Dating on High Alert
Dating on High Alert dives into the messy reality of relationships and life, neurodivergence, trauma, masking, and survival mode - because when your nervous system has spent years trying to keep you safe, connection gets complicated.
Hosted by Ilja Abbattista - trauma-informed coach, survivor advocate, and AuDHD truth-teller - this podcast explores ADHD, autism, CPTSD, attachment, emotional overwhelm, nervous system responses, and what it actually means to build safety in love and life after survival.
For neurodivergent people, trauma survivors, partners, and couples trying to understand each other more deeply.
Because this isn’t just about dating.
It’s about learning to hear yourself again, in life and in love.
New episodes weekly.
Until next spiral.
Dating on High Alert
“You’re Too Sensitive": When Feeling Everything Isn’t Weakness
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
What if being “too sensitive” isn’t a flaw… but a nervous system that learned to pay attention?
In this episode, Ilja explores what it means to feel everything deeply, the overwhelm, the misunderstanding, and the strength that can come from emotional depth.
For many neurodivergent and trauma-experienced people, empathy isn’t just understanding someone’s pain. It’s feeling it in your body.
That intensity can be exhausting.
It can make others uncomfortable.
And it can leave you questioning whether something is wrong with you.
But what if the opposite is true?
In this conversation, Ilja reflects on:
• why some people absorb emotional environments so strongly
• the difference between emotional intensity and instability
• why releasing emotion can actually be a form of regulation
• how sensitivity can become a powerful form of leadership and advocacy
• the importance of boundaries when holding other people’s pain
Through personal reflection and lived experience, this episode challenges the idea that strength means emotional detachment.
Sometimes the people who feel the most… are the ones capable of holding the most.
If you’ve ever been told you’re “too sensitive,” this episode may help you understand your depth in a different way.
Listen if you’re navigating:
- Late diagnosis (ADHD, autism, trauma)
- Emotional intensity and empathy
- Nervous system sensitivity
- Shame around being “too much”
If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who has been told they’re too sensitive.
They might just be deeply wired.
And as usual…
Until next spiral.
Free Guide
You’re Not Too Much. You Were Just Never Met Fully.
A short guide for anyone who has ever felt too sensitive, too intense, or too much in relationships.
Download it here:
https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/youre-not-too-much-free-guide/
🎧 Subscribe, share, and spiral with me.
Dating on High Alert explores relationships, life, neurodivergence, trauma, masking, nervous systems, and what it actually means to build safety in love after survival.
For neurodivergent people, trauma survivors, partners, and couples trying to understand each other more deeply.
🖤 Explore support, coaching, and resources:
https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/resources
📩 Join the podcast mailing list:
https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/truth-led-podcast-sign-up/
🎙️ Submit a guest pitch or podcast topic:
https://iljaabbattista.co.uk/podcast-dating-on-high-alert/#submitastory
🎧 Support the podcast:
https://www.buzzsprout.com/2463815/supporters/new
📱 Instagram:
@iljaabbattista
📬 Contact:
letsconnect@iljaabbattista.co.uk
Until next spiral,
Ilja x