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Redesigning Life with Sabrina Soto
Redesigning Life with Sabrina Soto is a podcast dedicated to inspiring intentional living, personal growth, and transformation. Hosted by design expert and lifestyle guru Sabrina Soto, each episode dives into conversations about wellness, mindset, home, and self-improvement with leading experts and thought leaders. With a mix of practical advice, heartfelt storytelling, and empowering insights, Redesigning Life is your go-to space for creating a life that feels as good as it looks—one thoughtful choice at a time.
Redesigning Life with Sabrina Soto
Finding Your Authentic Path with Almost 30's Krista Williams
Have you ever felt like your entire life was falling apart, only to realize later it was falling into place? Krista Williams, co-host of the Almost 30 podcast and author of the upcoming book by the same name, joins Redesigning Life to reveal the cosmic phenomenon that might explain why so many of us experience profound upheaval around age 29.
Whether you're approaching 30, reflecting back on that transformative period or simply seeking more alignment in your life, this episode offers profound wisdom about navigating change with grace. Follow Krista on Instagram or visit almost30.com to learn about her upcoming book tour and join a community that's redefining what it means to grow through life's inevitable transitions.
Connect with Krista Williams:
https://itskrista.com/
https://almost30.com/
Krista Williams on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/itskrista/
Connect with Sabrina:
https://www.instagram.com/Sabrina_Soto/
www.SabrinaSoto.com
Welcome to Redesigning Life. I'm your host, sabrina Soto, and this is the space where we have honest conversations about personal growth, mindset shifts and creating a life that feels truly aligned. In each episode, I'll talk to experts in their fields who share their insights to help you step into your higher self. Let's redesign your life from the inside out. Welcome to the podcast.
Speaker 2:Krista, it's round two baby. We had our podcast on almost 30, I think, a week ago now and it was. I just was telling my friend I was like it was one of the best conversations I've had in a long time, just because it's us and I just I love you so much, I'm so grateful to be on your show and I'm just so proud of you. The new show is amazing and you're just such an amazing human, so I love you.
Speaker 1:And I am so proud of you because you've got a book coming out. It's almost 30. So Krista Williams is the host, the co-host of almost 30, with her best friend, lindsay. Everyone knows what almost 30 is. She also has a podcast called morning microdose. But this book almost 30 is coming out June 9th, is it Third, oh, third, okay.
Speaker 1:So I have so many questions that I want to get to Thank you for being on Redesigning Life. You were going to be on my show but you couldn't do it because of your schedule. So next season you're on it because I adore you and maybe I should give people a little bit of feedback. So you and I have been friends for a few years now. We met at a lunch with Terry Cole and I don't know what it was, but I'm like this. This B is going to be. I think I forced you to be my friend, no, so we would go on these really long walks and talk about the craziest things, and what I realized is that nothing that we ever talked like you're. Every nothing is off limits with you, and I've realized that you're like that in this book too. You talked about everything from spirituality to relationships. So I want to get to that first. But you start off the book with something called uh the return, this your return your Saturn return.
Speaker 1:I'm like your Saturn return. I can't believe that I never heard about this, because I've gotten my chart read and I have astrologers that I go to like once every six months. How the heck did I not know about this? So, for other people who are living in a cave like me, can you please explain to the listeners what your Saturn return is?
Speaker 2:Yes, so if you're an astrology nerd, you probably know. But if you're new to astrology, or even if you think it's woo-woo, I think the themes of what happens at the Saturn return period apply to anyone. So the Saturn return is basically when the planet Saturn hits the same point in the sky as it does when you were born, so it's around 29.5 years. It probably happens two to three times in your lifetime, so around 29.5, around late fifties. And then when you're in your nineties and the Saturn is the planet of, it's like the cosmic daddy. It's going to really bring up the lessons and things in your life to make sure that you're living your life in alignment. So it's going to be relationships, career, um, friendships.
Speaker 2:If you are not in aligned friendships, if you are not in aligned relationships, if you are not in an aligned career, that will come up for you and it most likely will be a rock bottom moment, and we know that rock bottom moments aren't the most fun. They're really painful and they can be really hard, but they often bring us closer to where we need to go. We've all been through the breakup that was really bad but ultimately led us to a relationship that we were meant to be in. We all know about the friendship breakups that were for our greatest good even though they were painful. So the Saturn return period is a time in life when many people are questioning everything and really waking up to the truth of their life and going through a lot of different things that really feel tough and challenging.
Speaker 1:Like for me. I was that's what I was going to ask you what was going on with you during that time?
Speaker 2:Yeah, my um. A lot of the themes of Saturn returns for people are like themes of their life too. So at that point in time I'd quit my full-time job to pursue blogging full-time. I wanted to be a blogger. I ended up not making any money blogging, so I had to serve and nanny and make weird videos for this Chinese brand, like it was. Just, it was such a weird time.
Speaker 2:I was really struggling with my body too. I'm someone that's struggled with my body my whole life. You know, I was a person that always felt like there was something to fix or change, and I've been on a diet since I was very young, and so the fact of my Saturn return period. It almost came to a point where it was so painful and the voice was so loud that I had to do something about it, and so that really came to a head during that time. And then I didn't really know it, but I was in really codependent friendships. I was in friendships with women that I had to self-sacrifice for their love. We kind of would lose our identities in one another. There was a lot of triangulation happening and then, lastly, I was in my relationship with my ex-husband, so there was a lot of patterns of our dynamic that I wasn't really seeing but were really really coming to the surface.
Speaker 1:So I'm reading your book and I'm like Saturn return. And then I realized, at 29 and a half, I think, is when I asked for a divorce. That's when I got my first HGTV job. I was that age and my whole life went for me living in a house, living a you know, quiet married life, working as a mortgage broker and doing staging to being on, like the other side of the country, living my dream job, you know, like overnight. It wasn't overnight, but yes. So now I'm like, oh my God, I can't, how did I not know about this? But then it makes sense. That's why everybody feels like everything is falling apart during this time.
Speaker 2:Yes, it is. And so there's the Saturn return. That's happening from the cosmic perspective and then also from a brain perspective. Your prefrontal cortex is coming online in your late twenties. So your prefrontal cortex is responsible for um, your consciousness, so your conscious thoughts and emotions. So up until that point, we're sort of playing off of a script that our family told us, our parents told us, media told us. And at the point when your prefrontal cortex comes online, you're processing your decisions and your emotions from a place of consciousness. So you're like what do I actually want to do? Do I actually want to be in this relationship? In your case? An example do I actually want to stay as a mortgage broker? Like you really look at things differently and it's a really empowering feeling, but also really scary. So there's brain stuff that happens then too.
Speaker 2:And you know, the average age for the first person to have their kid is 29. The average age for the person to get married is like 28.5. Most people are like dealing with college debt. During this time, you're moving, you're changing friends. Like, this period is one of the most powerful and impactful in our lives, and I think for Lindsay and I, in our podcast and even in the book. We just wanted to talk about this period where we felt so lost and we felt so alone and we felt so confused and we felt like we were doing all the things but nothing that was right, and we want to make people aware that change can be for your greatest good, like your change was scary, like it wasn't easy, but it was for your greatest good. So change can be something that leads you to greater possibility, rather than down a path that is worse.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I, I, I just couldn't believe. And then I'm like, holy moly, what's going to happen when I'm 60? Like this is going to happen again.
Speaker 2:Which is amazing.
Speaker 2:But again you're living. This is the thing you're probably going to be living, aligned, so it's going to be beautiful, it's going to be good, it's like it's all to help you in your alignment, it's all supportive of you. I think we have such an interesting relationship culturally with change where we feel like change is scary. Change is something we need to brace for. But I think most of your listeners and most people that I know they have a vision for a life that they want. They have a vision for a relationship that they want, and to have that they need to change their life now. They need to change their relationships now, and so the change can be something that can really lead us to being more happy in living a life that we love.
Speaker 1:So during I mean, you've been really open about your breakup, which was, it's, huge because you guys were together for 10 years. So how did you, how did you embrace the scary part? Because if somebody is listening to this and they could either be in a relationship whether it's romantic, a friendship, maybe a career that they're into and they're like, great, yes, I'm feeling this. I do want the change. It's the fear that keeps them sort of stuck. How did you get past knowing that this wasn't for your highest good anymore and then move through the fear in order to actually create that change in your life?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so in my relationship, when you're in a relationship that long, so in my relationship when you're in a relationship that long, it's not just one day I was like time to go. I was struggling for a while I would say three years at that point and we were married. So I was struggling in the marriage. I didn't really understand my biggest question in that relationship was what is a normal hard in relationships and what is misalignment? What is a normal part of growth and deepening in the fears that come up of intimacy and all of that, and what is truly me just forcing something or living unaligned. So I lived that question for a lot of the time.
Speaker 2:So I think, for anyone listening you know, my process was to really deepen and learn all of the lessons that I was supposed to learn in that container. So to make sure that I was being loving and soft, to make sure that I was trying as hard as I could to see their perspective, to make sure that I was becoming a better communicator. I was doing all the things. So I spent a few years just really shape-shifting, changing, evolving, doing all these things in the relationship container so that when I had that hit and that clarity of leaving. I knew that I was doing it, knowing that I had done everything that I, you know, cleaned my I'm sure you had that too Like I completely cleaned my side of the street before I left. And then, when there was a moment where it was our anniversary and I don't know if you ever had a relationship where you'd fight every holiday, yes, and birthday, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:What do you mean?
Speaker 2:Like Christmas, thanksgiving anniversary, valentine's day, like it was just like anniversary. We're fighting, of course, like, and so we were just fighting. And at that time my goal was to be soft. I was like I'm going to be super soft and loving, and so I was being, as much as I could, super soft and loving when we were fighting. And I was sitting on the corner of the bed and I heard my soul say for the right person, you don't need to be perfect, you just need to be yourself.
Speaker 2:And I had felt like for so long in that relationship I had to be perfect, I had to communicate the right relationship. So it was a mix of me doing a lot of work internally in that relationship, us going to therapy, trying everything that I could so that I could feel clear in my heart that I had done everything I could in this relationship and I had gotten the benefits of a spiritual relationship container. And then, two, it was waiting for the clear sign from my soul. Um, and just as a last point, like a 2.0, 2.0 or three, I also was like there, I don't know what's out there, but I know it's better than this. It was so clear that, like I don't even know what dating is like, what the world is like, but it has to be better than this, because I am miserable, so that was sort of my process with it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think that's great advice. I remember when I broke up with Olivia's dad, I I tried everything, and I did it more so that if Olivia ever asks me when she's older what happened, I can look at her in the eye and say I tried everything I could to repair that. And I think that's really important, especially in a marriage, because you never want a second guess because I don't know about you, but for me, like, second guessing is one of my favorite hobbies.
Speaker 2:Oh, I've gotten better at it but it's a lot.
Speaker 1:Okay, wait, you spoke up. You obviously co-host this and you co-wrote this with Lindsay, who's your best friend, and you talk about friendship audits in the book too, and I think that's important. You talk about it on the podcast as well. How have you kept such a healthy relationship with Lindsay when you guys are best friends, co-writers, co-hosts on the podcast and basically business partners? Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So first just to explain the friendship audit which you mentioned. So for anyone that doesn't know, in the book I talk about doing a friendship audit, and the reason why I talk about this is because so many women that I work with and know in our community and I would even say myself are women that want to do it all. I want to be everyone's best friend, I want to be everyone's first call, I want to show up for everyone. I want to be the friend that gets you flowers, that plans your bachelorette, that just does everything, and that part of me could essentially spend my whole life just being the best friend in the whole world. And then there's also the perspective of there's a lot of there's only so little time and there's a lot of people that we could spend it with. We want to make sure we're spending it with the right people, and I realized when I was in Los Angeles that I was sometimes spending my time with people that just wanted to spend time with me, but I didn't really feel the best around them, and that I wasn't actually spending the most amount of time of my life with the people that I love the most and that the people that I love the most weren't getting the most of me, they weren't being my number one priority. I think parents can often think of this, where it's like, you know, the kids are the number one priority, but oftentimes the kids are not prioritized. So when reality sets in of like, how am I actually spending my time? Am I actually spending it with the friends that make me feel the best, the people that I love the most, I thought about something called a friendship audit where I really got clear about, like, my A tier friends, my B tier friends and my C tier friends. And it doesn't need to be something you share with anyone. People don't need to know, but you can just know in your mind, like, who are the people that have intimate access to me, who are the people that I will do anything for, who are the people that I will really show up for and who are the people that I will have clearing conversations with, I will speak my truth to. And then B, who are the people I like to go out with, I like to party, I like to see once a month or once every other month that I'm like really love, but maybe we haven't like spent as much time together, maybe we don't have a situation that makes us closer and then see friends, social friends, whatever. So the friendship audit just helps you get really clear and crystallized.
Speaker 2:So my friendship with Lindsay, so she's one of my soulmates, you know she's one of the most powerful relationships of my life. So I think first it's a soul thing. I think you know what it's like, you know with your fiance, you know what it's like with your friends, like so much of it's truly the soul, frequency and experience of being two soulmates that were able to co-create something. And then I think the second thing about our relationship that's kept us so strong, from business partners to having dreams together, you know, working together for 10 years is the fact that we have a lot of freedom in our relationship. So we've never been friends that felt like I knew better than her, she knew better than me, I had to do what she wanted to do, she had to do what I wanted to do.
Speaker 2:Our paths have been very different and as we've grown and evolved we've been able to stay really close but also stay really free. So when she wanted to move to New York to be with her husband, I was like cool, you got it, like I'm happy for you. Obviously, I'm sad when I wanted to do my thing with my business. She was able to be happy for me and free, and within the freedom that's created by creating a really secure attachment through having clearing conversations, through showing up for one another, through honesty, through transparency, through like shared values. So there's a lot of aspects to our relationship that I'm so grateful serve as a template for me and my new relationships, because I think for a lot of women, female relationships can be hard.
Speaker 1:Yes, so that's okay. So then somebody might be listening to this going I want that relationship that Lindsay and Krista have, but I feel like there's no one in my life that fills that bucket, like there's no one in my life that fills that bucket. And so if I do a friendship audit, what happens if no one's left? Because I hear women, especially closer to my age not your age but saying like I lost a lot of friendships, I don't have as much time. I want that special friendship, but how do I even make friends? Like what do you think?
Speaker 2:Yeah, the friendship thing is huge. Make friends, like what do you think? Yeah, the friendship thing is huge. I think, for me, first, when we don't have the friends that we want or the friends that we're looking for, I think we have to become the friend that we want. You know, it's just like relationships and dating Like you want to have this like top tier, 10 out of 10 person Like are you a 10 out of 10 woman? And that doesn't mean you're the most beautiful or attractive, but a woman that knows her worth and her value and like brings a lot to the table. Maybe it's intelligence, maybe it's charisma, maybe it's, you know, power, whatever your thing is. It's like you have to bring to the table what you're looking to receive.
Speaker 2:So I have sculpted myself into a woman that's worthy of friendships and relationships. I spend a lot of time with myself. I pray, I do my own work. I relationships. I spend a lot of time with myself, I pray, I do my own work. I, like am always in a process of something and I love people really deeply. But I remember periods in time in my life where I didn't feel met by women, I didn't feel met by friends, and it's really painful and lonely because there is that desire for us to connect. And when you do have female friends, it's the most healing thing on earth. Female friendships are just incredible. So I would say, first doing your own work to really become an amazing woman, that's worthy of amazing friendships.
Speaker 2:And I know that sounds harsh, but it's true. You have to become the person that's going to have the energy and vibration that attracts those relationships and then I would say, to invest in the friendships you do have. I think sometimes we're so busy looking outside to be like I want that new friend, I want that new thing. It's like try and meet your old friends with the new version of you. Try and deepen that relationship. Try and have a more open, honest, vulnerable conversation with them. Try and bring a new energy to that relationship and see if you guys can evolve and grow together.
Speaker 1:That's great advice. I have an old friend of mine. She and I have known each other since we were 10 years old and we would be very sarcastic with each other because we've known each other since we were 10. And a few years ago we had this deep conversation of you're kind of hurting my feelings, and she was like you're kind of hurting my feelings too. And I was shocked and here I was thinking I've outgrown maybe that friendship. But then I realized we both grew but we were both meeting each other at that lower level because we assumed that's what we were both wanting. And once we just freed each other and said, no, I kind of like the new version that you are and vice versa, like now we have a whole new relationship. So you'd be surprised when you become more vulnerable and you think you've outgrown somebody. Maybe it's just a conversation to sort of clear the air is all that's needed.
Speaker 2:Oh, I love that I think in romantic relationships, familial relationships, friendship relationships, you always have to meet people at that Like you're. I think we subconsciously meet them at the version we met, when we assume that, oh, they're like this, they're always sarcastic, they're always joking and it's like no, like you've had so much life happen, she's had so much life happen. And so when we can kind of pull back the idea of the person as who we thought they were or the person who we want them to be, and allow them to meet us differently, it's such a beautiful thing Like that's true intimacy, like how much closer did you guys feel after expressing that it's wild?
Speaker 1:I just, I really do feel, and now I feel more open. I'm able to tell her a lot of other things too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, those, those oh my gosh, the vulnerability and the intimacy of sharing that with someone is such a gift.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So powerful and potent and it takes your relationship to the next level. But I think what you guys did was so beautiful, was it's like you know? Oh, I realized that really hurts, like that doesn't feel good. And it was never passive, aggressive. It was never, you know, you're you do. It was never in an energy of blame or shame. It was like, oh, I'm, I'm just not. That doesn't feel good. I'm saying how I feel, I'm acknowledging how I feel and I'm letting you in on the opportunity to help support me in feeling better.
Speaker 1:Speaking of vulnerability, I think one of the things I love about you and our walks and just talking is not only how much we laugh. We laugh so hard my old dating life. But I love how open you are. But and again, you talked about so many different things things in the book career, spirituality, your family, the shoulds of our lives but what is the most difficult thing for you personally that you had to sort of open up about. That was scary.
Speaker 2:It's a great question. Um, I didn't talk about my divorce in this because it wasn't like necessarily part of that, so I remember omitting that. But I think the hardest part was talking about the body chapter. So in the book I talk about the body. I talk about our relationship as women to our bodies. I believe it's one of my most important things. I speak about because so many women believe that their life happens on the other side of their body, being a different way, being thinner, being curvier, whatever the things are, and so many women hold themselves back, make themselves miserable, don't live their own lives because they don't feel like they're worthy of it, because their body is in a certain way.
Speaker 2:So I was someone that again struggled with my body my whole life. So the first part of that chapter I talk about, when I was in Mexico I went to find this diet drug that like was told to lose, that I told I would lose weight on it. It was a prescription drug. I had to go to a pharmacy and I bought like three months supply of this prescription drug that I'd have to get a prescription for in America, in Mexico, and I was like plotting all my trips back to Mexico to start getting this drug, because once you started taking it, you had to take it for the rest of your life. This was pre-Osempic days, so it was actually a thyroid medication and it was for your thyroid, but it's supposed to make you lose weight, or I read it on Reddit something crazy, like the mind of someone who struggles with their body is so insane. You just go to the ends of the earth.
Speaker 2:So sharing that story was really um, go to the ends of the earth. So sharing that story was really um, I just made me sad of how far I would go and I've never shared it before and I never ended up taking the drugs, thank God. Um, so I'm very grateful for that. But I just was like, wow, that was like a very, very deep low for me and very embarrassing.
Speaker 2:And is that why you started the metamorphosis? Yeah, yeah, so basically, metamorphosis is my body transformation program. So I believe that to change our bodies, we need to change our minds, and so in metamorphosis, it's like a spiritual approach to weight loss and loving our bodies, and that's a lot of the reason why it was because my journey was so painful and I realized that the thing that changed my body, because my body's transformed since my divorce a few years ago was that I was feeling my feelings, I was speaking my truth, I was not associating food as a coping mechanism or to numb and I was being more present and allowing with life, and that freedom and liberation and relationship that I had to food and my body and God was what really helped transform me into living in a body that I love and I celebrate and I'm excited by, and I want that for every woman.
Speaker 1:Well, so then, what changed from the, what the? From the girl who was going to Mexico she was going to Cabo every three months for this, these pills, to what like what slapped you in the face? Yeah, and change that.
Speaker 2:So I remember I was walking across. It was just a normal day and I was walking across my kitchen and I was in my normal pattern of my morning routine. How many calories am I going to have today? What is the food I'm going to have to be in those calories? What is the workout I'm going to do to burn those calories off? How many steps am I taking? How many macros? I was just in my Tetris game math experience of deciding all my numbers. How much did I weigh? I just got off the scale. How much should I weigh? How much do I need to weigh for this?
Speaker 2:And I was just in the loop of it and there was a moment of like, click of consciousness, of like, oh, wow, like this has been my life and I think at this time I'm going to accept that I'm going to live a life like this, that for the rest of my life I'm going to fully be stuck in this dynamic, and that surrender was like a true surrender, like I truly was, like I give up, like I completely give up.
Speaker 2:This is, this is just what it is. Maybe next lifetime I'll live in a body that I love, I'll feel free, and that surrender was like something I didn't plan for but was the most powerful thing because it created the spaciousness around it so that I could transform and evolve, and it allowed possibility because I could see the truth of what I was doing and what I was going through. And then, after that, doing internal family systems, which is parts work. It's a psychotherapy technique that I practice with my clients and I do all the time. It's so powerful for healing your relationship with your body, and then finding books like Women, food and God is one of my favorite books of all time. Doing work on the mother wound, I was really taking it from a more spiritual perspective than the strategy because I'd lived in that my whole life. So finally adding that spiritual element was really what helped change everything.
Speaker 1:Do you feel like everyone has their thing? Like for what? Some? For you, could it be food, for somebody, it could be shopping or gambling or just fill in the blank? Do you feel like I told you on your podcast, for me for a long time it was drinking, because I and then one day I'm like I'm so tired of thinking about drinking whether or not I'm going to drink. I'm not going to drink If I go like I was so freaking tired of it that I was just enough already, enough of using something outside of my own body to escape my mind.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, oh, my gosh, I do think, you know I wouldn't say everybody, cause I don't know but I do think we humans, we all have something shopping, gambling, porn, um, drinking, you know, drugs, all of these things because we as children, for most of us, we're never taught to feel our feelings. No, don't cry, don't worry, you know stuff. Oh, here's this toy, here's this thing. So for our lives we've been distracted from feeling, entertainment, parents, you know, trying to distract us all of these things. So it's a natural inclination for us to want to distract from feeling. For me that was food. I also found food as a really stable place to numb and to cope. If my parents were going crazy and I couldn't find regulation with them, I could regulate with food. Food's an amazing regulation tool. So I think we find our things to regulate and numb and I think in our life it's kind of our work to try and break out of those cycles.
Speaker 1:Absolutely, and in addition I mean you seriously have like 45 different jobs. I do retreats, so you-. It's like embarrassing. No, I love it. I love it. I hate it because I never get to see you, but I love that you're always doing something fun. You do these amazing retreats. How, in all the time that you spend this really intimate time with women, what's um, what's something that keeps getting like that people are feeling that sort of uh, like a theme that you feel like women are are grappling with.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, um yeah. So, for anyone listening, I work one-on-one with women as a coach, and then I also do retreats in places like Ibiza and Switzerland, and they're really luxury and just really deep and authentic and beautiful, and I'm it's like my favorite work to do. I would say the thing that I see women struggling most with right now is the desire to be in their feminine. So many women right now feel like they're burnt out and they feel like they're living their lives and they're masculine and they deeply desire to be connected to their feminine, to their essence, and there's this, this disconnect, where they're not feeling safe enough to be in their feminine, they're not feeling the ability to be in their feminine, and so it's so. It's definitely the biggest theme that I see.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I told you I went to Hoffman back in 23. Gosh, and one of the biggest things that I took away from it is that soft is strong, because for me, hard was strong and I was hard all of my life and I think that once I was able to drop down into my feminine, my whole life changed. I was able to ask for help, become softer with my friends, with my family, my parents. I forgave them, you know, because they're human as well and everything changed when I was, I just stopped carrying that weight and I feel like we are all doing that and it's exhausting.
Speaker 2:Yes, I think I'm not usually like blame the system person, but I do think that our system does not set up women to be well. Women are now overeducated than men. We're out earning men. We're not only the breadwinners now in a lot of cases but we're also taking care of the kids. We're also maintaining the spiritual connection in the relationship, like women are very attuned, so they're kind of monitoring the health of the relationship. We're also like there as mothers, there as sisters, there as friends.
Speaker 2:So the kind of natural inclination for women to be community-based, socially oriented, to be givers, is sort of being exacerbated and taken advantage of by the current system.
Speaker 2:And women are just finding themselves like having no energy, no time for themselves, feeling depleted, feeling feeling like they can't be soft because the system doesn't really allow people. If you're in the normal matrix system nine to five it doesn't really allow you to be soft. You know, if you were in a corporate job I was in the corporate world I would cry all the time. But I'm like I'm like not well, so I would just cry all the time. But I'm like I'm like not well so I would just cry all the time. But it's not normal to be crying at work. It's not normal to be emoting and expressing your feelings. We're on a system and cycle that doesn't support a women's cycle. You know women have 28 day cycles, men have daily cycles. Like we're just kind of not really setting women up for success here and I think it's been really heartbreaking for me for women to see themselves um never living in a life that they love because they feel like they have to do so much for other people.
Speaker 1:Oh, especially for me, like growing up with my parents are Cuban and that's that's what we were. That was celebrated for you to abandon yourself constantly for your husband, the children, the house, the dog, the cat, the bird, your job, and then at the end of the day, if you have like a minute, then you could go take a bath, Like what.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I remember I'll never forget Oprah. I think it was in the nineties and she had a show on where this person was talking about to the women in the audience and she was like you guys should put yourself first, you need to fill your cup up first, you need to take care of yourself first. And all the women in the audience started booing at her because they were like, no, we can't. We have to take care of the kids and the family and all this stuff. And they were so upset by that concept and that idea and it's so powerful because I think we're seeing that now, where we're understanding that we need to take care of ourselves and we need to find balance and we need to find, you know, purpose and we need to find boundaries and more clarity and things.
Speaker 2:But, um, I also just on the feminine thing as a second point. I also want to be mindful where women are using everything they can to like feel like they're doing something wrong. I think women have this natural inclination to always want to be better, to do better, to feel like there's something wrong with them, and I think sometimes the conversation around the feminine makes them feel like they're always doing something wrong. Where I also want to kind of alleviate that, where it's like the feminine is created with safety within yourself of course, but a masculine also can provide that safety really well, and I don't know a lot of masculines in this moment that are really at the point where they're holding women in a healthy masculine frame, and so there is a lot of other factors that are not really supporting them in their femininity.
Speaker 1:I mean that's a whole other conversation, that's like an entire other podcast that I could talk for hours about. So I love that you started the book sort of talking about how you and Lindsay started the podcast, because you started with like a $25 microphone, if I'm remembering it correctly, like in the closet, and then you tried to do something at a restaurant and I think a lot of people wait until they have the perfect camera, the perfect this, the perfect weight, the perfect outfit to do the things, and I love that you just did it and obviously it's a huge success. But I know the book is not just for somebody who's turning almost 30. So, in your words, who is almost 30? Who is this book for?
Speaker 2:I think it's for anyone that feels behind in life, that feels like they don't have the job, the purpose, the career, they don't have the relationship, they don't have that thing that they're kind of here and looking for, and it's just the reminder that you're not behind. You're becoming, because so many of us feel like we're doing something wrong and we need to be somewhere that we're not. I still feel like that today with the life that I live. I still feel like I'm behind in a lot of different areas. So for it's people that feel that way and it's anyone that has a relationship with change. You know this book is about the Saturn return period, but all the information in it is all the lessons and things that I've learned over the years hosting a podcast. In it is all the lessons and things that I've learned over the years hosting a podcast interviewing some of the best and brightest you. Recently we have past the mic sections from people like Mel Robbins, jay Shetty, glennon Doyle.
Speaker 1:I was like what? So, he's talking about past the mic. It's just these little blurbs in the book that it says past the mic and it's these quotes from people that were on the podcast. But it's not. I mean, it's some pretty amazing people and you have had, you guys have interviewed probably every single person in this world, in, you know, the spiritual mindset growth world.
Speaker 2:So out of all these people that you had, I just love that you you've went back and shared the nuggets, so it's kind of like the best of your podcast yes, it's the best and most of the people that we have quoted are like 40s and 50s, so it's not like you're going to read a quote from a 30-something. Most of them are people that are older, that have been through it and that have seen it, and we really also wanted people to have a better relationship with change, better relationships with their body, better friendships. Better relationships with their body, better friendships, better relationships to purpose, god and their soul. It's a very meaty, hefty book. If you know me, I'm not a light person. I'm super deep. I'm always going to get to it. You are fun. I'm so fun yeah, I'm actually, but we're fun together.
Speaker 1:Well, you're a lot of fun, but that's I mean your personality, and I haven't met Lindsay yet, but your personality came out so much in the book of being raw, still having light moments, and I think everyone is going to benefit by getting the book. I'm so excited for you. One last thing, though you were just talking about how you are still dealing sometimes with the not doing enough, and I was just talking to my best friend, trish, about it this morning, where I go from this ebb and flow, where I'm like let it flow, just receive from the universe, to why isn't this person calling? I should call them back, I should email them right now. And so do you deal with that same sort of juxtaposition in your life as well? If yours is by?
Speaker 2:the hour, mine is by the minute. This whole process with the book has been a tornado of emotions and feelings of I'm surrendered, it's all good, let God show me the way. And then the next second I'm like I am absolutely not doing anything right. I am absolutely not doing anything right. This is, you know, that journey I'm on right now and I think it'll kill me because it's such a tough one. But that's such a deep question. You know, the idea and thought of surrendering in life is not small, like we as people have believed that we've created our lives and our experience and our existence and in a lot of ways we do co-create. But to surrender truly is not a small feat and I think that's my biggest struggle right now is my deep desire to surrender. I really want to surrender my life over and just have more miracles and magic and have more of what's meant for me come for me. But I also want it to look exactly how I want it to look like.
Speaker 1:So it's like what is that? I know I've I struggle, want it to look exactly how I want it to look like. So it's like what is that? I know I struggle with it too, but I realized in talking to Trish this morning what we were saying is when I embody the person that is in the future, when I really live that woman of the ideal life, is where I could be more calm. It's when I'm acting erratic and making silly decisions is when I start feeling like I have to push and hustle yes From fear.
Speaker 2:It's that, like you know, and that's that when we talk about the femininity, that's the maiden energy. The maiden energy is like people pleasing have to make it all happen. You have to like, force it and push it and you know the, the true feminine is in receptive mode. But I feel like it's more about just alignment. I'm like when I'm like, okay, how can I do this? How can I do that? I'm like I just need to truly get aligned, because things that happen for me happen when I'm aligned, the things that are meant for me happen at that time.
Speaker 1:Well, so then, how do you, how do you Krista align yourself?
Speaker 2:Prayer prayer every morning. So there's a really specific period in time for your brain when you're waking up in the morning and right before bed it's really primed for information, it's primed for affirmations. It's primed so it's very tender. You don't want to get on your phone because it can take in information and really apply it to things. So I get up and pray right away and sometimes that's affirmation, sometimes that's books that I read, sometimes that's just me with God and that really helps align me because it just kind of clears anything that's in the way between me and what I came here to do. And then removing toxic relationships and friendships and people from my life that keep me from my alignment, I think is really really huge as well. I love you so much.
Speaker 1:Obviously, if you're listening, you're going to get in touch with Krista on Instagram. I'll have a link to the book, her retreats, her podcast, all of the podcasts I love you.
Speaker 1:Thank you so much for being on the show, thank you for your friendship, thank you for creating this book and also just being such an inspiration for me. You know, and I think a lot of times we don't tell our friends how much they inspire you, and you inspire me so much to live a better life and to think much bigger than I sometimes allow myself. So thank you.
Speaker 2:Oh, man, you inspire me with your joy, with your clarity, with your willingness. I just adore you and for me it takes a lot for people to get in. I'm very open and warm and friendly, but for people to get in Like I'm very open and warm and friendly, but for people to really get in with me is very specific and you have that perfect formula that I allow in where you're like funny and playful and deep and real and authentic and I'm like you. Can you get access to my heart?
Speaker 1:I love you. Oh, yes, everybody. Thank you for listening, please, thank you, guys. You're not already following her? Go get the book. She's also going on a book tour all across the country, so I'll. Where's the book tour on your website? Can you tell everybody where to find it?
Speaker 2:Almost 30.com, you can find everything we're going to Nashville, new York, los Angeles and maybe someplace else that I forget right now.
Speaker 1:So and then also, you have the best promo codes. Where are you all your pro? You said you have.
Speaker 2:Where are the promo codes Just at almost 30.com slash partners, but you can just honestly try almost 30 at any place. We've we've worked with like hundreds of brands over the years that are like the best in health and wellness, so people literally just use almost 30 all the time at random places.
Speaker 1:There you go. That's your life hack. I know, yes, that's the redesigning life hack.
Speaker 2:I love you. I love you. Talk to you later.