Connecting Your Emotions to Purpose and Vision

What if your emotions could serve as a compass, guiding you toward your true purpose? In this episode of Friday Feelings, we sit down with the powerhouse behind Women in the Arena, Audra Agen, to explore how emotional intelligence fuels purpose, clarity, and transformation.

From navigating career shifts to embracing change, Audra shares her deeply personal journey of self-discovery—how she turned frustration into action, grief into growth, and uncertainty into unwavering purpose. We’ll unpack the mind-body connection, the power of self-awareness, and why getting out of your comfort zone is the first step toward unlocking your true potential.

This episode is a raw, real, and inspiring deep dive into emotional resilience, self-reflection, and stepping boldly into the unknown.

Key Takeaways from This Episode:
🔥 Why emotions are the key to uncovering purpose and vision
🌱 The power of self-awareness in processing transitions and moving forward
💡 How to reframe fear, grief, or uncertainty into personal growth
🚴 The mind-body connection—why movement can shift your emotional state
💭 Practical strategies for aligning your emotions with meaningful action

🎙 Guest Spotlight: Audra Agen, host of Women in the Arena, shares how she turned her emotions into action, built a thriving platform for women’s voices, and transformed her personal and professional life in the process.

Whether you’re navigating a season of transition, seeking clarity, or looking for motivation to take the next step, this episode will leave you inspired, empowered, and ready to embrace your next chapter.

🎧 Listen now and step into your own arena with confidence!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:06

Hello everyone and welcome to Friday Feelings, where we turn emotions into power, vulnerability into strength, and remind you to feel everything, fear nothing, and transform your life. I'm your host, Janelle Friday, and this is a really exciting episode. We're talking about connecting your emotions to purpose and vision. So, in essence, our emotions are powerful drivers of purpose and vision that guide us towards what truly matters in our lives. So, in this episode, I'm going to explore with my amazing guest how emotional intelligence helps drive and align your emotions with your values, goals, and long-term aspirations. So I want to first start by welcoming my lovely friend and guest, Audra. Audra, thank you so much for being here with us today.

SPEAKER_01 0:53

Danelle, thank you so much for having me. I've been looking forward to sitting here and talking with you about emotions and connecting them to action. This is gonna be super fun.

SPEAKER_00 1:05

Yeah, I agree. So I'll just give a quick background background. Audra and I connected through Professional Network. Um, and as we were talking about her project and her podcast, we just built a really great relationship. And then I had the amazing chance. Those of you who work remotely, you know, we don't get to meet each other very often, but Audra happened to come through Denver. So we had a girl's night out and worked on a crafting project and got to just spend some time uh getting to know each other. And I've come to really respect her journey, her vulnerability, her strength. Uh, and and she's someone I look up to on a on a very deep level. So um, Audra, tell us a little bit about um you, your, your podcast, what you're doing, your life. Uh, let us get to know you a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 1:49

Well, I am a working professional. I I am a woman in a male-dominated field. Yay! I'm I've got lots of company. Um, I am a married mom. I have um, I'm almost a 30-year-married veteran.

SPEAKER_00 2:06

Congratulations. That's amazing.

SPEAKER_01 2:08

That will be married 30 years in October. Uh, I have two adult children, one of which is married, the other one will be married in in May. Um, and almost five years ago, I started a podcast, not having any clue as to what I was doing, but had a vision as to what I wanted and why I wanted it. And the most amazing things have happened because I stepped out of a comfort zone and just stepped out of faith, stepped out on faith and chased a vision.

SPEAKER_00 2:50

That's amazing. So the name of the podcast is Women in the Arena. Okay. So um you have in at you're not at home right now. You're you're with your son, you're being a good mom. Um, but at home, you have something behind you when we do Zoom calls. Do you want to tell us about that?

SPEAKER_01 3:07

I do. So I have this fairly large plaque behind me, and it is the Teddy Roosevelt quote. And it is a Teddy Roosevelt quote of Man in the Arena, although it the pronouns are changed and it says women in the arena. And interestingly enough, this plaque has hung on my wall for years, and it has been on my wall longer than I actually had this podcast. And I had this made by a friend of mine after I watched a Brene Brown special on Netflix. And I thought, what an amazing quote. But the pronouns are wrong because this sounds more like every woman I know. So I called, I immediately called a friend of mine who's an artist, and I said, I need to you to make this for me, fix the pronouns, and I'm gonna hang it on my wall in my office. And that's where it hung for two years before I ever had the inspiration to create a podcast.

SPEAKER_00 4:11

I love that. So um I have the quote pulled up, unless you do if you want to read it.

SPEAKER_01 4:15

I don't have it, but okay, that's available to me. So you go ahead and okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:19

So this is Teddy Veltro uh Teddy Roosevelt's speech, Citizenship in a Republic delivered in 1910. It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or whether the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming, but who does actually strive to do the deeds, who knows great enthusiasm, the great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. That's amazing. And sorry I didn't put the her in there or woman, uh, but it but it's so inspiring. And so here we go. Here's the podcast, women in the arena. And you have been on air for how long now?

SPEAKER_01 5:29

It'll be five years on my birthday, June 24th, 2025.

SPEAKER_00 5:35

I love that. And so um tell us about what's the what's who do you tell us about who you bring to the podcast? Who who is the podcast for?

SPEAKER_01 5:47

Honestly, the podcast is for me. If you want to be great. I love that. The podcast, the podcast was created because I needed it. Um I needed a place where I could connect with exceptional women just like me, that I could reach out to them, I could talk to them, I could ask them questions, and they would be willing to be vulnerable and transparent with me and not give me any pretense. And I didn't want it to be shiny, I didn't want it to be overproduced, I wanted it to be real. So I went looking for this community. I didn't set out to create something, I went looking for it originally and couldn't find it. So that's why I made it. And I started with my friends because they were the most amazing, remarkable people I knew. And then I said, okay, if you like this, then you need to introduce me to other amazing, remarkable people that you know. Yeah, yeah. And that's that's how it how it grew. And it grew literally one woman at a time, and now these amazing, remarkable women from all over the planet find me to tell me they're amazing, incredible, remarkable, vulnerable, beautiful, heartbreaking, extraordinary stories.

SPEAKER_00 7:25

That's that's amazing. And I I mean, I've been a fan, I'm a listener. Um, and so I I want us to okay. So that's your podcast, that's what you did. That's this massive project. So let's switch a little bit, right? I want to talk about the emotional journey it's taken you on as you've been on a physical emotional journey kind of at the same time.

SPEAKER_01 7:47

Yeah. Um this this podcast was the spark. Um, because it started with it started with anger, uh, it started with frustration, and it started with this. I need this. It started with why are these amazing, remarkable women all around me and nobody sees them? Why is that? Why are these amazing women so brilliant and nobody sees them and getting so frustrated, so angry, and not anybody recognizing how much they pour themselves into absolutely any everything that they do, and nobody sees it. So I will elevate them and elevate their voices because I was screaming from the inside out, and so were all of them. So this was my rebellion. So it started born out of need and raw anger and frustration, and it's and it was born in COVID. Like there are a lot of things born during COVID. So there was so it there was all kinds of of other emotions going on during COVID. Um I launched it on my 49th birthday, not knowing what I was doing, not not knowing if anybody was gonna listen to it, not knowing what was gonna happen. My my son helped me launch it, and what was going on at the time was we were on lockdown, um and we were doing Zoom University. Everybody was at home. So my daughter was home doing Zoom University, her fiance, who is now her husband, was was was with us two weeks on, two weeks off because we were you know doing pods, you know, we were doing our pods. Um my son was at home, he was in flight school, and his now fiance was with us uh because she was at the same university as my daughter, and they were gonna be roommates. So I had this big, noisy, beautiful, amazing, chaotic house full. And I knew that I was capturing time in a bottle. I knew it. I knew it was my last hurrah. And so I made the most of it as much as I could. And I launched this crazy thing. So I didn't know what I was doing, had a full house, was barely keeping on my sanity, as everybody else was, but was trying to make the best of it. Then I was like, what can I get done in in a year? It's amazing what you can get done in a year. Uh like I said, I had no idea if anybody'd listen to it. Turns out people do. And I've met the most extraordinary women all over the world that I would never have met had I not done this. But in parallel, as the world has evolved, my life has evolved. These these children have now gone on to get married. My son has now moved across the country, and now this big, noisy, chaotic, beautiful, extraordinary, full house has now become very quiet. And I had to become accustomed to that. So while I was filling my my life with this extraordinary gift of these incredible women sharing their vulnerabilities and their stories and and pouring their their their souls into this the their this microphone and and the it's amazing what happens when you have these intimate conversations because the screen goes away, the microphone goes away, and it's just this the distance goes away. I mean, it's just you and your guest. And that it that's a gift. That's a tremendous gift. So even though I was having this incredible gift with this, with my uh guest and my audience members, my life on the other side was starting to feel empty. And those two things felt like they were in complete contrast to each other. And I I felt empty. I was incredibly depressed, and it was a delayed depression because for a little while I was able to occupy myself with prepping for my daughter's wedding. But after a while, you can only outrun that for a little for a because then the wedding happens. Because then the wedding happens, and then and then your emotions catch up to you, and then you have to face them, and then you have to face the finality that there is a chapter of your life that is done and it's not coming back, yeah. And that was that was a a reality that was difficult to face, and I struggled with for an entire year, but I knew that I needed to go through it, I knew that I needed to process through it. I didn't hide it.

SPEAKER_00 14:06

I did let's let's pause there for a second because I want to call out one thing. We're talking about um the finality of a season of life, right? I think whether you call them chapters, whether you call them seasons, it's all the same. Um when a season comes to a close, the it's the finality, we may or may not get closure. And and a lot of the time it's difficult to move forward because we don't know what's ahead, right? And so I wanna I want to address anyone who's listening to this. Um if you're identifying that you're coming to a close in a season in your life, my question is, do you know what comes next? If the answer is yes, is there fear of failure? Is there fear there or anxiety or stress? If the answer is no, and we're looking at something that's unknown, where do you find yourself in this moment? And Audra, for you to get to the place to say, I know I have to work through it, I know I have to face the emotions, tells me that you've done it before. Right? Because if you'd not gone through something difficult, this is one of those moments that could break you, that could break down someone because we learn through mistakes, we learn through previous experiences. And for you to be, even though it took you a year, what I would say is there are so many of us that have not faced life-altering moments where we have a dose of reality that's a really cold splash of water in the face, and we're forced to move forward whether we like it or not. Right. So I'm curious from uh help help me help us understand how did you know that you had to face the emotion to get through it instead of instead of retreating internally and avoiding and staying in that place of, you know.

SPEAKER_01 15:57

I recognize what it what it was. When I finally admitted to myself what I was feeling, then I knew that I had to allow myself to feel it and go through the process. And what I was feeling was mourning. I was mourning. And I know that that sounds strange because you know, my my kids are alive and well, they are fine, they are thriving, but I was mourning the end of something that you love that I absolutely love. And I c it was not gonna be the same, it was gonna change, it might be better in the future, but that those crazy Friday nights in my household were done. Pizza night with the kids every Friday was done.

SPEAKER_00 16:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:55

Movie night with with junk food and having you know 50 kids run in and out of my household and tracking crap in my house. Done. It's all done.

SPEAKER_00 17:11

So you took the time to process, right? You said it took you about a year.

SPEAKER_01 17:14

It took me a year.

SPEAKER_00 17:16

And then what changed? How did you pivot to take a step forward?

SPEAKER_01 17:24

Honestly, I got on my bike. I got on my bike. I um I quit going to the gym because I kept, I think, I kept what going, I kept the same routine. I kept kept doing the same routine. I kept going into the gym thinking if I if I just work out more in this gym, it'll just I'll just work it out. And it just wasn't it wasn't working, it wasn't happening. I mean, it was the gym was depressing. I mean, it was just depressing. It was a depressing place. And I just I quit going and I got on my bike and went outside. There's trails all around my house. And I told my husband, I said, I'm taking my bike to the bike shop, I'm having it team tuned up, and I'm gonna ride my bike. And I said, if I have to get up, I live in Arizona, if I have to get up at five in the morning, so I can ride my bike at five in the morning so I don't die because it's 150 degrees in July.

SPEAKER_00 18:31

And that's what I'm gonna do. So, what did your bike ride do for you?

SPEAKER_01 18:36

It changed my routine, it got me outside. If if you are feeling sad, go outside. Yeah, I I don't I don't know what fresh air and some sunshine. Fresh air and sunshine does you wonders. Putting your feet on the grass does you wonders, but uh changing so physically changing my environment. Okay, that did something.

SPEAKER_02 19:08

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 19:09

Uh there's something that happens when you can move forward. So when your feet are moving forward and your hands are are somewhat moving in the air, there is a mind-body connection that happens that starts to change the chemistry of your brain.

SPEAKER_00 19:37

Okay, y'all. I didn't tell her to say that. We've talked about mind-body connection. I just want to say that was completely authentic for Baudra. And I love that you're transitioning transitioning to that because um, you know, we're gonna we're I'm gonna try to keep us to time. I feel like we could sit here and talk forever. So let's dive right into that, which is connecting your mind and body means that you can use your emotions to provide clarity on personal values and aspirations, right? You're connecting a physical change in your body, which contributes to the gray matter in your brain that is responsible for how our brains think and process about ourselves, about others, and about life. So literally, what Audra's saying is that by getting out of her normal routine, doing something physical, being outside, we know is good for the body, the brain. Um, she was physically telling her body and her brain, I'm moving forward, literally. And so now we're at the point where you're feeling good, you're riding your bike. Tell us about um the you're literally becoming self-aware, a new level of self-awareness. And so let's shift into okay, you're now self-aware, you know what you need to do. How does the purpose come in after that? What was your purpose on the other side?

SPEAKER_01 20:54

Um it's my purpose started to become clearer. Like I started to see things in a different level, meaning like it started to strip off layers. Like it was like clouds started to clear. And it was, is this what I want to do? How do I want to show up in the world? So I started to be with purpose with everything I do, meaning, how do I want to show up in my marriage? Do I do I really want to drag around old baggage in my marriage? If there's is there anything I can do about it today that happened 10 years ago, 20 years ago? No. Is uh we doing are there habits that we're still doing that affect us today? No. Well then why am I dragging it with me? Okay, d do I need it? No. Has has his behaviors changed and improved? From the w behaviors I didn't like before? Yes. But why am I dragging that with me? It's really heavy. I think I'll drop it. So I try to change on how I show up in my marriage. How do I show up in my friendships? There have there's been some friendships that I unfortunately had to walk away from because of the way they didn't show up.

SPEAKER_00 22:31

That's such a hard thing to do. It's hard. It's really hard because growing up, I mean, we've talked from a faith perspective. I was taught that you don't ever walk away. Because if you love Jesus, that's not something you're ever allowed to do because Jesus loves everyone and you're supposed to represent Jesus. So you never are allowed. And and it's only until my adult life that I realize how toxic that mentality is. And there comes a point when you have to have personal boundaries. So you at that point, I would say you were figuring out what your personal boundaries were as well.

SPEAKER_01 23:08

Yeah, it was really strange. It was really strange.

SPEAKER_00 23:12

And are you surprised by the boundaries that you realized were there that you had maybe ignored or not had before?

SPEAKER_01 23:20

Um, yeah, yeah. Surprise me. Um, I mean, and I started questioning things um on everything. Like, what do I want to do going forward? Is this is this what I want to do professionally? Is this environment that I'm in good enough for me? And and if it is, great. How do I want to show up here? If it isn't, how do I want to change it? And if that means if it's not how I want it to look, then how do I want it to look? And can I design that? You know, and so yeah, I started to create all kinds of different things on what I wanted them to look like and how I wanted to show up. And it's it's been kind of weird. I mean, in the best way possible, and in some in some heartbreaking ways, too.

unknown 24:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:27

You know, growth is never easy. I mean, I I was I've said to my children many times, if it were if it were easy, they would call it something other than growing pains. They would call it that's so true.

SPEAKER_00 24:44

I agree. And and you know, when you think about because I want to, I wanna excuse me, I always want to tie this back to to EQ and tactical application. So um physically, besides biking, right? Because what I talk about in regards to getting your emotions out, you can bike, you can, I have a friend, my friend Stina who runs, right? There are people that do a physical release, but there's also a need from a visual perspective to work out the internal voice that you hear with the truth from like a verbal affirmation or a I am statement or sticky notes that are around you. So, what habits have you created for yourself to keep you and your mind on the path that you've chosen that you're committed to?

SPEAKER_01 25:31

Well, I'm I'm still not quite comfortable with writing things down. Um, and that is that's an old childhood habit. I'm oldest of four, you know, those rotten younger siblings will will take everything and read it out loud. So I so I still haven't been able to bring myself to write it down. Although I did write or I did order a self-guided journal to do it. I just haven't given myself the quiet time to to start reflecting and do it, but I I have every intention of doing that. But what I do, my version of quiet time and self-reflection is at least for now, is done through creativity. And that's and for me, that is something that I do with my hands, and that's I crochet and and I sew. And there is another that there's another, there's another science thing. I'm dropping some science. Um, there's a connection between creativity and doing something with your hands and your brain, it it physically slows down your brain, it lowers your blood pressure, and it allows you to have some clarity. So when I need some clarity and I need to think, I will do something creative to allow me to do that because it is physically impossible for you to feel anxiety and be creative at the same time, because it's two different parts of the brain. And if you want to calm yourself down, go do something creative. Color something. If you're if you're not a sewer or a crochet or knitter or whatever, you can you can color, you can color in a coloring book.

SPEAKER_00 27:30

I'm one of those, I have those adult coloring books and I use markers, you know. Um, and the thing that we did in Denver, if you're ever in Denver, look up something called up the upstairs circus. So it's a bar with all these different projects. You pay a fee for the project you want to do, they give you all the supplies and they just kind of let you go. Um, and so Audra had some trouble with the hotels. She got there a little bit late. But I just I wanted to celebrate that as our time together because I'm a crafter, I make wreaths and I do interior. Like I love Hobby Lobby, if you know what Hobby Lobby is. Um, but I think that's really profound. All that to say, let's get back to you know, our title today, connecting your emotions to purpose and vision. So really, um you went through the process of we're closing one season, going into another, and there's emotions there that are difficult to address, but you address them, and by addressing them, you became self-aware to a new level, which ultimately you took and you harnessed all of those emotions to determine how you were going to move forward in a completely different method than you had before, right?

SPEAKER_01 28:43

Accurate. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 28:44

So for anyone listening to this podcast, Audra, maybe they're stuck. Maybe they're having a hard time closing the book to the season that they've lost or are about to lose. Maybe they have moved forward, but they don't know how to find their vision. Maybe, like a lot of us, the emotions are so heavy and negative emotions. Look, we've all had negative emotions, really strong ones, whether you're crying, whether you're screaming, whether you're angry, the body doesn't like negative emotions. They don't feel good physically in your body. So we naturally avoid them. And I get that. However, I think Audrey you could probably talk about this from an emo from a physical emotional perspective. If you don't, if you don't face the emotions, if you don't work through the two truth, if you don't do everything you can do to move forward through the painful emotions to the other side, what happens?

SPEAKER_01 29:44

Your body will rebel against you. Yeah. The people think that emotions are just a mental thing. They are not. There's no separation between your emotions, your mind, and your body. They are all one organism. So your body remembers your feelings. They sit somewhere. Some somewhere. When I am upset, my emotions are either in my stomach or in my head or in my shoulders. That is where my emotions sit. They might be for some people, they might be in your back.

SPEAKER_00 30:27

They're in my gut, in my chest, in my gut. Yeah. Some people might be in their hips. Yeah. And if you don't know where your emotions sit, this is why we talk about it. And so, um, I because I already know we're over time. I don't care about, I don't care for this episode. Um, let's let's drop some advice, Audra. So for all those people that I kind of mentioned, no matter where they are, where would you, if they were sitting in front of you and saying, I want to do what you did, how do I do that? What advice can you offer? What tools or methods or you know, things that you've learned that you could help share?

SPEAKER_01 31:02

First, it's okay where you are. It's okay. That's that's human. That is human. Don't quit trying to fight it. The more you struggle, the harder it is. Now I'm I'm not saying that you know embrace it and and you know hold on to it forever. I'm just saying don't try to pretend that you're not there. Process through the emotions because the only way out is through. And you'll know. You will know when you are ready for another direction. I knew I was ready because I had processed through, and I was like, okay, I'm I'm ready to see some I'm ready to see the sun. But I need something to help me see the sun. And when you're ready to see the sun, do something physical. You don't have to go and jump on your bike like I did, but maybe go take a walk. Something as simple as that. Or take a take a yoga class, move your body. It doesn't have to be strenuous, but move your body. But get outside, even if it is 10 minutes a day, get outside, especially if you work from home, get out of your house.

SPEAKER_00 32:44

Yeah. And so I'm gonna tie this back into the title of your podcast, Women in the Arena, The Man in the Arena. I want to highlight what it says at the very end, is that if who who at it at the best knows that in the end of uh that the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. If you don't do anything, you are defeated. If you don't do anything, nothing will change. If you think that by reading a book, listening to a song, sitting on your couch and playing video games and thinking about things is going to help you move forward, I'm here to tell you you are wrong. Your brain and your body both have to come together. And the only way for that to do that is for you to face it, acknowledge it, and deal with it. Because by not doing it, you are immobilizing your soul, your heart, your brain, your body. And there's nowhere to go. So if you're stuck today, if you need encouragement today, if you are inspired today, um, the first thing I'm going to tell you to do is to listen to women in the arena. So, Audra, where can they connect with you?

SPEAKER_01 34:03

They can connect with me um on anywhere you listen to podcasts, because we're everywhere. Um, you can go catch us on social media, or you can old-fashioned email me, which I actually responded to my email, which is audra at womeninthearena.net.

SPEAKER_00 34:21

I love that. And um as always, uh for for everyone listening today, I'm also someone who, if you're listening and you identify with what we're talking about, you want to have a personal one-on-one conversation, I'm always open to that. But the goal of this podcast, as always, is to be inspired to fear, uh, feel, gosh, I'm struggling with words today. What the heck? Okay, is to be inspired to feel deeply, uh, to be fearless and to live authentically, to keep leaning into those feelings because real transformation starts from within and it's by taking a step forward. So, Audra, I could talk to you forever. Thank you so much for your time today and taking some time while you're uh being a good mom to your son. And I'm just so grateful for women like you who are inspiring all of us to be vulnerable, to be honest, and to look to empower each other. Uh, so thank you for everything you're doing.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Thank you. And thank you for everything that you're doing in talking about this very, very specific and special caught uh topic of EQ, because we don't talk about it enough. I think that it is woefully uh under uh under uh developed. And I think that the more people that know about it and use it, I think that we'd be a much happier place.

SPEAKER_00 35:46

I agree. And it's and it's not conceptual, right? That's the whole point of this podcast and what I'm what my goal with Lionheart uh CS is, which is you've got to get out of the book and into real life, which um for me was the reality that I had to go through and the realization that um when science tells us that by speaking positive things out loud to yourself every day helps you, if you trust science, then you do it. If you don't do it and you don't see results, then there's no question as to why you're not moving forward. So, my perspective in all this is I've learned that by literally applying the things that I'm learning and the practical tools that EQ has given us, that that personal transformation is possible, but without putting the effort in, without moving forward, without putting myself in the arena, I'm always going to remain where I am. And all of us have to get to that point in life where we say, okay, I'm I'm done. I'm done being on the couch, I'm done being stuck at a job that I hate. I'm done not taking a shot on myself. And from a from a leadership perspective and putting women in a light to say, look at what's possible when you decide to take a chance on yourself. You are the living embodiment of that. And I'm so um, I'm so proud of what you're doing. And again, I'm just I couldn't be more delighted that you took time with us today. So thank you again.

SPEAKER_01 37:11

Thank you. Thank you for having me here. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 37:13

You got it. Well, have a great weekend, everybody, and we'll talk next week. Bye.