Ditching Extremes

This week Bree is talking about ditching extremes. Extreme habits, extreme diets, and the all-or-nothing mentality. Find balance in your fitness journey and how to create an environment that you actually enjoy so you can stay consistent and see results.

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Are you looking for a space where you will learn to improve your mental strength, emotional health, and heal your insecurities from the inside out? Take the first step to living a more meaningful life with the Better Me with Body by Free podcast. I'm your host, Free. I'm a certified personal trainer, entrepreneur, and mother of three. I've helped empower thousands of women to take action through fitness, nutrition, meditation, personal development, and aligning thoughts with action. This podcast is for those who are ready to feel inspired and motivated to live a more purposeful life. Let's grow together. I would say my number one piece of advice for someone who is trying to lose weight is to ditch extremes. Ditch extreme habits, ditch extreme diets, and the all or nothing mentality. You will never be successful if you live in extremes. You will never stay consistent and you will feel like a failure if you aren't 100% all the time. This is the surest way to want to quit your program or your new lifestyle. So I'm going to teach you five ways of how to balance your fitness journey and create an environment that you actually enjoy so you can stay consistent and see results. Let's get started. Hi friends, welcome to the podcast. Um, I'm gonna give you five tips today to create a more balanced lifestyle with food, fitness, and your body image. And I think when you understand these five tips, you'll see why so many people just are not successful with their programs because they can't realistically sustain it. They can't realistically keep up with their goals or with their environment or whatever they have set for themselves because they are doing these extreme habits or diets or have kind of an extreme attitude. So these five tips are gonna help you, okay? If you struggle like losing and gaining the last five to 10 pounds over and over and over again, you can definitely benefit from this, okay? So the number one thing, tip number one, is understanding your personality type because this is going to help you know your thought patterns. So I have done an entire podcast on Enneagram types. If you want to go listen to that and then come back here, you can. But when you understand and know your personality type or your Enneagram number, there's R one through nine. I'm obsessed with it because I actually, this is kind of a fun fact, I actually have my clients take an Enneagram personality test before I train with them so that I know how to train them. I know how to speak to them, I know what their thought patterns are gonna be, what their weaknesses are, what their strengths are gonna be, and I actually coach them to their personality type. Um, it's super unique to what we do, and it has helped our success rates because I understand my clients on a deeper level. So, did you know that your personality type will greatly affect how you approach diet, exercise, your body image, and your habits? So, let me give you a quick example. So, Enneagram types one, three, and eight tend to be more of like a perfectionist attitude and they are a little more extreme. And so those numbers tend to fall into that all or nothing category very easily. Like they're the types that's like, if I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do it 100%. I'm not gonna have facet, I'm not gonna, you know, so they're the ones that like throw away all the sugar in their house, or they like map out all their workouts for the whole month, and they are in the zone when they're in the zone. But when they're not in the zone, it's not like Adam is an eight, and he's either like meal prepping every single meal or he's binging. Like he does not have a middle, he does not have a balance, and it's really hard for him to like have find that balance naturally. It's not impossible, it's just more of your personality tendency. So that's one side of the Enneagram. The other side of the Enneagram is numbers two, four, six, seven, and nine. And these Enneagram types typically are a lot more, have more grace for themselves. Like I'm a seven and I can easily justify, you know, why I needed that ice cream cone at McDonald's. Or I can easily justify why it was okay to eat a bowl of cereal before bed, even though it didn't fit in my macros. It's okay, it's fine. I'll just work out harder tomorrow. Not a big deal. Like they're just naturally easier to um, I don't want to say give excuses, but you know, just kind of justify their behavior. Um, so when I train this type of person, I usually have to give them a little bit of tough love just because they need some accountability. They need the fire, they need the person pushing them and holding their hand. Whereas the other Enneagram types that are um really self-driven, they might need someone to say, hey, it's okay if you, you know, didn't hit your macros exactly. You will be fine. You'll be okay. So you see how I would speak very differently to those personality types. So once you know your personality type, you can understand why you do certain habits and then you can combat it. So for me, I have to keep telling myself, as a seven, it's okay to be uncomfortable, Brie. Like you can be uncomfortable. Yes, this is not enjoyable. Yes, this is not fun sometimes, but it's okay. You can still push through because that's my personality. I just want to have fun, I want to be comfortable, I want to like, you know, I don't like to anyway. So that's the personality types. Okay. If you want more information on Enneagrams, you can always take like the a test online, truity.com, Enneagram test. That one is a good one. That's kind of fun, or you can read books on it, which The Road Back to You is my favorite Enneagram book. It's super simple, goes over each Enneagram type. Once you know yours, I promise you will better understand yourself. Number two, get rid of the all or nothing mentality. You've heard me say this before on Instagram. If you follow me, I say it a lot on my podcast, but it really is like such an important thing to talk about is you cannot be perfect all the time. And something is better than nothing. You don't have to always live in restriction. You don't have to be on because that's where you start obsessing over your food. And that's when you start having a bad relationship with food. If you feel like you can't eat gluten, dairy, sugar, or anything processed, or you're off your diet, well, guess what? You're gonna start having a lot of guilt when you eat an ice cream cone. So that's what I'm trying to teach my clients to get over is hey, you can have an ice cream cone. Like if it fits in your macros, eat it and enjoy it and move on. And even if it didn't fit in your macros and you ate it, okay. There's we don't believe in shame and guilt. Like we move on and we focus on what we can control moving forward and what makes us feel better. And you're coming from a place of positivity instead of shame and guilt, that's way more powerful. So that's why we want to get rid of the all or nothing mentality. So um, I wanted to give an example. Like, I have a friend who is constantly losing the same five to 10 pounds over and over again and gaining it back over and over again because they're always looking for the next extreme thing. Okay, like they want a quick fix. And so they're always looking for like every time I talk to them, it's like, oh, yeah, I'm just eating chicken and broccoli for four weeks. I'm down 20 pounds. And I'm like, okay, but what happens when you stop eating chicken and broccoli? And they always gain it back. So it's that extreme mentality that puts you back into the yo-yo cycle over and over and over again that we're trying to avoid. Okay, so I want you to ask yourself if you can't sustain it for longer than four weeks, you shouldn't be doing it. Okay. Number three, let go of set timelines. Your weight loss will not be linear. You will have setbacks, you will get off track every once in a while. But if you're committed to the process and know that it might take time, you can take a more sustainable approach that you actually enjoy and stay more consistent. So let go of that 30-day, like, I'm gonna lose 10 pounds in 30 days. Let go of that, okay? Even let go of the eight-week, like I have eight-week challenges. That's really just to help you stay focused and be with a group. But it doesn't mean that you're necessarily going to hit your end-all be-all goal at eight weeks. Like, let go of the set timelines. You can't always dictate how long it's gonna take your body. And for the most part, it usually takes a lot longer than you ever expect to gain muscle and burn fat. And when you have the expectation that it's going to take longer than you think, but you're committed to the process, that's where you're successful because you're like, hey, it doesn't matter how long it takes, I'm gonna keep working towards my goal and chipping away at this. And when it happens, it happens. Versus the mentality of, oh, I've been doing this program for three weeks, I still haven't lost a pound, it's not working. You see the difference, right? So one is impatient and wants the quick results, and the other one is committed to the process and they will be successful. So you have to know it's gonna take longer than you think. Number four, learn how to measure your success aside from the scale. And I've talked about this a lot till I'm blue in the face, but you cannot just measure success by the scale. Yes, it is one way to measure success, but it doesn't tell the whole story. So you have to look at your pictures, your measurements. How are you fitting in your clothes, your energy levels, your sleep patterns, your biofeedback? How's your digestion? Um, are you stronger? Are you getting strength gains? Do you feel like you have better habits and patterns in your life? How's your mental health? Do you feel like you have more clarity? Has your brain fog gone away? All of these things are benefits. These are all successes. So you have to learn how to measure that success and acknowledge that success without looking at the scale. Okay, you can look at every once in a while, that's fine. But like I have weighed the same weight for two straight years, but I've lost 6% body fat. So, you know, I look completely different. I've gained way more muscle, I've lost fat, but I literally weigh the same. So if I were going off the scale, I'd look like a failure. If I go off my pictures, I look awesome, right? Like, I'm not saying I look awesome now, I'm pregnant, but I'm just saying after Mila, you know, like you could definitely see a difference in my body, um, even though the weight stayed the same. Um, and the very last tip, number five, is to look at your daily mental wins and how to change your lens. This is the most powerful thing with your fitness and your mentality. Um, I wanted to share a quick story of an example of changing your lens and kind of focusing on those daily wins. So when I went to the gym just a couple weeks ago, I was hurting everywhere. I'm almost I'm almost in my third trimester. I'm a week away from being in my third trimester with my fourth kid, and my body is just falling apart. Not really, but by the fourth, everything's loose, everything hurts. My back was hurting. I was having really bad round ligament pain. And I was getting kind of negative in my head. I was like, oh, why am I even here? Like, I have to keep taking breaks. My trainer brain was like, you're not even really doing anything right now. Like, it's not like you're building muscle right now, you know, like you're lifting light, you have to keep stopping. You burn like a hundred calories for the whole workout. You know, I was just being negative. And then I thought, well, wait, I don't want to feel like this. And so I immediately shifted my lens and I was like, you know what? I'm actually really proud of you for coming to the gym when you felt like crap and you didn't want to, and everything hurt and everything ached. You still came. And even when you came and your round ligament pain was so bad, you kept lifting and you were like putting yourself as a priority. And even if you have to stop, even if you have to take breaks, I'm proud of you for being here. Like you did a good job today. That's a daily mental win, right? You see the difference in energy with how I was speaking to myself before versus after. And then when I left, I actually was in a completely different mood. I was really proud of myself. I was like, you know what? Yeah, I am proud of myself. I didn't have to be here, but I showed up. And that's important. And it changed my whole mentality for the rest of the day. So when you focus on your daily mental wins and try to create this positive environment around losing weight, getting healthy, fixing your relationship with food, your body image, it is such a more enjoyable process, and it's way more powerful. Like imagine if you're, you know, talking to your kid, how do you get them to do something? When you're more positive, they are way more willing to do it. So you have to talk to yourself as you would your daughter. Be encouraging, be loving, be kind to yourself, see the good that you're doing, focus on what you can control. All of these things are gonna help you in the long run. So, to recap, for my five tips, we have number one, understanding your personality type. Number two, get rid of the all or nothing mentality. Number three, let go of set timelines. Number four, learn how to measure your success aside from the scale. And number five, daily mental wins and changing your lens. Hopefully, this helps you to have a little more enjoyable experience with your fitness journey. And if you need help, as always, you can always check out my website if you would like some online training. Um, if you want a coach to help hold you accountable and that kind of knows your background and your story, me and my team are here for you always. So I hope to see you back here soon and I'll talk to you later. Thank you for joining us in today's episode. If you liked the content and want to hear more, remember to hit that subscribe button and write a review. As a small business owner, I appreciate it more than you know. If you are looking for a program to help with self-confidence, to lose weight, get in shape, and work on your mental, physical, and emotional health. Check out my training programs on www.bodyby.com. My team and I help to hold you accountable through the Body Bible app, where you log in to see all your workouts, custom meal plan made specifically for you and your needs, and communication through the messenger. You are never alone when you're on the Body Bible training program. Click the link in the show notes to get more information on how to transform your life from the inside out.