The Awakened Heart: A Podcast for Healing Women

BONUS EPI: When There’s Never Enough: Time, Energy, Money, and Worth

• Season 1

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Scarcity isn’t just about money.  Feelings of scarcity are a nervous system rooted in the belief that there’s never enough time, energy, or worth to feel safe.

In this Epi, we’ll explore how trauma and neurodivergence shape our relationship to “enoughness.” Join me as we unpack how scarcity shows up in time, productivity, money, and self-worth.

“Scarcity isn’t who you are. It’s what your body learned to do when safety was unpredictable.”

Journal Prompts:

  • Where does scarcity speak the loudest in your life right now (time, money, energy, worth)?
  • What does your body do when you feel “not enough”?
  • What would sufficiency feel like in your body if it were safe to experience it?
  • What’s one small way you can practice “enough for now” this week?

Connect with Me:

I offer virtual sessions whether you’re healing trauma, navigating a big life shift, or just ready to come home to yourself, I hold space for women just like you everyday.

Fill out a consultation requests via my linktree (http://linktr.ee/EmpoweringWellnessHub)  for a free 15 min chat to see if we are a good fit! 

Also you can find my link and follow me on instagram & there’s also a badass **Spotify playlist** made for women healing through softness and strength!!!

Connect with me about this episode!

SPEAKER_00:

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the Awaken Heart, my dears. This is a podcast for healing women. This is a space where your voice matters. Your body is sacred, and your journey home to yourself is honored, no matter how winding the road. I'm Audda Moran, licensed professional counselor, life coach, and yoga instructor. But ultimately, I am here to be your companion on this divine path we call healing. I'm in the living room, no one's home, so I'm taking advantage of just sitting here and relaxing with my morning cup of decaf. So I might take a sip break, I might not. It's my one cup of the day, so I don't want it to get cold. So we might have some breath breaks, some thought breaks, just to let you know where I'm at this morning. But here we go. Today's episode is something that I believe and see and have been trained to see that it quietly shapes almost every decision, every stress response, and every feeling of pressure so many of us carry. And that is the story of scarcity, of not having enough. And I'm not talking about money, even though that's a big one. It's that constant hum of not enough, not enough time, energy, progress, not enough you. It's the story so many of us learned long before we had words for it. A story that became part of how our nervous systems orient to the world. And for some of us, especially neurodivergent trauma experience, women, that story doesn't just live in our minds, it lives in our body. We feel it in our bones. That you are one step behind, one mistake away, or that no matter how much you do, there's still gonna be a gap between where you are and where you should be. Hello, your body learns that resources are not guaranteed. And that can mean food, money, attention, love, or simply you can't even rest enough, depending on how rest is defined in your home, right? So your system starts operating like a machine that can never power down. You might recognize it as always needing to get one more thing done before you can relax, or struggling to stop working even when you are exhausted. How about feeling guilty for resting when there's still laundry, emails, unread text, unfinished healing? Scarcity tells us safety lives just past the next completed task. But safety doesn't live there. In your body, in this moment, in your capacity to notice and breathe. If love was conditional, if stability was unpredictable, if people or systems you depended on were unreliable, your body learned that safety had to be earned. So for trauma survivors, scarcity is often learned through experience. And when you're in life in a calmer state, your nervous system is still searching for the next thing to secure safety again. Work harder, do it perfectly, fix it before someone gets upset with you. Bitch, you better keep it all together. Don't let them know you're falling apart. It's like that old saying of waiting for the other shoe to drop. You're always waiting for that motherfucking shoe to drop. Because shit can't be good. That's your nervous system scanning for the familiar chaos that it has, I guess, grown, right? Been conditioned to know. For us neurodivergent folks, for highly sensitive nervous system people, scarcity is often reinforced by living in a world that doesn't match our natural pacing. So time scarcity, for example, it's it's just poor time. It's it's it's often called poor time management, but it's not that. It's living in a culture that punishes nonlinear brains. So if you tell yourself I'm always late or I waste time, but underneath that, the real wound, that's not the truth. The truth is that your rhythm isn't accepted here. The messaging of culture, of society, of the conditioning is nope, that's not it. Do it like this. Instead of saying, Oh, I see you, this is your rhythm. Let's accommodate that. And when your energy fluctuates, when your sensory load is high, when executive functioning is just fucking frazzled and you can't organize, make a decision, manage time, manage emotions, like it's all just going haywire. You start believing that you can't keep up, that there's something wrong with you because you need more rest or less stimulation. Scarcity is telling us that needing differently means we are less. But your needs don't make you less, my dear. They make you fucking human. They make you you. Your needs, your rhythms, your sensitivities matter just as much as everybody else's. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise. Because if they're trying to convince you that, they're manipulating you so that they get their way, so that life stays according to them. I don't know if you can hear it in the background, and I'm sorry, my cats are jumping all over the place. Animals, please. I'm recording. Okay, let's talk about scarcity of time first. Not because I think it's the biggest one, but because I just want to start there. No, neither of these scarcities are more important than the other. We all feel scarcity and some level, if not many. Because we live in a culture that treats time like currency, right? So something to spend, something to save, or something to waste. But for us, for who I'm talking to, neurodivergent trauma experience women, time doesn't move in straight lines. Our hormones don't move in straight lines. Like our genetic makeup doesn't move in straight lines. Sometimes we lose hours to hyperfocus or to freeze. Sometimes time stretches and collapses around your anxiety or sensory overwhelm. And what really fucking sucks is when you come back to yourself, oftentimes the first thing we feel is shame. You can tell your thing, your see the messaging would be like, I've lost so much time, I should be further ahead. And then that the one word that makes me so angry is lazy. Calling yourself lazy or irresponsible. And I know that's the nervous system's only way it knows how to regulate itself. But the truth is you're not behind, you're recalibrating. So when your nervous system is wired for vigilance, energy goes towards scanning for danger, not toward creativity, joy, or self-care. So you might wake up tired, rest and still feel tired, push yourself and still feel behind. Scarcity of time and energy often becomes a scare, a scarcity of safety. You're just not safe to relax quite yet. I can't let go quite yet. I'm not right there to take a day off. I don't have enough time. Meanwhile, you've got a PTO bank that says use or lose, and you've got weeks to take off. You've got plenty of time. Until your body feels safe to rest, rest will never feel productive enough to count. So what? Sorry, I took a sip without warning. So what to do about that? So fuck, I tried to rest autumn, and you're telling me that it has to feel safe, or I'll never feel productive in rest. So, what does that mean? I want you to redefine your definition of productivity. I want you to redefine your definition of rest. Write down what you feel it is right now, what your beliefs are, what you think of it, what comes to mind, what judgments you have of yourself for rest and productivity. And then I want you to find out where did I get this? Where's the source? Who is the source of this definition? And do I want to mimic their life? Do I want to live like they're living now? Were they a reliable source? And ultimately, does this rule fit me or is it working against me? And all your answers are okay. This is not about pointing people out for doing something fucked up or wrong or anything like that. This is about just saying, I am living my life based on definitions that someone gave me that don't even belong to me. I'm living a life through someone else's lens, except for my own. Start living your life on your terms with your definitions based on your goals, your love, your passions, your life. Because, sis, my ultimate goal, and I'm doing well, and I've got more to come, but my ultimate goal is I want to live a life that I don't have to vacation from. I want my day-to-day to be so in tune with happiness and joy that vacations are like an afterthought because I'm having so much fucking fun right now. So outside of time, we've got money scarcity. And this can be huge, big, motivating all kinds of behaviors that can be detrimental to your life, to your getting to your goals. When you've lived with financial instability, systemic barriers, hello. I mean, the economy we live in, we can sit and have a conversation about groceries at ad nauseum right now. Or even just emotional deprivation. The nervous system attaches to money as proof of security. So even when things are okay, you might feel the background hum of anxiety saying it could all disappear. It's my dog walking around, tickety-tack, tickety-tack. Sorry. Yes, his nails should be clipped, but he he doesn't like people. And we haven't quite been able to figure out the muzzle we ordered to help him get a groomer. So sorry. I'm not a horrible pet owner. Here we go. There's my explanation on the tickety tag, but he's laid down now. All right. Think about Maslow's hierarchy of needs. So in the 40s, Abraham Maslow, yes, dated, and I'm gonna put a relevant twist on it, but he created what was called hierarchy of needs. It describes the stages of human motivation and what drives behavior. And it's represented as a pyramid with five levels, starting from basic survival needs up to personal fulfillment. And in today's world, I would change level one a bit. And I would change level one and two a bit. So level one is like your necessities, shelter, food, water. Level two is like creature comforts, financial stability. But in today's world, like financial stability needs to be a one because without the financial stability, you can't have shelter, you can't have water, you can't have food. So the scarcity mentality added to that, right? Like there's hardly any way to reach top levels of fulfillment and personal growth according according to his levels, if we experience and feel in our bodies that things are scarce at the very basic levels. Money scarcity is what I'm getting at. And traditional finance advice often misses the mark when it comes to being neurodivergent, trauma experienced, or just living in this world. But because it is because it assumes consistent executive functioning, it assumes emotional regulation, and it assumes you have trust in future stability, that money is gonna keep coming, that it's not gonna run out. And these are things your nervous system may not always provide. It's not that you're bad with money, it's that your body associates scarcity with survival. You might overspend when you feel unsafe, like I've gonna get it before it runs out, buying comfort and control. Or you might hoard resources, afraid to use what you have, because there's never gonna be enough. And if you spend just a little bit, if you buy that shirt, if you take yourself out, it's all gonna disappear. Talk about being neurodivergent, black and white, all or nothing thinking. Ugh, and scarcity. Aye aye. Scarcity isn't always about what's in your account, it's about what your body remembers. And healing starts with an awareness, not judgment. When you catch yourself in scarcity spirals, pause and name what's really happening. But right now I'm safe enough. And then also budget. Make it simple, make it some sort of two to three-step process that's not overwhelming and that fits your needs. There's the zero budget. Every penny is accounted for. So you pay your bills, you pay yourself to play, you pay for groceries, you set aside money for eating out, you set aside money for savings if it's there, like even if it's a dollar, like just everything is accounted for. And then at the at the end, you have zero dollars because it's all paid for and accounted for. Or you can do a split, and I'm just gonna throw out numbers because I don't know math and I use the internet to help me with this, but it's like a 60, 30, 10 split. So, like a certain percentage goes to bills, a certain percentage goes to like groceries and fun time, and a certain percentage goes to savings. Whatever your pay is, take out your bills and then split that difference between splurge and save or splurge and debt. I'm not a financer. I uh, you know, I've I've I've I'm neurodivergent. And when you start talking numbers to me, if you've checked out, check back in. Take a sip, take a breath. I'm not gonna talk numbers anymore. I'm not throwing percentages at you. We're back on track. Because when I hear someone start talking about numbers, skip jump jump, please, on to the next, because I cannot. We're gonna have to do it differently. So if you have experiences with numbers like I did, sorry for bombarding you with numbers. Here we go. All I'm saying is find a simple budget. The thing about being neurodivergent, ADHD, is that what happens is anything beyond three steps needs visuals, needs training, needs time to adjust. So whatever your budget is, find one that gives you two to three steps, two to three anchors to get you started. It's not overwhelming. And then moving on, right? Money scarcity, there's a lot, and I think there's a lot to do for a whole episode. So this is just my first intro about scarcity. But money scarcity and time scarcity come up a lot in sessions, and it's something that I feel needs to be talked about a lot more than just this episode. So more to come, more to dive in, but scarcity of money is a big one, but it's not overshadowing the next one because I think it's also, oh my goodness, a million gigajillion percent important. And that's scarcity of self-worth. And I think sometimes, a lot of the times, this is the heart of it all. Because the scarcity says, I'll rest when I've earned it. I'll feel proud when I've done enough. Oof, so detrimental, so shooting yourself in the foot, right? I'll feel safe when I've proven myself. Oh, heartbreaking. This is the trauma echo. That echo, that belief that your worth is tied to your output. And in neurodivergent spaces, that's magnified by constant messages of not fitting, not performing, and not measuring up. So we learn to equate busyness with belonging. I'm gonna take a sip for that. You keep performing safety in your job, in your relationships, and yes, even in your healing journey, you turn self-improvement into a new way of chasing worthiness. Ooh, hello, neurodivergent trauma experienced women. Right? Like, it's not about trauma being my identity, but when I dug in and I realized I layers and layers needed to come undone, it was a mission, it was a goal. I had to get somewhere to be able to breathe. And it's like, no, sis, you can breathe during the healing. It's a beautiful space to be, not a space to dive in and charge full speed ahead in. Is it hard? Is it heavy? Yes, but there's fucking beauty in the healing journey. But what if the goal is never to become more? What if the goal is to finally be without proof, performance, or punishment? My animals are making so much noise. My apologies for background noise today. Scarcity keeps us chasing wholeness, not realizing we are whole all along. It's that saying that you have it all within you. You know, once you turn within, all the answers are there. We have all the answers. You know, when you wake up and you go through your day, and those thoughts you can't keep thinking of like, this isn't right, I don't want to feel this way. I'd rather be here. This isn't fitting me. I'm not happy. I want to be somewhere else. Let me escape. I could go on and on. Those are not flighty, selfish, incorrect thoughts. That is your core, your soul, your subconscious, your God, your universe, whoever you want to attribute, attribute, attribute your higher power to. We can do this. These are seeds your subconscious is bringing to the conscious, saying, There's enough. We can do this. And the body holds the memory of not enough in small, quiet ways. A tightness in your chest, flutters in your stomach when you check your bank balance, maybe a hollow sinking feeling when someone doesn't text back right away. The urge to overexplain, overcommit, all in the name of earning safety again, safety with people, safety with things. But this is not weakness, this is wiring. Your body learned that stillness wasn't safe, that slowing down meant something bad could happen: rejection, failure, and even loss. So now, even when life is okay, your body keeps running, trying to get ahead of that invisible threat, that shoe to drop. This is why logic alone doesn't heal scarcity. Because it's not just a thought, it's a posture, it's a breath pattern, a muscle tension, it's a fucking loop. You can't outthink your way to safety. You have to feel your way there. Start by noticing the exact moment your body tightens in scarcity. It might sound like, I don't have time for this, or I can't afford to slow down. If I rest, I'll fall behind. Take a nice deep breath. Breathe into where those thoughts land in your body. Is it your throat, your jaws, your belly, your shoulders? Notice what it's protecting, what it's afraid of. Scarcity is your body's way of saying, I'm scared, I'll be left behind. You don't need to argue with it. Just meet. Just meet it. When you meet it with breath and presence and compassion, you're teaching your nervous system a new story. That safety doesn't have to be earned anymore. So somatic breath work, this is where I'm going. If you can, place one one hand over your heart, one hand on your belly. If you're driving, if your hands are busy, and everyone else, that is, hands on heart and belly, relax the shoulders. Maybe roll them back. Release the jaws, make sure the teeth aren't clenching together. And try to soften your face. In between the eyes, the corner of the eyes, around the mouth. Just try to relax, relax the lips. Take a slow deep breath in through your nose. Hold it there for a count of three, two, one, and exhaling out of the mouth, gently let the breath out. Inhale deeply, quietly repeating to yourself, I have enough time for this moment. Exhale out any negativity. Inhale deeply. I am enough for this day. Exhale out any negativity. Inhale deeply. My body can rest without falling behind. Let out that negativity. Notice how your body responds. It's not about perfection or feeling any specific thing. But is your body curious? Is there a little bit of lightness, or do you notice where the tension is? And if your breath feels shallow only in the chest, that's okay. If your mind wanders, that's okay too. You're practicing safety, not performance. So we're gonna stay here for three slow breaths. As you inhale, orient yourself around your room or car, wherever you're at. Notice the color of something. Exhale out any negativity. Inhale deeply. Notice how your clothes feel against your skin. Exhale out any negativity. Last breath in here. Inhale. Notice how you feel. Any tension, any aggravation in the body or mind. Let out any negativity. Every time you breathe with your body instead of against it, you're choosing sufficiency over survival. I'm gonna take a sip. Take a breath, get get reoriented. I'm gonna give you some journal prompts. So if you want to open up a notepad, open up your journal, um, or just listen up. Journal prompts are coming because I want you to reflect. I want you to dive deeper. I want you to heal your feelings of scarcity. Because, sis, there is enough for all of us. Enough love, enough time, enough money. And I know that the world, the politics, the economy, the people are all a little upside down right now. So I'm not trying to ignore the fact that sometimes it feels like we have an existential crisis minimum of once a day. It's not even existential at this point, and I understand that too. But I'm still saying in the grand scheme of things, there is enough time, there is enough money, there is enough resources. We might have to hustle. It's gonna be hard. But like I say all the time, life is hard. So choose your hard wisely. You can fumble and fumble and fumble and fumble and go through life having hard days, hard moments, or you can set yourself on a path that is fucking hard, but it's gonna give you an outcome that you've Only dreamed of. It can create your wildest dreams. So choose your heart wisely. All right. Here we go. Journal prompts. Where does scarcity speak the loudest in your life right now? Time, money, energy, your worth? What does your body do when you feel not enough? I'm gonna take a sip. So where does scarcity speak the loudest right now? And where does your body feel it when you feel not enough? What would enoughness feel like in your body if it were safe to experience it? So this is me asking you to daydream. Who would you be if you had enough? Work on that. This is not a one-time question. I want you to say, this is like the trend of like your dream day, how you would wake up, how you would spend your life. Well, what would enoughness look like? What would your life look like if there was enough? Work on that for like a week. Every day come back to it. Add, subtract, edit, do whatever you want to that, and make that at the end of the week your path, your goal, a direction on getting more enoughness in your life. And there will be ups and downs while you're following this path. There will be setbacks. That is life. Don't let it stop you. Keep going. I know what it's like to start from absolutely zero. Zero money, zero support system, zero followers, zero in many aspects of my life, personally and professionally. And the one thing I haven't done is I've kept going. Did I give up a little bit? I did give up a little bit. It got hard sometimes, but I got back on it. I never gave up seeking out the life that I so want, I so dream of. It's a dream. It's been there, it's got to be there for a reason. I don't make this stuff up, just torture myself. It's doable. If you dream it, you can do it. I know that sounds silly. I know that sounds fake. Make this list. Be fucking specific. Because when you ask the universe for something, it's gonna give it to you. But it's based on your specificities. Specificities, specific request. Tongue tied. Can't really say a lot of words. So be specific. Work on this list. Work on what enoughness looks like in your life. Have faith. Keep working at it. And last question, last prompt. What's one small way you can practice enough for now? Just this week. I'm not asking you to fix scarcity. I'm asking you to start hearing it for what it really is. A nervous system longing for safety, belonging, and rest. Regulate the shit out of your nervous system. If opening your bank account or balancing your budget is dysregulating, throws you off, makes you irritable, makes you want to fight, makes you sad or freeze, then you've got a couple of steps. Before you do it, I want you to put an ice pack on your chest. After you do it, I want you to get that ice pack, put it on your chest, with your legs up the wall. Ten minutes. That's all I'm asking. 10 minutes, five minutes to regulate with the ice pack before, 10 minutes to decompress and regulate after. And talk to yourself with compassion, understanding, and deep breaths throughout both of those processes. Because scarcity isn't who you are, it's what you've learned in order to fucking survive. And now you get to learn something new: that there is enough. You have enough, you know enough, you are enough. Not because the world has changed, but because you are no longer abandoning yourself to chase what you already have. Enoughness isn't a destination, it's a way home to your own body. Other regulating techniques are humming on the Star Spangled Banner, hum, happy birthday, hum your favorite song, chanting any of the chakra chants, or ohm or ah, whatever feels good. Put the bees together, the buzz sound, very good. Teeth together, lips together, very good. Dancing, being out in nature, putting your feet down in the earth, you know, the earthing trend, but do it. It's great. Sitting out in sunshine, shaking, waving, swaying, rocking. There's several ways you can regulate your nervous system. My quick go-to is an ice pack on the chest. All right. That's it on scarcity for me for today. I believe there is more to come. I think there will be more to come. They're in my notes to do an episode on, maybe breaking these down to be a little bit more detailed in how to work through it. If you like this episode, please message me. Yes, I want more. Just comment more. What emoji could you put if you wanted more about this? Just tell me what you want. Money, worth, time. What would you like to hear more of? I'd really like to have your feedback. Aim to please. And if this episode helped you feel more understood and less alone, please share it with someone else that you feel might need it. And if you don't know, now you're about to know, I offer virtual sessions. Whether you're healing trauma, navigating a big life shift, or just ready to come home to yourself. I hold space for women just like you every week. And it is my honor, my blessing, my life's goal, my life's purpose to help you be happy, to help the world be a happier place. I'd love to help you. So if that's something you're curious about, fill out a consultation form in my link tree. It's a free 15-minute convo with me. So bring your questions to suss out whether we're a good fit or not. I'd be happy to answer anything you got. And if you want something to listen to, listen to my badass Spotify playlist made for women, healing through softness and strength. It's called Divine Women. It is also in my Link Tree. And those songs are on Apple. I think I'm eventually gonna make an Apple playlist. I'm getting there. It just takes time. And there's more resources to guide you home to your voice, to your body, and to your power. Just remember, you are never too much, you're never too late, and you don't have to figure it out all alone. Until next time, my dears, may you be happy and free. May mine and your healing ripple outward to bless the world with happiness and freedom. Take care of you, and I'll see you soon.

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Autumn Moran

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