to do a whole sweep of the entire house, and in order to get this out, rather than being like, you know what, maybe I should just start looking at what's in my skincare first and see are there things in there that maybe aren't the best for me and I can change one, just my moisturizer, not even skincare. Maybe I can look at my moisturizer, see what the pro ingredients are, see what a natural alternative would be. And just start with my moisturizer, because I put that on my face every single day, or at least I hope you do. But start with my moisturizer. And then once you've done, because you're like, it's not that serious, it's just moisturizer. Okay, I'm looking at my moisturizer, I change it. And you do that for four or six months or whatever, and then you move on to your mascara or you move on to your hand lotion, or you move on to your dish detergent or laundry detergent or whatever. Helping yourself realize that each individual decision really is not that serious is going to help you in the long run. Because when we feel like, oh my God, there, there's so much pressure, I have to figure all these things out before I can move forward, and it's every single decision feels so serious, then you never take any action. Rather than being like, okay, it's not that serious, let's just do one thing. Let's just focus on one thing, and then you focus on that one thing, and then before you know it, you've applied to the traders or before you know it, you found a new job or before you know it, your house is full of clean products I truly hope that this is just a good reminder that life is not that serious. Taking yourself so seriously is not helping you. It is hurting you because it is. Back to that quote from the movie, it is creating things in your life that you'll regret not ever getting to, not ever doing, because you were so focused on making sure that things that you were doing were perfect. And I don't know who said it first, but I always think about the quote that perfect is the enemy of good. And when we are so focused on doing things perfectly, first of all, that's. Irrational standard. No one is perfect. Nothing is ever going to be perfect. So when we focus on doing things perfectly, we actually have no standards for ourselves because that is not a realistic standard. So the next time that you are overthinking, saying hi to someone, whether it's a stranger or some person in Target that you haven't seen for 10 years or. Whoever it is, you're overthinking whether to say hi to someone or you're overthinking sourdough. I talked about sourdough last week, but when I first got my sourdough starter, I was like, oh my God, talking to G Chat, GPT, and like, did I fuck this up? Oh, so sorry if you have little ears in the car, but did I have this up and am I already screwing it up? And da, da da. And it turns out sourdough is very resilient, so we're fine. But it's just not that serious. Right? The next time that you are overthinking, uh, starting a new hobby or trying something new or saying hi to someone, or starting a new job or posting something on social media or just anything, just ask yourself, is it that serious? The answer is probably no, and if you've been thinking and dwelling on this for a long time, you probably are more likely to regret not doing it or saying it or whatever it is, than doing it. So I keep telling you to ask yourself, is it that serious? And the answer's probably no. Another thing that you can ask yourself is, will this matter in five years? Most things will not matter in five years. Most things that we're doing today will not matter in five years. We won't be dwelling on it in five years. The choices that we're making today, yes, they do build up to the life that we create and the people that we are. But a little choice like posting on social media will probably not matter in five years. Or if you are really struggling with the decision of whether to leave your job and take a new job opportunity. I had someone in my life that this happened recently where they had a great opportunity, but they're really, really stressed about the job that they're leaving and they feel really a lot of guilt and shame about leaving them. But it is a better opportunity. Will this matter in five years? Like in five years will you be thinking, oh, I really, really, I still feel really guilty about that previous job? Probably not. You'll probably be happy go lucky, woo woo and your new good opportunity job that you're in and not even thinking about the past job. And or if you are, you'll probably be thinking, wow, I'm so glad that I left there. Or the silly traders example, like me putting all of the effort into traders. What? Whatever, like that's not gonna matter in five years, me sitting here dwelling, overthinking traders, this opportunity is now the opportunity. There is a deadline for when you can be done with this. So in five years that casting whatever, it's not gonna matter if I sat there and I overthought it and I never did anything about it. Right? So ask yourself about the timeline of this. Like is this something that is gonna matter in five years? Honestly, it's probably not even gonna matter in like a month or a year, especially five years. And the reason that I want to implore you to start thinking about this and start taking your life a little less seriously is because when you loosen up that tight fist, tight grip, if you're watching on YouTube, you can see I'm like holding my fist in a tight, you, you know, you're holding your fist really tight because you're thinking about all of these things that you're stressed about and that are so serious, and when you loosen that grip, you'll find that you feel more freedom and you feel lighter, and you feel like you can fully enjoy your life and you, and you're honestly probably more interesting because you're taking things less seriously. And so you're trying more things and you're actually living life and you're also getting answers, you're getting clarity quicker. I think that this is one thing about when we, when we take things less seriously, we try more things. And when you try pickleball, let's say you, you're like, okay, I'm gonna take a pickleball. You trying, pickleball is gonna give, give you way more clarity and, and the insight on whether or not you like that sport. You might, you might be telling yourself for five years, oh, I really should get into pickleball. I really should get into pickleball. Well, until you actually pick up a. Racket. Is it a racket? I don't know. A racket in a pickleball, and you actually start playing. You're not gonna know if you actually like it. What if you picked up the racket in pickleball? Guys, are these the right terms? What if you picked them up it five years ago when you first said, oh, I really should get into pickleball? And you picked it up and you started playing and you were like, actually, I don't like this. I think that I would rather. Play soccer or volleyball or whatever it is, you know, you might not actually like it, and you spent all of that time wasting thoughts and energy about how oh, I really should get into pickleball, when really there were other things waiting for you that would fill your life more. I think it brings so much clarity. Another example is with the house things, right? Maybe you're changing something in your house and you think for so long, oh, I really, really need to get some decor for this room, or I feel like people, including myself, put off painting a room because they're not sure if they, what shade they like the best. And dude, it is just not that deep. Right. You know, you won't know until you start painting a room if you like the color or not genuinely. You just probably won't. I know that that can be a lot of effort, a lot of output, but you might start painting a room and then realize that the color that you picked you don't like, but you're never gonna know that until you start painting the room. It's just not that serious. It's just not that deep. Just when we release the seriousness of life, I think that we try more things. We recover from mistakes faster because we're probably making more little mistakes along the way. Right? But those are just giving us clarity on what's next. We feel lighter, we feel freer. Our life is more interesting. So all this to say in this episode, I know I kind of got on my soapbox here, but life is fun. We. Do not know how many days we get here and we deserve to live every single one of them in the most fun, freeing, life-giving way that we possibly can. And so this week I just want you to go through your week and ask yourself, is it that serious? Is it that deep? Will this matter in five years? Give yourself permission to be bad at things. Give yourself permission to mess up. Give yourself permission to be a beginner in something. It is not that deep. And if you're worried about what other people are thinking of you, most of the time they're too busy thinking about themselves to be thinking about you anyway. If they are thinking about you, dude, that's on them. That's their issue, not yours. You can only can control what you can control, so go control your life, make it messy, make it fun, make it enjoyable. I love you. Thank you.