69. Being Present Is The Biggest Win (Live The Now)

A deadline can light a fire, but it can also burn you out. We dig into the mindset that keeps people stuck in the start stop cycle of weight loss and fitness goals, then we flip it with one simple phrase: live the now. Being present changes everything, because it stops you from treating health like a short project and starts turning it into sustainable habits you can actually keep. 

We talk about why focusing only on an end date can sabotage consistency when life gets messy, and why the “middle” of the journey is where the real transformation happens. The workouts, the daily steps, the sleep routine, the nutrition choices, and the quiet moments of self-control are not just tasks to suffer through; they are character development. That character is what helps you maintain fat loss, build strength, and create a lifestyle you do not have to restart every few months. 

You’ll also hear a real story from my own life: exhausted at the end of a long day, already turning on the shower, then realizing I’m 3,000 steps short and having to choose discipline over comfort. It’s a small moment with a big lesson, plus practical ways to reframe meal prep, setbacks, and “off” days so they become progress instead of proof you’re failing. If this helped you, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs consistency, and leave a quick review so more people can find the show.

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Transcript

Welcome And What Changes Today

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Welcome to Live Transformed, the podcast from Transformed Health Initiative, where evidence-based truth meets real life transformation. Lead yourself, integrate health, value what matters, engage in the process. This is how you live transformed. And now here's your host, Adam Kelly.

SPEAKER_02 0:25

What is going on, everybody? Welcome back to the Live Transform Podcast. I'm your host, Adam Kelly, or Coach AK, as those around here may know me as. I appreciate you guys for taking the time to tune into another episode. So on this one, it's going to be a little bit different than my last one. Last one, I gave some tips and some pointers. This one is more about perspective and mindset, specifically when it comes to our health and fitness transformation goals and just our life transformation goals in general. So this one's gonna be a little bit different, kind of like a rant, just discussion style. So hopefully you're able to get something out of this no matter where you are in your health journey, or you're able to pass it on to somebody else who may be struggling, especially with the consistency aspect, especially with the starting and stopping and the yo-yo and just the back and forth. And you can actually help them with this message by sending it to them. So I would highly appreciate it if you share this with somebody that you care about, somebody that you know is on their own health journey that would definitely help us climb up the algorithm and you know just get more exposure because the more people we reach, the more people we help. And that is the whole purpose of this podcast, which is why you don't hear any ads or commercials or anything like that, other than the one of my own, because again, this is all about giving back, helping others, and just giving you a voice of reason and direction in the midst of all the noise out there. So

Live The Now Explained

SPEAKER_02 1:55

today I want to talk about mindset and specifically the idea of embracing the journey and living the now. Okay. I actually have it tattooed on my forearm. I have one on each. One says do the work, and the other one says live the now. Okay. So live the now. What does that mean? Obviously, it's pretty easy to tell where I'm going with that. Live the now means just being present, okay? It means being where you are when you're there, not just looking past and skipping all the details and just going on autopilot and just mustering your way through, but actually being present in your life. And this is very important, obviously, for all aspects of life business, family, whatever it may be. But I want to show you how this applies to our health journey and our fitness journey and just our bettering ourselves, self, self-help, self-development journey. Okay. So when most people set a goal that they want to accomplish, they want to lose weight, they want to build muscle, they want to burn fat, they want to be more athletic, they want to be more flexible, whatever it may be, they usually have an end goal in mind, right? And there's nothing wrong with that. Okay. There's usually like, hey, by next summer, I want X, Y, and Z, or by you know, this summer, or by the winter, or by my birthday, or by my vacation time, or by my wedding, or whatever it may be. Usually people have kind of an in end

Goals Versus A Lifelong Lifestyle

SPEAKER_02 3:28

point when they think of their goals, okay? And this can become a negative thing when we apply that same idea to our health in general. So, what I mean by that is a lot of people, they're like, hey, I know I need to do better, I know I need to eat better, I know I need to move more, I know I need to strength train so I can build muscle, I know I need to get better sleep, I know I need to do all these things. And we obviously need to do these things for the rest of our life if we want to maintain and sustain those benefits, but we tend to look at our health journey as a whole in little micro pieces, like we do our specific health goals. So, again, I want to lose 30 pounds by next year, versus I want to be healthier, as healthy as I can be for the rest of my life. Okay. One of them is a short-term goal, one of them is a long-term lifelong mission or journey, but it's not a goal. Okay, it's not a goal to be your healthiest self or take better care of your health for the rest of your life. That's a lifestyle. But we often look at that like we do our short-term goals, like, hey, there needs to be an end. Okay, at some point, I'm not gonna have to work out, at some point, I'm not gonna have to, you know, keep my steps up. At some point, I'm not gonna have to focus on getting good sleep and going to sleep at a good time and waking up consistently. And right there, number one, we have a big problem. But even when it comes to our short-term goals and our short-term endeavors, we miss so much when all we do is just focus on where we want to be or focus on that end point. So,

Why Deadlines Can Backfire

SPEAKER_02 5:21

working with bodybuilders, for example, we set a show date, right? It's like, okay, next fall, this fall, next spring, whatever, we want to get on stage. Okay. So then we reverse engineer the process, figure out where we're at versus where we need to be by this specific end time, and then we map out what we need to do in between those two points to get to that final outcome, because all the work that's done within that, you know, 12 week, 16 week, 24 week, however long the prep needs to be, all the work that's done within that time is only for that specific outcome. Okay, that whole dieting phase, that whole suffering phase is all about reaching this end deadline. Okay. And so it's very easy to get super hyper focused on that end date because a lot of times that's what keeps athletes driven to keep going and to keep dieting and to keep doing the cardio and to keep showing up for the workouts and to keep you know being disciplined in their lifestyle when they want to do the exact opposite most of the time. Okay. But that same mentality cannot, or let me rephrase that, should not apply to our actual health journey. So even if we have an end goal of, again, I want to lose 30 pounds by next year. If all we're doing that whole time is just focusing on that end goal, number one, we could be making some mistakes that push that date further back than we realize. Or life may happen, circumstances may come up that has to make that date shift. So if we're not on track for that actual date, that's very easy to throw people off because they're like, oh, well, there's no way I'm gonna lose this 30 pounds by next year because now we're you know in October, November, and I'm only 10 pounds in because I fluctuated back and forth. So now it's 20 pounds to lose in the next two, three months when the first, you know, eight, uh, nine months of the year, I have only managed to lose 10

The Process Builds The Person

SPEAKER_02 7:36

pounds. So that's you know a big problem that can come from that. But also, I feel like we do ourselves a disjustice or injustice when we only focus on the end game and we don't actually take the time to be present in the journey, in the process, because the journey in the process is what develops the character that's gonna help you stay at that endpoint when you get to that endpoint. Okay, the process, the growth that happens, the things that you learn about yourself when you don't want to do what you need to do, but you do it anyways because you desire that goal to become a reality. The character that you develop when you say no to things you would rather say yes to, because it goes against that end-term goal. There's so much character, there's so much on the table that we can grasp and benefit from for the rest of our lives from this one 12-month period of dieting. Okay, and so many times, so much of that is missed because we're so hyper-focused on getting to that endpoint, being done with the diet, being done with the training, and just finally being able to live in this body that we've desired for so long. But if our character, if the essence of who we are is not being developed in the process of getting to that end goal, even if we do get to that end goal, the chances of us keeping those results is not very good because we are likely still the same person that we were before we got there, before we started the journey. We just did some different actions for however much time it took to get to this point. But we could very well be missing out on the development of who we are as a person that we experience on this journey. And this is one of the most beautiful things about health transformations is not the fact that somebody can fit smaller clothes or they can move more or they have more energy or they've undone some health conditions that was caused by their lifestyle by getting healthier. Although those are fantastic things, we can still miss the big picture. We can miss the discipline that's developed, the self-control that's developed, really learning ourselves and having to face ourselves every day and tell ourselves no. I mean, a lot of us we're self-spoiled, right? Like we're so used to telling ourselves yes all the time, whenever we want something. Some of us really aren't very good at telling ourselves no. And that's a very powerful ability to have and to um develop is the ability to tell ourselves no. The ability to tell ourselves not right now. This isn't the best choice for me. This isn't the direction that I want to go. And guys, that gets developed in the trenches, all right? You don't learn this when you're at your goal weight or you're walking around in your goal body. You learn this when you're in the trenches going through it before you ever become that version of yourself. You are designing and developing that version of yourself in real time during that process. And so many people miss all of that because they're only focused on the end goal, and they look at the process kind of like it's a problem, rather than looking at the process like it's an opportunity. That process is an opportunity to turn you into somebody that you've always dreamed of being for the rest of your life. Not just so you look good in a bathing suit for vacation, then you undo all that hard work, or not just so you uh get lean enough to get on stage, but then you can never get lean again because you have no self-control and you didn't develop any any skill during that time. You just followed a meal plan and showed up for workouts. So I want to challenge you here, okay? I want you to start slowing down, taking a deep breath, thinking about what you're going through, okay? Thinking about the difficulty of applying yourself day in, day out, of making yourself go to those workouts you don't feel like doing, of making yourself get those steps in that you don't feel like getting in.

Training And Recovery Gap Message

SPEAKER_02 12:19

If your body feels tight, worn down, or just off more often than it should, that's not something you just have to live with. A lot of people are doing the workouts, trying to eat better, staying active, but they're still dealing with constant tension, nagging aches, low energy, and their body's just not responding the way it should. That's the gap. At THI we bridge the gap between training and recovery, combining strength training, nutrition, and targeted body work to improve how your body actually functions. You don't just look better, but you actually feel better, move better, and perform better in your everyday life. If that's the piece you've been missing, we're here when you're ready. Alright, back to the episode.

The 3,000 Step Discipline Test

SPEAKER_02 13:02

For example, last night or yesterday, I was very busy at work. And as a trainer, as a um licensed massage therapist, as a stretch therapist, although my job is very active, I'm I'm constantly lifting weights, moving weights, demonstrating exercises, you know, and body work, I'm constantly moving people's body around, lunging, squatting, stretching, lifting, all these different things. But it doesn't, it's not very many steps when I have those really busy days like that. And then when I add in the computer work and the behind-the-scenes stuff and creating content and things like the podcasts, all these different things, all of these are for the most part, either sitting or just kind of pacing back and forth, not a lot of steps. So by the end of the day, I was wiped out. Like, I didn't even want to get in the shower and take a shower. And I'm the type of person, like, I don't even like to sit on my bed until I'm clean. I do not like the thought of a dirty body on a clean bed. But I was so tired, I was like, man, man, if I was anybody else, I probably would just say, hey, I'm just gonna be a little funky, go to bed, and I'll shower in the morning. But I said, no, you know what? Discipline. I'm gonna go take this shower, I'll feel better after it's done, and then I can go to sleep. I even turned the water on, right? Like had it running. It was like, oh yeah, this is about to be relaxing. I'm so ready, I'm just done. Then, as I'm taking my watch off, I happen to glance at my steps, and I was about 3,000 steps under my target goal for right now. And boy, oh boy, was that an internal battle in that moment. I was like, you know what? Pardon my language, screw these steps. I am done. I don't care. It is what it is. I'm just gonna accept what it is and do better tomorrow. Okay. And the first thing that came to my mind, number one, was my clients. Because this is an area where I'm constantly preaching. Hey, sometimes we have to do those things we don't want to do so we can become who we want to be. Okay. This is just how it is. You're gonna have those days where you don't want to do it, but you do it anyways. All right. That's the development that takes place. And now I'm having to live this in real life action, like real, real time. Because I'm like, man, nobody even knows if I don't get these steps in. No, my clients know, no, my friends know, my spouse doesn't know. My kids aren't gonna judge me for it. Like, nobody cares if I'm 3,000 steps short for the day. But I know that I care. And I know the version of me who I am today would be upset with myself if I would have not done what I told myself I was going to stick to. So I put my clothes back on. Like literally, I was literally stepping in the shower and realized I didn't take my watch off yet. Put my clothes back on, turned the shower off, pulled my little walking pad out because now it's dark outside and my kids are asleep. My wife was having to work late. So going outside to get my steps in was a no-go. So I pulled out the little walking pad that I cannot stand walking on because I do not like walking inside. And I got on there. My wife comes home and she had actually called when she was on her way home from work and I was about to get in the shower, and I got off the phone with her to get in the shower. That's why I forgot I didn't have my watch on. You guys are learning a lot about my life right now. Anywho, she comes home and she's like, What are you doing? I thought you were getting the shower. And I'm like, Well, I didn't realize that I was missing too many steps, so I gotta knock it out. So I spent about the next 30 minutes getting the rest of my steps in, and then made myself go and get about 300 more just for the fact that I caught myself slipping, and then shut it off, put it away, went and took the shower, and was done. And that was one of those moments where I had to face myself and my tendency to just be lazy. I'm gonna call it what it is, be lazy and decide, you know what, I would much rather just lay in bed and probably veg or watch a show or even go to sleep instead of devoting this 30 minutes to getting these steps that I said I was going to get in each day. And that exact action is building the person that I desire to be because I chose discipline instead of comfort, I chose commitment instead of convenience. Okay? I chose holding the standard and holding myself accountable instead of slacking off and and giving myself an out. Because again, nobody was there. No one's there to judge you. You can choose whatever you want. When you're standing in front of the cabinet, you can choose whatever you want. Nobody's there to judge you, nobody's watching you, no one's clocking your calories for you. But you have the opportunity and the ability to override that desire for what you want, for what you really want in the long term. Okay? That is character development in real time. And so many people don't realize that they're actually building their character, they just look at it from the negative side of, oh, I have to do this, I have to get these steps in, and then they're getting the steps in, they hate it every second, and then afterwards, when they're done, they're like, oh, now I got 30 minutes less, now I'm staying up later, or I gotta go straight to sleep. And they wake up the next day, like, oh, I'm tired because I got less sleep, or I didn't get to relax and wind down, so now I feel like I've just went from yesterday right into today. Instead of saying, Man, look at that. The old me would have definitely skipped those steps. But I'm becoming something better, I'm becoming something new, and I'm becoming somebody who holds themselves accountable to what they promised themselves.

Drop Self Hate And Stay Present

SPEAKER_02 19:16

That is powerful, guys. So I challenge you along your journey to take the time to appreciate where you're at, where you've come from, and who you're becoming as you are turning into the person that you desire to be. Don't just, you know, avoid looking in the mirror and just hate yourself until you finally get to where you want to be. Because even when you get there, it's not gonna be that sweet when you've when you've lived a life, months, years of self-hate to get there. Instead, embrace who you are because you are wonderfully made and you are special and you are powerful and you are beautiful, regardless of how you look and how you feel about it. And if you want to change it, then by golly, that is your right to do so. But don't lose sight of who you actually are, don't lose sight of the journey, the hard times, the struggle. Because when you truly embrace that and you accept the fact that you know what, this isn't easy and it's not supposed to be, and you look for those little nuggets of growth that you experience along the way, now you're able to actually cultivate the person that you desire to be. And when you become that person, one it's gonna feel natural, no imposter syndrome, no like, oh yeah, I'm here, but I still feel like the fat person. Because that whole time, you didn't go from fat to skinny overnight, you didn't go from fat to fit overnight, it took time, months, years, but all along the way, from that start point to that finish line, you were developing who you are all along the way.

Meal Prep As Identity Training

SPEAKER_02 21:16

So don't miss that, guys. Don't miss the beauty of the journey, don't it don't look past the beauty of the journey. I know meal prepping sucks. Let's be real. Unless you love to cook, meal prep sucks. But that satisfaction when you go in there and grab one of those meals, knowing that you don't have to make a poor choice because you were unprepared, that you took the time and prepared to win on purpose. And guess what? On Tuesday, when you're still eating those lunches that you made that you know are keeping you on track for your goals, you're not even gonna think. About the time that it took to prep those meals, the frustration, how tired you were, how worn out you were, how irritated you were with having to be in the kitchen, how much you hated having to clean up the dishes afterwards. How you could have been spending that hour, two hours of your evening on your off day doing something you wanted to do that you enjoyed doing. You're not going to think about none of that. It's done. The suffering's over. Now you can sit and be proud of the fact that, hey, look what I did. I set myself up for success. I'm a person who sets myself up for success. I'm a person who wins on purpose.

SPEAKER_01 22:43

That's what you're gaining out of that, guys. You're not gaining meals.

SPEAKER_02 22:50

You're gaining character development. You're becoming that person that you've watched on TikTok who is talking about how they meal prep this and meal prep that, and how they make sure that they're getting in their macros and getting in their protein and they're consistent and they show up and they work hard and they and you're just like fired up watching and inspired, and like, yeah, this is it. I need to be that person. Yeah, that's how I want to be. You don't even realize you're becoming that all along. All along, guys, you are developing that person. So take hold of this. I promise you, this is gonna make the journey so much sweeter and so much more enjoyable. Because exercise isn't always fun. But when you understand what you're gaining from it, not just what you're losing, the time, the energy, but what you're gaining from it. I'm getting more fit. I'm getting more resilient, I'm getting stronger. I'm building a body that's made to last. I'm building a body that's going to carry me through each season of life so that no matter what I face, me and my body are in this thing together. That's what you're gaining from that. Look at the positive things that are happening along the journey. Don't just focus on how hard it is and how much you don't like it. Focus on the good things, the benefit. That's the sweet part, guys. That's what makes the whole journey worth it. Not the end game result, but who you are becoming along the way. Not the final destination, but the character that's being developed in the process. That's not only going to keep you where you've become, who you've become, but take you far beyond your wildest imagination. It's that serious, guys. It's that big. I know I'm sounding dramatic, but it's that serious.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

So take this to heart. Your journey is yours. You are putting in the work.

SPEAKER_02 25:03

You're doing it for you. You're doing it for your loved ones. You're doing it for your future. Those are all good things. But also, and most importantly, you're doing it to become the best version of you that this world has ever seen. And you can't be anybody else. Everybody else is taken. This world needs the best you possible. That's what we need is the best you that you can be. And that comes from the development along your journey. Take it beyond just the physical. Develop your mind. Develop yourself spiritually, mentally, emotionally, relationally, not just physically. Now you're becoming a powerhouse. It's not about just looking good in a swimsuit and impressing people. It's about how can I be a dangerously disciplined and consistent person in everything that I do. What do you think is gonna stop you then? Nothing in this life. You are powerful, you are made for greatness. So walk in that, guys. And every step you take in the right direction is developing in that. And get this.

Mistakes Become Lessons With A Plan

SPEAKER_02 26:31

Every wrong step you take away from that direction is also developing that person if you let it, because they are learning opportunities. Like they say, we don't take losses, we take lessons. You don't truly lose if you learn from it. So don't beat yourself up because you didn't do exactly what you said you were gonna do when you said you were gonna do it. Just like if I didn't get my steps in last night, I shouldn't have beat myself up over it today. That wouldn't be the right approach. The right approach would be to learn. Say, okay, coach, you're the coach. You know how to structure things. Get up a little bit earlier. Make sure you knock out more steps early so you don't run into this problem tomorrow. When you know you have a busy day on your schedule, plan an easy lunch that you can hold in your hand and walk around with so you can get steps in. Plan an evening walk with your family. There's ways to do it, but you can learn from that. So learn from the mistakes. Learn from the times that you let yourself down. Because now those aren't losses, those were lessons. Iron sharpens iron, and sometimes you got to be your own iron and sharpen yourself. That is designing the person that you want to be, not just the successful moments, not just when everything's going right, when everything is going wrong, but yet you keep rising, you keep grinding, you keep getting up and dusting yourself off and going back at it and taking the lessons that you've learned and applying this new knowledge and this new understanding and this new wisdom and using it to help you keep winning. And when you do that again and again and again and again and again, now who you are after that will look nothing like you did in the beginning. Inside and out.

The Steroids Analogy For Character

SPEAKER_02 28:37

You know, I'm gonna leave you with this example here. When you hear about steroids, right? Anabolic steroids. And we've all heard the phrase uh roid rage, right? Well, steroids are bad because they make you roid rage and they make people really mean and angry and evil.

SPEAKER_01 28:58

Well, I'm gonna tell you guys, that's not true at all. What steroids do is they bring out who you are on the inside and they magnify that.

SPEAKER_02 29:11

So if you're naturally an angry person on the inside, you're gonna be a very angry person on the inside and on the outside. They say that steroids, you know, increase your sex drive, make sure your kids aren't listening. This disclaimer, you never know what you're gonna hear on the podcast. But maybe that drive, people say, oh, that's gonna intensify that drive, so this is why you shouldn't take it. No. If you naturally have a high drive, it's probably gonna make it higher.

SPEAKER_01 29:41

If you're naturally an emotional person, it may make you hyper-emotional. That's that's the way that it works.

SPEAKER_02 29:52

It brings out who you are on the inside and it magnifies that. And that's the same thing that our journey is designed to do. It's to reshape who we are on the inside and then magnify that so that the world can see who we've become. The world is the last one to see it. We have to be the first because first we have to believe it's possible, and then we have to put in the work day in and day out when nobody's looking so that we can make it manifest on the outside. And every single step we take is developing that person we are on the inside, and then every time that we get it right from there on is magnifying this new version of ourselves, and then we're adding to it, and then we're magnifying, and then we're adding to it, and then we're magnifying, and then in the end, metamorphosis, transformation. So today, enjoy the journey, embrace the struggle, learn the lessons, adapt, and continue on. You can win, you can do it, and you deserve it. So I love you guys, and I leave you

Final Challenge And Send Off

SPEAKER_02 31:11

with this. Do something today that's good for your health, good for yourself, good for those that you care about, and whatever you do, make sure you win on purpose. We'll talk with you next time. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. We share general health and fitness information and professional experience, not individualized medical advice. This content does not replace professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult a qualified healthcare professional before making any changes to your health routine.