Episode 72: You Can’t Live The Same Day And Expect A New Life

Ever feel like life runs on repeat while your goals sit in the waiting room? We dig into the “Groundhog Day” loop—those rushed mornings, reflexive phone checks, and stress patterns that masquerade as productivity—and show how small, intentional shifts can change your day and your direction. Denise, a speech language pathologist and self-love coach, and Kira, a traditional naturopath and functional nutritionist, share practical tools that regulate the nervous system, make space for real fun, and transform beliefs into action.

Instead of defaulting to cortisol-fueled hustle, we outline micro habits that create momentum: prepping the night before, two minutes of breath before screens, short walks that reset your brain, and tiny creative outlets that lift mood. We talk about language hygiene—how answering I’m good can gently retrain your state—and using your top complaints as a to-do list for change. You’ll hear why affirmations only work when your calendar backs them up, plus simple ways to design your environment so the easiest choice is the one your future self would make.

If you’re ready to trade loops for progress, press play, pick one 1% shift, and tell us what you’re trying. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a review with your best title ideas for our upcoming audio mini-course. Your next day can be different—start now.

Transcript

Welcome And Healing Focus

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Welcome to the Heal Yourself Podcast, where we dive deep into all things healing. I'm Denise, a speech language pathologist and a self-love coach for adults and teens.

SPEAKER_02 0:15

And I'm Kira, a traditional naturopath and functional nutritionist, and we're here to guide you through the transformative process of healing your body, mind, and soul.

SPEAKER_00 0:25

From the latest in functional medicine to nurturing your relationship with yourself, healing trauma, and even transforming your money story. We're here to empower you with the knowledge and tools to create lasting change.

The Groundhog Day Pattern

SPEAKER_02 0:39

So whether you're looking to heal physically, emotionally, or spiritually, join us as we explore the many paths to wholeness and wellness. Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Heal Yourself Podcast. Today, Denise and I are talking about Groundhog Day. Not the actual day. I have nothing to say about that. Or the movie, I guess. Right? Or the movie. I think I mean this comes from a few different places, but honestly, sometimes just watching people in this world, I'm like, everybody is living groundhog day. Like you're waking up to the same exact thing every single day. You wake up, you have the same thoughts, the same beliefs, you do the exact same things, but then at the end of the day, you're like, well, damn, why hasn't my life changed?

SPEAKER_00 1:37

Well, right. And I'm gonna challenge that because I know somebody listening will be like, wait a minute, but uh, what about my routine? You know what I mean? Like, what about like you're telling me that I need to change my routine?

Routines Versus Serving Habits

SPEAKER_02 1:52

I mean, I think there's a distinction there, right? So do I have a routine? Yes, but let me throw in an example then. Let's say you wake up in the morning and it's absolute chaos. You're like rushing around, trying to get ready, um, making kids lunches for school, like doing all sorts of stuff, and you race into the car and you're headed to work and you've barely eaten breakfast. Okay, that's your current routine. Do you like that routine? If you like that routine and it's serving you, by all means, keep doing it. I am doubtful that that's serving you. Something needs to change. Maybe it's thoughts and beliefs, but it might be actions for this, right? Like, can you make the lunches the day before? Can you get up earlier and have something that's a little more calming? Some meditation, some breath work, take a walk. Like, don't check your email for like there's so many different things. But people don't want to see that because that takes work. So, does that make sense? So, like, it's not the routine. Like, I drive the same way every single day to take my kid to school and in the military. No, they told us not to do that, but like, yes, some things are routine.

SPEAKER_00 3:00

What do you mean? They told you not to do that.

SPEAKER_02 3:02

You're always supposed to change up the way you're going, the way you're walking, the way you're driving in case someone's following you. Literally, learn that in the military. Do I follow it? No.

SPEAKER_00 3:11

In case someone's following you.

SPEAKER_02 3:12

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 3:15

You're being stalked.

SPEAKER_02 3:16

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 3:17

Oh, wow. Okay. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 3:20

So I don't I don't think routines are bad if the routines are serving you. But I mean, you and I talk to women every day, not even working with them, but just out in the world of like people who seem frantic, people who seem unhappy, people who don't like their relationships with money, with uh friends, partners, whatever. You can't do the same thing every day and expect the same results. That's insanity. I mean, we're calling it groundhog day, but it's insanity.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

Or someone saying that I don't have time, I don't have time, but then you look at their screen time.

SPEAKER_02 3:54

Find the time.

SPEAKER_00 3:56

You haven't the time is right there. Yeah. And I was gonna throw something out there, but I totally forgot what it is. Oh my goodness. No, no, no. Oh, oh, oh, when I posted the story about the fun. Oh, yeah. Yeah, and we are so hesitant to add in, because maybe also we have a different perspective of fun. Yeah. Like, for example, you know, like coloring and painting for me is fun. But it doesn't have to be maybe some people interpret fun like, oh, I have to be dancing and loud and jumping up and down and traveling or on vacation on a cruise to have fun. But you can be on a walk and having fun, right? So it doesn't have to be, I think it's also our our perspective of what fun is, and that's why some people get caught up. Like, how am I gonna add fun in my daily routine or my daily in my on the daily in my day? Uh you know what I mean?

Redefining Fun And Daily Joy

SPEAKER_02 4:57

Well, and I think I mean, I think fun is one aspect, but I think it just it goes back to awareness. What in your life are you trying to change? If you need to have more fun, yes, you can find ways to do it, however, it works for you. Um I think my thing with Groundhog Day too is that it's funny, I made a post. I made a post on social media today, and it was a brief one. It just said cortisol is more addictive than nicotine. And I have my own thoughts on nicotine, but not.

SPEAKER_00 5:27

No, no, absolutely, absolutely. We're and we're addicted to those emotions that that we get from that too.

Cortisol, Familiarity, And Discomfort

SPEAKER_02 5:33

And I I had a couple people that are like, wait, what? And like, sure, there's research out there, but also just what I've seen over the years in myself and others clinically, and we know that familiar is more comfortable than change, even if familiar is painful, right? Even if familiar sucks, even if familiar is like the worst thing ever, it's what you know, right? So if your body is familiar with I have this routine, I have these thoughts, I have these beliefs, you're not gonna want to change. And that's where the whole the body's more addicted to cortisol than nicotine. You have to get uncomfortable to make some of those changes, right? Like you were talking about fun. I mean, we've talked about this before, and I'm gonna tie it in. I had some free time today because a client canceled, and it's like, could I do emails? Could I do this? I can always find work to do. But I was like, you know what? I have not taken a walk in a while. The weather is finely nice. That is that is my fun. That is something that I need, and it is wildly uncomfortable. As funny as it is to say taking comfortable, it is. And if I'm trying to change things in my life and change the state of my nervous system and be more calm and relaxed and present, that is what I need more than sitting in my computer and doing more emails.

SPEAKER_00 6:57

Correct. And that's literally how I was gonna I was saying the same, I was gonna say, are we editing this? No, not anyway. I'm gonna say the same thing about yesterday because again, we can sit at the computer for hours without you noticing. Because guess what? The emails are not gonna stop and the notes and all that. So it's like, oh, I could do some notes and I I could do this, and I was like, wait a minute, I already sent the emails, I already told myself that I'm gonna do the notes tomorrow. So why am I not just stopping? So I basically stopped myself and then started on that painting. I actually posted the story today because I'm loving it. I get them from Five Below and they're so fun, like either the one by numbers or just the random, like this one had like flowers and butterflies and things, and it just wanted to paint it because painting is so soothing for me. So I was like, no, stop. Like, you know, you already said to yourself that you're gonna send the notes tomorrow. And I think I think it's also the intentions because you can, you know, one thing can drag into another, and you're like, wait a minute, I sent this email. Oh my goodness, I remember that I haven't emailed this one, and then I'm gonna do this, and then and then you jump from one thing to another to another, and this is where we lose ourselves back into you know, the whole groundhog day thinking the same thing and thinking, like if I send this other email, something's going to change, something's gonna go about it. Whereas no, sometimes like pausing and then you just teach it. But at the end of the day, too, we are all addicted to all that cortisol thing because of the hustle culture of the go, go, go. So, when is this gonna end? It's only gonna end when you stop it, when you take the pause, when you remind your body that it is safe, it does not need the all that. So I think it's just also a lot of intentions because it's all the things we've been talking about on the podcast, right?

SPEAKER_02 8:54

Awareness, and you can't make those changes without awareness. So awareness and then looking at what am I trying to change in my life or what am I trying to call in, attract whatever, whatever it is, improve upon. Well, then you have to make those shifts, and those shifts are gonna be uncomfortable, right?

SPEAKER_00 9:12

Like waking up in the morning, actions of those shifts are gonna be yeah, yeah. The actions are gonna be uncomfortable because you're not used to it. And that's literally what I I mean. I've posted about it on you know, on Instagram so many times, and I talk about it a lot. It's just like how I it's the same thing as with like training for something, or like with me, for example, if I'm trying to change somebody's um, you know, we're working on sounds or we're working on perspective taking or flexibility or whatever, everything that I'm teaching them at the beginning is uncomfortable because they don't know how to do it. They're used to the other way, but then it's just the repetition and repeating. But then a lot of us sometimes give up before the actual shift happens because it's like, wait a minute, but I I did it, I've been doing it for two days. Why isn't it happening?

Choosing Restorative Actions Over Hustle

SPEAKER_02 10:00

Or they don't like the discomfort, right? Like, I can't tell you how many people I've talked to in the morning, and I'm like, okay, don't check your phone first thing. Like, don't roll over in your bed and start checking Facebook, checking emails, like, hello, that is one of the worst things you can do for your health. I'm like, instead do X, Y, Z. Again, there's a million things. Journal, pray, meditate, do some breathing. But people don't want to do it. They're like, but, but, but I'm like, because you're in that routine, you're stuck in groundhog day, and it is wildly uncomfortable to say, huh, I'm not gonna check my phone. I'm gonna do this instead. So that's what we mean by you gotta get a little bit uncomfortable, even if that means just like you said, I think it was last week or one of the weeks, the 1%. You don't need to change 5,000 things. Pick one thing. If one thing we said with you resonates today and you're like, oh crap, my morning routine sucks. Great, do that one thing. Or if you're like, no, I don't know how to slow down, then commit to taking a walk, then commit to painting, like do something that's uncomfortable for you.

Micro Shifts And The 1 Percent Rule

SPEAKER_00 11:06

Yeah, and then understand that it is not gonna happen overnight. You and I not checking our phones first thing in the morning did not happen overnight. No, and there's still days, guys. Yeah, we put in the hours, we put in the the the behind the work scene. Um, I am gonna throw in the dance example because the Super Bowl of dance is happening as we speak. It's um it's a big competition for all college um dance teams. It's like they literally call it the Super Bowl of dance. And they posted a video, I think Ohio State, because they were, I think they're the champions, they posted a video about how the work that they put behind the scenes, the the training, the getting up before the sun rises, the conditioning that they put in just for that two-minute on stage that to everybody looks so easy, but to them, they put in the work. So if you can go on and just see that, I sent it to my daughter yesterday, whoever's listening right now, it's uh the I think the Ohio uh state dance team put it on their Instagram, and it is so beautiful because we judge, like even sometimes whatever it is, whether it's in the relationship or in a business or in whatever, we're like, oh, look at them. They can, oh my goodness, this is life is so beautiful for them, or oh, she's a good dancer, or he's a good this, or he's whatever, or they have a lot of money, or they're traveling a lot, but you don't know what took. And these people or whoever, like you and me as well, we put in the work. You're not seeing the tears, you're not seeing the like, what the heck is wrong with me, you know, or the the failures and stuff like that. You're seeing the byproduct, whereas we are putting in the work, so it is time to get uncomfortable. And I've been posting a lot of TikTok videos about if you keep thinking about something, if you've been thinking about it for a year, it's time to stop thinking and start doing. So, this is where you know, you just stop with that groundhog day and make each day a little bit different, it doesn't have to be dramatically different, it's just that 1% or 1.5, 2%.

SPEAKER_02 13:25

Yeah, and that's the thing. I think we have a society of unhappy people. Like you talked about fun, and I won't even dive into that specifically, but just again, looking around, like you've got people with road rage, you got people that look grumpy, and don't get me wrong, there's great people I come into contact with, right? But in general, there's a lot of unhappiness. I mean, even talking with a lot of my clients, we talk about purpose, and they're like, I don't know. I'm like, oh my gosh, like we we all have so much we can be working on. I do not believe we are here to live an unfulfilling life. So if you could do anything, be anything without any limitation, right? If I just said, hey, Denise and I have this magic wand, what do you want to do? Who do you want to be? Denise is waving her wand. There you go. Like, start taking the steps to that. If you're like, I'm in a toxic relationship, I hate my job, I hate my boss, um, I my house is a train wreck, you know, whatever. There's a million scenarios.

SPEAKER_00 14:32

My health is crap. Yes, I feel horrible. I can't even walk, I can't even go up the stairs. Yep. So everything I eat gives me a reaction. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 14:40

Uh-huh. Start looking at not just your actions, look at your beliefs and look at your thoughts. You have to make changes.

Purpose, Agency, And Identity

SPEAKER_00 14:48

Yeah. Yes, absolutely. I just thought of something, Kira, and maybe that's kind of like because we're always telling people to uh what you know be aware of the thoughts. I get it. Why, instead of um the thoughts, why don't you also pay attention to what you're complaining about? Because we tend to complain about the same thing. Yep. Right. And what we're complaining about is something that we need to change. So take a mental note or an actual literal note or something, and then better yet, if you don't want to, if you don't want to point the finger yet, start watching and listening to the complaints of people. And then look at yourself like, wait a minute, I complain about that too. Hmm. Okay, how can I 1% change it? Yeah. So for example, like, I don't know if you notice, but when you text when you text people or when you're talking to someone on the phone and you're like, how are you? And they're like, I'm okay. Why aren't why don't you be intentional about that and say, I'm good, even if shit isn't good. Like you know what I mean? Like, even if you're tired and you have a ton of things to do, try to start there. Because I used to notice myself every time someone asks me, How are you? I'm tired, I'm exhausted, I have so much to do. Instead of saying, now it's like I'm good. Because you know, guess what? You are because you woke up. And there's plenty of people out there who didn't. You know what I mean? So it's time to okay. I'm going to maybe ruffle some feathers. But like we are addicted to victimhood.

SPEAKER_02 16:37

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:38

And it is time to just stop.

SPEAKER_02 16:43

I mean, I can chime into that. I I hear people I I can't my I hate my job, but I can't do anything because I'm not making much money and there's no jobs out there. Really? There's no jobs out there. Are you sure? Is the news telling you that? Or do you know for a fact? So what if you've been applying for jobs for a year? Keep keep going, but also change that internal dialogue. That's part of the problem, is people don't change that internal dialogue. They just keep telling themselves over and over and over, there's nothing out there for me. All the jobs are limited. Oh, everything sucks. There's that victim mentality.

SPEAKER_00 17:19

Or they get too attached to the positive thinking, but they don't do anything about it. Because there could they can be that there's someone's listening, well, you know what? I'm do doing the positive thinking, I'm doing the affirmations, but are you? Yeah, how many times are you doing that?

SPEAKER_02 17:37

And have you actual beliefs, or are you just saying them?

SPEAKER_00 17:41

And are you carrying the action that ties into this affirmation? Right. So, for example, one of my affirmations, I always say I'm divinely guided and protected, right? So, but if I'm walking and driving or whatever, then I'm constantly like, oh shit, I'm worried about this. Oh, am I not gonna be able to do that? That's not being divinely guided and protected. That's wanting to be in control. So it's another thing that positive affirmations, I mean, news flash for you. Yes, we love them, but positive affirmations are not just gonna work if you keep them in here in your mind or on your journal. You gotta take that uncomfortable action that is tied into this affirmation. You know, when you say all is well, but you're going around trying to control everything, guess what? You it's not all is well. You're just saying it out loud.

SPEAKER_02 18:37

Yeah.

Complaints, Language, And Victimhood

SPEAKER_00 18:38

Right. And when we say action, speak louder than words.

SPEAKER_02 18:42

100%.

SPEAKER_00 18:43

So try to commit to that 1% of action, whatever it is, to change anything that you are complaining about. Because sometimes people say, Well, I don't know, my life is okay, it's good, I'm happy, I'm satisfied, I'm satisfied. But what are you complaining about? Because we all complain about something.

SPEAKER_02 19:03

We do, and that's where the changes come in, and that's where the micro shifts come in, whether it's the actions, the thoughts, whatever. So I mean, stop living the same day over and over and over. And start living the life And then call it fake. Yeah, and start living the life you were intended to live. I mean, I'm not saying that everyone out here is supposed to, you know, be a billionaire eating bonbons by the beach. I don't think that that's what we're here for. But you can have a purpose-filled, joyful life, a hundred percent. And I'm not saying that traumatic things and life won't happen, because it does, it's gonna happen to everyone at different levels, and we're all here to learn and grow, but you are still able to have a wonderful life. And if you're not having it, then it's time to look at everything we just said.

SPEAKER_00 19:57

Yeah, and get out of that, you know. I am gonna say it. I mean, I know if you if you get triggered, then great.

SPEAKER_02 20:04

Yeah. Triggers are lessons.

SPEAKER_00 20:05

Triggers are lessons. And if you're, you know, just get out of that victim mentality and stop pointing the fingers outward. Yeah. Go back in. Because, like you said, Kira, we're meant for way more than that. And I'm not talking more as of like materials. Yep, agree. You know what I mean? Like we are, we were not, we didn't come to this lifetime or to this earth to stay status quo and keep repeating the mis our parents' mistakes, our the intergenerational stuff. You came in to become the better version of yourself. And if you're looking in the mirror, just look in the mirror, no matter what it is, no matter how what the situation is. Oh, yeah, guess what? We are all surrounded by people who are whatever. But look inside here. Because when you change inside here, the people around you will change. I'm not saying that they actually physically change. They may, they may disappear or leave your life, like you know, or whatever, be like, oh, I don't want to hang out with her anymore, or whatever. You know what I'm trying to say? Things will definitely change once you make the shift of truly, truly accepting also you, pointing at yourself. It's your groundhog day that you want to change, not that person, that person, that person. Because we see a lot of people and us included, pointing, like, oh my goodness, I didn't get this job, or I didn't get this because they're grumpy. They were grumpy at the interview, or they were looking for something else. You know what I'm trying to say? We tend to point the finger. So let's get out of that.

SPEAKER_02 21:39

Turn the finger around and point it at you. We're the ones that have to make the changes.

Aligning Affirmations With Action

SPEAKER_00 21:45

Yeah. No one is gonna, no one's gonna give you permission other than you. No one, literally nobody. I mean, we're giving you the permission. But ultimately, it is on you to give yourself permission to. I'm not wearing my glasses, so if I'm squinting, you're fine. If I remember to post this on YouTube, if I'm squinting, it's because I didn't because I wanted to look the and by the way, if you're watching us on YouTube or you, Kira, I'm having a moment with this with this jacket, so I've been wearing it often. And it is my daughter's jacket from competition. Seriously, it's also the things that you wear and how you dress that could make you feel like, oh, every time I wear something, my daughter's like, You're are you trying to become scandalous?

SPEAKER_02 22:27

I'm like, Yes, yes, I am.

SPEAKER_00 22:29

That's my goal. I don't know what she means by that. But like, you know what I mean? Like it could be as simple as I just remembered from this jacket, it could be as simple as changing the way that you dress.

SPEAKER_02 22:41

Yeah, you don't feel comfortable in your skin, change something, change your hair, go get different makeup, change your clothes. Like, there are so many scenarios.

SPEAKER_00 22:51

I don't know, whatever, whatever makes you comfortable. Getting a blowout does like I don't care about it, but you know what I mean? Like it's just something like it could be that one percent. Like someone listening might be like, oh, if I get my nails done, I'll feel different. And I'm like, great, go get it. Yeah, done. You know, if I wear a faux leather jacket, I feel scandalous. Alrighty, I think we're ending the uh the end of the episode. If I mean I'm gonna have you say something, but my thing for you today, if there's something, one thing that you've been thinking about for more than six months, thinking of doing, and you haven't done it yet, today, not tomorrow, stop thinking about it and do it. Because action comes, sorry, clarity comes from action. You move and the world moves with you.

SPEAKER_02 23:52

And I'm I mean, the only thing I'm gonna add is look at who you want to be. Like, who do you want to be in this world? Are you being that person? If not, there's your groundhog day to look at and start making the shifts towards who you want to be. And that's it.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

Absolutely. And then Kira and I have a surprise for you. I think it's coming up like very soon.

SPEAKER_02 24:16

It is. We are working on the case.

SPEAKER_01 24:18

So you have to name the course. That's all right, guys. We have an audio course coming.

SPEAKER_00 24:23

Maybe, maybe they can help us about like naming it if you can throw in ideas, but it's such a mini course that you can listen to it in the car, audio course, and that will it's not gonna change your life dramatically. However, it's gonna get you. It's that one percent.

SPEAKER_01 24:40

It's those small shifts. Oh, maybe we should call it the one percent. I like it.

SPEAKER_00 24:45

Okay, we're making progress here, guys. We're making progress here. But it's very it's coming very, very soon. We've recorded everything. It, you know, like we do have some little things, but you'll definitely hear about it. And we would love to hear from you, right? Of leave us the reviews, what you want us to cover next. I think we do have some guest episodes coming up. We do, and we're so excited. We I mean, I don't know. I like I've my life has really, really changed since we started recording this, truly.

Self-Image, Style, And State Shifts

SPEAKER_02 25:17

I know. I I just want to say thank you to you guys because we started this, it's been over a year. We're almost at 3,000 downloads, which in the scheme of things is like, oh, that's it. No, we're pretty proud of that number because we just started this podcast on a whim and said, I don't know, let's see where it takes us. And we have not missed a Thursday.

SPEAKER_00 25:37

No, not at all. We have not, and I really want to say something, I want to add something, I know, and then we'll end with the breath and the affirmation. But the other day, my daughter got in the car and was saying something like they were arguing, I guess them, you know how teenagers are. And then uh a few of her uh fri her friends said, I think some of them also know me, but some of them also follow me on Instagram, and they're like, We need uh Avery's mom right now to help us with the meditation. And then one of her friends looked at her, she's like, Yes, your mom has that energy. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, because I didn't, I didn't have that energy. I was frantic and crazy and like running around wanting to control everything, but I've worked so hard on this, and when she said that, I was like, She's like, you know, they're joking, and I'm like, it doesn't matter whether they're joking or not, but they're picking up on that young energy, and it's really, really, really, really thanks to this podcast. Really, truly, truly, because the research that we've done, everything that we've done for the episodes, and when we say something to you, we actually go and commit to ourselves and do it. So, is that your squirrel back?

SPEAKER_02 26:52

Yes, there's something living in my walls, you guys.

SPEAKER_00 26:57

My body's dying.

SPEAKER_02 26:58

We're gonna end on that note as I go back to the back.

SPEAKER_00 27:00

Yes, we are going to end on this note. So let's take a few deep breaths. Four in. I'm gonna take one, two, three, four, pause for four, two, one, and exhale for four. Three, two, two, one. While we're saying I am exactly where I need it to be. I am exactly where I need it to be. Again, inhale for four, three, two, one, hold for four, three, two, one, and exhale for four. Three, two, three.