Heal Yourself Podcast
A podcast diving into all aspects of healing; from nurturing your relationship with yourself, to functional medicine insights, to transforming your money story, we're here to empower you with the knowledge and tools to create lasting change.
Heal Yourself Podcast
Episode 54: From Hardships to Healing and Success With Brigette Sobis
Discover the remarkable journey of Brigette Sobis, a dynamic coach and consultant, who has traversed the tumultuous path from a master certified hair colorist to a thriving business owner and coach. Hear her inspiring story of resilience, as she navigated personal and financial hardships, including a challenging divorce, breast cancer, and bankruptcy. Brigette reveals how she transformed adversity into opportunity, selling her award-winning salon to focus on personal growth and coaching, emphasizing the power of resilience, letting go of ego, and embracing change.
Explore the fascinating world of the unconscious mind with us, as we discuss the transformative power of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) and timeline therapy. Brigette sheds light on how these techniques can help release negative emotions, transform self-beliefs, and address trauma, including PTSD. Learn the significant role the unconscious mind plays in our decision-making and behaviors, and how aligning conscious and unconscious thoughts can lead to overcoming self-sabotage and enhancing personal growth.
About Brigette:
Brigette Sobus is a dynamic Coach and Consultant dedicated to empowering individuals to build thriving businesses and lead fulfilling lives. With a background in business transformation, she's known for revitalizing struggling ventures and guiding them to remarkable success. Brigette's expertise lies in coaching individuals to step into leadership roles with confidence, fostering power, joy, and prosperity. As a seasoned practitioner and Trainer, she holds certifications as a Master NLP Coach, Master Practitioner of Time Line Therapy, and Master Hypnosis Practitioner. Brigette's commitment to personal and professional growth led her to expand her toolkit, attaining certification in Advanced Coaching for Trauma, PTSD, and Addiction. She also incorporates Somatic Coaching and Reiki into her practice, further enhancing her ability to facilitate holistic transformation and healing. Connect with Brigette at brigette@brigettesobus.com to embark on your journey to success and fulfillment.
Find Brigette:
Ihttps://www.instagram.com/coachbrigettesobus/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/brigettesobus/
Free Gift:
https://brigettesobus.ck.page/biggest-blocks
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Welcome to the Heal Yourself Podcast, where we dive deep into all things healing. I'm Denise, a speech-language pathologist and a self-love coach for adults and teens.
Speaker 2:And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and functional nutritionist, and we are here to guide you through the transformative process of healing your body, mind and soul.
Speaker 1:From the latest in functional medicine to nurturing your relationship with yourself, healing trauma and even transforming your money story. We're here to empower you with the knowledge and tools to create lasting change.
Speaker 2:So, whether you're looking to heal physically, emotionally or spiritually, join us as we explore the many paths to wholeness and wellness. Hello everyone, welcome back to another episode of Heal Yourself Podcast. I'm Kira, and today I am joined by special guest Bridget Sobis. I'm going to introduce her and then welcome her on. So Bridget is a dynamic coach and consultant dedicated to empowering individuals to build thriving businesses and lead fulfilling lives. With a background in business transformation, she's known for revitalizing struggling ventures and guiding them to remarkable success. Bridget's expertise lies in coaching individuals to step into leadership roles with confidence, fostering power, joy and prosperity, and as a seasoned practitioner and trainer. She holds certifications as a master NLP coach, master practitioner of timeline therapy and master hypnosis practitioner. So I'm excited to talk about all these modalities. So, Bridget, welcome. I'm so to talk about all these modalities. So, bridget, welcome, I'm so glad to be here with you today. Yeah, I always start with the same question at this point Tell us how you got into this, like, give us a little bit of your background.
Speaker 3:Yeah. So how I got into this was how I even became an entrepreneur was my first and foremost. I was a master certified hair colorist Love it, yeah. And I was working in a pretty dysfunctional salon making a six figure income, and I'd worked for many different kinds of businesses at that point and I thought, if this person can own a salon, there's no reason why I can't. And then the opportunity presented itself. I bought the salon. I became the hot mess because I didn't know how to run a salon, and then the opportunity presented itself. I bought the salon. I became the hot mess because I didn't know how to run a salon and I lost my six-figure paycheck and, gratefully, I was like crying all the time.
Speaker 3:I was so highly emotional and someone introduced me to my first coaching consultant, which that was back in 2005. And coaching wasn't even really a popular thing back then. And I remember invest. I had zero money in the bank and I had. I hired this company. It was like $1,800, like a month for coaching consulting back in 2005. And it was one of the best investments I ever made. I started turning the business around by 30, 40% and I thought I want to do this with other people. I want to help people like this. So that started my journey to become a trainer and then, in 2012, I took a year-long certification to join the International Coaching Federation. So that was my first coaching certificate. And then, yeah, I started doing coaching and consulting for years. And then what really led me to do the work I do now?
Speaker 3:I have sold my salon during the pandemic, and that's part of my journey, because in the middle it was award-winning business, it was profitable, and I found myself going through a really nasty divorce in 2010, which led me into $1.3 million of personal debt, which is a real effect.
Speaker 3:Sometimes I have to look back at the numbers and I'm like what my ex-husband unfortunately, you just don't know what, you don't know Right, like I was running the salons, he was running properties that we owned and he had a drug addiction, all the things, and that's where the $1.3 million of debt came from, and I took it on personally to get legally away from him. And then from there, I found myself going through breast cancer for the first time, which everyone's free and clear of, and then I ended up filing bankruptcy to get out from it, because I had a lot of attorneys say if you don't file bankruptcy, you're really going to be financially ruined and I was like, but I could lose my business, this is profitable, this is hard earned and I decided to buy it back. I decided to buy it back and then that that was like another, really traumatic year, like I coined 2019 dark night of the soul year, yeah Right.
Speaker 3:So like I was like trying to buy my business back, I was in massive survival mode. I was working like crazy amount of time. I was working like crazy amount of time and finally, when I felt like I really hit rock bottom, I was like I cannot do this anymore, like I can't live like this. So I decided and actually I was like you know what, sometimes the universe has a way of kicking you in the booty and being like you're ready for something different.
Speaker 3:You know, I almost had it for 15 years. So I decided to put my ego aside and then, like, I sold it. And then I was. I was like what's next for me? And I had always had the like I, at the heights of my career, like, even being a coach, I would be producing 1.3 or 1.4 million in sales between the salon and my coaching.
Speaker 3:You know business and but there was always this part of me that, like, my mind was always on negative thought. I couldn't get my mind to stop thinking negative thoughts. I couldn't. My emotions would take control of me. Like if I was telling you about my divorce, like I don't know six years ago, you'd see me get like all angry and like mad again. Like I would be reliving the emotions over and over and over again. I had I was a people pleaser. I felt a lot of guilt and shame, and then so I sold the salon, put the ego aside and I started going into therapy and getting a coach again. And then I had always heard about NLP and I didn't know what it really was. I just had a mentor that would say and I'm a master of NLP and you're like that's right.
Speaker 3:I don't know what that means, but you're amazing and I was always looking up to her and I was always like I want to be like Kathy. When I, when I grow up, and I found a course that was that trained NLP, and they also said you're going to learn timeline therapy and hypnosis. So back then, like four years ago, I was like hypnosis, that sounds really weird. I'm like in timeline therapy. I have no idea what that is, but I just trusted my instinct and I took the course and I was halfway through the program and I was like am I not upset at that anymore?
Speaker 2:Am.
Speaker 3:I not mad? Do I not believe this anymore? I had. I had so much peace of mind that I've never experienced before. Actually, after I left the certification course, my therapist quote unquote fired me. She didn't fire me, but she was like, cause I kept coming to the sessions now being like, uh, I don't know, there's nothing really to talk about. And then, like the other coach I had been working with, I ended that relationship because he would be like, so that person that is always triggering you, let's talk about that. And I'm like, no, I'm good, I'm good, I'm not triggered stopped off that hamster wheel. Because I used to say sometimes I wish I could get everyone's free and clear of this. But, like I would say sometimes I wish I could get a lobotomy so that I can actually disconnect from these negative thoughts and like negative emotions and.
Speaker 3:I had no idea the power of working with the unconscious mind, yeah. So I then did a deep dive. I mean, I had the biggest quantum leap I ever had in my life. I literally took that certification, got my master's, got board certified, and then I launched Power and Joy Coaching Academy, which that was. I haven't had my three-year anniversary in October, so that's a little snippet of the story.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, and I feel like the aha for many is going to come from. Oh my gosh, that's me. I get in the negative spiral, the victim mentality, the emotional mess where I don't know how to get myself out of this, and goodness knows, that's what leads to health issues. I mean, we talk about all the time on the podcast these things come up people pleasing perfectionism, all those fun things. I think most of our listeners know what hypnosis is, just because of me, and I know what the other two are, but I would love for you to expand upon them. What's NLP? How can it help someone? And then same thing with timeline therapy.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so NLP. I mean NLP is a lot of different modalities, but ultimately it's studying excellence and it's actually modeling excellence. And it also it's all about language and how you're using language not only in communication skills and how you're being more in control of your state versus your state being in control of you. So it's very like, it's very. It's a lot of unconscious work and subconscious work too, and timeline therapy is it's. I would say it's a hybrid of NLP and hypnosis work. It works, it's, it could be, it could be very fast technique that helps people release angers, fear, hurt, guilt, at the unconscious level. And it's.
Speaker 3:They're pretty like, once I get my clients going on it like I can do the do the technique within like I don't know, sometimes five to 15 minutes, and then I'll be like so, like I'll do the do the technique within like I don't know, sometimes five to 15 minutes, and then I'll be like so, like I'll be like before they go in. I'm like so, have you, um, have you ever thought, can you think about an event in the past where you used to be able to feel anger? And they'll be like oh yeah, I've got a few of those and I'm like yeah, exactly Like oh my God, I can go back 10 years ago. And then, after I take them through the process, I'm like all right, so how do you feel about that anger now? And they're like hmm, yeah, I mean I knew it was there but like I don't feel it at
Speaker 3:all anymore. It's wild, yeah, it's wild, so that's a really. And then it also supports with releasing negative decisions like I'm unworthy, I'm unlovable, I don't deserve it, I'm fear of, you know, fear of success and things like that. And then I do also, I've even like, since that, you know, since three, you know three, four years ago, I've added certifications in trauma and PSTD. So then I even take those techniques even deeper and do like trauma releases, support people on releasing anything that's getting in their way with PTSD. And then one more thing I'd like to share about with even NLP, with cause, like it's so like when you're with language is so powerful. I was actually even like talking to my 12 year old nephew last night about it, about how to like have his own language, cause you know I was teaching him. I'm like, okay, so you've, you've heard of the unconscious mind and he has. And I said the unconscious mind doesn't process a direct negative. So if I say to you, do not think about a purple pig.
Speaker 2:I was like did you think about any?
Speaker 3:of those and he's like, yeah, I'm like okay, so consider, when you're thinking about all the things you don't want to happen, you're still attracting that. So it's shifting to focus on what you want instead. And it sounds so easy and it's so fascinating to me when I'm talking to people how they talk so much and like I don't want this, I don't want that, I won't, don't want, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 2:And then it's like really retraining them to be so consciously aware how they're talking to themselves and out loud, and I'm same with my clients on a physical healing journey. Um, and we talk about subconscious unconscious. Will you explain that a little bit for those that are like oh, I don't understand what the unconscious is, how do you know what the unconscious is even doing? Because it's unconscious.
Speaker 3:Hilarious, I know right. Well, here's the thing. We have an unconscious. Well, I mean you can go into different layers. There's the conscious subconscious. I mean, you know, you can go into different layers, like there's the conscious, subconscious, unconscious, and then there's a higher consciousness, like in a spirituality which I believe, and so ultimately, your unconscious mind runs at about 95 to 97% of decision making behaviors and people are just even unaware of it, like most people are just on autopilot, and a lot of times what's happening is people are constantly self-sabotaging themselves because the unconscious mind is where, like the emotion, it's the domain of the emotions and it's the domain of the unfortunately positive belief systems and then negative ones, and then, when the negative ones are really deep and the negative ones and the positive ones were most likely formed during the ages of like zero to seven, seven and possibly in the womb, because people's unconscious minds are like little critical, uncritical, little sponges gathering up the good, bad and the ugly around them. And even if they have, like the most amazing parents that are working on doing everything, well, I'll just say quote, unquote, right, they can have a run in with some stranger on the street and it could be a negative situation and that could have formed some negative belief system. So I mean, even if we go back to like primitive days, like how the primitive mind works, the unconscious mind is designed to protect you, even though it's weirdly not sabotaging you. Yeah, yeah. So when you have, when your conscious and your unconscious are incongruent with each other, that's where, again, a lot of the self-sabotaging comes in.
Speaker 3:I love to use the analogy of like an elephant. Like, if you think about an elephant, that's your unconscious, and then, if you're sitting on top of your elephant, your conscious mind. And if you're, if you're sitting on your elephant, you're like I'm going to go start a business and make a half a million dollars. And elephant is like oh hell, no, you're not. What if you fail? What if people judge you? What if you lose all your money?
Speaker 3:Like we can go on a you know, like a but and then your elephant kicks you off. So what I love to do is I love to work with people to retrain the elephant. So the elephant is like I know, I'm like releasing all that stuff that no longer serves people. So now the elephant's like someone's, like I'm going to go start a business and make a half a million. The elephant's like yeah, we are, we deserve this, we have all the knowledge to do this, we can, we're flexible, we can learn and grow and you know all the things.
Speaker 2:So then now you have your conscious and unconscious congruent with each other and they're actually going in the same direction now, yeah, which is so important, and I feel like that's where a lot of self-sabotage comes in around health too, yes, people dealing with chronic health issues. So how does the unconscious, subconscious, mind, impact our physical healing?
Speaker 3:the unconscious, subconscious mind, impact our physical healing. Oh my God, I mean I, I first informed, I mean I a hundred percent know, I can speak from experience on this one because you know, I, I didn't have and everyone's pretty clear this I'm very mindful of installing, um, I've, I personally had breast cancer not once, twice, oh my goodness. And my personal belief system is, and I, you know, I follow people like Deepak Chopra and Louise Hay and I am not I just want to say I'm not a doctor, so I always tell people to, you know, do their own research. And it's just was really I feel like from two traumatic events, one, first one being my divorce and then the second one filing bankruptcy and trying to buy my own business back from dark night of the soul year. So it was even just weird how file divorce two and like it was almost like two and a half years later, like I was like I was training for a marathon the first time I got it and I was feeling really great. And I was like I came, I got called back from a mammogram and I was like, are you kidding me? Like I'm training for a marathon, how could I possibly have this? And then did again, did all my healing work, all the things. And then you know, now it's 2019, dark night of the soul year. I come out of that, sell my business, reinvent my life, have these quantum leaps, and I'm like, I'm like, oh my gosh, I love my life, I love my business, I'm so excited. I literally walk into 2022, which is two and a half years later, got a re-diagnosis and I was like, are you kidding me? It was just, it's just weird how the timing was, and like I and but I will tell you this, though, because of the work that I do now, I did have the most emotionally healthy year I ever had in 2022.
Speaker 3:While navigating through surgery, radiation, chemotherapy, I actually and I just I just launched Power and Joy Coaching Academy. So it was like I was like left to my own devices, generating revenue and income and sales, and I still had over a six-figure year and I worked 50% less at the time. So I just I'm, just I'm a huge, and that's this is another reason why I decided to get my certifications in trauma and PSTD, so I could support people on releasing that stuff. Because I just I'm I'm a firm believer of the mind, body and soul connection and unfortunately, unfortunately. This is why I'm like everyone start working on your mental health now. You know, the more you work on your mental health now, that's going to just, that's going to serve you in your body and your cellular system down the line. You know, I don't, I don't think people need to wait to have some, like, dark night of the soul or traumatic experience to work on their mental health. Like, please, by all means, like, do it before.
Speaker 2:Yeah, mental health, like, please, by all means, like, do it before. Yeah, you're preaching to the choir over here Because, yeah, I mean, I tell people symptoms don't just come on, they don't just happen, the body doesn't decide. One day, you know what I think I'm not going to function properly. We're doing something and it a lot of times starts in the mind, with our emotions, with something traumatic, and, yes, it creates a ripple effect. I'm mind with our emotions, with something traumatic and, yes, it creates a ripple effect. I'm not saying, hey, just clean up those emotions and everything's going to go away. No, then you have to take care of what deficiencies have come about. How has this impacted my gut? Am I absorbing things? And you know, there's a nice little ripple effect that happens. But yeah, we can't wait. I tell people, by the time symptoms come on, I'm not going to say too late, right, it's never too late, yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:But you're past that point of like oh shoot, now I have to try to backtrack and we can't. And a lot of times we ignore those initial symptoms, right? They present as little whispers of like oh gosh, I'm getting a headache three times a month, but it's fine, it's not that big of a deal. And then they get louder, and louder, and louder and then they're screaming at you and it's like oh crap. Well, yeah, I had all these events happen and I don't know how to slow down and I have no boundaries. Was I supposed to do something with that? Yeah, every day we working on that every day.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so it's I, I'm, so, I'm an advocate like and it's. You know, I love statistics, so I'm always like reading statistics and like looking them up and you know, it's like you know, on the entrepreneur level, like how many entrepreneurs it's 81 percent of entrepreneurs suffer silently. Like they're not, they're not, they're they're. And I did it myself. Like I was the queen of looking amazing. Everyone thought I like had it all together and like was always on vacation or always doing something, and like I was literally, yeah, I would have fun don't get me wrong but like I would literally like I would my anxiety. Well, I need to. I keep reframing myself. Somebody actually pointed it out to me. They're like it's the, it's not my. Yeah, yeah, so I just I keep reframing myself. Somebody actually pointed it out to me. They're like it's the, it's not my, and I'm like yeah, so I just I keep catching myself. So I do this work in real time. Yes, we should be. I live by it, right? So that was just a. That was just me catching myself right there.
Speaker 3:So delete the, my the. The anxiety used to be like on a scale of one to 100. It was like 150. That's how. And it was weird because I literally had to retrain my nervous system, yeah, how to let it go and get out of that, like you know, flight, fight, flight or fight mode, fight or fight mode. So it was like I think, like reflecting back then, like I was literally and a lot of people are like this and they don't realize it addicted to the negative emotion, yeah. And then when I was like off of it, I was like, oh, this is weird. Yeah, how do I wait, how do I feel this is so weird?
Speaker 2:Like I had to get used to the the, the feeling of feeling like, oh, light and relaxed, you know, and people get addicted to the stress, which sounds really funny. When I've talked about this, that was me like not knowing how to slow down, because it's like as soon as I did, it's like, well, what do I do Now? I'm getting tired, like if I stayed busy, my energy stayed up, and I mean, hello, cortisol issues, but women especially, but entrepreneurs too, like that's a whole beast on its own.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean we can you know? I mean, again, you know people that are not entrepreneurs. They have, you know, they have their own stress and all the things and what you, if you're a stay at home mom or you're working in corporate or you know, whatever you're doing in life, it's just, unfortunately, I love, like I love.
Speaker 3:Do you listen to Joe Dispenza? You do, yeah, so I was, I like I was like binging his books over the summer, all three of them, like three of them that he has and he, you know, he really talks about like how you know, back in the caveman days, that flight or fight mode served us, you know, and then, as we evolved over humans, it hasn't necessarily gone away and people are addicted to the stress and the fear and like the survival mode and all there is to do. Really, I mean it sounds easier said than done and I think it can be super easy, but commit to, you know, working with your unconscious mind, reprogramming your mind, releasing cellularly, mentally, physically, emotionally, those limiting decisions and those negative emotions that no longer serve you, because I believe that those negative emotions can get harbored in your cellular system.
Speaker 2:They do, creating issues in the tissues. So loaded question. I ask these pretty much on every episode too. But how does someone get started with retraining, like, is there something they can do in this moment to start retraining?
Speaker 3:I like to go to like the easiest thing that I like to say. Even when I'm, you know, doing my own intro trainings with people is like even starting breath'm. You know, doing my own intro trainings with people is like even starting breath work. You know, doing that somatic breath work. There's two. My go-tos are doing alternate nostril breathing. Where you're breathing in, you know you close one nostril. You deep, deep breath in, close the you know close that side. Breathe out, breathe in, then keep alternating for at least 90 seconds. I actually had a client of mine I did add a client of mine that she was getting ready to do a presentation and she was like texting me and saying oh my gosh, I'm really worried and stressed out and I was like all right, pull, pull your car over.
Speaker 3:And she did. And I told her I had told her to do that exact practice. And she messaged me after the presentation was over. She goes oh my gosh, I can't even believe how centered and grounded I felt. So I would say and then my other go-to is like let's just say you're even in real time with someone and you know, and you're feeling like you're even in real time with someone and you know, and you're feeling like you're noticing yourself being triggered. Um, I would do the box breathing because I mean, I think, like doing that, like all of a sudden you're breaking out your people are like what are you doing?
Speaker 3:what are you doing so for? To be like, uh, you know, like less conspicuous, like you can just do box breathing, which is, and then that's like breathing in, slowly, breathing in for the count of four, holding for the count of four, releasing for the count of four, holding for the count of four, and then um, and then uh, yeah, do that at least four times. Just you know, you could probably easily Like, but now I'm really noticing what you're doing yes, and pausing. There's so much power in the pause, so when you practice pausing, you're going to actually start retraining your brain to do those automatics.
Speaker 3:You know the automatic crying, the automatic. Wanting to yell, the automatic. If that's you know someone's go-to, uh, the automatic. You know, my automatics used to be like I'd either start crying, I'd scream at you or I would like run away. I gotta go so love breathwork.
Speaker 2:We've definitely talked about that. Um, had some breathwork experts come in and it's. It's such a simple one, and that's the thing, and that's what I'm always telling people is we overcomplicate things. I'd rather go to the simple things. Yeah, pause, because when you're doing simple hacks of breathwork, you're being present and then you can start to reflect.
Speaker 2:If you immediately go into reaction, you can't reflect and you can't be like well, how am I emotionally feeling right now and how am I processing this and do I need to move my attention? And that's not going to happen unless you ground yourself and get present in that moment.
Speaker 3:I'm actually in the process of getting my breathwork certification, so it's possible by the time you're listening to this, I could already have it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, nice.
Speaker 3:So it is pretty powerful. I love all these different like somatic modalities, like, if you add, like even I love doing meditation work with my clients, like somatic meditation and visualization work. They're so powerful, visualization work, they're so powerful. And it was so funny because when I took my first coaching certification, there was a weekend where it was spirituality weekend and we did meditation. Back then I was like all I kept thinking to myself was when is this going to be over? When is this going to be over? So if you are listening to this and you are like, oh, I have a really hard time meditating, know that I was there at one point and now I'm obsessed with it and I love it and I do it every. It's a practice I do every single day and every single night Same.
Speaker 2:It used to be a big challenge for me. I mean hypnosis, meditation, breathwork, any of it was a challenge. And now it's like I crave it.
Speaker 3:I can't wait to do it, yeah, yeah. And I think people have the misconception. I mean, yes, you can get to a point, I believe, when you could possibly clear your mind and literally think of nothing. But I think people have that misconception that like they try to do hypnosis and they they're like I can't get my mind to stop. That's totally normal, it's totally okay and it's a practice. Yeah, and it's a practice and a process. So all you got to do is just, it's just. I say it's just like if you, if your mind wanders, you just got to bring it back and that's it. That's why I do love to start with people is doing the more visualization meditations, because then they do go into trance, they go deep inside themselves and they're like getting connected to their inner self and then getting learnings while they're in that meditation and going through like the visual, the visual processes.
Speaker 2:Awesome. Well, if people want to find you, where do they go?
Speaker 3:I'll probably say the easiest way would be on LinkedIn or Facebook. Awesome, LinkedIn or Facebook. You know I have a professional and personal, but personal is always welcome.
Speaker 3:Cause I you know, talk professional on there. I don't really. No, I mean, yes, sometimes I'll show my dog. She's super cute, but those are probably the two easiest ways I would probably say and then my all my resources and if you want to text me, my phone number's there. Email you know, I'm pretty easy to get a hold of. I believe I think all those spammers out there oh goodness, yeah, the spammers can get a hold of me. I think anyone can.
Speaker 2:Yeah, right, right. Well, I will have everything in the show notes, so you guys check that, as always. Thanks for listening. Thanks for being a guest, bridget, so nice having you on. Yeah, yeah, and you guys, we will see you on the next episode, but first, if there's any topics you want to hear about, please leave us a message on Instagram, leave us a review and share with a friend who needs this information.