Why You Keep Falling for the Wrong Ones (and How to Stop)

You know that kind of relationship that feels like a rollercoaster? The butterflies, the intensity, the late-night spirals, we call it “chemistry,” but what if it’s actually chaos?

In this episode, Ilja Abbattista unpacks why we keep falling for the wrong people, especially if you’re living with ADHD, trauma, or both. From trauma bonds and emotional addiction to the ADHD dopamine trap, this episode explores why calm can feel boring, why emotionally unavailable people feel addictive, and how to finally rewire what you crave in love.

It’s raw. It’s real. It might sting a little. But it just might change the way you date forever.

🔍 We talk about:

• The difference between trauma bonding and real connection
• Why your ADHD brain craves chaos
• How 'avoidants' become dopamine hits
• The science behind your “type”
• And how to start healing from the inside out

🎧 Plus, Ilja shares personal truths about what safe love really feels like, and how it’s nothing like the love she used to chase.

If you’ve ever confused intensity with intimacy, or felt addicted to the wrong person, this episode is for you.

🔮 Teaser for Episode 9:
 We’re talking about what happens after the chaos, rebuilding intimacy, trust, and desire when your whole love map has changed.

🎙️ Until next spiral…
 This is Dating on High Alert.

Free Guide

You’re Not Too Much. You Were Just Never Met Fully.

A short guide for anyone who has ever felt too sensitive, too intense, or too much in relationships.

Download it here:
 https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/youre-not-too-much-free-guide/

🎧 Subscribe, share, and spiral with me.

For more raw, honest takes on dating, ADHD, trauma, and being a woman on high alert — head to iljaabbattista.co.uk

Let’s keep this messy, magical conversation going:
 📩 Get updates: https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/truth-led-podcast-sign-up/
 🎙️ Submit a guest pitch or topic: https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/%f0%9f%8e%99%ef%b8%8f-submit-a-guest-pitch-or-podcast-topic/
 📬 Contact me: empowerher@ilja-abbattista.com
 📱 Follow along on Instagram: @ilja.abbattista

Unmask. Rebuild. Thrive.