How to Grow on LinkedIn Without Posting “Hot Takes” with Dr. Monica Band

In this episode, Jazz sits down with Dr. Monica P Band—aka “The Mindful Healer”—to talk about why she chose LinkedIn as her primary platform, how long-form writing gives her room for nuance, and why LinkedIn feels “safer” than more aesthetic-driven spaces like Instagram. Dr. Band shares how she uses LinkedIn like a professional diary for therapists, why she avoids reactionary posting, and how thoughtful comment culture has helped her build community without needing video or curated visuals. 

They unpack the pressure of being perceived online (especially as a practicing therapist with clients who may follow), the value of choosing one or two primary platforms instead of trying to do everything, and how creating for personal fulfillment—not consumption—can be more sustainable. The conversation also centers on visibility as a healing practice, including cultural messages about humility, invisibility, and code-switching, and how being a “whole person” can support burnout prevention. Dr. Band also shares that she has finished writing and submitted a book proposal inspired in part by grief after losing her dog, Ember. Drawing from her academic background, she’s working on a more accessible guide for multicultural people to embrace their full selves, validate lived experiences like discrimination and intergenerational trauma, and navigate depth, safety, and connection—especially in intercultural relationships. L

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Are you sitting with thousands of hours of B-roll content and telling yourself, I'll start posting tomorrow? Are you in your head worrying about your friends and family thinking your friends producing to be visible? Are you chasing friends instead of building influence? Welcome to the visibility standard where the visionaries of today are changing the roles of their industry and letting their voice be heard. I'm your host, Jasmine, and we are setting the standard. I'm so excited for my guest today, everyone. She is a powerful voice over on LinkedIn, which I think is such a unique space to choose to create and choose to be vocal. Nonetheless, she does it. She does it with class. I'm so excited to have Dr. Monica P. Band. Thank you so much for joining me today.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

I I appreciate the sentiment about doing it with class because when I think about social media, I think about it being the most chaotic, messiest of spaces where people are just yeah, feral and not like themselves. So thank you. If I could add a little bit of class to this, to the noise that is social media, I am, I feel like I've accomplished something.

SPEAKER_01 1:18

Well, I feel like LinkedIn is just one of the least feral spaces. So just to get us started, why did you choose LinkedIn?

SPEAKER_00 1:27

I know I think like, okay, so I'm a millennial. I remember when Facebook came out. I remember the days when it was only for college students. I remember growing up with Facebook and not much more. I remember when Vines came in and out. I remember when Instagram came out. So all these things. I always looked at Facebook as like this utility to connect with friends, right? As as most of us did. And even before that, MySpace. I was like sort of the tail end of MySpace days. And then I only so I used Facebook to connect with friends. And then I used Instagram when it came out. I dabbled in a little bit of selfie stuff, but I think for the most in taking pictures of food, but I think for the most part, it was really just entertain sheer entertainment and like ways to send funny reels to people. And I never really considered it a platform for substance. And I think that's changed, by the way. So I don't hold this stance now. But I think when you ask me like why, why and how did I get to Linton, I think at the time that's just sort of my rigid association and how I personally used Instagram at the time. And I don't have TikTok. So I think like that's the other thing. And the reason I don't is not for any politicized or fancy, deep reason. It's really just I don't, I don't want another app on my phone to take my attention. It's already so short. So so for all those reasons. LinkedIn, I think, offered me a space where it didn't cap me off at a certain amount of characters or word limit, which say like Twitter now X does. And so I really needed something that just felt right, like Goldilocks, like right in the middle of like I didn't, I couldn't condense my my response just like this response now in like two sentences. I had to like find a way that I could storytell a little bit, that I could share my thoughts, that I didn't feel pressured to lose substance with something pithy or sort of like, you know, I like long-form content, I gravitate towards long-form content. I use LinkedIn as sort of my professional diary and like a place to dump a lot of my thoughts about the profession we're in. And we share it from my notes app to somewhere else that I'm like, I can't be the only person who thinks and feels this way. And so for all those reasons, I was like, well, most of my thoughts center around my professional identity and how that intersects because I think that's very unique for therapists. And then the next piece being like, well, just at the time I created all of that, it was all the other options I had just didn't feel like the right fit for all the reasons I just mentioned.

SPEAKER_01 4:21

All right, that's no, that makes so much sense. I think that Instagram only in the last two years is turning more into a space where people are really trying to blend substance and aesthetic. And so as we're seeing therapists and wellness and entrepreneurs kind of gravitate towards that space and figure out that landscape, LinkedIn has always been a space for long-form thoughts. It's been a space for professional identities to evolve, to grow, and to share different thoughts about the profession. And I I think only well, I'll get your take. I feel like as social media has grown in more professional discourse, I think LinkedIn has also evolved into more of a social media platform versus a job finding platform.

SPEAKER_00 5:20

I you mentioned something about the word aesthetic. And I find that really interesting because one of the things that turns me off a bit about Instagram, and I'm here for you to prove me wrong, by the way. I want you to be like, that's not that's not how I see it. I think when I started deciding like what feels like the most authentic platform for me to share, I there's a part of myself that really just was really anxious about this aesthetic piece that I like, I don't mind taking pictures of myself or sharing now and then, but it is not my first order thought of like setting up the camera, editing things. I get no joy from curating content in that way. And so I think there's something about the pressure. It's probably really just it's my own stuff. It's like my perceived pressure that I have to look a certain way or show up a certain way, or perhaps want to show up a certain way that I don't know is attainable. And I'm not over that yet. I haven't quite figured that out. So I think there's also this added pressure and as a result, reluctance to engage with like IG or any of these like video content, like video content or spaces like that. Like I'd I'd rather be in my comfies, you know, with a messy bun and no makeup. And maybe that is how I show up on Instagram one of these days, but like, yeah, and I don't want to have to worry too much about my aesthetic.

SPEAKER_01 6:52

Yeah. That's a huge hurdle that all of us navigate, even myself included. Like when I think about posting on Instagram, when I decided to make Instagram like my primary platform, I recognized, okay, while I work from home, I'm gonna have to get nicer a little bit. Every once in a while, I'm gonna have to put on some lighter makeup, or sometimes getting over the hurdle. I did decide, okay, you know what? I'm in my sweatpants. I don't feel like changing, but I do want to film, so I'm gonna show up as I am. That's why a lot of people appreciate TikTok because that is where that authentic storytelling mostly grew from, is a lot of people are finding more organic creativity on TikTok. People laying in bed, like, this is what I'm doing today, take it or leave it, versus Instagram. There's the curated carousel posts, there's the static with the right lighting, and then with Instagram, you've got to hit the right angles. So many folks think about that stuff and and still like push past it. And I even find myself thinking about okay, what's what do I want to present today? What do I present this week? And it's a pro and con of being in that space and choosing to deliver content over there versus LinkedIn, you do get to you get to wake up and dump your thoughts out, and you get to edit them, and you get to, you don't have to worry about how you look, and you don't have to worry about there is a a level of separation too, I think that comes with LinkedIn of of being perceived. It it's very focused on the words, it's focused on the substance versus Instagram. There are so many things that people can make assumptions about you. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:53

I think you have struck a beautiful balance. I've seen some of this, even though I'm not on TikTok, but you're convincing me now because like maybe that's the space. But I have seen, I have seen um your content and I can see how you are. I don't know if like making peace is the right phrase for that, but I think like there is a way forward where you can balance both, where you can show up authentically, share what you need to with depth, with thought, and it'd be just that, right? And I and that is maybe not to that point about sort of the evolution of how I maybe rigidly sometimes associate certain platforms or social media. That's not what it needs to be, that's not what it is right now. There was something else I wanted to mention in that. I think, yes, the word safer came up for me when you started sharing that about sort of it being a removed, because as a practicing therapist, I think about the ways in which my clients or potential clients or whomever. And I do know some clients. I mean, my my profiles are public, so anyone can follow me. And I know some of my clients do, former or current, and that's absolutely fine for any of those of you who are listening. But I I do I'm very thoughtful about that as well. I it's something I think about when I am posting. Do I necessarily want to show up a certain way, knowing that that next session a client might bring it up? Right. I don't, I don't, and I mean, all that speculation. It could be, it could go so many different routes, but I I think going back to maybe the original word that I brought up about like, yeah, there's something about LinkedIn that feels also safer for me, and be in in that sort of detachment of being able to share what I need to, ask questions, and I've more I've on the whole received really engaging comments in a way that I haven't found or even were witness to when I when I see other therapists show up on different profiles. So I'm encouraged by that and the community it starts to foster. And so I think for those reasons too, I I've really gravitated towards LinkedIn to go back to the original question. I also love your word, if I can just add one more comment here. I love your word about primary social media because I do think there's a lot of therapists who follow other therapists or other professionals, and they're thinking, oh, I want to do that, or but it feels all overwhelming. And I know I did at one point feel like, oh, do I have to do all these things and juggle all these things? And the truth is no, right? In the conversation we're having now, that there's this primary, you know, space that you put your energy and your creativity into, and through that can channel others, right? Like I had recently started a Substack, and I know other people who have as well. Or to your point, like maybe the things that you primarily share are more long form, but then you have sound bites or clips and like other spaces, all of that can overlap. This is your primary social media platform. That way anyone hearing this can say, okay, it I don't have to do all the things and be overwhelmed by all the things because that can feel like time and energy draining.

SPEAKER_01 12:08

I've tried all of them. I think in this day and age, when we think about marketing, especially as therapists have shifted into private pay and we're offering other services, you feel like you need to maximize your efforts and reach as many folks as you can. I what I've learned is that honing in on one or two is so much more impactful than spreading yourself too thin and having subpar content everywhere else. And something that really struck me with your LinkedIn, I know I used the word like a level of separation earlier, but you've managed to build resonance with so many of your posts. Like people read your content and they resonate and they respond in such thoughtful ways. And your ability to tell a story with in that space, it's not just you know, dropping points about the profession or offering advice or feedback, like there is a story and all of it, there is a larger concept that people get to resonate with, and the ability to be able to do that without necessarily having a face or a video to the language is so powerful.

SPEAKER_00 13:24

I've never thought about it that way, to be honest. And so I'm like just absorbing all of it and sitting in some really nice, nice what I I feel are just really nice compliments. I there's a few things that come to mind in doing that. If that is if that's what people are gravitating towards, it's incredible that you are perceiving it that way, you know. And the reason I say that, I'm a little fumbly for my words, is when I'm just feeling it, I'm just taken back by by just the kindness. The next piece is that I didn't start LinkedIn for anyone else but me. And I think that's the interesting part. So when I hear you say, like, oh, it has such emotional resonance, and you're I yes, I believe you because you I even if I denied it for myself and brushed away a compliment, I have seen people return to it. I've had people in the comments say, Hey, last week you said this, or I thought about that. Like, so I know that to be true, but it's still just amazing, and I'm still taking it all in because that is not that was never my intention, Jazz. My intention was actually like I was really just having both as a therapist and and also someone who supervises people, I was just having so many feelings and thoughts. And to my earlier sort of question to the void of like, I can't be the only one. I realized that I, if you were to follow me on LinkedIn, if you don't already, I always start off my post by saying therapists, because that's that's who I'm talking to and that's who I want to talk to. And I'm very specific about that, and maybe that offers some of that universality you're sharing, but I'm speechless. I don't even have like the right words to convey any sort of special formula or thought. I wish I was more thoughtful by saying, like, yes, I planned this whole thing. This is how it happened. There was this amazing strategy, marketing strategy, and somehow I figured it out. Girl, I got none of that. In fact, I think I'm just like, you know what? The same issues keep coming up in supervision or in therapy or for myself, and I need to normalize this for people. I need to find community for myself, like selfishly. Like I hope other people are out there because that's a form of validation for me who feel that way or think these things. And yeah, I never it proves that like long form content's not dead. I don't know. I I know we all love a good quick quick piece of advice or lysing goal, which I love. But I'm also like, uh, you know, being reflective isn't dead on social media.

SPEAKER_01 16:14

Absolutely not. That's why I love podcasting so much. It's Instagram's my primary like short form, but I love podcasting because you can offer such nuanced, thoughtful takes. And I think where social media becomes challenging is sometimes we're always looking for a soundbite, and sometimes we rush a thought. We rush adding uh a take to a conversation because we want that soundbite, because that that's what drives conversation versus with long form content, it also allows conversation, but it's more thoughtful. You are able to address multiple points, you're able to sit with things longer, you're able to marinate on the idea versus having this rushed response. Because even with short form, I think if the post elicits a certain feeling, there is a rushed response that comes with it because the soundbite was only 30 seconds versus the 20 minutes that that thought was able to come from. I think a lot of your posts elicit the feeling that like there's not one right answer, at least when I read them. And that's such an important point, even in clinical supervision, too, is the hope is that there isn't one right answer. I'm thinking about your post about deciding on private practice or going into a group practice. It's like, okay, how much do you want to think about work? How much do you want to focus on marketing? What are your values as a professional? And reading that, I was like, wow. Such an open-ended way to think about what the right journey is for somebody, because a lot of us think private practice equals flexibility, autonomy, freedom, and it does. And I find myself thinking about work 24-7, and and that's the trade-off that I'm willing to take, but that might not be for everyone else, but one isn't better or the right fit than more than the other one.

SPEAKER_00 18:31

Yes, I think it's so freeing to not have to embody this expert person in so many different ways. And up to that point, yeah, I don't write anything I post, I'm glad you picked up on that because that if there was one takeaway, maybe top three, that would be on the list because I am never proclaiming that I know all the answers, that you need to listen to me because this is the right way to do it, or because I've done it, I'm gonna sell you something. I respect the hustle. But I'm just saying, like, yeah, I I so that's very freeing in of itself. And that has opened up then the space for me to be more creative or ask more or ask difficult questions because I'm not beholden to the outcome. Like, I'm not beholden to it, me being right or it being right. It really is just like, therapists, what do we think? And here's what I think, and like that's it. I the next piece, and maybe you're picking up on it even in the way that I process information in real time, that I am not a reactionary person. I I have to like so me reacting in real time, even in a podcast, you can hear me like, I'm trying, I'm an introverted person, self-proclaimed introvert. So I have I process information out loud as I go. And so, like, one thing that LinkedIn has also allowed me to do, maybe my fellow introverts agree, is that I I can like write something and then rewrite something and write something again. And it doesn't feel like I need to just post something because I'm reacting to something in the news or re-re-post something someone else said to then respond in this, I don't know, activating way because I feel defensive about something. I yeah, so I I certainly don't take that stance. And then yeah, there are it's been really great to see different perspectives show up on in the comment section. I think sometimes what I have witnessed is sort of a bystander to other I like hearing other people's thoughts and and perspectives on things. And I really appreciated that for whatever reason, people have been willing to show up on the comment threads, sharing their perspectives. And for the most part, I'd say like 98% of the time, like they're just sharing their perspectives and they're not sniping at anyone, they're not being rude or mean. I mean, I know there's always exceptions to the rules or how we interpret written word, but I think like I have found for the most part, it's been really reflective and responsive rather than reactive. And that's been really nice. It's made me feel like, okay, this is the space for me, and it feeds upon itself because then that makes me feel like I can continue to share and it being again a safe place. I feel yeah, really glad to have found that. I don't know.

unknown 21:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

I think what you speak to, you know, Justin, as you talk about your journey with LinkedIn and how you talk about it, is the intention behind it. The intention behind the creativity and how that's offered you the freedom and space to show up. I think when we create, even on social media, when we create from a place of wanting it to be consumed, there is an added pressure that it needs to be perfect, that it needs to be right, that it needs to look uh a certain way. But I have found that when people choose to create simply because they enjoy Creating simply because they love sharing their ideas and it offers them personal fulfillment, it's more sustainable. And I want to reiterate that point is it's so much more sustainable when you enjoy it versus doing it for an external factor. I think as even with my own social media journey, the external opportunities that I've come with it, the external validation or community building, that have those have been added bonuses to being able to share my journey as a therapist and a podcast host. But your your desire, you know, to put yourself out there for yourself and then whoever joins, joins is so freeing. And to not want to be the expert, that that was part of why I chose to rebrand the podcast was because the the name felt it gave such weight to my identity as a therapist. And that started to feel really heavy to carry. And I wanted to give myself the freedom and the flexibility to talk, talk from a more nuanced place as a person to be able to have these conversations about therapy or about visibility, about marketing as a as a business owner and a therapist, and creating the funnel to do that. It has allowed like so much more freedom in my creativity. And so when we think about creating, when we think about putting things out there, it always comes back to intention.

SPEAKER_00 23:34

I love the rebrand, particularly the word visibility, because I think that it feels I feel emboldened and hearing it. There's a sense of power in that, and that hasn't always felt the case culturally when I think about visibility or being invisible. I first I think that that dichotomy is quite universal, but I I think, you know, but I think even more so, I let me step back before I go on this tangent about visibility because I want to hear your thoughts on it and your rebrand. So I founded this group of Asian therapists in private practice, and we get together once a month, and it's been wonderful. And one of the themes that comes up, whether it's implicitly or explicitly, we named it this past month, but when we think about the messages we received about being visible culturally, and again, not that we're a monolith, it's not everyone's experience, but I'll say most of us have such a negative connotation or hesitation towards claiming visibility. And I think it has a lot to do with not wanting to be perceived as prideful. We want to be humble because that's what's pro-social, and there's other intersections there with gender as well. But like I think, like for the most part, many of us are taught to stay humble, to not rock the boat, to not speak up, to not share because we don't know how other people feel about that. And so people who are very socially conscious, and again, that's not Asian folks don't only claim that, right? But like, you know, people who are socially conscious can I think relate to that theme of well, that's just another framing of being invisible, and that can be protective and that could be our choice, and then also that that can feel like very socially conditioned for us. Now you step into visibility, which is what you and I are talking about through social media or through our professions and leveraging that visibility to share a message or to create impact or to create sustainable connection and profit in different ways, financial or otherwise, like that feel can feel really unnatural. I know F does for me and does for my sense of um does still for the reasons I just talked about and not choosing IG or other platforms that offer too much visibility and Instagram feels safer in some contexts, right? So I think that is so resonant, the the theme of visibility. And I'm so curious for you what your relationship had like was and has is now, I should say, to visibility.

SPEAKER_01 26:15

Terrifying. I was so afraid of being seen when I first started my podcast and maybe recorded one episode a month because the thought of having an opinion out there, especially while I was still in grad school. And if you are a therapist listening to this, then you know the challenges that come with being in a clinical mental health or therapist program at times. The thought of even building an identity separate from that was really scary. And so using my Instagram was all was part of like the healing process of being able to step out as a professional, as a therapist, as a person, and then started to build this community of people who were also being visible and exploring what that meant for themselves. And so it gave me a little bit more courage to post more and to share more. And then I started getting feedback about how some of what I was sharing was resonating, and that meant so much to me because I imposter syndrome, honestly. I was like, I don't know who I'm gonna reach, I don't know if this will resonate with anybody, but I'm just kind of putting it out there and uh unaware of my own impact when I decided to switch, and I think that my visibility journey is reflective in the name. So when I chose all our parts, it was how do I blend all of who I am? How do I blend being a therapist wanting to maybe have conversations publicly? How do I blend being a black woman in this space? How do I blend being someone who may has learned to just sit, to to maybe choose silence at times, to not have the boldest opinion? How do I blend all of those things and encourage other people to share those parts of themselves too and share their stories to now visibility is the standard, it's an aspect of healing. It's what's allowed me the space to show up more present in my clinical work. It's allowed the space for me to feel like a whole person. And it's actually helped with like burnout prevention. So when we think about what would the this the tools for self-care for being a therapist and being visible, allowing myself to be a whole person has prevented burnout full stop. I actually felt the most exhausted with clinical work when I took a break from podcasting because those conversations with professionals, with peers, just being able to have those conversations and not being in the helping seat. I didn't realize impacted my day so much. And in my mind, I thought it was just something else I was adding to my plate. But when I took it away, it was a core part of me allowing myself to really flesh out concepts maybe that were coming up for me personally that weren't necessarily relevant in the clinical space or ideas that I want to gauge from another peer. And so the visibility standard is like being visible is a is a standard. It's it is one that all of us to a degree, if we allow ourselves and give ourselves that permission to be seen, if anything, we're giving ourselves space to be whole.

SPEAKER_00 30:12

Okay. I think that's so revolutionary. And the reason I say that is because it sounds it's counterintuitive. So most therapists, supervisees, helping professionals in general, I'll even extend it that far out, will believe you just gotta compartmentalize. Put your experiences in little boxes, put them away, return to them when you need to. I love a good containment exercise for my trauma therapist, but like that, that in of itself is there's containment and compartmentalization. And of course, there's gradients of how healthy or when how appropriate those things are. But what you're talking about in sort of like this idea of your self-concept and and how much of that do you want to put away, and how much are you thoughtfully putting away, is really interesting because so much of what is perpetuated in in messaging about self-care is leave it there to your point about like, oh, well, is the podcast or anything else I'm adding on to my clinical work? Is that just extra? Right. And because it's extra, it's now you didn't say this, so I'm just filling in blanks, but like it's self-indulgent, right? Or it's like it's it's it's something for me, but because it's not for everyone, it's not for everyone and helping everyone, like that gets lower, uh, like on the priority list, right? And so those things we kind of put to the wayside. But I think it's revolutionary because what you're actually saying is like those things that you're saying are add-ons or that feel self-indulgent, or that I know you've been told to compartmentalize, actually it's not quite true. And in fact, maybe we should lean into what it would feel like for all of this to be integrated within you and and take that next step to be seen. And I do believe that particularly folks in private practice, but I will say all therapists are extremely creative people. I mean, like imagine trying to create whether it's a treatment plan, a tangible treatment plan, or just a vision for a way forward for someone that can't see it themselves, but you're gathering all of these pieces of stories and then somehow crafting a way to help them alleviate their symptoms or or the distressors in their lives. So there's a huge amount of creativity and sort of working with things you can't see, right? That I think is so beautiful, a beautiful part of our work is the art of I think of being a therapist. And you and I, I think are similar in the sense that we have found ways to share our creativity through these, through these projects, through these communities, through these resources or offerings we share. And and that is that is worthy of preserving because it helps sustain the other pieces of you and the other pieces of your work. I hope that made sense. But I'm just like, that is so revolutionary because that's not what you hear, that's not what you hear have most people like give you advice on. It's mostly like just find better ways to separate yourself.

SPEAKER_01 33:34

Yeah. I did a webinar the other day and I literally said, I think being a therapist is such sacred work. And in order for me to do that and maintain that sacredness, I actually need to also still be doing all of these other things. I still need to be fostering that creative part of myself, the fun part of myself who enjoys playing pickleball and walking around museums. Like all of that gets to coexist. And that's where I get to feel the most energized within that work. Uh, but speaking of visibility, you are also on the journey of writing a book you have just finished writing who sent it off.

SPEAKER_00 34:18

Um yes, yes. I have learned so much, I think, through the generosity of collective wisdom from a few other friends and colleagues I admire who certainly have gone before me on this path in many ways. But I have found that there's so many ways to walk a path. And so even though I have folks I know I'm grateful for who have been willing to share some of their insights and what it was like for them to write, to publish, to pursue, even just pursue this idea. But it is all very different. And at some point, and maybe clients feel this way too, or us as therapists who are clients feel this way too, at some point, someone can give you a play-by-player advice, but just by the nature of it being you, it's gonna be different and it may not be the right fit, right? This is why therapists don't give advice, is because it may not work for you. So I say that to say I've collected all the information I need from people, and yet I still find myself like all the insight in the world, all the advice in the world cannot quell my anxieties and insecurities about if we're only that simple and easy. But I am writing a book. I have been determined to do this for a very long time. I'll share what the book is about in a moment, or at least a concept of it. But for those who don't know me or are just hearing my voice for the first time, my background is in academia. I have written and published things in journals and textbooks, and it's a very specific type of writing. It's like a stylistically a very different type of writing. What I hope to write now is a more accessible, more accessible book for folks who are not therapists, which is in and of itself, I thought I was great at, but turns out I uh we all have our limitations. It turns out I'm not as great as I think I am, which is absolutely fine, a lesson in humility, but it's tough. It's not an easy feat. I get why people choose not to do this or feel discouraged at times about it. And I've been really honest about my own journey through it all. So my book, very, very briefly, is really a guide to help folks embrace actually what a similar topic of what we've been touching on, which is how to embrace your full self, but particularly if you identify as someone who is multicultural. And folks who are multicultural may move about the world in a very different way, but still have universal experiences. I'm sure people who are multicultural or who have felt minoritized within my being a minority have felt like they've had a code switch, have felt discrimination at various levels or points of their lives, or who are aware of sort of the intergenerational nature of trauma. All that is true and has been written about in so many wonderful ways. But I also want to convey we are so much more than those narratives and sometimes stereotypes in that trauma. And so this book really is about a guide for folks who are multicultural to validate certainly those experiences, not rewrite, but certainly complement the work that has already been done in the research space about these experiences and identity development, but as a way to move forward and what would that be like to say show up in your full self if you're in an intercultural relationship with someone else? And what kind of conversations would you have? How would you ask different questions to get to a point of depth and connection and safety that feel very different that you just have to consider because you grew up in a very different space than say your partner did? So there's a lot to it, but that's the guide, that's the idea, that's the concept behind it. I really appreciate you letting me get a chance to talk through it because so much of writing has sort of been just me, myself, and I, and in my own head writing this proposal and pieces of it and talking to my agent about it. And I have to get used to sharing it out loud a little bit more. It's not pitch perfect, but it is something. But it feels like it's been a long time coming. I I had the catalyst for all of it, or sort of what motivated me to lock in and do this now actually had to do with my we lost our dog, her name was Ember. We lost Ember in June of this year, and it just created this void in my my life and in my routines and in my schedule. And through that grief, it started off with me just trying to survive and fill up, fill up time, to be very, very honest and frank. And so I had all of these pages and things that I had written already because this wasn't a new idea to me, but I just wasn't in a space to do anything with it. And through her death, I have found some reconnection or sort of life and drive in writing. And that's always sort of been a refuge of is writing for me. So yeah, I mean that was a lot, but I hope that gives you some outline of where my head's at with what I've been doing with my time in this book journey.

SPEAKER_01 39:35

Absolutely. And I love that you're leaning into your strength with long form content. I think if anyone gets anything from this episode, I think there are a lot of like poignant points, and I've loved this conversation. Is that when we allow ourselves to lean into our strengths, when we allow ourselves to lean into the medium that we feel most confident in, the results that we can find are the sky's the limit. When we allow ourselves to lean into our strengths, lean into uh the areas where we can fully see ourselves grow, it is where we find the most enjoyment. I we don't have to be on TikTok, we don't have to be on Instagram, and I think within the social sphere, there are hierarchies of social media platforms right now. And even when we think about supporting, helping professionals and marketing themselves on platforms, leaning into the platform where you feel the most confident will allow you to drive your ideal client, your ideal audience. And if anyone gets anything from this episode today, it is go where you feel led, where you feel comfortable and confident, and allow yourself to start there. I feel like I could talk to you all afternoon. This was such an impact, an amazing conversation. Where can people find you if they're interested in reaching out or wanting to learn more about you?

SPEAKER_00 41:11

I do write a lot of content, but I have found people have reached out and said it made them think about their own profession a little bit differently. So even though I write for therapists, I'm sure you can take something from it. So you can find me on LinkedIn, all my handles, I'm the mindful healer. You can find me that way, or you can just Google my name, Dr. Monica P. Band. You should just say, like, and I hope you take away to find spaces where you're visible. That's it. And cut. This is the end of this episode.

SPEAKER_01 41:40

I love it. And I do like to remind folks that visibility is the standard. It's the closing that I'm working on, but I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 41:50

Just trying to find ways to plug that in wherever you can find it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:54

Absolutely. Well, thank you so much.