The Win On Purpose Podcast

Metamorphosis: Beyond Change

• Adam Kelley • Episode 33

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What's the fundamental difference between people who make temporary progress and those who achieve lasting transformation? It's not about trying harder—it's about becoming someone entirely new.

Most of us approach personal growth backward. We focus on changing behaviors while keeping the same identity, creating an exhausting internal battle that eventually leads back to square one. The hard truth? If your current self could achieve and maintain the results you want, you'd already have them.

This episode reveals the profound shift required for genuine transformation. Rather than identifying as "an unhealthy person trying to lose weight," you must become "a healthy, active person who naturally makes supportive choices." This identity-first approach changes everything about your journey.

You'll discover why even successful weight loss stories often end with regression, how to fundamentally reimagine who you are, and why this metamorphosis—though challenging—delivers exponential returns on your investment. The process isn't linear and requires patience as you develop through stages, much like growing from infancy to adulthood in your new identity.

Whether your goals involve health, career, relationships, or personal growth, this principle remains constant: you cannot bring your old self into your new future and expect different outcomes. Are you ready to stop the cycle of temporary change and commit to becoming someone new who naturally achieves what once seemed impossible?

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Win On Purpose podcast. Thank you guys for tuning in today. Today's episode is a straight talk episode, so I'm going to explain to you the biggest secret, the biggest thing, the biggest changeosis that must happen from who we are now or who we used to be when we started our journey, and to the person that we want to be, because we cannot take our old self into our new future and expect different outcomes. So I open up with you guys on a personal journey that I've learned from and experienced throughout my time of my transformation, and I hope that it helps you guys and I know that it will because if you change who you are, you can become whatever you wanna be and do the things you wanna do. So, as always, enjoy the episode and we will see you on the other side.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to the Win On Purpose podcast From health and fitness, business, personal development, relationships and more. We promise you will find inspiration to help you win on purpose in all areas of your life journey. Now for your host, adam Kelly.

Speaker 1:

What's up, guys? Welcome back to the Win On Purpose podcast. So today's episode is going to be a little bit different. This is going to be a straight talk to you guys. All right, I want to break into some mentalities that we need to change, some perspectives we need to alter so that we stop holding ourselves back and stop being the main reason why we aren't where we want to be in our health, in our body and in our lives.

Speaker 1:

Okay, because this topic will literally, you know, impact every part of your life, not just your health journey. And that's what most, you know, most of our episodes are about is when we realize just how all aspects of our life are connected, then we can really start to see change. So, not just compartmentalizing our life into this is what I do for my health, this is what I our life into. This is what I do for my health, this is what I do for work, this is what I do for my family, and realizing that all of those tie into each other, all of those have an effect on the next, then we can really figure out what we need to do so we can become who we wanna be. Okay, so this episode is about becoming something, not just doing something, not just doing something, not just doing things, but becoming something, becoming someone. And this is literally the biggest game changer when it comes to building a life of health and of wealth and of longevity and all things that you want to do is realizing that it's going to require more of you. It's going to require a new person, because the simple fact is that we have to accept if who we are now could accomplish what we want to accomplish, we would already be there. We would just wake up and do it and manifest it and it would happen. But we don't see that. Rather, if that's with a health goal, you know, a physique goal, a work career goal, whatever it may be, family goal, whatever it may be, that you want to achieve, that you want to be better at, if you continued on as you are, who you are, you're not going to see that change happen, and we have to accept that, because this is the main thing that is holding us back from all the things that we want in this life.

Speaker 1:

All right, so, as always, you know this is focused primarily on health and fitness, but, like I said, this can be applied to every part of your life, because if you do what I'm going to tell you to do in this episode, it's going to change every part of your life and you're going to see a true metamorphosis, a true transformation into something different. And that's what is going to be required of you to live the life that you want to live, Okay? And so, at the end of the day, you cannot take your old self into your new future. All right, that's what I'm, that's what I'm getting at with that. That's what I'm trying to sum up you cannot take your old self into your new future. You have to become something new. So if you'll, if you're just repeating your past, or you'll just be repeating your past if you don't change now for the future, okay. So we have past, present and future. You're just going to repeat your past If you don't change your now for your future, all right. So this is a self development, self growth type of episode. So if you don't like that, this one may not be for you, but I promise you there's something that you can take from this conversation.

Speaker 1:

So, like I said, you know it's it's understanding that we cannot be who we've always been and expect a different outcome. You know, if we're only creating a better version of ourselves, then that will make us just basically suck less at what we're wanting to be better at, all right. So you know, we it's very cliche, it's very catchy to say things like you know, I'm going to be the best version of myself or a better version of myself, and I use that as well, and I use it with my clients. You know, one of my favorite phrases is better than yesterday. So kind of that same idea of taking who we are now and just making it better.

Speaker 1:

But when you really think about that, guys, when you really break that down, if you're just becoming a better version of yourself who sucks at what you're trying to accomplish, because, let's face it, if you're not at your health goal, if you're not at your financial goal, if you're not at your career goal, then most likely you're not as good as you need to be to be able to do that. You know you haven't made the sacrifices and commitment to change your health. You haven't, you know, increased your education and you know, did the networking and put yourself in the open doors in order to advance your career and therefore make more money. So you know, just trying to better ourself, we're just going to suck less at what we want to be better at, but that's not solving the problem, right? Like if I'm just trying to create a better version of myself with my health, then I'm just going to be less unhealthy at the end of the day. But am I really going to be at peak health that I could be at? Probably not. I may just be less unhealthy and that can be great right there. But I think almost all of us don't want to settle for that. All right, we want to go beyond just sucking less, right?

Speaker 1:

So you know, developing a new identity will help us become what's required to fulfill that desire for the rest of our lives. Okay, again, this is about becoming something, someone that's new and you know again with your, with your old self or who, maybe who you are now. Maybe you haven't started making any changes and you haven't started developing your character, and you know changing your habits and things like that. So we're dealing with who you are now. You can try to force yourself and will yourself to do something all day. Do something all day. But you know, developing that new identity makes you become someone new and that's going to help you actually make a change for life, not just for the temporary, but actually for the rest of your life. And just trying to will yourself to do things, to improve your health, for example, may come with short term success. You know, you may have some benefit, you may have some good results in the immediate or in the shorter term, but that rarely leads to long-term behavior change.

Speaker 1:

So if we're talking about longevity, if we're talking about not just the next 10 days, 10 weeks, but we're talking about the next 10 years, you know, the rest of our lives. That's where our focus should be, you know, because we're not getting any younger, our kids aren't getting younger and life is evolving and changing around us, and if we're not evolving and changing with it, then we're going to be left behind and living a life that is subpar to what we want for ourselves. So only changing behavior will lead. Ok, guys. So let me just say this so I did jot down some notes for this topic, you know, as I was just kind of thinking of how I wanted to communicate this idea, you know I wanted to put it on paper. So I'm just kind of shooting off some of these points that I wrote down and then I'm going to fill in with you. Know more context and detail behind it. Okay, just so you understand why it sounds like I'm going to fill in with you. Know more context and detail behind it. Okay, just so. So you understand why it sounds like I'm going from reading to just talking. That's why.

Speaker 1:

So, only changing behavior will lead to complacency, for the most part, once you make it so far. Okay. So, for example, your goal is to lose weight and you want to lose body fat, and so you start changing your behavior. You start going to the gym, you start not eating fast food, you start making better health choices, things like that, and that's all that you do. You're just addressing your actions, but you're not addressing who you are.

Speaker 1:

Then, whenever you get to a place one either you reach a goal or you start to see yourself getting close to there. So you start to see those results coming. You start to see your body changing, your clothes are fitting differently, things are moving in the right direction. Then it gets very easy to become complacent when you get there and say, oh, it's okay if I do this because I've come this far. It's okay if I do this because I've come this far. It's okay if I do this because I've been this dedicated and we start to justify things that are counterproductive to where we want to be. So you know, if your identity is still anchored in who you are now, then you will resort back to being that person at some point.

Speaker 1:

Okay, once that complacency happens, then we start slipping back into those old habits and actions that got us to that bad place that we were in to begin with. Because, again, we haven't got to the root issue. We're masking it, we're putting band-aids on it by just addressing our lifestyle habits and our actions and things like that, but we're not truly healing the problem, we're not truly solving the problem. So eventually and I've rarely ever not seen this happen you're going to resort back to that person that you have always been. At the end of the day. So if we don't change who we are, it doesn't matter what we do, it doesn't matter what actions we commit to, it doesn't matter how consistent we are. We will go back to old habits. Guys, I've done it myself, I've seen it a thousand times we will go back to our old habits.

Speaker 1:

So we have to understand that. You know, in life, change happens constantly. It's always going to be changing around us, circumstances are going to be changing, our goals are going to change, our dreams are going to change. Our desires, our preferences, all those things change with the different seasons, with the different points of life that we're in, but who we are will stay consistent through all of that change. So who we are, even if we're masking it, like I said, we're putting band-aids on it by just changing our habits and doing different things, eventually what we're even doing those things for is going to change.

Speaker 1:

If you get to your goal and this is the most practical example I can give you when someone has a life transformation and they lose 50 pounds, they lose 100 pounds, something crazy and it literally changes every aspect of their life. And they did that just through pure will and force and grit and willpower and grind, but they never addressed who they are as a person. Then, when they get to their goal and they accomplish it, you know they won. At the end of the day, we say, oh, they won. Okay, this is great and it is great. But what I'm getting at is that's not the victory. Okay, that is getting to the mountain. All right, that's getting to the mountain. All right, that's getting to the base of the mountain. Now you have to actually climb that mountain, and climbing that mountain is the rest of your life and maintaining these results or improving upon these results as you go along. Okay.

Speaker 1:

So when our goal changes, if our actions and our habits are only attached to that goal specifically and it's not just who we are as a person then we're going to drop those actions and those things we were doing to get to that goal, because we're no longer striving for that goal, in which we backtrack and we backslide and we go back to those old habits and then we gain all that weight back or we lose all that muscle, we lose all that fitness, we lose that cardiovascular health and we go back to who we were and, in most cases, worse, because we really have now fueled that self that we should have been changing the entire time, because now we've been repressing that person for so long. As soon as they get a taste of what they like, it's on and popping guys, and I've rarely ever seen it not lead to people going right back to where they were and even worse than that. So you know this. How we change this? What do we do with this right? How do we change this? How do we? How do we improve this? How do we become a new person? What does that look like?

Speaker 1:

Practically, cause, it's easy to say that, like hey, you got to become new. But what does that mean? What does that sound like? Well, here's an example for you. It's switching your mentality, switching the typical mentality of I'm a fat, unhealthy, average gym and working out and eating healthy to lose 50 pounds so I can feel better and I can look better. Okay, that sounds perfect, like that's a solid goal. You can timeline that out and accomplish it and everything's fine.

Speaker 1:

But notice how we have an identity that's identified and then we have actions that are being implied, that are being done, okay, but that identity is always going to end up dictating our actions at some point, rather, if that's never making it to where we want to go, or making it there and then going back. So we change that mentality of identifying as this person we don't want to go, or making it there and then going back. So we change that mentality of identifying as this person we don't want to be, who's just doing things for a desired outcome, and we change that, we transform that into I am a healthy, active person. Now, guys, you have cracked the code to long-term success. You see what I did there.

Speaker 1:

I'm no longer this negative image who's doing these things to become better, but now I am this type of person, right? So, basically, what you're doing at the end of the day is you're flipping the script. You're no longer forcing who you are to do things that you don't wanna do. You're no longer forcing who you are to do things that you don't want to do. You're now doing the things you want to do because it's who you are. I'm going to repeat that for you. You're no longer forcing who you are to do things you don't want to do. You're now doing the things you want to do because it's who you are. You want to eat healthy because you're a healthy person. You want to be active and exercise because you're an active person. You want to get quality sleep because you are a responsible person who is making sure they're recovering from their activity to get the most out of it. This is now who you become.

Speaker 1:

Real quick, guys, if you're enjoying this episode and you like what you're hearing and this is helpful to you, if you don't mind, just real quick hitting the like button, give us a share, send it to someone that you know. Give us five stars, leave some comments. All of this engagement lets us know what type of content helps our listeners the most and how we can be the most beneficial. So, guys, help us out there. Help us get this good, sound, practical information out there to the masses to help transform more lives and create people who become who they want to become. Thanks, guys. Back to the episode.

Speaker 1:

So, with that being said, as you become that new person that doesn't mean magically you're only going to want to just be active and eat healthy and you're never going to have cravings. You're never going to have weak points. You're never going to have days where you want to be lazy and kick back and do nothing, or you're sore and tired and don't feel like it, or you're short on time and the inconvenience of meal prepping or whatever it may be, finding the healthy food you don't feel like doing it. I'm not saying that this is going to magically cure all that, because that's a lie. I would be gassing you up. That's not what it is. All right.

Speaker 1:

We don't always want to do healthy things, even after it's who we've become, just like you didn't always want to overeat and be in pain for being overweight and too sedentary.

Speaker 1:

Right, you didn't always want to do that, but you still did those things. You still overate, you still were in pain because you were overweight, you still were sedentary, knowing that you needed to be active because that's who you were. So, even in that scenario, you still did things you didn't really want to do and you knew that you should do differently, but you still did it because that's who you are. So, when you become this new person, this healthy person, this active person, there's going to be times where you don't want to do those things. Right, absolutely Everybody goes through that. It's a day by day thing, but you're still going to do it because that's who you are. You're going to be able to fall back on your, your becoming and that's what's going to keep you driving forward to those days that you actually want to do it.

Speaker 1:

So we have to grasp the fact that we have to become this new person and, like I said, you're not always going to want to do the things, but you're going to fall back on who you are, not your habits again, because your habits. You're changing your habits within this process, so you could easily fall back on poor habits that you haven't done in five years. But just because you're at that weak point and you still haven't transformed who you are, you end up five years later relapsing and going back to those things. Like I said, you can apply this to anything, but when you change who you are now, you fall back on the default of you know what. Yeah, I don't feel like eating healthy, but I am a healthy eating person, so I'm going to do it anyways. I don't feel like being active today, but I'm an active person, so I'm going to be active anyways, because this is who I am.

Speaker 1:

You see what that's doing there. You see how much that's empowering you. You see how much self-efficacy that's building and knowing that you can do better. Because who you are now does better. Naturally, because who they are versus who you were, try to force themselves to do better because that's what they wanted to be. But they didn't realize they were wanting to be someone new. They thought they were just wanting to keep who they were and take it into this new environment.

Speaker 1:

But it doesn't work that way. You can't take who you were and just will that hard enough to be consistent with your diet and with your exercise and your sleep and all of that. That's going to get very old, you're going to get burnt out and you're going to give up, and we don't want that for you, right? So when you transform who you were into who you desire to be, your actions will naturally and obviously with some effort, align with who you are becoming. Okay, it's just, that's the way it works, all right, you, just you naturally just start doing these things because you realize this is the type of person you are. So you see how freeing that is, because that doesn't attach you to a goal. That's not like oh, I'm going to do these things because I want this outcome, so tomorrow I may not to do these things because I want this outcome, so tomorrow I may not want that outcome as much. I'm not as passionate about achieving that. So now I can be less consistent with everything else because I'm just relying on my motivation at the end of the day, of being somewhere rather than becoming someone, and then those things naturally follow.

Speaker 1:

So eventually, the results that you are after have to come and, mind you, much easier, they have to come to you as a mere byproduct of who you become as a person. The results that you are after have to come to you, and it will be easier than if you try to will yourself as a mere byproduct of who you've become as a person. Does that not sound like something we're all after, something we all desire To just wake up and want to be healthy, want to be active, want to eat better, want to get better sleep, want to work on our stress management, want to take good care of our bodies? Think about that. What is it that you want, ask yourself at the end of the day? Because I can promise you this, because I can promise you this in almost all situations if you don't truly want to become somebody different, you are not going to reach slash. Keep your goals. You may get there, but it's going to be very short term.

Speaker 1:

And if you talk to anyone who has made a life transformation, a health transformation, they may not even think this way, like they become a new person and they went through this self-growth and this self-rebirth process. Unless they're working with a coach who focuses on this type of stuff, they may not even think that way. But I can promise you, if you sit down with them and start talking to them and start looking at their life before their transformation, even at the beginning and middle of the transformation versus the end. And after that, if they've been able to maintain that change, you're going to see everything that I'm saying right there in front of you. They're going to express everything that I'm saying in their own words because they're going to tell you yeah, like I don't do the same things I used to do, I don't live the same way, I don't think the same way, I don't have the same habits, I don't go to the same places, I may not even hang with the same people.

Speaker 1:

You know they've literally created a whole new life, even if they don't realize that. They did because they have to, because there's no way you're going to sustain that. There's no way they're going to sustain that change. Their body is going to fight against them at every corner. And if you don't realize that, regardless of how I feel, regardless of what my body's doing, regardless of you know physiologically what's happening to try to make me gain weight back, it doesn't matter, because I'm not the same person who gained that weight and held that weight. I'm not the same person that was sedentary. So, even if things are hard to keep those results because we know that, that's true, like maintaining is way harder than losing or gaining, okay, but even with that being said, knowing that it's harder on us because that's just who we are, it doesn't matter, like, yeah, it's a thing, but it doesn't matter. We're still going to get up and go work out. We're still going to get our steps in, or whatever our physical activity looks like. We're still going to get our protein, our healthy food in. We're still going to focus on our sleep. We're still going to do these things regardless, even if it may be a little bit harder because we made a transformation.

Speaker 1:

So I want you to really see how important this topic is. That's what I'm being very passionate about right now. I'm not trying to be dramatic with my speech and things like that. I'm just. This is literally the root of why I do what I do. This is literally the only thing that saved my life, guys, my health, remember. Your boy may be a coach, but I'm talking what I've walked. Okay, I talk what I walk what I've walked. I talk what I walk. I've made 100 plus pound transformations more than once, meaning I've gone there and I've gone back more than once. So I'm speaking from a very, very, a very personal place here, and this is literally the answer to solve your problem.

Speaker 1:

But understand, although I make it sound very simple, it is very simple, but it is not going to be easy. Change alone is extremely hard. We all know that we're resistant to change as creatures. Change is hard, especially long-term change, and we're talking about something that's so beyond change. We're talking about metamorphosis. We're talking about transformation. That's not the same thing as change. We're talking about metamorphosis, we're talking about transformation. That's not the same thing as change. And we have to understand what transforming actually means. Transforming is not doing things differently.

Speaker 1:

Transforming is becoming something new, and this is what I'm going to dial. I'm going to dial on this hill of telling people who you were cannot go into your future. If you want a different outcome, you can stay who you are for the rest of your life. If you want to, that's totally up to you and I'm all for it. If you're happy with who you are and how you are, then you just wasted your time even listening to this, but maybe not, because there may be still something here for you. But if you're not happy with who you are, if you're not happy with the way you look, the way you feel, the way you move. If you're not happy with who you are as a spouse, as a son, daughter, as a friend, as an employee, as an employer, if you're not happy with your financial situation, if you're not happy with your career situation, if you're not happy with your financial situation, if you're not happy with your career situation, you're going to have to become new.

Speaker 1:

If you are trying to get into a new career that's like your actual passion and you're tired of the nine to five just trying to make a paycheck and you want to do what you're passionate about, you cannot be the person who did that nine to five job just to make money and try to carry that into being a business owner and an entrepreneur. That's not going to work that way. This is something I've had to learn personally, because my whole life I've been blue collar. I've been the guy that just hey, I don't. I don't like to think, I just like to do so. Give me a job, tell me what to do, show me how to do it right, based on your expectations, and I'm going to do it the best you could possibly ask for it, consistently.

Speaker 1:

That's a blue collar mentality. That's a nine to fiver mentality. I'm going to show up, I'm going to do a good job because that's my standard, I'm going to make my paycheck, I'm going to clock out and I'm going to go live my life until I got to do this again, that person is not going to be successful at owning a business. There's no possible way because it's too contrasting. You can't just make yourself work more when you have that nine to five mentality. You may work more, but it's going to be so hard and such a grind you're not going to last. You can make yourself not check out as early, but you're still going to clock out at a certain time and be done mentally and stop doing the things that are required of you outside of just the normal task in order to grow your business. So, like I said, this can be applied anywhere.

Speaker 1:

If you're trying to go from a nine to five employee to starting your own business, I promise you it's way harder than you think it's going to be, it's way more stressful than you think it's going to be. And every time you turn around you're going to be facing the thought of am I actually succeeding or am I failing slowly? And if you try to still be that nine to five employee who only wants to do the job they're being paid for, only wants to, you know, immediately be rewarded for their efforts through pay and not realize that owning a business, being an entrepreneur, is a 24 hour thing, like it's constant. You're either thinking about it or you're doing it, or you're making it happen. You're working in your business or on your business. There's always something that you have to do and you're always going to be the one to do the absolute most than everybody around you.

Speaker 1:

That comes with the territory, and that type of person, that type of thinking, is not going to be successful in this new area of life, this new life. You went from an employee to a business owner. You have a whole new life now. That's going to look completely different. You cannot try to mimic your life of a nine to fiver in all aspects of your life outside of work as well your schedule, your hobbies, your what you do, how you do things. You're not going to be able to take that and carry that with you into this new position of a business owner. It's not going to work out. You're going to fail because you're not going to do enough, because you have a limited mentality. So at the end of the day.

Speaker 1:

Guys, what I want to leave you with on this is count the cost when you want to be better, because being better is going to require more than just changing your actions. It's going to require you giving up things, it's going to require you making sacrifices, it's going to require you not doing certain things anymore and starting to do certain things all the time. And if you don't start taking on that identity, that is extremely exhausting. When you're forcing yourself to do something that you don't want to do at the root of who you are because it's not who you are that is so exhausting and you end up wasting a lot of time and effort and money and everything else by what you're putting into that process, just to end up giving it up or going backwards. So I want to see you transform your health and your life in all aspects for the rest of your life and always be getting better. That's what I want for myself.

Speaker 1:

That's the standard I'm holding myself to as I'm growing into this, because you know, it's kind of like real, real life, all right. Like when babies are born OK, we have a new human, we have a new person on the earth. Like this is a miracle, it's amazing, it's brand new, it's rebirth, but it's not that great. Like, uh, that little baby can't do nothing, he can't feed himself, he can't change himself, he can't go to the bathroom, he can't walk, he can't talk, he can't hold his head up, he can't roll over on his own, he can't do anything for himself. And that's the same way your transformation is going to happen. This is why people quit and give up when they're working towards transforming themselves into this new person, the person that they want to be. They end up giving up because they're like, wow, I'm doing these things and I'm changing my mentality, but this is hard. Like I can't keep this up.

Speaker 1:

And you're right, if you try to stay a baby, you're not going to be able to do grown up things. If you're trying to stay a baby, you got to understand. You got to start somewhere. You got to start from the bottom, ok, and work your way up. So this is an overnight thing. You're not, you can't just will yourself again. And then tonight, in your thoughts, in your meditation of tomorrow, I'm going to be a brand new person. Then you wake up and just wah, brand new, and everything's just perfect and you're just doing all the things that are required to be where you want to be effortlessly, because you're this new person. That's dream world Again.

Speaker 1:

I'm not going to sell you a lie, guys. It's going to be hard. It's going to sell you a lie, guys. It's going to be hard. It's going to take time. You're going to bump your head a lot. You're going to go back and forth. You're going to change who you think you want to be as you start to embark on this journey and continue on and see what's practical, realistic versus what's not. That just comes with it, guys. That's part of being the baby and you got to go into the bigger baby, and then the toddler, and then the adolescence, and then the teenager, adulthood, elderly.

Speaker 1:

You got to go through the process, guys. Don't think this is going to be easy, but it is so worth it. Every single second, every single sacrifice, every single moment that you are creating this new person is going to be worth it. I don't care how hard it is, I don't care what's required of you, what it takes of you to do this. It will pay dividends. It will multiply your ROI Way beyond your expectations. 10 times, 100 times. Your return on investment is going to be so much higher, because not only are you going to achieve any goal you set for yourself, but you're going to maintain that and you're going to keep winning because you're a winner.

Speaker 1:

Again, I'm not a person who wins, I'm a winner. Sounds corny, guys, but this is for real. Like it's that much, it's that easy, it's that simple of a switch. I'm not a person who wins, I'm a winner. Okay, be a winner, guys, for yourself. No-transcript. So I'm going to leave you with that, guys, and whatever you do with this information, make sure you do something good for yourself, something good for your health, something good for those you care about and whatever you do, make sure you win on purpose. Talk to you next time.