The Shit That Matters

PCOS, Fertility, and the Quiet Grief

Anamaria Velasquez

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0:00 | 36:43

This week’s episode is tender. Raw. Real-time.

I’m recording this from day two of my period after a month that felt different, more connected, more hopeful, more in tune with my body than ever before.

As a 34-year-old woman who has lived with PCOS since I was 16, I’m opening up about fertility, irregular cycles, shame, self-trust, and what it means to love your body even when it doesn’t do what you hoped it would.

This is not a teaching episode.
 There’s no framework.
 No steps.

Just me telling the truth.

Timestamps:

00:00 – A tender content note + why this episode feels so alive for me
 03:45 – Getting my first period at nine + feeling “different” early on
 08:10 – PCOS symptoms at 16 + years of dismissal before my diagnosis
 13:30 – The years I was angry at my body + living in stress mode
 18:45 – Learning self-compassion + what whole human healing means to me
 24:20 – Why this cycle felt different + the hope of “maybe this time”
 28:15 – The moment with Gino that shifted something in both of us
 33:40 – The hard conversations about fertility + wondering if I was “enough”
 39:10 – Day two grief + choosing not to hate myself
 43:50 – GLP-1, PCOS, and removing shame from getting support
 48:30 – Holding hope and grief in the same body
 52:00 – The quiet, private moments that actually matter

This episode is about becoming anchored in myself, especially in the moments no one else sees.

It’s about not abandoning myself when life doesn’t unfold on my timeline.

If you’re navigating fertility, diagnosis, timing, body changes, or hard relationship conversations, I hope this makes you feel less alone.

You are not broken.
You are not alone.
This is the shit that matters. 💛

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