Breaking Free from Self-Sabotage: Breathwork, Awareness, and Sustainable Fitness Results

Breaking Free from Self-Sabotage: Breathwork, Awareness, and Sustainable Fitness Results

In this episode of the Muscles and Mindset Revolution Podcast, host Anne Jones walks you through a live breathwork / meditation and delves into the topic of self-sabotage.

Coach Anne begins with a guided breathwork and meditation session aimed at enhancing body awareness. The discussion then shifts to identifying and overcoming self-sabotaging behaviors, both conscious and unconscious.

Coach Anne explores the reasons behind these behaviors and provides strategies for breaking the cycle, including inviting compassion, boosting emotional tolerance, and aligning actions with authentic goals.

Practical examples and personal anecdotes are used to help listeners recognize their own patterns and take actionable steps toward sustainable fitness and mental well-being.

00:43 Breath Work and Meditation

10:56 Understanding Self-Sabotage

11:43 Types of Self-Sabotage

13:53 Common Self-Sabotaging Behaviors

20:34 Overcoming Self-Sabotage

27:42 Aligning Actions with Authentic Self

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Transcript

Speaker 8: 0:00

Welcome to the muscles and mindset revolution podcast, the show where we cut through the BS and make fitness nutrition and mindset simple, sustainable, and actually doable, even for the busiest women. I'm Anne Jones, life coach, mindset coach, and fitness professional for over 15 years here to help you build strength, feel confident AF and finally see results that last without stressing, obsessing, or starting over every Monday. Today's episode is a little different. This is a repurposed live group coaching call from Inside Muscles and Mindset, where I coached my clients on one of my very favorite topics, the sneaky ways self sabotage show up and more importantly, how to break free from it. Before we dive in, we're going to start with a few minutes of breath work and meditation. So make yourself comfortable and enjoy. Let's get into it.

Speaker: 0:52

Make yourself comfortable and we're just going to start with a few minutes of breath work, meditation really, and we'll just do like a body awareness practice. So really what I would like to do is teach you guys more consistently how to tune into your own body because we talk about it all the time. So you could lay down if that's like you're in a position where that's happening, but if not just sit comfortably and sit nice and tall and you can close your eyes or If it doesn't feel quite right to close your eyes, you can just soften your gaze. And then for those of us who tend to move quickly or aren't doing a lot of things, I always feel like it's nice to just take some cleansing breaths in through the nose

Speaker 2: 1:43

And out through the mouth.

Speaker: 1:52

Then if your feet are on the floor. I want you to really feel your feet on the floor. Yeah. Totally rest into whatever it is that you're sitting on. And I just want you to take a moment to notice that you are breathing. Notice your breath coming in through your nostrils, leaving your nostrils. And next I'd like you to notice the place in your body where you feel the breath the most strongly. So it might be that you notice it most coming in through your nose.

Speaker 2: 2:35

You notice it most moving your lungs. Your ribcage, belly,

Speaker: 2:54

pick one spot where that sensation of breath is the strongest and then bring your attention and your awareness to that spot. And as you become aware of this sensation of breathing, particularly in this one area, I'm going to invite you to bring in a mantra,

Speaker 2: 3:18

which will really just be as simple as, Breathing in, breathing out. And sometimes I like to say it twice to slow down my breath. breathing in, breathing in, breathing out, breathing out. Breathing in, breathing in. And in a moment, I'm going to give you

Speaker: 3:54

a full minute to give your mind some space to settle into that rhythm, focusing on that space in the body where the sensation of breathing is strongest,

Speaker 2: 4:06

and then just being with it. So come back to breathing in, breathing in, breathing out, breathing out. Breathing in, breathing in, breathing out, breathing out. And if you find yourself getting distracted,

Speaker: 4:35

just bring your attention and your awareness back to that space in your body.

Speaker 2: 4:40

And come back to your mantra, breathing in, breathing in, breathing out, breathing out. And yes, burps and yawns are excellent signs of shifts in the nervous system. So I'm going to give you one minute now, just follow your mantra, breathing in, breathing in, breathing out, breathing out. Good. Now I'm going to invite you to expand that awareness. To your whole body, from head to toe, simply noticing whenever something grabs your attention. So keeping eyes closed, staying in the body. You're not looking for anything, but simply waiting patiently with your breath. Waiting for a feeling

Speaker: 6:34

in your body to emerge. And thoughts will come up, and that's cool. And sensations will come up too. And when they do, I just want you to observe what you feel. And it may be useful to put a one word label on it, where in the body the sensation is occurring, so we don't create a story about it, it might just be like,

Speaker 2: 7:01

I, my knee is aching, you say knee, you notice the sensation in your stomach, you say stomach. Simply labeling where it is. And when a sensation comes up, I want you to attend to it for a few breaths, simply allowing it to be there. And then return to the spot in the body where you're focusing on breathing in, breathing in and breathing out, breathing out. And simply continue to watch your breath until another sensation pops up. And then maintain this practice of alternating between breathing and feeling sensations in the body. Bring your attention now back to that space in the body where you're breathing, breathing in, breathing in, breathing out, breathing out. And then you're going to feel the body, notice all the sensations that come up. I'm going to give you two minutes now to simply notice how your body feels. Experiencing it from head to toe. Now the next time you take a breath in, make it a big one. When you exhale, do it out your mouth.

Speaker: 10:31

And then keeping your eyes closed for the next moment, bring your awareness back to my voice,

Speaker 2: 10:38

back to the room, wiggling fingers and toes, feeling your seat on your chair, your feet on the floor. And when you feel good and ready, you can open your eyes and come back to me.

Speaker: 10:55

Alright, my darlings. It's

Speaker 2: 10:57

just one of my fave things to talk about. Self sabotage. Let's do it.

Speaker: 11:01

first, we're gonna discuss what self sabotage is. We're going to talk about the two types, why we do it, because it's wildly successful, that's why we do it. But really self sabotage is undermining our positive goals and intentions and values with conflicting actions. These are the things that I refer to as your SPBs, your self protective behaviors. The result is you maintain the status quo, right? We can say we want all the things, say we want to do all the things, but when we engage in our SPBs, we're usually entering into self sabotage and we stay. And then we get into all like, this isn't working, blah, blah, blah, blah, which is one of the ways in which self sabotage keeps us in that lower vibe state. There are two types of self sabotage. Conscious and unconscious. Conscious, you are aware in the moment that you are making choices that are in direct conflict with your intentions and values. Who has done this? You know, I know what I'm doing. I'm still doing it. Yeah, me too. And then there's unconscious self sabotage. You are unaware, you're subconsciously making choices that are undermining your intentions and values in the moment. You might realize that happens a lot in this program, right? It's like we're unconsciously doing it. Oh, I was, yeah, I have a bit of an aha moment. But we do it because it works. At some point in time, we learned to deal with situations in a way that served us in the moment. Not, you know, we, we didn't have any better skills. Usually at a young age, right? And that's how we learned to handle disappointment, fear, pain, uncertainty. Those are the things that we did to feel loved, to feel like, to feel in control, to stay safe. And to control our world and then because it worked at that time, we will continue to repeat the pattern until we've healed it at the level of the body, which is one of the reasons that, I want to practice getting into the body. Another reason that we do it is secondary gain. So we usually subconsciously are receiving a benefit of not realizing what we're doing. and doing it anyways, for example, and I absolutely have had clients who did this and realized that they do it. Remaining in victim position, so victim is when you get into it's the circumstance, this is happening to me, it's beyond my control, I can't because of this, putting up obstacles, right? So this is literally just one example, guys, but we could receive, sympathy, help, and attention in that situation. It enables us to receive additional support, or literally, I've had clients in the situation, you receive financial compensation, you don't have to take responsibility for, you know, whatever. You remain dependent. Oh, if I heal this, they win, I'm no longer in pain, there's no, or, or there's no evidence of what happened to me. So very much staying in victim position. It sounds like that would be no fun, and it's not, but there's subconsciously a reason that we continue to do it. I'd love for you guys to start to think, if you don't already know, of your self establishing behaviors, your SPBs. But here are some examples. These are just 10 common examples. It can be pretty much literally anything, right? procrastination. Perfectionism is procrastination masquerading as quality control. I love that. Because our perfectionist tendencies Will keep us in procrastination, but we just think that it's a high achiever, like positive thing, you know, but really what we're doing is delaying or avoiding what it's for our highest good. And this works really well to avoid our uncomfortable feelings. It works really well to avoid taking full responsibility for ourself and our experiences. Chronic worry gives the illusion of control and certainty when you're feeling helpless or certain. we kind of have a limiting belief that worry does something for us, but it's never productive in the long run, and almost always leads to anxiety, because it's a future thing, right? But it keeps, it works really well to keep you in a lower vibe state. Remember, our brain, our nervous system is always trying to conserve energy and keep us safe. and comfortable. And comfort is no change, right? So if you're very used to living in worry, living in anxiety, being hypervigilant, your system will literally fight to keep you there. So when I say keep you in a low vibe state, it might sound like, oh, that's ridiculous, why would anyone do that? Your body is doing it for you because it feels normal and safe. Okay, number three, judgment. Which is the ultimate mirror and deflector. This is judgment of others and of ourselves. Right, which I know a lot of us, buy into. So instead of being curious about our triggers and using them as an opportunity for growth, healing, and rising, we deflect our discomfort by judging ourselves or others. And this works really well to prevent intimacy, closeness in relationships. It holds us from having to be vulnerable. You know, if we're judging something out someone else, okay, what she's doing is stupid. I don't have to like, look at my own thing. And also keeps us in a lower vibe state. Very similar comparison. This one is pretty common and rampant, especially in my, in my high achievers here, but it's literally the thief of joy. When I say comparison, I mean to your, to others, to yourself, a previous version of yourself. I've had so many clients, particularly like in the fitness and body, space comparing themselves to a previous version of themselves. Like, a doctor told me when I was 21 that I should weigh 120. Before I had babies 10 years ago. I weighed this, like, completely irrelevant, but we do it all the time. I used to be able to X, Y, and Z, right? Not, probably no longer relevant. Negativity. Yeah, but. I have to say, I am guilty of this yeah, but. And I really only realized it recently, because I'm like, I'm a very positive person. But I noticed, catching myself, that I would be like, oh my gosh, I love this view. But, you know, like, I don't know if I'm going to have it for, and I was like, Oh, I recently just realized that I do that. And it robs you from just experiencing the joy in the moment. It robs us of that. So it's not always just being negative, saying negative things to and about yourself. It's also robbing yourself of enjoying a positive experience. And it's also focusing on what is not working. You know, in your check in, it says focus on the gain, not the gap. Focusing on the gap is a very, I'm not good enough. That's not good enough. What we're doing right now is not good enough, right? And then it can also get us into worry, catastrophizing, worst case scenario, very, very, very in our head, right? Really difficult to experience love, joy, and fulfillment when we're so in our head about kids. All the things that are not and could go wrong. Chaos and drama. I would say this is like often a subconscious one, whether it's creating your own or getting caught up in other people's chaos and drama. But it serves often as a distraction from having to take full responsibility for your own life. So, and it can look like Someone who is lacking some fulfillment, purpose, or connection can subconsciously fill that void by engaging in other people's chaos and drama. I feel like this is why Facebook exists. It's because Random people get secondary gain from chaos and drama. Substance use and abuse. So, alcohol and drug use, super, super, super common. Because it's a quick hit, right? It's like for our Friday, Saturday brain, it's a dopamine hit, it's soothing, but it doesn't allow for authentic connection with others or ourselves. When I say ourselves, and I always use the example like, if I'm doing the breathwork that we just did or I'm writing in my journal, I do not have the same, I don't receive the same DMs from my brain that I do after I've had a glass of wine as if I don't. You know what I mean? The connection is not the same. It's impossible to get into your body. Chronic lateness. I had so many ladies in my group be like, Oh my god, I totally do this. Chronic lateness is often a sign of self sabotage. It can erode your relationships and leads to a lack of trust and respect with friends and family members. I'd say people often do this unconsciously, subconsciously. Yeah, we can get a lot of secondary gain from that guy. Stress eating! I feel like we've all done this. This really should say emotional eating, of which stress eating is part of it. Because food, substances, offers a quick temporary fix, right? Works for loneliness, works for stress, anxiety, distraction. But distraction is always, we're looking usually for connection or distraction, right? And then lastly, intimacy and commitment issues. I used to be so guilty of this in my relationship, until I did this work. Intentionally abandoning or ruining otherwise healthy relationships out of fear of Honestly, sometimes I'd like being vulnerable of it getting too good. Oh, that's really uncomfortable. This can't be real. I may have to be uncomfortable or vulnerable. So it protects you from getting hurt, essentially. you had an aha moment, and that's the key, right? It's like, until we look at this, we don't necessarily know what our triggers are, and now that you know what your trigger is, it doesn't mean you're going to eliminate it tonight, but you can see it turning. You can work on it, and then you, and you can ask yourself in the moment, okay, what am I actually craving right now? It's like, I'm not uncomfortable. I'm not eating because I'm uncomfortable. I'm eating because I'm an asshole who can't stop eating. Like, that's what everyone says to me, literally. I can't, I'm an uncontrollable, like, terrible person. No, you're not. It's serving a purpose in some way. You're looking for something else. You have a stress bucket, okay? You have a window of tolerance. It is much easier to see these things coming and choose something different when your stress bucket and your window of tolerance are not full. So I'm just saying that because I think that sleep is a part of, an integral part of the flywheel for most of us. So when you're not sleeping and then there's all these circumstances, sure we can have a perspective when something shitty happens. But, every time something happens, it fills our stress bucket, and then especially if we're not practiced, or we don't have this awareness, it becomes harder to make a choice that's for our highest good. Okay. So how on earth do we remove this from our lives? Well, first of all, inviting compassion and understanding. So. Seeking to understand the purpose of it. So I think some of you are already kind of making connections, aha moments, what am I actually needing right now? I've totally been there too, that when, and I don't do this so much anymore, but I used to. When I was lonely, it was like wine and my phone. Those are my things. But really I was like, oh, I think actually I just like want to talk to somebody. Or what am I afraid of right now? So I'm not, I'm afraid of not doing it perfectly. I'm afraid of failing. I'm afraid of being vulnerable with this person and then getting hurt. I'm afraid of being uncomfortable. What if I'm sitting here by myself and I start thinking about that stupid thing I said seven years ago and then I have to like, oh, think about how stupid I am. And we're really just afraid of all the terrible things we're going to say to ourselves.

Speaker 2: 21:22

You know?

Speaker: 21:22

What is feeling uncomfortable right now? So has anyone ever successfully or other, successfully, has anyone ever successfully bypassed their self protective behavior? So like, I know, I know some of you have. I 100%, I'm pretty sure all of you have. So for example, you think about eating the thing for a long time, and then you maybe don't eat the thing. Or you don't eat all of the thing. Or you don't drink the thing. Can you relate to this? that's the uncomfortable piece. This is what I want to draw your attention to. Isn't that the most uncomfortable 20 minutes of your life? Not engaging in that behavior and having the negotiating with terrorism. if you can stay there. Oh my gosh. Why is this so uncomfortable? You can so much more frequently successfully bypass it because when we skip over it or we engage in the thing, we don't have to address it and it keeps that charge. But when you get through it, like a number of times. You build confidence and you're like, Oh yeah, this sucks right now. But There's another, there's another side over here. But once you can see that your self sabotaging habit is meeting an authentic need, so loneliness, connection, like lack of connection, fear for your safety, like if it's about money or overworking. There's an authentic something there, right? You're afraid. You're afraid of someone being mad at you. You're afraid of the terrible things you're going to say to yourself. You're afraid of failing. Like, these things are real. We're not saying these feelings and fears are not real. So let's just call it, like, let's see it happening. Oh, what am I actually needing? Oh, I'm actually, like, just really don't want this person to be mad at me, so I'm going to email them back at 2am. You know, like, that's not necessarily a healthy boundary, and we can still validate the feeling. The part of you that's doing the best that they can with the skills that they have, even if it's less than ideal Tough love and shaming does not work. I think you guys know that, that's why you're all here, because you know that we're not motivated by fear or shame, we are motivated by love and peace. so, number one is to know. What your, what your self protective behavior is. Start to identify your trigger, which is something we can talk about another day, if you guys would like. I have a whole activity for that. So you can see it coming. And then inviting compassion and understanding, like we're doing now. Okay, why is this so uncomfortable for me? Why do I feel like I need in my soul to do this and eat this thing right now? Or, like, am I feeling lonely? What's actually going on? Number one. Our nervous system is just an imprint of everything that we've experienced ever, but mostly under the age of 12. So, it is our primal, this is the protector, this is the fight or flight, the lion's coming to get you, lives. It's here. And when you're tired, you do not have this like executive function. You are only making decisions and operating from the base level, which is why we regulate the nervous system. Your prefrontal cortex, which is not finished developing until you're 21, is our center of executive decision making and control. So it is your, what I call your Sunday night, Monday morning brain when you're like regulated and you're like, I'm so tired of feeling this way. Why do I do this? Like, why did I eat all the things or whatever? When you're regulated, it's very easy to see that. But, it's like the future thinker, the future pacer. But when you're dysregulated, when you're tired, when you've already had three drinks, You're not operating from executive function. You're in like YOLO. I want the dopamine hit now. I'm a caveman. I need meat. Like you're operating from your primal brain. and that's the one that's going to talk you into it, like, maybe you're hungry. Oh, we just do have one more. It's really not a big deal. That's the conversation you're having down here when you're dysregulated. You're not thinking from this place that's like, Oh, it's not really in line with how I want to feel on a brain level. So again, so valid, makes so much sense. But can you even just start to see it as that's literally just my brain. That doesn't mean that it's true. Number two. boosting our emotional tolerance. So when I say window of tolerance, I say stress bucket, and I know this to be true because I've done it. Your window will start wherever it is now. So let's say your window of tolerance is, this is all I have, is this big. But then your, you know, boss yells at you and your kid got sick. And all these things are filling your bucket, and for a while, your stress bucket will remain the same size, because that's a skill that you have right now, so we have to use your skills to cope with the same size stress bucket. But over time, we can literally grow the bucket. You can boost your emotional tolerance. You can boost your resilience. And so whether your habit is always being in a low vibe, always feeling low, always sitting in procrastination. Or being too intense, do, do, do, do, do, hustle, hustle, hustle. Incrementally strengthening your ability to sit with the discomfort and not do anything about it, get out of fixing, is essential. Right? And then we can, this is why I'm so big on titrating. I want you to feel anxious and pull in a one minute tool. Because that's what you have the capacity for right now. And then, you know, next week we'll use a two minute tool. And you'll be able to sit with this for two minutes. Incrementally growing your tolerance. So when you feel an overwhelming emotion come on, see if you can sit with it for literally 10 seconds, and then 20 seconds, and so on. And you might pull in an affirmation, all is well in my world. It's safe for me to feel good. Fear is just an illusion. One of mine previously has been, it's safe to be present. Okay. I don't have to, I don't want to open another tab. It's actually safe to be present and do what I'm doing right now because emotions are actually just chemical surges from your limbic system that lasts for 90 seconds. They're not good. They're not bad. They're literally just like your brain be doing. Your system is doing chemical shit. That's all just information. It's the, meaning you assign to it and the story you tell after that determines how you affect it. If you guys have not seen my running of a model, circumstance be what it is. Circumstance might happen. Some guy might, I don't know why I thought of this example. Some dumb guy could run naked past my window right now. I'm gonna have an emotion about it. But then it passes or I create a whole drama about it and do a bunch of things be the emotion is real. But can you sit with it without telling a story or making it mean something? Oh, my God, I live in a terrible neighborhood. And like, why isn't my fence closed? I'm like, my child's probably doing drugs right now. Like, that's really, really getting wrapped up in a story about it. Right? Or can we just be like, Oh, this thing happened. Well, that kind of made me feel like this. Okay. And then next to a new action based on how you are wired. So we do all this self awareness work because you have to know yourself to act accordingly. And create something that's realistic and aligned for who you are. So, I'm trying to think of some examples of this, but when you force yourself to go against your wiring because you were told like, this is the right way to do it, or this is the right thing to do, I wouldn't even say it can be exhausting. I would say it is exhausting and it is soul depleting. Which is a great trigger for self sabotage, and I would say that this is why most women who I talk to and work with are exhausted, burnt out, and soul tired, is from, trying to do anything someone else's way. So, I mean, is fitness not a great example? I've been talking to you guys about ideal versus optimal. Sure, it would be ideal to Eat only whole foods, six times a day, and go to spin five times a week, and also do force strength, like, that would be great, that's not optimal for your life, and yet we still try to shove ourselves into all sorts of, routines like that anyways, don't we? I will sometimes be reluctant when clients ask for, like a morning routine because I know they're comparing it to my morning routine, which I've been working on for five years. And so I don't really want to tell you because you're going to try to shove yourself into something that I've been trying to do for at least, you know, see what I'm saying? And then it's a failure and then I'm a basket case and I can't even get a morning routine right. It becomes a whole thing. So I'm more interested in. what feels good to you like what is one to ten percent more than you're doing now, but as I'm saying this I think that this comes up a lot in health and fitness because I think there's so many shoulds and so much information and so much comparison and she's doing this and my friend is doing this and well I have the impression that it's taking her this long to do this and so I should do that. So, for one thing it causes a lot of distraction, routine hopping. Because instead of just sticking to what's working for us and doubling down on that, Oh, maybe it's faster if I do it like this, and then we never see results in any way. Or we're forcing ourselves to do something that feels absolutely terrible. and then that's a trigger for self sabotage. We engage in self sabotage, we engage in our SPBs, and then we're like, Well, fitness does not work for me. Obviously, I've just proved it because I just did all these things, right? So as I'm saying this, what do you try and force yourself to do because you think you should? What are your shoulds? That doesn't feel good. I'll give you an example. Well, I just gave you some fitness examples, but, I heard a lot about diets. My friend is doing this diet. My friend says that, like, I should be in a calorie deficit. Should I be doing cardio this many times a day? I hate cardio, but should I do more cardio? I'm losing weight, but it's not fast enough. Should I do more party hope? Even though I hate it. that kind of thing. or you know I love planner porn, so, I'll always be like to my friends, like, can I see your calendar? what does it look like? And then compare my calendar to their calendar. I don't do that anymore, but it's irrelevant. So what do you try and force yourself to do because you think you should? Fasting, cleaning the house and being perfectly organized. One of the best phrases I ever learned is, that's not for me. instead of being like, I hate that dress on you, just in my head, that's just, you know, that's just not for me. Fasting? Not for me. you can still ask others how they're taking action, and we're not making it mean anything about us and how we quote unquote should operate because there is no right way. There are just ways that are aligned for you. And then lastly, connect to your compelling reason why. Why do you want to stop your self sabotaging pattern? Is it not serving for you in some way? Or maybe it's working right now. when I first moved and I felt like an absolute gong, my actual therapist, my psychologist, because I was like, I'm doing this and I'm doing this and I'm doing this. She's like, we're just not going to worry about most of those right now. I was like, okay, so it's like, we're not going to remove all the, and I've had clients with that as well, who are trying to quit smoking and start exercising and stop being critical. And also let's just not take everything away all at once, because it's going to blow out your nervous system and then you're going to crash and then we're going to be starting from zero anyway. So, no shame for what's happening right now, but also how do you want to feel? And what would you love to experience? And why? How do you think you will feel? I just did this activity with my RISE ladies a couple hours ago, so I got them to give examples of the experience they want to have. One of them, her thing has always been, like, I want to have the mobility so that, if I stepped in my dog's pee, I can just hop to the sink on one foot, no problem. That's the experience that she wants to have, because the emotion on the other side of that is, like, Ease, contentment, no big deal. And so, what I want you to lead with is that feeling. Because how do you become the person who has that kind of mobility? It's not from telling yourself that you suck and you should work out seven times a week. It's leading with the feeling of ease, contentment, and peace. Oh, I feel like doing that mobility thing that like, helps me, my balance, or whatever. Like that feels fun. That's what motivates. Women in particular, not like you should do this and you should do this and you suck if you don't do this. So what would you love to experience? Why? What's the feeling that you think that you're going to have always focus on what you want, not what you don't want. I even forget that this is a thing. Cause you guys, I hope notice like coming into this program, having your first conversation with me, filling out your application form, I will always flip what you say into a positive. Always. And there will never be a question that's like. What do you not want? It's like, how do you want to feel? What do you want, Okay, cool. We're gonna lead with that. We're not gonna lead with I want to stop eating and I want to stop being a jerk to my children. What do you want to feel? Like that's how we get there. And then make sure that that is in line with your authentic self now. So, inviting, why am I doing this? Maybe there's a real reason, and then having some compassion for it, boosting your tolerance, sitting with it, a little longer, a little longer, getting through it. And then choosing new actions that are really, really, really, really based on you, your goals, your desires, and how you are wired. Not how, your friend Bethany is doing a fast, or, what her deck looks like, but literally, that are in line That gets you really excited, which is another reason that I'm really big on goal setting with you and doing your compelling visions. I want you to think about how you feel. Let's not spend another moment thinking about how you don't want to feel. We are very familiar with that. Let's get really excited about how you want to feel. What you would love to experience. Connect to that feeling and then lead from that place. whether it's about your health or your fitness or something else, scripting it is beautiful, Okay, this is the experience that I want to have. Write it out as if you're having it. I have the number one talk show on CBS. I don't know, I feel like that's what everyone wanted in the 90s. And then like, what will you have? Why does that matter to me, to you? How will it feel? What emotions will I have? What will be possible? What can I do for others? That's a good one for my caretakers who have trouble with self care. What can I do for others? What capacity will I have? What will I be able to give when I'm having this experience in my body or whatever? Why is it so important? And then there's your affirmations. Read that to yourself. This is who I am. Talk to yourself as if you already have it because the universe always says, yes, you'll just receive a match for whatever you are putting out. So we are embodying. Future vision of ourselves and then bringing it to life. And then we don't sit back and do nothing. We take inspired action. We bring it to life by saying it over and over and over speaking as if

Speaker 9: 34:54

All right, that's it for today's episode. I hope this gave you some powerful insight into how self sabotage shows up and more importantly, how you can break free of the cycle for good, because here's the truth. The women who see lasting, sustainable results aren't just more disciplined. They're not just more motivated. They don't just have more willpower. That's not why they're not constantly entering into self sabotage. They have learned how to work with their bodies and brains, not against them. And that is exactly what I am teaching inside Flow,

Speaker 10: 35:25

my live course designed to help you achieve more with ease so you can stop overworking, stop overthinking and start seeing real lasting results. If you're tired, spinning your wheels, feeling stuck, stressed or like you're never doing enough, flow will show you how to break free from the hustle and step into a stronger, more confident and balanced life.

Speaker 11: 35:45

Enrollment for Flow is officially open and I would love for you to join us. Head to the link in the show notes to sign up now.

Speaker 10: 35:52

And if this episode hit home for you, send me a DM on Instagram at an Jones fit that's an with an E and Jones fit. I would love to hear your biggest takeaway. Thanks for tuning in and I'll see you next week.