Why Healing Takes More Than Traditional Therapy With Becca Post

in this episode of all our parts, i’m joined by therapist + coach becca post for a bold, refreshing conversation on what it really takes to support clients in their healing journeys — beyond the limits of traditional therapy.

together, we explore:
 🧠 how becca integrates human design into therapy and coaching
✨ what it means to embrace your whole self in the healing process
💬 the power of authentic client-provider connection
🌀 her after therapy program designed to help folks move from surviving to thriving
🫂 upcoming workshops + community events focused on embodied growth

if you’re a healing girly, a self-discovery nerd, or just craving conversations that go deeper than surface-level mental health talk, this episode is your vibe.

🎧 connect with becca:

📲 Instagram

🧵 Threads

🎙️ Podcast

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

It is very rare that the algorithm does its thing, works its magic, and connects you with someone like-minded, super cool, and could potentially take over the world with you. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to All Our Parts. I am so, so excited to introduce my guest today. She is a therapist. She is a coach. She is a badass. Becca, thank you so much for joining today.

SPEAKER_01: 0:26

Thank you. It's kind of, you're right. It is kind of wild. I have not let the algorithm run it, do its thing, but this is like a soul connection of like multiple lifetimes.

SPEAKER_00: 0:38

Oh, for sure. So to even share how we met, Threads, I was like, oh, let me get on Threads. And I put out a call out for podcast guests. She responded, when I tell you our 30 minute conversation could have been a four hour cancel the day conversation. It really could have been. It is amazing to connect with someone and to be able to recognize like you are not a silo in some of the values and beliefs that you share

SPEAKER_01: 1:14

yeah and it's kind of wild too because I was also on threads like willy nilly like let's just see what happens here I don't know what this is I hated Twitter so why would I like this

SPEAKER_00: 1:24

but doesn't it give like early early Twitter like when you would just post oh eating my cereal what about you yeah

SPEAKER_01: 1:33

no it really does actually I didn't think about it that way but it really does just like oh I like Lucky Charms to you

UNKNOWN: 1:40

Bye.

SPEAKER_00: 1:42

Becca, tell us about yourself. Tell us about you.

SPEAKER_01: 1:45

Yeah. So as Jazz said, I'm a licensed clinical social worker in Utah, but I actually grew up on the East Coast. I've lived in Utah for about 10 years. And honestly, it's a wild ride living here. I'm being a therapist. I built a group private practice and starting in 2020, primo time for mental health. Right. And then as my clients were moving because their jobs changed, or life changed during the pandemic, I was like, hmm, you don't really need therapy anymore. What would it be like if we did coaching? And it blossomed into my entire after therapy kind of coaching modality and experience. And a lot of it, honestly, I've been rewriting this over and over, I think over the last month or so, because I, as a I have to convince someone why they need to heal. And it's so interesting working now in this duality of coaching and therapy because people who seek coaches don't want you to convince them to heal. They actively want to heal. Versus in therapy, sometimes it feels like I'm pulling some strings to get you. Being my first coach while still seeing a therapist and being like, wow, my life is so much more productive. It's kind of bananas. So I was like, what if I did this thing? And so I did it.

SPEAKER_00: 3:16

And you're doing it.

SPEAKER_01: 3:17

Yeah. Still showing up.

SPEAKER_00: 3:20

Yeah. So you incorporate human design into your after therapy work, right? I

SPEAKER_01: 3:25

actually incorporate it into everything. I use human design with my therapy clients. I use human design in my parenting and the daily life. I use human design and how I run my business specifically, like more in-depthly with my coaching clients for sure. And after therapy, because I think. It offers more of a concrete path and direction for people, but it's incorporated now in everything I do.

SPEAKER_00: 3:50

How did you make that leap? How did you decide human design is in tandem with the work that you wanted to do?

SPEAKER_01: 3:57

How did I make the leap to incorporate human design in everything?

SPEAKER_00: 4:01

Yes. How did you decide... human design goes in tandem with the work that you wanted to do?

SPEAKER_01: 4:07

That's a really great question. Honestly, it was so impactful for me as the receiver of it when I had my first reading and I started diving into it that I was kind of like, my world makes sense. There were just so many things about myself that I believed were broken or wrong or I needed to When I had my first human design reading, it was like, no, no, these are energetically very much part of who you are.

SPEAKER_02: 4:44

And

SPEAKER_01: 4:45

the world is telling you that they need to be different. And your family and the way that you were raised and the society that you live in was telling you that you needed to be different to fit this mold, but that's actually not what you are.

SPEAKER_02: 4:59

And

SPEAKER_01: 5:01

I took the leap incorporating it with my class. clients by finding the ones who were really stuck I'm like a big proponent of like hey I want to try this really weird thing if you hate it we never have to do it again but what if we try it and honestly the first couple of clients I implemented it with just sobbed like the entire first couple of introductions and readings for it that they were like this is life-altering and for the same reason it was for me where it was like I'm not broken I just have to figure out how to decon myself from what I believed is wrong and then I started incorporating it in my marriage because my husband and I have super different human designs and I was like oh this is why we have a lot of it is around decision making I started incorporating it in the way that I run my business and then I started incorporating it with my team because I was like I can actually lead you better I can guide you better and then when I was building after therapy it was it just became a foundation piece of helping people learn how to actually integrate their healing work which is my primary focus in after therapy is just like how do we actually like build a life now that you have knowledge of what and how you want to heal

SPEAKER_00: 6:18

and

SPEAKER_01: 6:19

human design gives like a really beautiful platform

SPEAKER_00: 6:23

as you're talking about it it brings to mind the nature versus nurture aspects that we always talk about and nurture being school our parents how we're conditioned how we are raised and then human design is the nature aspect it's like actually no you might be a hermit like you might better function in a silo creating and then when you are ready to externalize it you can externalize it but there is no perfect mold there is just your design and how you are created and this can get you back more in touch with who you're meant to be I'm

SPEAKER_01: 7:04

like This is going to be like, I'm going to give you your nature and we're going to talk about the way, all the ways the world nurtured you.

SPEAKER_00: 7:10

We did not discuss that beforehand. Just so you.

SPEAKER_01: 7:14

We, we are on this level. Yeah. It's like kind of, that was wild. I was like, wait, didn't we talk about this? Cause it's literally like, for me, I think that was so foundational, especially because like, I'm, and for those of you who are listening, maybe not familiar with human design, it's like a Eastern science that came about in the 1980s. And it was actually like the same all philosophical sciences come through some person was standing on a rock receive the information who knows I don't ever like take it totally from a spiritual lens I do it very much from like a clinical standpoint but it's combined six different eastern philosophies into one model and it was actually created so that our generation would learn how to parent their kids differently and like see that their kids were energetically very different than they were therefore you can't mold your kid it was a very different form of conscious parenting and then it started to show these ways that people could be in society and careers that would be good for them and what their gifts are and how their roles could be and like how to actually use your energy to do what you want to do in life and I think one of the things for me that I it was like mind-blowing was like when I learned about human design I was I learned I'm a 2-4 sacral generator and so I am a hermit and an opportunist which definitely aligns because I'm a Libra sun and a Capricorn moon and a Sag rising but I have never in my life if you had met me four years ago five years ago now no one in my life would ever say I was an introverted person like there was no sign at all of me being a hermit like at all until the pandemic when I was like literally forced to be a hermit right

SPEAKER_00: 9:03

and you were like I'm thriving

SPEAKER_01: 9:04

Yeah, literally in the first couple of months, I was like, I need this all off. Like we got up these things, like I'm going crazy over here, but it was mind blowing when I suddenly started to thrive because I had no outside information. I got really creative. I started building a business. I started doing all these things that I had said I would do, but because I had no outside influence, really, I was like, wow, okay, I can do these things. And now it's, I've had to learn to like, I Right. That needs this time alone. That is rather introverted. And I shine when I'm out in public and I can build community and I love networking. And if I don't retreat completely after I'm burnt out, I'm done. And so it was, it was for me that very stark contrast of like, yeah, the world wanted me to be extroverted. Like that was what was praised. That was what was good. I made friends easily. I connected with people. I can like build groups. I can build community great this is what you do right it worked well in

SPEAKER_02: 10:08

workplaces

SPEAKER_01: 10:09

on school and then suddenly it was like just kidding you actually like really like being alone but like completely alone

SPEAKER_00: 10:16

then you're like oh wait actually in order for me to be on it and here I need to like go under my weighted blanket for three days watch the same TV show and reemerge when I am ready to give that to you again but I cannot give that to you all the time

SPEAKER_01: 10:31

absolutely not which is wild because I was you to living at that high right of used to doing all those things and now I'm like sometimes I look at my schedule and I'm like I literally can't do that I was looking at my schedule in like two weeks and it's like seven I scheduled seven clients and I have like a community event after and I was like well that's not gonna work right and before I would have been like okay I'm just gonna yeah I'm gonna do it I can do it I know I can do it and I looked at it and I'm like okay I have 10 days to figure out how to fix that total 180 in the way that I learned to cope with life right

SPEAKER_00: 11:03

yeah Do you have to do it?

SPEAKER_01: 11:07

Yeah. Because it became a difference between I can do it. Do I want to do it?

SPEAKER_00: 11:13

And even noticing the difference of being able, being capable, saying I can do something versus is this going to best serve me? Is this going to best serve the other person? Like, especially as we think about client work, like, sure, I can see a people. Does seeing those eight people truly benefit them and me. never never but I'm also a hermit so I'm a 6-2 generator role model hermit

SPEAKER_02: 11:47

so

SPEAKER_00: 11:50

I like retreat like even the thought of social media for me sometimes I'm like I'm just gonna delete all of it and go so I'm like no and so it's like this constant tug where I've gotta like put yourself out there do it but I can't do it consistently like I would say right around like retrograde towards the end of it I was like if I don't take a break I'm going to delete all of these social media accounts and go hide and do something else. But I recognized it was that burnout piece. It's like, I can cultivate these relationships. I can communicate. I can present extroverted, but I cannot do that in the way that I used to because I am now aware that I'm not designed to function that way.

SPEAKER_01: 12:44

Yeah. And being a 6'2", you have those different phases of your life where you are super extroverted and then your first 30 years right you're like I'm gonna try anything I'm gonna do all these things I'm gonna do do do and then all of a sudden you turn 30 and you're like yeah I'm good like you immediately there's like this 180 that happens because you move into that internal processing because you're you're truly here to like figure out how to educate and train people and so also I think like a lot of what we've bonded over and connected through is like this how do you be authentic and hold space and in a media like sense where we're consuming things rapidly it's super oversaturated now and also like for you specifically like authenticity and like and actually like providing value is almost more important than whether or not people watch it.

SPEAKER_00: 13:36

When I think about creating content, it's like, does this add value? But then I'm like, but I also want to be authentic. And sometimes those two aren't even congruent.

SPEAKER_01: 13:49

And as a trained clinician, that is not what you're taught, right? And that is like the hardest thing mindset shift right because at least for me I know I went to grad school a couple years earlier than you and like it was like drilled in that like you don't have a social media present you don't bring in these holistic tools you do your models you do your diagnosing and like that is all you do and you are a blank slate you do not clients know nothing about you and I think The world is really changing. you were taught that doing any of that means you could potentially lose your license.

SPEAKER_00: 14:57

How did you unpack that box? Like,

SPEAKER_01: 15:00

I'm still unpacking it.

UNKNOWN: 15:02

Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 15:04

I honestly didn't use social media like very much. in my first couple of years of my business because I didn't need to. I like built my business with a full client load. I was like having referrals left and right. I mean, it was during the pandemic, right? So like people were like, help me. And so it was really easy to fill a caseload. And I would say it wasn't until... When I started after therapy, I did start like presenting on social media more and I started like testing things out and trying new things, but it was mostly just me. And then in the last year and a half, I've gotten more consistent with social media. I'm not getting on TikTok. Like, honestly, it's just because I get so overstimulated now as a new mom that I'm like, I cannot have an app. Like my husband uses TikTok to tell me what the trends are. I'll be like, what's this thing? And then he like shows me five TikToks. I'm like, okay, I'm good. I'm done. But like, It's still very hard for me to figure out how to... show up as myself and also work within my values and ethics as a clinician because that's what I'm held to and what's been really fascinating about it is like having to to navigate that with my team because I have a team of five therapists and most of them want nothing to do with social media which is fair that's like a life choice and a lot of it is because of the fear that was instilled in us like during our training of like this is wrong and you don't need to do it but in the last six months probably six months eight months we've seen like a drastic jump in referrals from social media

SPEAKER_00: 16:47

okay

SPEAKER_01: 16:48

like a drastic one and I was like this is weird this is an interesting trend and I started like thinking of like oh are people actually trying to find therapists the same way they find coaches which is they want seven points of contact with you before they choose to work with Especially if they're, and this is where I think like the key in that statement for me. So for like any clinician listening, I think the key is if they're not in crisis.

UNKNOWN: 17:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 17:15

If there isn't something that they are immediately looking to change, but rather want to figure out how to heal and move forward and explore, then they're researching the shit out of you.

SPEAKER_00: 17:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 17:27

They're looking at your LinkedIn. They're finding you on social media. They're looking at your website over and over again. They're reading your blog posts. They're reading what you're tagged in. They're attending your events. They're doing it all before they ever make that phone call.

SPEAKER_00: 17:41

I had a response to that. It's going to be a little controversial for the streets, but that also in the therapy space, we value credentialing so much. We value letters so much, so many trainings, so many CEUs, so many renewals of license, but seven points of contact have nothing to do with your credentials. so much to do with who you are as a person, especially as people of marginalized identities and people who want to be truly seen by their therapist, not have a textbook in front of them and say, oh, the textbook told me this. So this is what I can regurgitate back to you. It's like, no, they want to be seen by the person that they are working with. And they are, again, perfect point. If they are not an active crisis, they are making sure that they will be seen, understood, validated, and that they're not like that, that broach in education, that bridge in education is going to be there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 18:54

And I think that is the shift. That's like a huge shift, right. In the way that we perceive this field. And, and ironically, actually, like I have, I, when I was in graduate school, I did a, I was a group of researchers assistant because like anything to make tuition cheaper. And I actually worked for a medical school doctor and we did research on patient surveys of residents. And it was a fascinating study to me. I don't think I wasn't there when it was like completed and published and shared, but we were correlating people's perceptions of their provider based on their interactions and their likeliness to come back based on like genuine connection versus their education or what they had to offer. And like, it's even shifting there. Like a medical, like a student being like, you can call me Billy instead of Dr. Smith. A patient felt more connected too.

SPEAKER_00: 19:54

Yeah. Well, I think our ideal of healing is becoming so much more holistic. It's, and we're also addressing, which social workers crush at all the time is addressing the systemic issues Barrier the systemic challenges, how we as a system exist versus within the clinical like we are so intervention clinical therapy. How do we offer good therapy? But we aren't always taught. How do we look at a person within the system? And so. Then that's how we get really behind when people come in and they're like, a pandemic wrecked my life. And we're like, oh, you're depressed. Like, no shit. The last four years would make anyone depressed.

SPEAKER_01: 20:43

Right? Honestly, that is a phrase I've been like, I use a lot of sarcasm with my clients. But, and it's not always a great tool, bringing new clinicians listening. But if you are the right fit and it works. But I have sat in so many sessions in the last week and been like, weird, you're anxious?

SPEAKER_02: 21:00

I

SPEAKER_01: 21:01

wonder why. And also, it would truly be weird if you weren't. Like, there's something about holding the space that says, like, oh, you're depressed from a pandemic? Weird. But also, why wouldn't you be? You almost should be? It's almost more weird when you're not. And so figuring out how to stay from a systemic standpoint or even just in general, it's like... there are normal circumstances in life where you should have anxiety and you should be depressed and things should be hard. And these things that we've decided are quote unquote wrong or need to be changed or fixed. What we're not saying is like, well, what's happening like in the world around you right now that is actually highlighting what you're internally struggling with.

SPEAKER_00: 21:53

Yeah. And I think more of us are saying you have every right to feel like, I think it'd be odd if you felt any differently about some of this. And so what does that mean for therapy? What does that mean for the coaching industry and even how we show up on social media? It's that, no, actually authenticity is more valuable than maybe where you got your degree from, right?

SPEAKER_01: 22:23

And you're being a person.

SPEAKER_00: 22:24

Yeah. The ability to be a person.

SPEAKER_01: 22:26

And that is something that is very hard to train as someone who has employees. Like I know that it's very hard to train out like the rigidness and the boundaries and the fear. And I've always been more likely to self-disclose. But part of that is because I was clinically trained in a model of therapy. Like my major clinical practicum was in this form of therapy called feminist multicultural therapy, where like the founding belief is the person is political. Right. And so like you can't I was trained very early on like I can't take myself out of the context like can't and because I was like having to like work at a clinic where I was a white woman like primarily working with marginalized populations like I had to own and like learn how to like say like I don't know and like this is my perception of the world and like I know this about myself like I had to take more responsibility and I think a lot of clinical training involves and so I got more comfortable with self-disclosure but honestly for me showing up really authentically didn't happen until I got pregnant and I had hyperemesis for my pregnancy. And so like I had every intention of not telling my clients until I was like 20 weeks and then they would have like 20 more weeks, yada, yada, yada. But I ended up having to like regularly reach out to my clients to be like, I'm literally sitting on the bathroom floor throwing up. I will not be able to attend our session. I am so sorry. I will send you new times to reschedule. And I had to trust that they could hold that and still want to work with me like that vulnerability for me of admitting like this is what's happening in my life right now

SPEAKER_00: 24:03

yeah

SPEAKER_01: 24:04

and knowing that like my clients are like invested in my son's life like I can't my son turns two at the end of the month and they're like I can't believe he's two I remember when you were pregnant right and like that's not something we were taught in therapy at school like at first I was like why do you care about my kid like you're not even supposed you're quote-unquote not supposed to know about my kid and now you're asking to see pictures of my which I don't do with every client to be but like they'll ask because I didn't have a choice but to admit what was actually happening I mean I could have just pretended but then what is that doing therapeutically for the relationship if I'm not showing up authentically and I'm not showing up in my messy humanness and telling you what's going on in my life in the in a vague sense then how can I expect you to do the same like how can I expect you to call me when you can't show up to a session and say I'm I have to take my grandma to the hospital. She fell and broke her leg. I'm sorry this is late. And then I get to decide, do I charge you the cancellation or not? but I'm not actually demonstrating how I'm teaching you to take care of yourself.

SPEAKER_00: 25:10

Yeah. And cancellation fees is its own. I don't think for another, another day, but it's so, I mean, I like hear you in person me and I'm going to distinguish person me and clinician me and trained me person me is like, yes, 100%, 1000%. And then my training my school was largely psychodynamic

SPEAKER_02: 25:38

and

SPEAKER_00: 25:39

he they didn't even teach self-disclosure he was like you shouldn't be doing it so he didn't even teach it so I hear that and I'm like I will like text or email my clients and say oh sick and I'm like having anxiety that their world's gonna fall apart and I'm like they will be okay like everyone will be okay like especially depending on the level of care that you're offering it's like people like everyone's lives are moving forward and having that open communication and having that plan it actually builds the trust more because I would rather know that my therapist just not feeling well versus oh not showing this vague cryptic hey need to cancel sending you new times now like that actually really supported my therapist and I's dynamic when she was more transparent about hey like I'm just really not feeling well today I can do this does that work for you and I'm like absolutely take care of yourself I want that for you as a client and and then in the clinician see I can show up I I am able. That sentiment might not be shared. But if you truly believe in the relationship, then all of these things get to exist.

SPEAKER_01: 27:10

And I think that's where I've really explored parts work, right? Because there's the part of me that was the trained clinician that knows transparency, social media, all these things are not okay. There's the part of me that as a client and as a consumer of coaching and therapy, I'm like, no, I'd rather you tell me what's going on because it makes it easier. So like when my My therapist is like, yep, I'm at the urgent care. I think I have COVID. I'll text you some new times. I'm like, okay, cool. I can wait. Right. And I'm like, okay, great. But then there's also like the business owner side where it's like the distrust in like the system. And because those other two parts of me are kind of always at war of like, I should be transparent, but I shouldn't. And then like, are people going to want to continue to work with me if I'm too much this way? my therapy clients like following me and seeing what I have to share and not feeling like what who I am in that space is the same as who I am in the room with them which isn't necessarily feedback that I've received it's actually been the opposite like at one point I tried to hire out like this is totally random but I tried to hire out like at postpartum like having someone do my emails and content and social and my clients actually were the ones that were like this doesn't sound like you oh like this isn't you like why are you doing this my clients see me they know how I sound they know how I feel they know what they're getting when they work with me and then to be told that what they're experiencing is not that is like my fear of like the presence of showing up in a in a marketing way right or in a networking way or even in a leadership way or even doing presentations or like conversations right is just like I don't want to be different but my parts get in the way because I feel like I should be or I have to be in order to be the perfect therapist or the perfect coach and then I get really limited and that's I mean even circling all the way back like that's how human design has really helped me really evolve is like I'm a generator and but my chart is very open like I only have three defined centers all in my like root and so like when I saw my human design chart for the first time I was like oh this is why I'm never consistent right like this is why I'm so overwhelmed with other people's stuff this is why I'm an empath this is why like all these things where I was like oh you want me to like be this person over here and this person over here and this person over here I actually like am not designed to do that and that was really helpful but that doesn't take away the years of conditioning

SPEAKER_02: 29:58

yeah

SPEAKER_01: 29:59

to show up in this space and to be that way or to feel like I have to be

SPEAKER_00: 30:04

yeah I also only have four defined centers so they're open open territory and it's wild especially as a teenager it was wild I was like okay this has gotta it all makes sense now but teenage me did not get it but what you're also speaking to is with those seven points of contact if someone's working with you in session and let's say you're psychodynamic closed face like ready to ready to go and then they see you on socials and they find your podcast and then they find they go to a community event and they're like wait I want that person who is this person that I sit with every week I want this person and then what does that congruence what does that authenticity look like and again as we've discussed before I think we are shifting into a space where people are like, we need some, no one's looking for the holier than thou therapist. People are looking for like the person because people's stuff is messy and people want to know that their messy is not going to be judged or looked at differently.

SPEAKER_01: 31:23

And that you're messy. You're a human. We're a soul having a human experience if that's what you believe. And life is messy. Things are messy. Especially because I've had clients now that have been with me since I graduated graduate school. And again, graduate school was like, that should never happen. And it's like six, seven years later and I'm like, they're still here. They won't leave. And they've had multiple iterations of me like so many iterations because i've had them follow me from job to job i've had them be with me when i've built my practice i've had them be with me when i've built this after therapy program i've had them move from therapy to coach like they've had so many iterations with me and the feedback that i consistently get is you constantly being in pivot or or having these different iterations allows me to know that i can have them too

SPEAKER_00: 32:19

it is okay to change

SPEAKER_01: 32:23

And it's okay for people to want to change with you. Yeah. And it's also okay if they don't.

SPEAKER_00: 32:31

Well, folks, I don't. She just dropped the mic and let us know. Yeah, it is okay to change and is okay if people don't want to change. And then that shouldn't stop. Which, again, our training, what we learn is that we need to stay this thing to serve the people, the masses. And I don't think we hear enough that it's okay that we're not the therapist, the coach for everyone. Oh, yeah. And we can't be. And we...

SPEAKER_01: 33:13

It's not even that you can't be. It's that you shouldn't be. Like, I have a firm, firm... Like, that could be a whole other podcast episode. But I have, like, a whole firm belief that you should not be. Yeah. And and like that really, really needs to be OK. Like I should not be the coach for everyone. I should not be the therapist for everyone. I'm not the boss for everyone. Like I'm when I'm hiring people, I'm like very transparent. I'm like, if you are looking for these seven things, it's I'm not that person. And like. that's okay I don't need you to like me I don't need I don't need you you can value what I do and as a business and I'm not the person to lead you and that's okay does that always like do I occasionally have panic attacks and like have to take a Xanax and like still stress about those things absolutely I'm doing it right now it's part of not sleeping but at the same time over the years I've gotten to the place of like it's okay and it's also still okay that it makes me up set where it makes me anxious when a client doesn't want to work with me anymore. I do feel like I came from a corporate world and I was in sales for a long time, always in the customer service position since I was 16. Your job in those positions is to like get people to come back, like to keep working with you like indefinitely. And in these fields, your job is to work yourself out of a job. And that's ass backwards from the way that we live as a society and the way that marketing works and the way that people and things work right is that like my job is actually to make you not need me anymore

SPEAKER_00: 34:46

and

SPEAKER_01: 34:48

like we don't teach people how to actually tolerate that

SPEAKER_00: 34:51

and as therapy as coaching continues to evolve we become natural parts of people's support systems and then therefore the services need to reflect that like not everyone needs therapy not everyone should be in therapy allowing the masses to be able to make informed choices about the kind of care they receive or what they truly need from an objective non-judgmental bias because everyone needs that person everyone like can benefit from having an observant third party that is holding that space for them that is sharing that space with them and it is theirs it is their it is their their container That's what I, is their container, it is theirs. And that looks different for everyone. Again, what are we conditioned? 50, 45 minute, 50 minute container. Do not talk to me outside of that container. Do not look for me outside of that container. And it's like, and... How people need support is so different, and it actually even goes against communal aspects of who we are as people.

SPEAKER_01: 36:20

And that's a big reason, like, for me, building after therapy has been... is such a part of like my own story of being in and out of therapy for like I started therapy when I was like nine years old and like in and out and in and out and like I was always told I was so anxious and my eating disorder was because I was anxious and if I just stopped being anxious my life would be so different right like so much of it was about me feeling too much and being anxious and these things that were like if you just change this about you but because I spent so so much time processing it and analyzing it and figuring out where it came from and doing all these things that the first time I hired a coach and she was like okay you're anxious and she's like no it's not like what are you doing day to day to manage it like what does it look like for you to know that you're anxious and then adjust your day for it and I was like you can do that and she was like why couldn't you do that and I was like I just thought I had to learn how to survive And so for me, the separation has become like... After therapy in my world and the coaching aspect of it is like, let's, therapy is for healing. Let's heal. Let's start it. Let's do it. But then after therapy is where we thrive. It's like, how do I figure out how to build a life? How do I figure out to be in my life? How do I figure out how to be present? Because for me as like the person who felt so much shame, because I would consistently end up in a therapist chair being like, I know why I'm here. I know all the things. I know all the stories. I know my trauma. I understand. how do i live with all of these things that are just aspects of my story yeah and then what's wild now is like watching it all fall that shit come back up as a parent right because that's what children are designed for and you're just kind of like but i have tools now so like even before we hopped on and recorded this i was like i've gotten like 10 hours of sleep in two days right and i'm exhausted and i'm probably a little manicky i'm drinking caffeine now it's a I can still live my life because my anxiety is not me. And I didn't learn how to separate that until someone was like, you don't have to just do and suffer. You can adjust and change. And that's okay. And I was like, oh. And then so many of my clients, like even from my early years in private practice, were just these clients who had been in therapy on and off for decades. And I was like, what are we all missing? Yeah. Like, what are we all missing? And it's like the place to say like, okay, what happens now? Like, oh, usually it's like, okay, you graduate from therapy. Bye. And then you feel like your therapist is breaking up with you. Cause that happened to me a few times where I was like, you just dumped me. The straight of what it felt like. I literally was like, I think you abandoned me. And then I didn't want to go back right after I quote unquote graduated because she was like, you're done. Like, let's take space. And I was like, I don't know because I need that reflection space. I need a space where someone understands Yeah. But we don't have to go back. We don't have to do all the things back there.

SPEAKER_00: 40:24

Yeah. I mean, what you just spoke to is therapy is unpacking the backpack. It is taking all of it out. Then what? Now what do I, and then a coach can say, yeah, I see all the stuff like you've taken out of the backpack. So what does that look like going forward? What does that look like to take that with you and be able to not just survive, not just live your day to day, but thrive to like truly enjoy your life. And therapy does not, therapists are not always trained to offer that space.

SPEAKER_01: 41:02

And I've even been playing with the term with my like clients specifically of like, okay, surviving and thriving is like a really hip, cool thing right now. I have clients come in all the time and they're like, I'm just in my survival mode. I'm not thriving. Like I'm just surviving. And I'm like, I want to know when you feel alive. Like to me, surviving is still an, or thriving is still an action. I'm still working towards something. And I want to know, when are you just alive? And we've been playing with the term aliveful. Like, when am I just full of life that I'm okay? Just being. Just straight up being. I'm not actually trying to do anything. I'm not trying to survive. I'm not trying to thrive. I'm not trying to get anywhere. I'm just here. Being. In my life. As present as I can on every day because every day is different. But I'm just here. I

SPEAKER_00: 41:56

think this is a wonderful place to wrap up also because if we go into another tangent, that would be another hour. Which I'm okay with, but... Becca, how can people find you? How can people work with you?

SPEAKER_01: 42:09

People can find me on social media, on Instagram and threads. We also do the Pinterest, but that's just because... I love Pinterest. I'm like a Pinterest nerd. You can find me on Pinterest regularly. But forwardhealing.co. And that is the Instagram and threads for like our therapy practice if you're in Utah. Currently, we only see clients in Utah for therapy. And then for after therapy, I work with clients all over. I do everything in three-month containers. You can learn more about that on our Instagram. You can DM me and we can ask questions and chat. We do offer a bunch of virtual workshops and different community events. And so hopefully, I'll get to know some people. and help you figure out how to be alive.

SPEAKER_00: 42:49

We've got a community event coming up, right?

SPEAKER_01: 42:52

Yeah. I think we're going to do a virtual one, but I'm not sure how to do it yet. We have a couple of community events. I have my self-help book club coming up, which is reading a self-help book for eight weeks, people. You also don't have to finish it. I did not finish our last book, to be fair. We read a book for eight weeks. I drop prompts every week for you to actually reflect and integrate and process it. Then at the end, we come together and we chat out about it either virtually or in person if you're here in Utah we're doing a friend networking event because social prescribing has become my MO and I don't know how to make friends and neither do other people and so we are taking the discomfort out of it and giving you a place to practice meeting new people and then I do every three months I do a seasonal reset workshop virtually and that'll be on October 6th and that's to set yourself up to actually adjust your life for season changes all

SPEAKER_00: 43:51

of this will be linked in the description of this episode and bye everybody