Soul Joy: Ditch Burnout and Fall in Love with Life

Setting Limits from the Heart: The Throat Chakra Connection

• Dr. Julie Merriman • Season 2 • Episode 14

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Setting boundaries isn't just a skill—it's a vital energy practice connected to your throat chakra that prevents burnout and sustains your capacity to help others.

When your throat chakra—the energy center of communication and self-expression located in your throat—is balanced and flowing, you speak your truth confidently, express needs clearly, and establish limits that honor your wellbeing. But when blocked, you'll likely struggle to say "no," feel perpetually unheard, or even develop physical symptoms in your throat.

For helping professionals, this connection proves profoundly important. We readily absorb others' emotional energy while giving so much of ourselves. Without clear boundaries, we inevitably burn out, become resentful, and diminish our effectiveness. Your throat chakra operates as both your voice and your protective shield, allowing you to process and release absorbed energies rather than letting them overwhelm your system.

Strengthening these boundaries requires consistent practice: pausing before speaking to ensure what you're saying is true, kind, and necessary; using "I" statements that express your needs without blaming; engaging in vocal activities like singing or humming; visualizing bright blue energy at your throat; identifying your boundary triggers; and giving yourself explicit permission to say "no" without guilt. Remember that saying "no" to one request means saying "yes" to your own wellbeing and long-term capacity to serve effectively.

The Boundary Blueprint framework offers a practical structure for crafting clear, assertive statements: acknowledge the other person's needs, express your own needs using "I" language, state the boundary clearly, and when appropriate, offer an alternative solution. This approach honors both yourself and the other person while establishing necessary limits.

Building strong boundaries requires self-awareness, courage, and compassion for yourself. When you prioritize your boundaries, you become more effective, more present, and ultimately more resilient in your important work. Think of your throat chakra as the volume knob for your personal power—when properly balanced, you'll speak your truth with confidence and establish the clear limits that allow you to truly thrive.

Subscribe to the Soul Joy podcast and join our email list at juliemerriman-phd.com for weekly bonus PDF activities to support your journey toward sustainable self-care.

Speaker 1:

Hey y'all, I'm Dr Julie Merriman and welcome to Soul Joy. Today we're diving deep into a topic that's absolutely crucial for your well-being and effectiveness boundaries and how they connect to a powerful energy center within us, the throat chakra. Because y'all this is a very necessary component of holistic, sustainable self-care, also known as wellness. All right, all right, welcome back to the soul joy podcast, the show dedicated to supporting you, the incredible individuals who are dedicated to helping others. You've dedicated your lives to helping others. Thank you for that.

Speaker 1:

So we're going to start with a little home chat. As always and this is kind of an interesting subject my husband and I just happened upon it, I've told y'all we're on, we do that monthly kit to kind of liven up the bedroom, if you will. And anyway, this month it was about Tantra and not the Neo kind of stuff. That's kind of, I'm gonna say, out there, not to offend anyone, for me it was a bit out there but the, the old, the, the ancient tantra, where you connect with each other so deeply in your relationship, your heart to heart, breath to breath, um, and it might, you know, spice things up in the bedroom for sure, but it's certainly going to spice up your relationship. But I'm thinking in the future, here on the podcast, I may delve into that a little deeper, because I think it does help prevent burnout and compassion fatigue and all those things we're trying to prevent as professional helpers, but okay so, moving on from prevent as professional helpers, but okay so, moving on from that, professional helpers.

Speaker 1:

This podcast is dedicated to preventing and overcoming the occupational hazards of the career. We chose specifically burnout, compassion fatigue and vicarious trauma. But, as I always say, this is this podcast is for anyone. If you're not a professional helper, you're welcome here. So as professional helpers and you know it doesn't matter, you could be a therapist, you could be a social worker, a nurse, a doctor, an educator, any role where you're giving so much of yourself you know firsthand the challenges of maintaining healthy boundaries. That's what we're talking about today. As you well know, it's easy to blur lines, to overextend, to take on too much, all in the name of caring. But what happens when we consistently operate without clear boundaries? We burn out, we become resentful and our ability to genuinely help diminishes. I mean, this podcast is based on the book I wrote called Soul Joy a 12-week guide for overcoming burnout and compassion fatigue, and y'all that was written based on my own journey to crash and burn and try to screw my life up. Not on purpose. I wasn't functioning how I needed to, and this episode about boundaries really, really gets to the heart of how we need this to prevent burnout and function at our best.

Speaker 1:

So let's talk about the throat chakra. The throat chakra is very important as we look at sustainable, holistic self-care. My book is based on the seven chakras and we've gone through. If you're new to the podcast, please hop back and listen to previous episodes, because we started the root chakra and we're now to the throat chakra. We have two more to go, but the meaning of the throat chakra is pure or purification.

Speaker 1:

It's located at the center of your throat and this is your energy hub for communication, self-expression and speaking your truth. So think about it. When your throat chakra is balanced and flowing, you can express your needs clearly, set limits with confidence and communicate authentically. But y'all, when it's blocked, when it's out of balance, you're gonna find yourself struggling, maybe struggling to say no. Perhaps you feel unheard or even experiencing physical symptoms like a sore throat or thyroid issue. Now I've spent several weeks on the throat chakra and if this is something that's really causing your ears to perk up. Go back a couple of episodes and start from the beginning.

Speaker 1:

Y'all for helping professionals, the connection between boundaries and the throat chakra is incredibly profound. Speaking your no. A strong throat chakra empowers you to say no when you need to, without guilt or apology, because when we do that, we lessen that no. This isn't about being unhelpful. It's about recognizing your capacity and protecting your energy so you can be genuinely helpful when you're truly available. How often do you find yourself saying yes out of obligation I'm pausing here because I've got a whole episode on this Even when your inner voice is screaming hell, no. That's your throat chakra trying to tell you something. Clear communication of expectations. Okay.

Speaker 1:

So healthy boundaries aren't just about saying no. They're also about clearly communicating your availability, your scope of practice, your professional limits. When your throat chakra is open, you can articulate these expectations with confidence and clarity, preventing misunderstandings and protecting your time and energy. Right. So next we have authentic self-expression. Boundaries are a form of self-expression, that's right. Boundaries are a form of self-expression. They communicate your value of self-expression. They communicate your value, your needs and your professional integrity. When you honor your boundaries, you're honoring yourself this authenticity rooted in a healthy throat chakra makes you more effective. You're a more effective and sustainable helper effective You're a more effective and sustainable helper. Okay, so what about protecting your energy field?

Speaker 1:

As a helping professional, you often absorb a lot of emotional energy from those you serve. You know, it's true. You felt it. You're exhausted at the end of the day because you've given all you can. You take home others energies because you don't have a ritual in place at the end of the day to get rid of those. A strong throat chakra acts as a protective shield, allowing you to process and release this energy without letting it overwhelm you. When you struggle to vocalize your needs or express your discomfort, that energy can get stuck and we don't want that. So how can we cultivate a healthier throat chakra and strengthen our boundaries? Okay, so here's a few practical tips. As always, I have an activity for you with a PDF at the end of the podcast, but here's a few practical tips.

Speaker 1:

You need to practice mindful communication. Before you speak, pause. Ask yourself is what I'm about to say true? Is it kind, is it necessary and, most importantly, does it honor my needs and boundaries? Okay, you want to use I statements? I know we talk about this with our clients all the time. We need to practice what we're preaching, right? Instead of saying you always ask too much of me. Try, hmm, I feel overwhelmed when I have multiple urgent requests at once and I need to prioritize. This empowers you to express your needs without blaming, because we're responsible for ourself, right, okay, you can find your voice literally.

Speaker 1:

Engage in activities that help you express yourself vocally. This could be singing, chanting, speaking up in meetings, even just humming. These practices can help clear energetic blockages in your throat. You want to visualize and affirm. Spend a few minutes each day visualizing a vibrant, clear, blue light at your throat. Affirm to yourself I speak my truth with clarity and confidence. I set healthy boundaries with ease. My voice is heard and respected. Easy, breezy, everyday practice.

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You want to identify your boundary triggers. Pay attention to situations or individuals that consistently make you feel like your boundaries are being challenged, because there's something there. Once you recognize the triggers, you can proactively plan how you're going to respond in a way that honors you and your needs. And, as always, y'all, as professional helpers, seek supervision and peer support. Don't underestimate the power of discussing boundary challenges with a trusted colleague or supervisor. They can offer really valuable insights, validation and strategies, and you want to give yourself permission to say no. As I said, I have a whole podcast on this, but just in this moment, giving yourself permission to say no, this is perhaps the hardest one for some of us.

Speaker 1:

Remember, saying no to one request means saying yes to your own well-being, to your capacity to serve effectively in the long run and to your personal life, and y'all. It's not selfish, it's sustainable, and we are practicing holistic, sustainable self-care, known as wellness. Okay, so, building strong boundaries is an ongoing practice and it requires a lot of self-awareness. It's not one and done. It requires courage and it requires compassion for yourself. When you prioritize your boundaries, you're not just protecting yourself, you're actually y'all. This is important. You're actually becoming more effective, more present and, ultimately, more resilient as a helper. Think of your throat chakra as a volume knob for your personal power. When that's cranked up and balanced, man, y'all, you're going to speak your truth, you're going to express your needs and establish those clear limits that allow you to thrive in your incredibly important life and work.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so before we go on, I want to invite you to subscribe to my email list to get the weekly podcast emailed to you and I include a bonus PDF that I create just for you of the weekly activity. All you have to do is hop on over to my website to get on the email list, wwwjuliemerrimanphdcom, and, while you're there, grab a copy of my book, soul Joy. Okay, quick drink. The activity I have planned for you today I call Boundary Blueprint and Throat Chakra Activation Activity. I did an activation activity last week, but this one goes a little deeper Y'all. It's designed to help you deepen your understanding of boundaries and the throat chakra, and I know, as helpers we have a master's degree or PhD in this stuff. But we can preach instead of practice, and I'm inviting you to practice Understanding boundaries and the throat chakra. That's going to empower you to put healthy practices into action.

Speaker 1:

Take your time with each section, be honest with yourself and remember that setting boundaries is an act of self-care and professional integrity. So, part one and again, email me if you'd like this PDF, but I really would invite you to hop onto my email list. You have this whole workbook I've created for you, but if you're driving, just listen and think. Maybe come back to it when you get to the house. But part one, reflecting on your current boundaries. I want you to think about your professional and personal life. Where do you find boundary setting most challenging? Use these prompts to reflect.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so where do you feel overextended or drained the most? You know your workload, client expectations, colleagues, personal requests, maybe family demands. An example I often take work home. Clients call me after hours. I say yes to too many committees. So reflect on that. Professional, were you overextended? Personal, were you overextended? What boundary is being crossed or is difficult to set, crossed or is difficult to set, and how do you currently feel or react to that? How does this impact your energy and well-being? So I mean just off the top of my head y'all, if we, we, we work whatever hours you set. You own your calendar. You work those hours. Work stays at work. Clients have 911s. You have set in your intake paperwork. What happens after hours if a client has an emergency? And committee meetings will suck the life out of you? I have been an associate dean. I've sat through those meetings. Oh my Atlanta, no is a complete sentence.

Speaker 1:

Where do you need to regain, re-empower yourself? Where do you feel overextended or drained? What specific requests or situations consistently make you feel uncomfortable, resentful or guilty, but you still agree to them. Reflect on that. I'm not going to say why, because we know how. That not supposed to say why, that's blaming, but I mean think about it. But I mean think about it. Your time is the one thing you cannot buy more of. Own it, celebrate it, empower yourself. What are the consequences when you don't set a boundary in these situations? Do you get exhausted? Are you resentful? Is there a diminished work quality? Is there personal stress? Do you feel unheard? Write your reflection there and the consequences of the bound, consistently saying finding yourself in a situation where you're uncomfortable, resentful, guilty, or you still agree to do something you don't want to do. Okay, so that's reflecting on your current boundaries. How's that going? And next we're going to segue into the throat chakra connection. So let's connect these boundary challenges to your throat chakra, of course.

Speaker 1:

Remember that, your center of communication and self-expression. When you struggle to say no or express your needs, what physical sensations do you notice in your throat or neck area? Is there a lump, tightness? Your voice feels weak, shallow breathing? When I do this with clients, it fascinates me how often there's a lump or they feel like there's something in their throat they can't swallow. Reflect on that. When you struggle to say no or express your needs. What's the physical sensation? How does your internal voice, your intuition, that gut feeling gut feeling, we all have it try to communicate with you when a boundary is being crossed or needs to be set, and do you typically listen? What's your reflection? I can think, oh, of so many mistakes I've made in life because I was not listening to my intuition. My body was screaming at me and I didn't listen. Think about a time you successfully set a boundary. How did it feel to express yourself and and what physical sensations did you notice? Okay, so reflect on that.

Speaker 1:

This next part is a bit complicated, to just tell you, I do hope you hop on the email list so I can get you this PDF. But part three I mean I can talk to you about it, ain't no thing. Part three drafting your boundary statements. Now let's draft some clear, assertive and concise boundary statements for those challenging situations that you identified back in part one, and remember to use I statements. So I want you to choose one to three situations that you're struggling to set boundaries with or the boundary you've set isn't working for you, and for each draft a boundary statement using this structure.

Speaker 1:

Acknowledge this is optional but helpful for softening. I understand you need, I understand you want, I understand. And then the I statement of a need or limit I need to ensure I have time for, or I am unable to, I am unable to. And then the clear boundary so I can't take on a new project until next month, or my office hours are 9 to 5. Clear boundary. And then an alternative solution we do this in play therapy. Right, I'm not for hitting, but Bobo is. I mean, this is therapy. We do this. An alternative solution. Now, it's optional, but if appropriate, do so. Perhaps we can revisit this next week or I can refer you to. So that is your boundary statement. That's the blueprint. So that is your boundary statement. That's the blueprint.

Speaker 1:

So let's I'm going to give you an example. Situation one let's say client calls me after hours for non-emergencies. Draft the boundary statement. I understand you have questions and I want to support you To ensure I'm available and refreshed for all my clients. My office hours are 9 to 5, monday through Friday, or whatever is your, your, whatever yours might be for urgent matters outside of these hours, please use whatever protocol you have designated. Refer them to that. Okay, that makes sense, right you. That's a boundary statement. I've done all those things. I've acknowledged, I've got an I statement. There's a clear boundary. I've given an alternative. Now it's your turn and empower yourself. If you do so, write it down and shoot me an email. I would love to support you in this. And then we're going to move to part four. We've gone one through three, now to part four. That's that throat chakra activation and practice.

Speaker 1:

This section y'all focuses on. You've got to physically and energetically prepare your throat chakra to speak your boundaries. So do a vocal warm-up. You gently hum for 30 seconds, focusing on that vibration in your throat. Do some gentle neck rolls Forward, backward, side to side. Release tension and practice some gentle ah, I don't want to hurt your ears Sounds gradually increasing the volume. And then step into your affirmation, practice Finding a quiet space, closing your eyes if you want, placing your hand gently on your throat, taking a few deep breaths, inhaling that calm blue light deep into your throat, exhaling any tension, repeating affirmations out loud or in a strong whisper several times. My voice is strong and clear. I speak my truth with confidence and compassion. It is safe for me to set healthy boundaries. I am worthy of respect and rest and then your boundary statement rehearsal.

Speaker 1:

Choose one of your drafted boundary statements from part three and practice saying it out loud several times. Notice how does it feel in your body, especially your throat. Do you sound confident or hesitant? Adjust your tone and wording until it feels authentic and assertive, not aggressive. Last week we talked about communication styles Assertive Imagine you're speaking to the person. You need to set the boundary with Practice, making eye contact, even if it's just with your reflection.

Speaker 1:

Okay so conclusion and next steps here. Okay so I want to congratulate you on taking a really important step towards setting stronger boundaries. You're going to feel better. I don't want you out there crashing and burning. I don't want anyone to live through what I did, and a more balanced throat chakra is going to serve you Y'all.

Speaker 1:

You got to start small. We're not going to feel pressured to implement all the boundaries at once. You pick one, commit to that and practice. Then go to the next. You're patient with yourself. Setting boundaries y'all is a skill that improves with practice. There might be some discomfort. We embrace that. But this discomfort isn't just yours, maybe for the other person too. Can't control that. New dynamics need to be established, and that is sometimes really all the time time, if you think about it can be uncomfortable, but that's okay. You're going to celebrate successes, acknowledge yourself every time you successfully set a boundary, no matter how small, and you're going to continue reflecting regularly by checking in with yourself. How are your boundaries feeling? Are they serving you? Is your throat chakra open and clear? Remember, by owning your own limits, you become a more sustainable, effective and truly resilient helper. Ha, awesome. Okay, that's it for today. Thank you for joining me. Remember your well-being is paramount. Until next time, speak your truth, honor your boundaries and continue doing the amazing work you do.