How Sobriety Transforms Health, Confidence, And Careers with Jodi Clark

What actually happens when you stop drinking—and start fully showing up for your life?

In this episode of Self Love & Sweat THE PODCAST, I sit down with Jodi Clark to talk about how a 100-day break from alcohol evolved into a complete lifestyle transformation—impacting health, confidence, emotional resilience, business growth, and relationships.

This conversation goes far beyond sobriety.

We explore what it means to build emotional sobriety: learning how to sit with hard feelings instead of numbing them, rebuilding self-trust through small promises kept, and redefining fun, confidence, and connection without alcohol.

Whether you’re sober, sober curious, reevaluating your relationship with alcohol, or simply looking for more clarity and alignment in your life, this episode offers practical tools and honest perspective.

Inside this episode:
 • why the 100-day alcohol-free challenge became a permanent choice
 • perceived benefits of alcohol vs the reality
 • scripts for navigating parties, social pressure, and drinking culture
 • realistic alternatives for winding down without alcohol
 • emotional sobriety and learning to process difficult emotions
 • building confidence and self-trust through consistency
 • measurable improvements in sleep, focus, productivity, and work performance
 • entrepreneurship, community building, retreats, and coaching in the sober space
 • redefining confidence, fun, and identity without alcohol

We also talk about the impact sobriety can have on leadership, career performance, emotional regulation, and the ability to create a life you no longer feel the need to escape from.

If this episode resonated, share it with someone who may need this conversation right now and leave a review wherever you listen to podcasts.

Connect with Jodi Clark

IG: @soberflourish

Programs: https://soberflourish.com/links

Who is Jodi Clark?

Jodi Clark is a sobriety coach, business mentor, and community leader helping women quit drinking for good and build lives they’re genuinely obsessed with. Through coaching, retreats, meetups, and mentorship, she supports women in creating more confidence, clarity, connection, and freedom...both personally and professionally.

Transcript

Meet Jodi And The Sober Focus

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to Self-Love and Sweat the podcast. The place where you'll get inspired to live your life unapologetically. Embrace your perfect imperfections and do what sets your soul on fire. I'm your host, London Susa. Welcome back to the podcast. Today we have Jody Clark with us today. Jody, how are you? Thanks for being here. I'm great. Thank you. Thanks for having me. I know it's been a long time coming. Jody and I met on Instagram, which is where I meet a lot of really fun people. And we've just been like with our calendars and the fact that you're in the UK and I'm in America, just the time difference, making sure we can make it happen. But I'm so glad that that we we made it happen. So thanks for being here. Me too. Me too. So let's jump right in because um Jodi is the sober business coach. She has a company called Sober Flourish. And that's what we're talking about today. We're talking about the sober life, the way that it impacts our personal and professional experience. I think when you and I first connected, um, I went, yeah, about a whole year without alcohol. Now it's been a little over two. I think I can count on one hand how many drinks I've had, just like sips and a little bit here and there. I know that this is, for lack of better words, kind of trending at the moment, like the mocktails, not drinking, being sober, that kind of thing. And I know from looking at your Instagram page, you have kind of these before and after photos of yourself of just the physical transformation, the emotional transformation, the professional transformation. So let's start there. Like what inspired you to get sober? Why do you think it's trending right now? And let's just, yeah, start there.

The 100-Day Alcohol-Free Challenge That Changed Everything

SPEAKER_00 1:53

So, what inspired me was that I was massively overweight. And I knew that previously the only way that I was able to lose weight was when I took a decent amount of time off of alcohol. So, for example, if I was going on holiday or something like that, I knew that if I could just not drink for two weeks, I could lose a few pounds and feel a bit better, I wasn't as bloated, etc. And I kind of got to a point through COVID and a whole heap of different bits and bobs that had led to me over-indulging on alcohol, um, eating out in an out-of-character kind of way. Um, I got to this point where I was I was really unhappy. And I remember stepping on the scales and thinking, I refuse to get heavier than this. So I had started a bit of a weight loss journey, and then in the summer of 2022, I went on holiday with my family, and I think that maybe there was a a mixture of being in a swimsuit for two weeks and feeling how I was feeling already that I committed to my husband when I when I left that holiday that I was gonna take a hundred-day break from alcohol because I'd previously tried dry January, I'd tried loads of sober Octobers, and I'd never got to the end of it because it unless maybe it wasn't a big enough goal. So I set myself a hundred-day challenge, and in that hundred-day challenge, I managed to listen to the right things at the right time. I had no intention of it ever being something that I needed to address, it was purely because I wanted to lose weight. I had no idea, or I say maybe no idea is probably a little bit strong, but there was no intention for it to become a long-term solution because I had a problematic relationship with it. It was just so I could lose some weight. So in the 100 days, I managed to listen to the right things at the right time. And around the 30-day mark, something really strange happened, and I knew that I was never ever gonna drink again. And that was how mine started. And in listening to other people share their stories, lots of people sharing their stories, I would hear them labeling their drinking behaviours as red flags and things that they would say, like, I knew that my relationship with alcohol had got really bad when I would drink alone at home. Well, I'd been doing that for a long time and never thought anything of it. So listening to other people sharing their stories helped me to stop normalizing my relationship with it and stop normalizing how I had it as such a huge part of my life. And started to realize a little bit more, maybe there's something a little bit more problematic going on.

Alcohol Myths, Red Flags & Rewriting Drinking Culture

SPEAKER_01 4:27

Yeah, yeah. And we'll always justify what we're doing until we choose to change it, right? Of like, oh, I'm just well, it was a hard day, so I need a glass of wine to like take the edge off, or yeah, I'm drinking at home by myself, but like I stayed home, I didn't go out, I made a healthy dinner, had a few drinks. Like, not to say that any of it is, I don't know, right or wrong, but I just know it's so easy to justify our actions. And so the pivotal moment for you after 30 days was you started to hear people's stories and kind of hear yourself through them of like, oh, this is a problem. Is that what really happened after 30 days? Is just noticing everybody else share their red flags and realizing, okay, I'm a red flag too. Or was that I think, but it was from the day one.

SPEAKER_00 5:15

So I knew that because it was going to be 100 days, I had to really go hard. I had to go hard and trying to keep myself on this path that I committed to myself. Um, sorry, I committed to walking down. So I knew that I had to listen to sobriety podcasts, I had to sort of submerge myself in all the quit lit and start to really, I don't know, open open my mind to things that I'd been so closed off from before. So I was listening to podcasts and the way they were talking about the implication on our brain. And I was looking at brain scans, whereas before I'd not been interested in anything like that. Um, so yes, that was be really, I was studying for it. It felt like I was kind of studying for something. Um, and that was really what made me think actually, I know a lot now, and if I kind of go back to how I was drinking before, I almost felt a bit stupid. I felt like a little bit stupid, like I'd learned too much and I couldn't unlearn it. Um that's what what made the difference for me. And at the end of the hundred days, I got a 40th birthday party for one of my really close friends, and that was literally on the 100 and first day. So the 100 day challenge was supposed to finish, and then I got this huge big party with all of my friends in a big country cottage in the countryside in the UK, and I decided that that wasn't gonna happen, so yeah, I just I just decided I was never gonna go back.

SPEAKER_01 6:36

So you didn't have the party or you didn't drink? We went and I didn't drink.

unknown 6:39

Got it.

SPEAKER_00 6:40

Still it's now. I mean, I'm three years alcohol free now. Um, and that now feels like a million years ago, but I remember that it wasn't easy.

How to Navigate Social Events Without Drinking

SPEAKER_01 6:49

Yeah, yeah, and so much comes up because you mentioned like your desire came from wanting to lose weight, right? It came from like physically wanting to look your best, and then you made a commitment. So, how do we stick to commitments? It's not just saying that we're gonna do something and hope it sticks. You have to be curious, you have to be listening to the sobriety podcast or surrounding yourself with people that are affirming the decision that you made so that you can stay strong and you can stay, like you said, full force, full commitment and figuring out that there's other reasons outside of just what you look like for sobriety. It reminds me my first career was in fitness. A lot of people start to work out because of what they look like, but then they realize, oh, it makes me feel amazing. I'm sleeping better, my digestion's better, I'm have less aches and pains. So you go in for one avenue and you realize, oh my gosh, it's impacting so many other areas. And when I think about myself for alcohol, and also I'll share a recent experience because I want to talk about like friends and that new normal, but I just noticed like just how I my my cognitive function, my sleep, right? My ability to like think and process um has just improved so much from less alcohol, less any substances, even less coffee. So for me, it kind of started with alcohol. And then I was like, oh, I wonder what it's like if I don't, you know, experiment with this anymore. And I wonder what it's like if I don't have coffee right when I wake up, first thing to jolt myself into a specific scenario. So alcohol for me really was um a domino effect into other things that I realized I was taking or drinking to try to get to this emotional physical state that quite frankly you can find yourself if you just kind of give it a rest a little bit. And this last weekend I was at my best friend's wedding, her wedding reception, uh, with a lot of friends who I've been friends with for a really long time who love to drink and party and just get rowdy. And so I, it took me a couple weeks, but in my head, I was like, okay, I the version of me I want to show up as is not drinking, is not, you know, sloppy, not like, I don't know, just whatever that version is. I don't want to be that. And so I like mentally rehearsed it. I shared with a few friends already, hey, I'm not engaging in this, this, or this anymore. And it was kind of an experiment for me. I was like, okay, so I went to the wedding, had so much fun, danced with my friends, didn't drink, didn't engage in any other substances, had fun, got a good night's sleep that night, woke up, met everybody for breakfast in the morning, you know, like, and it was still really fun. And I was really proud of myself. And so I just say all of that because, you know, your entry point wasn't because you wanted to get sober for all the extra benefits, but you knew that. And then also the person you now are around the same friends. Did you, did all were all your friends like cool with it? Were they some of them, was it kind of been an ebb and flow of who you still spend time with? Cause that friend topic has been coming up a lot on the podcast, on podcasts I've been guests of too, where it's like, oh yeah, when you're becoming this new version, not everybody's like cool with it. So, what's been the friendship journey since then as well?

Friendships, Boundaries & Handling Peer Pressure Sober

SPEAKER_00 10:14

My friends have never, they've never had a problem with it. They've never had a problem with it at all. Um, I think I'm I'm quite maybe strong-willed that they know that there's never going to be a conversation where all just have one is ever going to make a difference. They were all very, very supportive in the early stages, and your choice is your choice. I mean, at the end of the day, I mean, when I made this choice, I was 39. So we're grown women. We're not we're not in our teens, we're not in early 20s. It's not, I had I made this decision to do this in my early 20s when I was absolutely at the epitome of my party girl era, it would have been a different story. But everybody's just been really grown up about it because it's my journey and it's not theirs. They've never tried to project their journey with alcohol or the relationship with alcohol on me, and I've never tried to project mine onto theirs. I do hear of women um and trying to kind of make other people see the the the the that see alcohol through their lens. It's only ever going to end up in disaster because everybody has a very own complex relationship with it. So my friends have always been really understanding. Um, nobody could really not not one person ever said, Oh, yeah, I can see that you would want to address your relationship with alcohol. I don't think anybody ever looked and thought, oh yeah, she needed to change to change that, but they've been super supportive.

SPEAKER_01 11:28

Got it. Like you do you, they do them. They want to have drinks while you're around. Yeah. And it's it's not that everyone has to now bow down to the way that you are and not drink around you or anything at all anymore. It's just like, okay, this is how I am. So, and I know you coach others on getting sober and sobriety and the personal and professional benefits there. Do they ever share anything with you regarding like friendships or relationships dropping off? Because I know that's common, maybe not for you, but I experienced it and I know any type of change for better health sometimes gets people coming in from the peanut gallery trying to tell you that it's not so bad or you should just have one. How do you coach and help those who are experiencing that from their friends?

SPEAKER_00 12:15

The number one thing that I talk about in relation to loved ones and friends is that this is your journey. This is this is has to be your journey and keep it about yourself. So when whether you've got a social occasion that you're going to making sure that you know what you're gonna say in advance, so you can practice that because I don't care what anybody says. If whatever you say, if you say it with conviction and with confidence, people will leave you the hell alone. It's if you go in and go, Oh, I'm just trying this challenge and I'm not drinking at the minute. And as soon as there's that little crack in the door, people will open that door, barge their way in, and try and get you to do the same thing as them. Because whether they show it or not, they want they want you to be the same. They don't want to feel uncomfortable, they don't want to feel like in a couple of drinks I'm gonna be getting loose and I'm gonna be acting out of character and you're gonna be there to witness all of it completely sober. People like for you to do the same thing. So kind of how I how I generally coach with that is that you you you can't anticipate how somebody else is gonna react, but this is about you and this is in your journey. And if you're going to a party, make sure you've got an exit strategy, make sure you've told somebody that you're going with. Um, it's different for everybody. It is different for everybody.

Replacing the “Wind-Down” Drinking Ritual

SPEAKER_01 13:32

Yeah, I like the planning. Oh, that's also well, and that's like what I did too. It's like you, like you said, if you go in with anything wishy-washy, it's gonna be wishy-washy. But if you have that conviction and that confidence, it's different. So I think of that wedding I was just at last weekend, and towards you know, the end of the night, everyone's getting real, you know, drunk and just having fun, whatever. And so at one point, the bride's sister-in-law, super sweet, or one of her, the one of the, maybe it wasn't the sister-in-law, but just like one of the groom's friends' wives. So we were all like meeting new people and connecting, and she was like, Um, do you want a shot? And was giving me tequila. And I was like, no, no, I'm good. And she's like, no, have one. And I was like, no, I'm good. And then she's like, come on. And I was like, no, I don't drink. And she was like, oh, okay, and just moved on. So it was like, as soon as I drew that line in the sand, even though I could have said, Oh, I don't really drink over the last two years. I've had, you know, a handful of drinks. I'm just not really feeling it. That's too many words. So it's just like, oh no, I don't drink. And then it was like, oh, okay. So I'm not gonna push a person that doesn't drink to have this. I was just, but that preparation and then that declaration in the moment was like easier than I thought. I think I thought it was gonna be much more peer pressure than it actually would. But I think to your point of, I'm gonna be 37. So all of my friends are in their late 30s to early 40s in that group. Like, I think a lot of what I thought was coming was based on like versions of us in high school where like they would have pushed me in that peer pressure. Come on, just do it. So in my mind, I was like, oh, they've grown up too. Like they can still choose, but they're not pushing me to do. So the practice ahead of time and that declaration, nobody's really knowledgeable.

SPEAKER_00 15:22

Nobody cares as much as we think they do. They just don't. We blow it up to be this humongous thing because in that moment, it's the most important thing to us. And if we're really making a big go of it, it's something that's consuming, it can be consuming. Um, and then when you get into that situation, you realize actually nobody gives a shit. Nobody's actually that bothered. And if they are, they're over it within 10 minutes because they're missed. They've moved on, they're getting on with their evening.

SPEAKER_01 15:47

Yeah. Yeah. I think probably, and you know this better than I do because you work with people in that way, but I think what I notice the most about people that drink regularly is it's like that, it's that wind down at the end of the day, and it's the social component. So, like, how do you coach people to like do something else at the end of the day? Or even it could be like the dynamic with a partnership of like you get home at the end of a long day, you have a drink together. So, how do we go from yeah, having those moments where we're winding down with alcohol and then also socializing? How do you, how do we shift? What are the dip tips and tools for for shifting that? Because I mean, I guess some people can just be like, well, I'm just not doing it anymore and we're just not doing it. But I think that those patterns of the wind down at the end of the day and the social interaction.

Healthy Coping Tools for Stress, Anxiety & Daily Life

SPEAKER_00 16:47

Yeah, how do we a number of different perceived benefits for for everybody? There will always be commonalities, like you just said there. So the kind of stress reliever or um like the winding down at the end of the day, it might be socializing, it might be confidence. Um, I always coach around that. That's one of the first parts that we we try to uncover is what are the perceived benefits to you as a human? Why is it on the pedestal to you? And then what we try and do is go through all of that and we unpack that. And is that still true? Is that still relevant, or is that, like you've just said there, attached to an older version of you? Does it give you confidence or did it used to give you confidence? Have you got evidence of actually going out and being confident without alcohol? Because if you have, then that's not true. That's not that that's adding the confidence. It might have made you more confident when you were in your early 20s because that's what made you be able to talk to guys, or that might be what helped you talk to girls. So you've got that sort of brain, you've you've you've actually instilled that inside your neural pathways that you've at tied that association, but it's to an association of an older version of you, just as you mentioned a second ago. So we always look at the perceived benefits for every single client, and there will always be commonalities, but there will always be the little intricacies in there as well. So the idea is we we we go through all of that, and then what we do is we look at what how else have you got available to you that helps you achieve the same thing. Firstly, check if it's true, and if it's not true, it comes off the list. But what we really need to look at is what are the reasons for you that you where's the value in a situation? What what are the benefits for you? And then we try and find alternative coping strategies that are a lot healthier that don't make you feel like shit.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

Yeah, yeah. I feel like that alternative coping strategy is so important. If not, you're trying to like willpower yourself to not do something, and then you're gonna maybe do it again or slip up, and then there's like that shame spiral and whatever. I know that for the end of the day, winding down, just like even being outside, grounding, putting my feet on the grass is so helpful. Meditation, walking meditation, um, even like walking and talking and sending audio messages to friends that are like down for that. Not everybody loves audio messages, but I love that. So I feel like that's yeah, I love them. And I have friends will send like three to seven minute long audio messages to each other multiple times a day and just like catch up when it's time. So that's also been helpful. And even just like a longer shower or a longer bath or just different things that you can kind of plug in that help you feel good and feel alive have been super helpful. But I know it's not as easy as saying, okay, I'm not gonna drink anymore. So instead I'm gonna journal, like whatever that, you know. So I know there's like a bridge to get to that point that you help a lot of people with.

Emotional Sobriety, Healing & Personal Growth

SPEAKER_00 19:43

Yeah, that this is the thing, you you can share tips and you can share guidance, but it it is so varied from person to person. And this is why it has to be unique. And this is why I think that the one-to-one coaching really helps because you're not you're not kind of giving generalized information. Um, yes, you can tell somebody to go and journal, um, but if they're not into journaling, then that is not going to be the best solution because you can have all the will in the world trying to get into journaling, but it's not, it's a habit at the end of the day. You've got you, do you know what I'm saying there? Like if you're not an journaler, it's quite difficult to all of a sudden go, oh, by the way, now you've got to put in this new practice where you don't sit with all of your thoughts, you get them out on paper. Um, so um, yeah, that the there's there's a lot of alternative coping strategies, but I said the most important part is making sure that they're achievable because you might think, Oh, well, I I drink because I'm stressed. Okay, well, what's a really good way that you normally unwind going for a 10k run? Well, that's great, but when you feel stressed out at eight o'clock at night and it's dark and the kids are in bed, that 10k run is no longer achievable. So, what have we got that you can do in that moment? So it's really, really kind of digging a little bit deeper and what is attainable to you at the click of a finger that can help you in that moment. It's like Pandora's Pandora's box. There's there's so much in there.

SPEAKER_01 21:02

Yeah, and you have to get curious too of like, okay, I know that I am leaning towards this, I don't want to lean towards that anymore. What other tools? Maybe I don't think I like journaling, but I'll try it. And maybe I actually do like it, getting curious and leaning into other modalities instead of just being pissed that you're not drinking anymore. And like you said, trying the sober October or the dry January and like pissed off the whole time is like getting curious about other coping strategies.

SPEAKER_00 21:30

Um you have to have to, it's almost like lift you can't just take the alcohol away and depend on the willpower. If you if you've got to really give it a good go and it's going to last, you need to understand that the the nothing's probably gonna be the same. And you need to get comfortable with that. It's just not a nice feeling to know that everything is going to change, but it doesn't change for the worse, it changes for the better. But it's you can't, it's not something that that you can do on willpower. Change having your life exactly the same, and like you say, just taking the alcohol away. You're just pissed off all the time and you're resentful, and you you you don't want to be around other people that can just have one because you can't, and yeah, yeah, you should be bad. It's a it's uh an overall.

SPEAKER_01 22:14

Yeah, and what about what about like the feelings that come up that we're being suppressed by alcohol, that now that you're sober, you get to feel on your own, you get to feel and experience and become more aware of the different feelings that come up and have to figure out, get to figure out how to sit with them instead of push them down with a substance. What's that been like for you and the people that you coach? Well, it's real life, right?

SPEAKER_00 22:39

I mean, people can say, oh God, well, I've got all these emotions and all these feelings. Well, so is everybody else that didn't use alcohol to cope in the first place. This is this is real life, and now we're having to raw dog it like everybody else had to that didn't drink. So this is just real life, and obviously you can kind of work through this and learn to process it, but ultimately it's stopping the distraction. It's having the ability to be able to sit with those feelings and with those emotions and work through them rather than doing what a lot of people do is then lean on sugar, or they will find another, they'll throw themselves potentially into fitness in an unhealthy way. They're trying to constantly distract themselves and numb out, and we naturally were looking for that next dopamine hit. So if it's not alcohol, we'll then channel it into something else. So, in that circumstance, is that yeah, it feels hard, yes, it's uncomfortable, but you have to learn to sit with it and you have to learn to process it because that is where the growth happens. And people talk about emotional sobriety, and that is where the goodness comes, is being able to sit in those moments with your own thoughts. And then once you can do that and you can break those barriers, I personally think you're unstoppable.

Self-Trust, Identity Shifts & Rebuilding Confidence

SPEAKER_01 23:53

Yeah, emotional sobriety. Yeah, I love that. And you said raw dog, and I was listening to a uh uh podcast episode with um with the creator of Facebook. I don't know why his name's Lady Mangreen Zuckerberg, and he was talking with Joe Rogan. He's like, Yeah, I don't do anything, I don't have coffee, I don't drink alcohol, I don't smoke. And he's like, Yeah, my sister says I raw dog reality. So when he said that and I was listening to it, and you said it, I've been using that too. So when people are like, dang, you're not drinking smoke, nothing. And I was like, no, I'm raw dogging reality. And so when I say that, it's kind of like this funny humor moment where people can uh understand, like, oh yeah, like, and and like you said, that emotional sobriety, being able to be present with certain emotions and not numb them away. That was really huge for me. And I would say, even over the last two months, especially, of being able to sit with certain emotions that were really hard to sit with sober, even despite it being, you know, multiple years of it's like that was the hardest part of being able to be anxious for a little bit and experience feelings of anxiety and sit with them and not do anything to try to make them go away. Was it intense and scary and a lot? Yes. And a lot of those emotions didn't last as long as I thought. And so, even like the last few mornings, I've been sleeping really good. I've been having like really interesting dreams that I remember. And like, but then I would wake up and I would somehow find anxiety. And but the last few mornings I've woken up and I'm like, oh no, or oh great, you know, it's not there. And I keep telling myself, I'm finding um, I'm finding reason or finding things to feel calm about instead of finding things to feel anxious about or whatever this you know program was. So I've just been repeating to myself, yeah, I'm looking for things and finding things to feel calm about. And so even it takes time.

SPEAKER_00 26:07

It does, it completely it does. And how much stronger do you feel when you kind of come out the other side of that though? It's often the bits that feel horrendous whilst you're going through them that have the biggest revelations on the other side. If you can sit with your emotions, and a lot of the time, a lot of the people that I work with have had tricky times in the past, etc. It's not always the case. But if you learn to be able to sit with your thoughts and sit with your emotions and start to like yourself and start to show yourself that you can trust yourself again, you start to get a bit of self-belief, that's where the strength comes from.

How to Talk Yourself Through Hard Moments Without Alcohol

SPEAKER_01 26:46

Mm-hmm. Yeah, it's very emotional sobriety, being able to hang with your emotions and be present with them while not trying to push them away or reach for something else to handle it is a very, uh, for lack of better words, like grown-up thing to do of like taking the reins on your emotional operating system for sure.

SPEAKER_00 27:11

I was at a point where before I stopped drinking, and again, I masked this is it was just stopping drinking because I wanted to lose weight, but I quickly realized, I mean, it was one of the biggest self-development things I've ever had to go through in my entire life without realizing it. Um, I wasn't able to kind of look at myself in the mirror. I wasn't able to look at myself properly because I'd become so detached from the version of myself that I rem that I was proud of. Because in when I looked in the mirror, I was so much more overweight. Um and I was angry a lot of the time, and I was very full of anxiety, um, which there's no there's no surprise there. Um but in becoming alcohol free, I was able to then start to build rebuild that relationship with myself, and it started by actually making eye contact with myself in the mirror, and it's it's that building that self-trust again. I didn't like myself before, and when I stopped drinking, I started to really love myself and start to find a connection with myself again, and that was quite difficult to do. Um, but it was one of the most powerful things that I've done. Just being able to look at yourself in the mirror. Yeah, which if people think say anything crazy. Do you say anything to yourself or do you just look at yourself? I don't need to do it now so much because I've rebuilt that. I I yeah, I like who I am now, I like what I stand for, I like, I feel like I've got passion, I've got purpose, I feel like I'm present. Everything that I want to achieve, I'm working towards, and it's becoming my reality because I have that relationship with myself. In those early stages, I think it was a Mel Robbins podcast potentially. And you've got the high five in the mirror kind of but there is something or a task or a challenge that I think I heard on one of her podcasts or or whatever, about looking at yourself in the mirror and saying I love you. And that feeling for me, looking at myself in the mirror and saying I love you was probably the most uncomfortable, cringe, like skin crawling thing ever. And then within the space of maybe a few weeks, I was like, well, that feels a lot more normal. But there was so much, there was so much in the fact that that felt so uncomfortable. It was something I really needed to work through.

Sobriety, Sleep, WHOOP Data & Better Work Performance

SPEAKER_01 29:15

Yeah, yeah, coming face to face with yourself. One thing that really helped me, and I still use it, is making choosing states where I feel very comfortable raw dogging reality, and then making a video of myself to myself in a hard moment. Yeah of things I know that will probably come up again, they aren't as frequent, feeling of anger or anxiety or um resentment towards someone or something. And I'll just make a video to myself and be like, hey, like, you know, it's okay if you're feeling stuck in this emotion. Don't worry, you'll move past it. Remember your Tools, remember to go outside, remember to breathe, remember, you know, just all the things that help me come back to my center, remember those, don't forget those. And so something special about that message from myself feels very believable to my like brain and nervous system of like, oh yeah, that's a version of me. That's me. It's not somebody else, you know, and community is powerful. I love community. I love coaching. There is a power in somebody else believing in you, but there's also a really big power in you believing in you. And so, in that journey of yeah, finding my fully sober self, it was like, yeah, there were certain emotions that I was used to not being sober through or not feeling through fully. And so making these little short one or two minute videos to myself to watch when I'm feeling afraid, when I'm feeling anxious, when I'm feeling angry or whatever has been really helpful. And I watch them and I'm like, okay, yes, I can. It's like I can do this.

SPEAKER_00 30:57

I really admire that because I think it takes a certain type of person or somebody at a certain stage in their journey to interrupt that thought pattern, that sort of um that self-destruct, self-sabotage behavior, to recognise where you're at and think, ah, we've got a tool for that. It takes a certain level of evolvement, I personally think, to check in with that and a certain level of discipline. Because with the with even with the women in my community or one-to-one, it's interesting. And it's the same sort of tale with, I mean, it's behavioural change, right? It can be applied to anything. But when people are trying to get to a certain weight goal and they have like a calorie focus, for example, and their minds, we really need that chocolate cake, we really need to open those crisps, etc., how often do we get in touch with our PT and go, I'm feeling like I'm gonna have a gata? We don't do it, we just don't do it. But the people that do do that, that have the ability to do that, they're the ones that can succeed. Whereas in your situation, you have that um that strength and that discipline to think, ah, we're potentially gonna spiral here, or we're with that negative self-talks there. We've got tools for that. So I really admire you for that because it's not a common thing that somebody would literally go, right? What are the tools? What are the tools that are gonna stop me doing this thing that my brain is saying I'm desperate to do in this moment? I think it's incredible. Yeah, little self-message has really helped for sure.

Career Growth, Relationships & Life After Quitting Alcohol

SPEAKER_01 32:24

Um, one thing I remember, like, I don't know when it was, maybe like five years ago, maybe a little less. I just remember like scrolling through Instagram, and there was this guy that was really encouraging, um, in his case, realtors to be sober. And he would talk about how like when he would get his real estate clients and they were sober, that they would sell on average one to two more houses each year. And I think he said, I mean, I guess it depends where you do real estate, obviously, and whatever, but like his clients were making on average another 250K per year in in sales uh based on simply being sober and more present and aware. And I know that you coach in business and help um, you know, people. I think it's, I don't know if you coach women and men, but I think it's just women. Am I right? Yeah, I think just men. It's just women. Yeah. Okay. So women on showing up in business and flourishing there. I just remember thinking that was really profound, like to have the cognitive capacity and the energy to then go out and potentially sell two more houses, one to two more houses in a year, and what that means for the business, what that means for the person, their family, their life, because of simply having more energy, maybe less moments to snooze, maybe less weekends where you're out for the count. So I want to kind of dive in too of the way that sobriety can help us chase after our goals with even more tenacity, bring in more income, impact more people around us, whether it's our family, our friends, or even ourselves of being able to go on an even nicer vacation or whatever that might mean. It just really opened up my eyes. I was like, oh shit, yeah, there's a lot of time spent, let's say, like in recovery of like a long night or a long weekend, or just being tired or a little bit more brain foggy when we're not sober. And I just thought that was so interesting in terms of how we can flourish even more in business when we take a chance at raw dog in reality.

SPEAKER_00 34:34

Well, completely. I I remember a podcast that I listened to. Um, I've forgotten the lady's name now. She was a guest on um the diary of a CEO, but she, and to be fair, she has her own podcast now, but she was talking about the data that she she worked at Whoop. I think she still works at Whoop now. Um talking about the data that they collect around um alcohol and how quickly, how long it takes to get out of the system. And it was seven days. It was up to seven days from I don't know how much alcohol she was talking about, but it wasn't like a bender, it wasn't like a full-on session. Um, but it took takes seven days to fully get out of your system. And that if that's not for a full-on drinking session, it it's it's not rocket science, is it, to work out how better we could be showing up in our life if we were to be able to remove that. For me, from a personal perspective, when I stopped drinking, I lost six stone in weight. So I don't know what that converts to in the US, but six stone in weight, um, I think it's like 86 pounds, something like that.

SPEAKER_01 35:34

Yeah, I was gonna say one stone is a lot more than one pound for sure.

Sober Flourish Coaching, Retreats & Women’s Community

SPEAKER_00 35:37

While you're talking, I'm gonna look it up, but it's 14 pounds per stone, so times that by six. Um, so I lost six stone. I managed to get the confidence and the self-belief to finally push for a promotion that I knew I was worthy of and that I deserved, and that um hadn't had the confidence to talk about before. So I felt confident and comfortable to do that. The flip side of that is I was showing up to work every Monday morning to our weekly trade meeting with the directors, super hungover because I would drink a bottle of wine every Sunday night because I was so nervous about the meeting I'd got on Monday. Instead of not drinking, I would drink and then I'd show up hungover and I'd be anxious and it or I would make it worse. So I had that that consistency, that mental clarity to back myself, to hold myself professionally. I was already at a senior level. So the conversations I needed to have were even more, more um, what's the word I'm looking for? Um, I needed to be, I needed to be um professional. I needed to be on point, yeah. Yes, exactly. So I was able to do that. My my marriage improved. My marriage didn't, I never thought that I needed to improve my marriage, but my relationship with my husband that I was scared was going to be hindered by me not drinking improved massively. I ended up leaving my corporate role in January this year to go full-time into my retreat hosting, my community leading, my one-to-one coaching, and launch my business coaching for alcohol-free coaches as well. None of this would have happened if I was still drinking, not a chance. And on paper, I wasn't sat on a park bench with vodka in a brown paper bag. I was a grey area drinking woman that from the outside, everything looked completely fine. Everything looked completely fine. Um, I was heavily, heavily drinking at a weekend, without a doubt, but it wasn't all day. I had kids, everything was fine. Removing it has not it had there isn't an area of my life it hasn't positively impacted. Now, we're moving on to the clients that I work with. I've worked with women that do drink and I have worked with men, uh sorry, women that that don't drink. And that's not to say that women that do drink aren't professional and aren't massively successful. Of course they are. It would be ridiculous to ever assume that that wasn't the case. But when I've worked with women in this in on the similar, similar starting point with similar goals, the ones that don't drink get there a lot quicker. There's no hangovers. They have the self-belief, they have the confidence, they don't have the extra, extra anxiety layered on. They're not holding themselves back, they're not losing a day with a hangover, they're not moving meetings out, they're showing up for others, they're showing up for themselves, and it shows they might they might feel um more inclined to be consistent with their self-care, etc. So they're showing up differently. I see a I see a lot more um it's hard, it's it's hard to say without pissing anybody off, but this is personal experience. I see women progress more when they don't drink.

Redefining Fun, Confidence & Social Life Without Alcohol

SPEAKER_01 38:37

Yeah. I mean, it is what it is. Like you said, you're it's not that you're not gonna be successful, but how far can you or how much further can you get when you're when you're sober, when you're the mental clarity, like you said, just the ability to just show up faster, be more cognitively sharp on point. Yeah, yeah, is is clear, is very clear. And yeah, it's okay if people are upset. That's okay. We we don't, we're not trying to please everybody. Here, we're just talking about our experiences and things that we yeah, that we feel are important. And so you do retreats, you work with people one-on-one, you have group coaching. What are the offerings that you have for women that are looking to do they have to already be sober? Like what are the criteria to step into your world?

SPEAKER_00 39:22

So for one-to-one coaching, that's for women that predominantly want to become alcohol-free, or they've been alcohol-free for a while and they kind of feel like they might be going back to it a little bit, or they've just removed the alcohol and they've realized that actually shit, there's a whole lot of work I need to do here. Um so that's the one-to-one coaching side of things. But I also run something um called, well, it's the business is sober flourish. Um, but I have a community of hundreds of women, which is a um, it's it is exactly that. It's a it's a community of like-minded, non-judgmental women that are in the grey area, they're kind of the forgotten middle. Um, so you've either got a super, super, super horrendous relationship with alcohol, and that's where people would generally um think that people needed to address their relationship, or you've got a normal relationship with it. Everything in the middle, completely forgotten. So, all of those women, they they generally um they're hydroachieving, they are professional women that are at that point where they just know that it's not serving them anymore. Um, obviously that scale varies. It can be one drink they want to stop, it can be something a lot, a lot more, a lot, a lot more regular. Um, so that that is weekly calls, um, all of the resources, everything that I listened to, everything I needed in early sobriety that got me to become alcohol-free and has made me sustain that for three years. There's all sorts in there. I've got the um subconscious reprogramming tracks to get into the kind of subconscious mind to start rewiring those beliefs because ultimately that's where it all starts, right? Um, there's all sorts in there. So I have the community over there, I have the one-to-one coaching, but I also run retreats in the UK, um, which I'm planning my next one for September, which is in the most beautiful location in Wales, um, in the UK. And then I have my business coaching for alcohol-free coaches. So when I was doing my um qualification to become a coach, something that I witnessed very regularly was that people had become alcohol-free, they'd found a passion, a purpose to help other people. They had a huge transformation, a story that they wanted to share and help other people create their own as well. But there was a huge common issue was that nobody knew how to turn this into anything. They didn't know how to show up online, they didn't know how to create a business. Now, in my corporate world, previously, that had what is what I'd always done. I've always been in the digital space for the last literally since Facebook began. A long, long, long time. Um, so what I, and that was focusing predominantly on helping small businesses with their online presence, brand consistency, user experience, websites, or anything you name it. So, what I thought would be a great way to kind of bring this all in is that I work predominantly with alcohol-free coaches, helping them to bring their coaching businesses to life. Because I'm a firm believer that you generally don't have to sell coaching to somebody, they generally know that they're looking for it, but they're trying to find their person. So, what I'm able to do is help their person find their voice and their platform online so that they've got a full choice. Because whilst ever these incredible women can't bring their businesses to life, that their people aren't going to find them. So now I work with women, and we have the Flourish Collective, which is a mastermind program. Um, and then I do have some one-to-one coaching clients as well for business coaching. It's just all very gorgeous, and it's all happened since January. I say the business coaching side of things happened since January. So, but Flourish is nearly two and a half.

SPEAKER_01 42:42

Sounds yeah, and it's so many options or opportunities for people to get connected, no matter kind of where they're at on their journey. And as you were talking, I was thinking about like different friends, um, people I know, maybe even versions of myself that feel like if I'm sober, then I'm not as fun, or I'm not as courageous, or I am better in social situations. I just feel like called to say about anyone who's thinking that of like there's nothing more to use your word gorgeous than showing up authentically in exactly as you are, your sober as-is version, even if it feels scary or uncomfortable, or you feel a little bit more confident or a little bit more sexy or flirty or capable, it's fake. It's a false formula for actually showing who you truly are. And so when you were talking, I was just like, there's somebody listening that feels that way, that feels like, oh man, no one's gonna like me if they truly see me for who I am, if they truly see me, you know, sober, not drinking, not partying, if I'm not the fun girl, if I'm not the one who's doing all the things that I do when I'm drinking or whatever. That's okay. Be that person, step into that role, step into that feeling of feeling uncomfortable and doing it anyway, because that authentic expression of who you are behind all the numbing, behind the masks, behind the bottle, whatever, is so much more beautiful and so much more alive and so much more valuable to the world, to others than you could ever imagine. So keep going.

Where to Find Jodi Clark + Final Thoughts

SPEAKER_00 44:27

Yeah, I'm with you. Completely with you. The cut the confidence that comes from true sobriety, there's no comparison to the confidence you think that you're getting from alcohol. No way. I mean, I used to think that I needed to drink. I used to say to my friends, I'm not dancing, I've not had enough to drink. Now I will dance without drinking. I never thought that that would be the case. It was all of those stories, exactly that you've just said there, all those stories that our mind is telling us, is the your mind's way of keeping you under protection, keeping you safe, keeping you exactly where you are, because it can predict the outcome. If you stay as you are and make no changes and you listen to the excuse your brain is giving you, it will keep you exactly where you are. You've got to start to interrupt that thought pattern and start gathering experience that you can be confident, you can be sexy, you can be a great friend, you can be sociable, etc. And gather that evidence and show your brain that you're the one that's the boss. You get to write this next chapter. You don't have to stay where you are. Amen.

SPEAKER_01 45:25

For real. I just, yeah, I feel I felt that a lot when I, when you were talking, I was just like, oh, there's there were for sure moments where I was like, oh my gosh, I can't be as creative as this without this. And it's just like such fucking bullshit. Um, so grateful to have you here today, Jody. Um, I'll link all your social media and website and stuff in the description of the podcast. But if you want to quickly share where people can find you and connect with you while they're listening, um, please do. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 45:54

So you can catch me on Instagram either on my business page, which is at SoberFlourish, or my personal brand and my business coaching is at Buy JodiClark, or my website is soberflourish.com.

SPEAKER_01 46:07

Thanks for the work that you're doing, helping women shine even brighter. We really appreciate you. I'm so grateful for this conversation today. Thank you for having me. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Self-Love and Sweat the Podcast. If you enjoyed this episode or were inspired by it, or something resonated with you, do me a favor and share this episode with a friend, someone that you think might enjoy this episode as well. That's the ultimate compliment and the best way to make this podcast ripple out into the world of others. And also, you can leave us a review up to five stars wherever you're listening to the podcast. Thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you at the next episode. I appreciate you.