Amazing Yoga, Mindfulness and Widow-Hood | Liz Bernardi Seaden | Ep 07

🧘🏼 Meet Liz Bernardi Seaden: From Tragedy to Transformation Through Mindfulness and Movement

In this deeply moving episode of The Carol Beringer Method: Amazing Movement, host Carol Beringer sits down with dear friend Liz Bernardi Seaden, whose journey from England back to Pennsylvania after the sudden loss of her husband exemplifies the power of resilience and reinvention. Liz shares her path from grief to becoming a yoga teacher, mindfulness educator, and founder of Widows Rising - a supportive community for women navigating loss.

Join Carol and Liz as they explore how movement and mindfulness became the foundation for rebuilding life after tragedy. From teaching emotional resilience to children in Philadelphia schools to creating supportive networks for widows, Liz demonstrates how personal healing can transform into service to others. Their conversation touches on the challenges of single parenting, cultural adjustment, and the importance of seeking support while maintaining hope for the future.

This heartfelt conversation offers valuable insights into turning pain into purpose, the healing power of yoga and mindfulness, and how we all possess the inner strength needed to navigate life's most difficult chapters.

About Liz Bernardi Seaden: 
Liz is a certified yoga instructor and Director of Teacher Development at Mindfulness Through Movement, teaching yoga and mindfulness in Philadelphia area schools. After losing her husband suddenly in England, she moved back to Pennsylvania with her son and rebuilt her life through movement and mindfulness practices. She co-founded Widows Rising, a supportive community for women navigating widowhood, and continues to help others find resilience through her teaching and advocacy work.

Widows Rising: Follow on Instagram @widowsrising
Mindfulness Through Movement: Teaching emotional resilience in schools

CHAPTERS:
00:00 Introduction to Amazing Movement Podcast
00:45 Meeting in Yoga Teacher Training 11 Years Ago
01:46 Overcoming Anxiety About Sharing Personal Stories
04:26 Living in England for 22 Years
05:32 Sudden Loss: Husband's Death at 45
06:18 Moving Back to Pennsylvania with Her Son
08:39 Cultural Adjustment Challenges for Her Son
10:41 Learning to Ask for Support During Crisis
12:03 From Yoga Practice to Teaching Certification
14:12 Teaching Mindfulness in Philadelphia Schools
17:09 Director of Teacher Development Role
19:31 Building Social-Emotional Skills in Students
21:04 The Genesis of Widows Rising
24:31 Growing the Widows Rising Community
26:49 Creating Safe Spaces for Grief and Growth
28:27 Navigating Loss During the Pandemic
31:27 Accessing Inner Resilience and Strength
33:09 Personal Wellness Practices and Weight Training
36:18 Planning Your "Third Chapter" of Life
38:31 Learning Spanish and Lifelong Education
39:51 Travel Goals: States vs. Continents
41:28 Living Resilience as a Daily Practice
43:56 Rudy the Leonberger: Moving a Giant Dog from England

ABOUT CAROL BERINGER:
With 25+ years of experience, Carol combines expertise in brain-based functional movement, Pilates, and yoga to help clients achieve improved posture, pain relief, and lifelong wellness. Her mission is to help people live as well as they can for as long as they can, building a community of women embracing wellness and joy as a lifestyle.

CONNECT WITH CAROL:
Website: https://carolberinger.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pilatesandmore110/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CarolBeringerMethod
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-amazing-movement-podcast/id1801483560
For guest contact information: hello@carolberinger.com

Subscribe for weekly episodes to continue your journey toward wellness and resilience!

Transcript

00:00 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Welcome to my weekly podcast. I'm building a community embracing wellness and joy as a lifestyle. Join me as I explore diverse self-care practices to live as well as we can for as long as we can. Let's embark on this vibrant journey together. Hi, and welcome to a new episode of Amazing Movement, the Carol Berenger Method. And this is my dear friend, liz Seaton, who I met 11 years ago in a yoga training, because anytime I do anything movement, if I'm going to do it, I need to get certified in it and add it to my tool bag. And I met Liz and I was just drawn to her immediately and so yeah, feelings mutual oh great and it was a really great experience. 

00:45
It was a great experience and I was having actually I was having trouble with revealing myself because they had this thing called Town Hall. 

00:54 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Oh, hometown, hometown, Remember that? Yeah, that was. 

00:57 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yes, it was part of the training where you had to speak. There were 20 people, I think, in the training, something like that. 

01:02 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
And you had to tell. For 10 minutes you had to speak about yourself, yeah, and I was beyond panic stricken. 

01:10 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Well, I, you went early to get it over with. 

01:12 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I went the first time. Yeah, because I just thought I cannot have this hanging over my head. I, when I heard we had to do that, I was sort of so nervous about it. And so I thought, right, I'm going to do it the first weekend, just to get it out of the way, so I wouldn't have that anxiety about it. And so I spoke so quickly and told my kind of life story in three minutes, and then they said, okay, you still have seven minutes to go, and they made us fill up that time. 

01:46 - Carol Beringer (Host)
But you did tell me that because I was so panic-stricken about it and I don't really get anxiety or panic but I just did not want to do it. 

01:56 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
It's hard to just talk about yourself. 

01:58 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Well, because they wanted you to reveal personal things and you said I didn't reveal half of my personal stuff. So I'm going to make you reveal it today. Okay, now I'm not going to make you do anything, but we're just going to have a great catching up. 

02:12 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I'm comfortable revealing things, but I have to. I don't presume people want to know everything about me. So, as if it's pertinent to a conversation, I'm quite happy to reveal things, but I'm not somebody that will just bring something up, you know, unless there's a reason for it, right? 

02:33 - Carol Beringer (Host)
So yeah, but all along the lines of resiliency. So when I do these podcasting sessions I usually plan for interviews, and so I called Liz, who and I do know her sister and she'll be on another segment and then Liz and Sarah both introduced me to another woman who has become a very dear friend and we are all on that segment for a bit and she's separate, but it's been a really fun day. 

03:00 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, but all of us had very challenging mornings really fun day, yeah, but all of us had very challenging mornings, so I'll let you talk about yours. Oh, just rushing around, nothing serious, but just I thought I would have a lot more time and just a series of events. Yeah, and you thought you would take a breath before you arrived here. 

03:19 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yes, to do something that's not something you do every day either. Yes, this is my first podcast To do something. 

03:22 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
that's not something you do every day either. This is my first podcast, is it? I've never done this before. Wow, look at us. 

03:26 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yay, so I know my first one. That morning I didn't do anything, I took a hot bath. I just, you know, was peaceful, and this morning it was. I went to the dentist thinking it'd be an hour. 

03:39 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I know I can't believe you did a dentist on the same day. I don't mind a dentist, that's good. I have a dental phobia, oh. 

03:44 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I do not, I never. I well, I had a really mean dentist as a child when they didn't used to even. You know, in my neighborhood you know we couldn't afford Novocaine or any of the other extras. And the dentist did not like little children, so I learned to self-hyp. Go over to the window. So I tell about that in another segment. 

04:06 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But yeah, that's how I always had nice dentists too. 

04:08 - Carol Beringer (Host)
There's no reason for my yeah it's completely in my head. 

04:11 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But it's funny that you say that self hypnotized, because I definitely over the years I do, you know, I meditate before I go and I find, if I just don't look at any of the instrumentation, I think that's, it's just something. 

04:26 - Carol Beringer (Host)
the tools Looks like something out of Braveheart. We've, yeah, we've. We've been through a lot of each other's things over the years, and when I met Liz, Liz had just moved back from England. And what tell us your story about that? 

04:40 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Right. So I had been living in England for 22 years, I had studied there at university, I did a Temple University program abroad and I met an Englishman, as you do but we ended up getting married and I moved to England and I loved it. I loved England and we lived in London and then, on the outskirts of London, we had our son and then, in 2008, my husband died from a cardiac event, basically a heart attack, it turned out it was something called viral myocarditis. So, very unexpected, he was 45. I was 41. And so it was a huge shock. 

05:32 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And your only son. Wasn't it his birthday or something weird like that? 

05:35 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
It was the day before my son's 11th birthday. So you know it was tragic, it was shocking Stayed in England for two and a half years after Tom passed away and then moved back to this area in 2011. Yeah, and I moved back to this area. When I say back, I grew up here from when I was 12 years old, through college, and my parents lived in the area. My sister lived in the area, so I just thought it was really good to come back. You needed your people. Yeah, I needed my people. 

06:18
There were a tragic few years. My late husband, both of his parents, passed away few years. My late husband both of his parents, passed away my mother-in-law a couple years before he passed away and then my father-in-law a couple years after. So we didn't really have any family in England, although we had a great network of friends. But my son was coming up to a point in his schooling where a lot of the kids in England were going off to boarding school, to a point in his schooling where a lot of the kids in England were going off to boarding school. So that support group was all kind of breaking up. 

06:53
So I decided to come back here and so when I came back, it was actually kind of the first opportunity that I had to really kind of regroup after my husband had passed away, because you know, the two and a half years prior to that I was just dealing with, you know, looking after my son. There were a lot of things to do with the settling the estate. There were a lot of complications with that. So anyway, when I moved back to Pennsylvania, it was really the first opportunity that I had a little bit of a break. I had the support of my family and so I could kind of regroup and so I started. I'd always done yoga, but on and off. So when I moved back I really took a deep dive into doing yoga and then I decided to do a yoga teacher training course, mainly really just to give me a focus and also so that my practice, so I would keep doing it, so I would know more for myself, not really expecting to become a yoga teacher, but as it turned out I did. 

08:01 - Carol Beringer (Host)
You sure did, I did so. Yeah, so that's, I did, you sure did, I did, yes, and a wonderful yoga teacher, and then, okay, so this portion of your life, like what you know. 

08:12 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
So Alex knew nothing but England. Yes, my son, that's right. 

08:14 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And then he came back here to a family he hadn't seen that much of. 

08:18 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
He was always pretty close with them, which was good, you know they, my parents and my sister, and then I also have a network of cousins and aunts and uncles and we would come back to visit and so, yeah, so there was a relationship there. But no, it was. It was literally coming to a foreign country, yeah, culture shock, yeah Huge culture shock. 

08:39 - Carol Beringer (Host)
It was a culture shock for me too, and going into, like high school, oh he started at middle school. Oh, did he start at middle school? 

08:44 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
He started in eighth grade so he moved back here in eighth grade and it was. 

08:49 - Carol Beringer (Host)
The tail end of middle school too, but the other kids, the tail end. 

08:51 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I know just for a year. 

08:52 - Carol Beringer (Host)
When all the hormones are regaining. 

08:54 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yes, it was. Yeah. 

08:55 - Carol Beringer (Host)
yeah, it was very challenging Because a lot of times, like I, had all brothers and all boys and I I think sometimes because boys don't have except for a cracking voice and get man hair on their legs, they don't have a physical manifestation of going through puberty, so they don't get the same breaks that girls do sometimes, maybe. Yeah, I noticed that because I raised four boys and so I really picked up on it then. Not so much with my brothers. 

09:18
I just thought they were jerks. They were lovely, but they were twins and they were just a lot and I love them dearly. So, yeah, and so that was huge, I mean it was very huge, it was a. 

09:33 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I know there were many times that I questioned my decision. I just thought oh, but now that you're really the right thing, now probably that you're further out and you look back, you really think like, wow, how monumental it is, and thank goodness too because I think that if you, you know, had I really understood kind of the I don't know just the enormity of all the so many changes in such a short time, I probably would have been paralyzed. 

10:08 - Carol Beringer (Host)
So, fortunately, a little bit of. But again, this is this. This whole purpose of this amazing movement is resiliency, like how do you get up every day and not dwell on the other, because there are so many people that do. And I'm glad but this circle, and that's what we're hoping. If any of you out there struggle with anything, know that you can Support there's, play there's, there's, there is, support there is, and you have to be almost strong enough to seek it. Yes, that's very true. 

10:41 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I know that is another thing looking back on those years, I wish that I did reach out for support more than I did. You know, I I really. Sometimes I look back to myself almost as another person. 

10:59 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Well, because I didn't. I wasn't at a place where I had learned yet how to be that vulnerable. 

11:05 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Right. 

11:06 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, and so you are that person that you makes people, welcomes people in enough that they feel safe. 

11:13 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I think, I think one thing that having gone through what I did makes me recognize struggle in other people. Yes, and you know, sometimes I think maybe even this just occurred to me, but sometimes maybe, when I do offer um help or support, it's kind of like almost offering it to the girl that I was then. I say girl because now I'm 57. 

11:39 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I'm never growing up, you know. 

11:42 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I look back and I just think, oh my gosh, I was such a little baby, really Like how did you know? 

11:47 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And then the whole idea is you go through these life events and when you know better, then you can do better. 

11:53 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yes. 

11:54 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I don't know if you have to truly say I recognize that, but somehow you embody it and then it helps. 

12:00 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, it sort of evolves. 

12:02 - Carol Beringer (Host)
It evolves. 

12:03 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
It's just being aware and recognizing and yeah, and so now, and in fact I guess I could bring up Widows Rising- yes, please. 

12:16
So that's sort of how that came about. So my husband passed away in 2008. I had actually just recently become a qualified primary school teacher in England when my husband passed away. So I taught there for a couple of years and then when I moved back to Pennsylvania my teaching qualification was not recognized here. I had gotten the teaching qualification in England. It wasn't recognized here, so I worked in learning support over at Beaumont Elementary School for a few years and I eventually did get my Pennsylvania teaching certificate. 

12:58 - Carol Beringer (Host)
You were determined, I was so determined to get it. 

13:00 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
It took a very long time but I did get the teaching certification, which is just kind of ironic because I never have taught as a you know, an elementary school teacher here. So what happened was I was working in the learning support at Beaumont Elementary School and at the same time that's when I did the yoga teacher training certification. And then just sort of how so often happens, where you just follow the things that interest you and you know, I was just kind of drawn, as I said, to do the yoga teacher training certification, not with an intention of teaching, but towards the end of our course, just before we were certified, an organization was born called Mindfulness Through Movement and that's teaching yoga and mindfulness in city schools. So I started teaching for that. So it was a great combination of my academic education experience and my yoga education experience and so I still teach for that organization now. 

14:12
So is that in charter schools or in public schools it is. We're in a few different. We're in, I think, and this is in the Philadelphia area. I think we're in 20 schools. Wow, we've got 17 teachers in 20 schools. So we're in our 10th year, and it's charter schools, independent mission schools and public schools. It's a combination of schools and we teach kindergarten through eighth grade. So this year I had two schools. I have a third grade at St Barnabas Independent Mission School and seventh grade at Carver High School, which is a STEM school near Temple. 

14:53 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, so it's a great kind of so two magical ages, because you're hitting the double digits at third grade yes, yeah, and they still have that hopefully some innocence. And then you have the getting into the teen years yes, yeah, and the teen years. 

15:13 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
it can be challenging but it's also really gratifying because we could take a deep dive with a lot of the mindfulness concepts and our goal is to teach kind of emotional resilience and give students the tools to really recognize when they're perhaps becoming elevated and learn to calm themselves. 

15:38 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Oh, I remember at the end of the yoga teacher training program where we met and I never intended to teach yoga because I have a Pilates studio, but all movement deepens my knowledge and yoga truly is the original functional movement. Yeah, you know five thousand, six thousand years ago, and that you know. Most other things are born of that yeah but um, during the end of that, there were these two young men, or three, that had grown up in the projects of baltimore they were the. 

16:07 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
They were from the holistic life institute that's what it was In Baltimore, Maryland. And they trained us. So our program sort of the genesis of it was from their program. 

16:20 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I just loved being in their workshops. It was so powerful and they were so wonderful. 

16:25 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
And yeah, yeah, they're, they're amazing, they, they really are kind of it's really a movement now bringing mindfulness into schools, and they are definitely at the forefront of that. They, they do trainings like at the Omega Institute and, I think, at Kripalu. 

16:41 - Carol Beringer (Host)
So they go around the country. So they still are active. They are. 

16:45 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I really respected all they're, so yeah, they have so much foresight, yeah, really, really great. And so our program came sort of from training from them and we've evolved a lot. So now I'm the director of teacher development, so I help to write a curriculum there and help to train teachers. 

17:09 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Your teaching has really Evolved a lot, yeah, for sure. 

17:13 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But also. 

17:14 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I mean, you said you never really had to teach school here. 

17:17 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But you're teaching everywhere. 

17:18 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yes, and you just are a teacher. 

17:21 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Well, it's sort of the and that's one of the things in our program. You have to be a yoga teacher to teach for mindfulness through movement, but a lot of people who teach yoga have not had experience with behavior management in schools, and so that's really the part of it that I help with and, you know, help teach them, explain to them the curriculum, and so we have training and then we also mentor our new teachers now, which is a big change from the beginning of when our program first began, we were kind of just thrown into the schools without a lot of mentoring because it was a new program, but now, 10 years on, we have quite a few experienced teachers that could go in and really help the new teachers figure out, you know, how best to use the curriculum and the behavior management. 

18:15 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, Wow, yeah, and good for those kids that they're willing. 

18:19 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yes. 

18:20 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And that they have people that you know outside their families, because it's so hard sometimes. It's really lovely that they have that outside influence. 

18:27 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, I think it's really like a missing piece in schools now. I think it's really like a missing piece in schools now. Classroom teachers are being expected to do so much more than just teaching academics. You know, a lot of kids are coming to school with fewer social skills. 

18:45 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Because of all the fallout of the quarantine. 

18:47 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Well, post-covid especially definitely. You know a lot of kids have gaps in their education. A lot of the younger kids who missed out on preschool and kindergarten, those years where you learn a lot of the social skills, how to behave in in classrooms, how to interact with other students, that piece is kind of missing. But the teachers, the academic teachers, they have the expectation to move them along to certain goals academically and so they don't have a lot of time to be, you know, specifically teaching those skills. So we really find ourselves filling that gap a lot, you know, helping with that. 

19:31 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And it's not a requirement that children choose to participate. 

19:34 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
No, it's part of their day. 

19:35 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Oh it's part of their day. Yeah, it's not. 

19:37 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
It's not an after school curricular it's, it's built into their day, yeah they're 45 minute classes and it's part of their day, and the schools are recognizing the value of, you know, doing it for behavior management. They find that students are able to, you know, maybe regulate themselves a little bit better, get into conflict less often or resolve conflicts more quickly. 

20:10 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Wow, yeah, so it's exciting, yeah those are amazing skills to teach and acquire. 

20:16 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Well, now, social and emotional learning is a requirement in curriculums in schools and our program fulfills that. So when we first started, we were more movement, more yoga started, we were more movement, more yoga. But now we realized, um, we've evolved to being, uh, not more mindfulness, but equal, probably equal parts of mindfulness, and the movement, of course, enhances that. They. It all goes together. 

20:44 - Carol Beringer (Host)
So let's hop back to the widow's rising and when did that come along? And and, and you know, um, and you even said that when you were first a widow, you would not have probably been ready for this, and I don't know. So you know, explain it and how people could seek your network. 

21:04 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Well, actually I was thinking that I just went off on a tangent, but it will come back together. 

21:08
Because, as the director of teacher development at Mindfulness Through Movement, I'll talk to potential new teachers. So if somebody hears about our program, they're interested in teaching with us, they'll have a conversation with me and I'll explain the program to them. And so, probably about six or maybe even seven years ago, a potential new teacher called me Her name is Sonia Jacobson, and I was explaining the program to her. A friend of hers referred her to our program and she said you know, I think that I'd be interested in teaching this program, teaching for mindfulness through movement. And she said, um, that her husband had passed away um a year or so before and he had had um ALS and so he had had a long illness. So, um, and he had passed away. And I said to her you know, sonia, I told her my story. I said, you know, I understand a little bit of how you're feeling. And I told her my story. And so the two of us became friends. We would meet up from time to time for mindfulness or movement, but also being widows, and I was, you know, sort of further along at this stage than she was, so, yeah, so we developed a bond over that. 

22:42
A few years after that, I was teaching a beginner's course at a yoga studio and there was a student that came that I could tell something was going on with her and she started coming to my classes after the starter series finished and one day after class she was just, you know, opened up to me. She was, you know, she had a big shift. She had a big shift and so she told me that her husband passed away, but probably just six months before. So it was very, very fresh with her and so I put her in touch also with Sonia. They both had places at the shore and she was going down to the shore. Sonia, they both had places at the shore and she was going down to the shore. 

23:35
So, um, the two of them connected over the summer and then the following fall, the three of us would get together for dinner and we would get together for dinner every few months and it was really, it was helpful for all of us. It was very, you know, supportive in a lot of different ways. So, um, you know, supportive in a lot of different ways. So, after maybe a year, year and a half, of just the three of us getting together, sonia said she had a couple of friends who were widows, could they join us? And so, long story short, this group started to develop that there were about eight of us and we would get together every couple of months and we would go for a happy hour, we would um, we went candle making, we had you know, this is magical about pulling people together so we did various different activities and, uh, yeah, everybody, and it's not the sort of thing where we would sit around and tell our sad stories. 

24:31
It's actually kind of. It's really we'll have fun too. So nobody has to talk about their story, but it kind of creates space for people to feel like they want to, right. So it's sort of like just organically grew from there. And then last year, sonia and I said you know, maybe we should open this out to, and we sort of toyed with that for a while. Open it out to, you know, people that we don't know, make this more of a community. So we did. 

25:05
So we started Widows Rising and we now have a website, we have an Instagram page and we hold events monthly so far, although over the summer it may not be quite so frequently so we've been holding events that are open to the general public. And so we started off with a sound healing at Verge Yoga Studio. We started off with a sound healing at Verge Yoga Studio and it was great because Carol, the owner there, did a sound healing for us, and so we've been using that space. And then the following month we did a gentle yoga and yoga nidra, and then we're going to have another one next month. We're also going to have a happy hour. So basically, it's opening out to a lot of different people and it's nice because people are, as I said again, all at different stages. 

26:04 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, and if anybody's not ready, at least you know. If you view this and you know someone that they know something exists. 

26:11 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Because you might not have any idea. 

26:12 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yes and it might be better not to be with people that experienced it but that aren't your family. 

26:18 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, exactly Exactly so. It's just sort of creating a space where you know people. You know we've all been through not the same experience, but similar experiences, but similar experiences, and I always I feel with grieving it's at the same time like deeply personal and individual. It's, you know, very unique to the person who's going through it, but also common and universal. You know it is a part of life. 

26:49 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Well, in general, loneliness is an epidemic. 

26:51 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah and so yeah, and feeling isolated or just even isolated in your thoughts about that part of life. 

26:53 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Well, in general, loneliness is an epidemic, yeah, and so, yeah, and feeling isolated, or just even isolated in your thoughts about that part of you, right, yeah, exactly, and then not even having to talk about it. Like you just know, in this group you're understood already. 

27:03 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Exactly, yeah. And again, some people really, you know, need to share, need to talk about it, and other people don't really want to. Benefit from hearing, but yes benefit from hearing, and also, it's not just about you know the grief, but it's all of these other things. Managing yeah, Children. 

27:26 - Carol Beringer (Host)
You know how to best support children Because, the children probably don't realize there's other children that have lost a parent. 

27:33 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, you know what to do if you want to start dating, and you know how that feels or if you don't want to, and how that feels. I remember some of your stories, yeah and then also, you know a lot of times you know just being financially. A lot of times you know just being financially. Maybe people are all of a sudden in a different situation or feeling uncomfortable about you know how to proceed financially or who they can trust. That's another thing, no-transcript, and you know people aren't always out for your best interests. 

28:13 - Carol Beringer (Host)
So you can feel vulnerable like that, and it's also good for them to see that you've navigated it and are now happily remarried. Yes, yeah, and have blended family and you know your family support. And yeah, and you know, and you had another tragedy during the quarantine my mom passed away. 

28:27 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, yeah, suddenly also. 

28:34 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I mean, even though she wasn't in the optimum, optimum health. 

28:36 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
she was not so unexpected. No, it was. It was unexpected and yeah it was. It was shocking and it was right at the beginning. It was in May of 2020. And it was just that time where everything just seemed to you know, the world just shifted and everything kind of seemed unreal and that added another, definitely added another layer onto that. 

29:02 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And I remember that I learned about something that your dad had that I had never heard about before grief amnesia. 

29:09 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Oh yes, in the immediate aftermath of her passing away, he couldn't remember the events that had, you know, led up to him being in the hospital and hearing about yeah. He fortunately shifted out of it after a few hours, but that was yeah. 

29:29 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I mean, you told me that I'd never heard about that. No, I know, you know it's, yeah, trauma induced, yeah, so yeah me that I'm like you never heard about that? 

29:34 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
No, I know it's, it's, it's, yeah, trauma induced, yeah, so yeah, we've had a lot of a lot of uh different situations like that. But, but even you know, even with that, I um understood kind of what it's like to to be in shock a bit because, um, when my husband passed away it was one morning when we were getting ready for work and you know I we had to call the ambulance and it was a traumatic morning. Let's just put it at that. 

30:08 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And you deal with it like you really don't have any choice. Yes, so you kind of operate on two levels. 

30:13 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
So one I was very practical going about doing all the things that I had to do but on another level was just kind of very detached. 

30:24 - Carol Beringer (Host)
It was a very out of body experience. 

30:28 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
So, and I think my father had a little bit of that so having experienced that, I kind of understood a little bit of what he was going through. 

30:39 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, but I've just always admired how you just navigate all this stuff. Well, I wouldn't say it's all been smooth sailing for sure, but still, you know when people are in the thick of things. Sometimes they don't see their way through it, but you don't have a choice but to go through it. 

30:58 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But, you know, I always have felt that we all have within us the tools that we need to get through anything. You know, and it's just a matter of accessing them. You know, and it's just a matter of accessing them. So that that's a that is a thought that I had before any of this happened. So I really do think that. 

31:27 - Carol Beringer (Host)
That's an innate resilience. So you have it, I think I have it. I know your sister has it, yeah, and then the other. You know the whole. You know that's what we want to let other people know that even if you don't feel that you have it in you, you can find it. I do. 

31:41 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I think, if you allow yourself to, I think a lot of your ability to access it. 

31:46 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And it's oftentimes outside circumstances that people feel like they can't yeah, even if they feel strongly about dealing with something. So I mean it's really tricky with it. But yeah but you know that they're, you know I hope that the people that I have on this program, that, um, you know, you feel that you could, you know, write to hello at carolbarringercom get in touch with these people. 

32:10
You know you don't have to remember any of the the specifics or go click on something. I love to build a network. I build and rebuild my network either socially, and especially now my priority is taking care of my health as I get older and make sure that I have everything in place, and I've always done that and so. 

32:36
But I want to ask you so okay, so your yoga and mindfulness meditation mentor extraordinaire and Widows Rising is something that you know, you've really you know, just I feel like it's just starting now, but I can tell when I talk to you how you're inspired by it and um, but aside from all those things like I, I know things about you, but what are the things that really that you do for yourself that are just totally apart from any responsibilities? 

33:09 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
um, what are the things I do? Well, I do, I do love, I love. Obviously I love yoga. So I do a lot of that and you know that is something that I do because I enjoy it, and just a benefit of it is that it really it helps. 

33:28 - Carol Beringer (Host)
It's movement, just my general well-being. 

33:30 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yes, so that's good. I have been trying to do incorporate things with more weights now, so I'm trying to branch out. 

33:40 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, I've done that recently too. Maybe it's in the wind, I don't know. Yeah. 

33:44 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Well, I had gone away for a weekend to celebrate my sister's birthday with our cousins and they were all talking about how important weight training is as you get older for your bone density, which I've known, but now I am actually you know trying to to incorporate that. 

34:02 - Carol Beringer (Host)
You know that was a lot of weight bearing. It does, yeah, it does. 

34:07 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But just trying to to branch out a little bit and switch it up. There's have you seen the Julia Julia Louis-Dreyfus? She has a podcast called Wiser Than Me, oh, wow. And she, what she's doing is she is interviewing women that are older than she is and trying to get their wisdom, and it's a great premise for a podcast. And I can't remember, I think it's part of this one. That's why I was inspired. 

34:35 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Well, I was actually encouraged to do it because, you know, I'm in my 70s. 

34:39 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yes. 

34:41 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And I plan on making it to 100. So, yeah, so, and only if I'm this vital. I mean really that's, that's you know, you know it's and it's fun. I mean, it really is enjoyable. 

34:55
But I think that with movement, with yoga and my apologize movement starts you. It really gives you a starting place and then you feel better about yourself. So then anything you learn when you know better, you do better. And I find in my studio people come and they just feel better about themselves and then they do better, and then they just continue to do better and move forward. So all of this movement is movement and movement and movement and then, yeah, so, but I know, so speaking about movement. 

35:21 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, go ahead what I was going to say is, on that podcast, one of the guests and I can't remember if it was Isabel Allende, the author, or Jane Fonda, the author or Jane Fonda, but one of them was talking about how intentionally they went forward in their lives and how, when they turned 60, they thought of this as their third chapter, right, and what they wanted to do in their third chapter. And I'm 57 now and so you know, basically 60 is knocking on the door and I thought, do you know what? That? I loved that idea of really like okay, you're, I'm coming into my third chapter, Like how do I want that to look? And, um, so what you said about you want to live to a hundred, but if you're moving and I want to be a vital human, yeah, and be vital, yeah. 

36:18
So I yeah, so I have been and it's possible. 

36:23 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Oh yeah, easily. It is Not easily, it is for sure Not easily. 

36:25 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
But it's possible. 

36:26 - Carol Beringer (Host)
It's possible, but you have to you have to be an advocate of your own. 

36:31 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
So now, like I'm trying to create habits that will, you know, be able to help me sustain that you know going forward, I kind of think I've done it every decade. What? Just a thought of your chapter. 

36:47 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, Now that my chapters are getting shorter, I'm going five years at a time, but yeah. 

36:51 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I know it's fun. 

36:54 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I actually enjoy it. I like to play that game like what would you do if you like won the? 

36:56 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
lottery, or what would you do? 

36:57 - Carol Beringer (Host)
if you could, if you could just choose any way of being, or you know, we all kind of did a lot of things and and probably up to our 30s, like what was expected of us yes, you know so you wanted to please everybody and do the right things and be the right person and grow into their. And then you realize that you know and, and at some point people just continue that. 

37:16
But sometimes you get the opportunity to say I'm doing something different yeah exactly, I do it a lot and I don't mind change, and no you're, and you're great at that. 

37:26 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I mean, you're very inspirational in that regard. No, no you are, but like, but but I one thing I um love about you or I admire about you is you are always learning new things. You're always taking, you know, new trainings and courses, because I'm attempting Spanish. 

37:46 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Oh, that's one of the things I want to do. Oh my, gosh. 

37:49 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Do you know I I um studied Spanish in high school I I studied Spanish in high school. I had studied Spanish in high school. Maybe next year we'll do this whole podcast in Spanish. 

38:00 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Oh, we might. We might that would be super fun. 

38:02 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
And I never, you know, was very good at it. I don't think I really gave it much effort. And then, when I was living in England, we would vacation in Spain Because it's close by. 

38:15 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, it's close by. 

38:17 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
That's kind of like the Florida for people in Spain. It's when you want some sun you go there. So when I was in my 30s I did take Spanish again and I was starting to get a. You know, I was pretty decent. I think. I'm pretty terrible, but it's fine. 

38:31 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I was able to express myself. I had a decent when. 

38:32 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I'm pretty terrible, but I I, I was able to express myself. I had a problem when they then responded so quickly and I was like wait a minute, but um, yeah, so I would like to uh take that up again. Um, and I am not good at learning self-paced for something like that. 

38:51 - Carol Beringer (Host)
So I I do have to. Yeah, I go in spurts, take it, but I do have a tutor like that, so I do have to. 

38:53
Yeah, I go in spurts take it, but I do have a tutor every week that I do. That's good with and yeah, so I'll tell you all about it when you're ready. So, okay, but one of the things that I really admire that okay. So you told me, I think that you want to attempt Liz as a traveler. Oh, yeah, traveling and reading. So those are the things when I think of Liz and what her passions are like. 

39:12 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
She's always recommending a great book and the last one was the Glassmaker, and so now I'm doing the Girl with the Pearl Earring, because it was the same author Tracy. 

39:21 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Chevalier, tracy Chevalier. And then I was so intrigued by the book and knowing it was the Girl with the Pearl Earring, and that I watched a TED Talk of how she decides to write a book and what is the impetus. 

39:36 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Oh, it's really cool. 

39:37 - Carol Beringer (Host)
And so anyway. So I love that, because then I get excited about something and I just go on this bender and so yeah, and then your husband wants to see every state, he wants to go to every state, and you want to go to every country. 

39:51 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I want to go as many countries as you can. No, you know what? I want to go to every state and you want to go to every country. 

39:56 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I want to go as many countries as you can. No, you know what? I want to go to every continent, continent, okay, so, yeah, yeah. 

39:58 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
So I knew it was yeah and actually it was very cute because for our second wedding anniversary, so we've just been married four years, I can't remember, maybe it was the third. Anyway, the the traditional gift is cloth and he was so clever. He got a outline of a map of the United States and we color in the states we visited each time we we go to one. So he said that he he's much closer to all 50 than I am and I'm not actually that bothered, to be honest, if I get to all 50. I said some of the states I'm like you know you could take somebody else there yeah okay, yeah, you want to hit? 

40:37 - Carol Beringer (Host)
your boys yeah. 

40:38 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I'm like Hawaii and Alaska, definitely take me. 

40:40 - Carol Beringer (Host)
How many continents have you hit? 

40:43 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Oh, let's see. I guess Asia, central America, that's not a continent, north America, europe. 

40:54 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Africa, so I've got Antarctica. Everybody loves that trip, I know I know, that's what I heard. 

40:57 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
I have some friends that went there a couple years ago. Eleanor's gone, yeah, eleanor went. 

41:02 - Carol Beringer (Host)
A mutual friend in another episode that. I hope you all watch every week, and so yeah. 

41:08 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, eleanor went yeah. So what do I have? I guess I've got. I haven't been to South America, which just seems you know yeah. Neglectful. 

41:18 - Carol Beringer (Host)
I think we covered everything I mean. Clearly, I don't have to ask you how you intentionally resolved to be resilient every day, day in and day out, because you just live it. 

41:28 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Oh well, I'm trying. Yeah, I know it's a work in progress, it is, but I think a lot, like I said, I do think a lot of it is the attitude that you have. And you know I do. I firmly believe. And I remember, after my husband passed away very soon, after, my parents came over straight away, they were so helpful and when they had to leave to come back to the States and leave us there, you know my mother was just so worried about us and you know she, I really and I said to my mother and I remember I said you know, I know that I am going to be okay, I know that we're going to be okay and I know that I'll figure out how to get through this. I said I just have to like, I'm like everybody just has to shut up. 

42:33
So I could just listen and really go inward and and find that, and I, and I believe that we all have that, and it's probably why I was drawn to yoga, um, even before this happened, because you know it really allows you to tap into that place of strength that we all do have. It's just whether we allow ourselves or, you know, take the time to access it. Yeah. 

42:56
And I think it's any movement thing I mean you know it is yeah, I agree yeah, Because it's a basis of health and fitness, and I think it might have even been. 

43:03 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Joseph Pilates has done a lot of Pilates quotes, but it's or it could have been juvenile way back in the like first century. But it's something about having a sound mind and a fit body and I think it goes back to the first century. I think it was Juvenal who was a philosopher at that time. So it's something I've used in some of my presentations. 

43:19 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
And there is a connection that science is now recognizing and understanding that you know we do have this ability to find strength, to find resilience. 

43:31 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, and you know, and with integrity, because it just and it builds integrity. But there's one more story that you have to tell before we say goodbye, about when you came back from england. This just came to me because I'm thinking about the things that I know that liz is amazing with and loves and is passionate about, and the other thing is animals and service dogs and all that business. But your dog when you moved from um rudy rudy, when you came from, what kind of dog was? 

43:56 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
it. You came from england. 

43:57
And yes, and you had to get, so I had a liam burger I had a liam burger and, oh my gosh, if, if you've never seen these dogs, look them up. He was just beautiful. It's a mountain dog that looks like a lion um, leon, french for lion so um, and he was probably about 150, 160 pounds. When he stood up with his paws on my shoulders he was as tall as me, and so I, um, I moved. When we moved back to america, my son and I moved first and he was shipped afterwards because we had to wait till we got in our house. Anyway, they had to make a special crate to ship him because the regular crates were not big enough, and so he flew in, and I remember it was. 

44:47
He flew in in August and the flight arrived at night and I was so worried about the heat, so I go to collect him from the cargo place. Little did I know I had to then take his papers to customs before they'd release him to me. So then I drove, I go to customs, I do all the paperwork and then I go back to the cargo place, and his crate was on one of those forklift type things. It was still on the forklift and I was talking to the woman who ran the place as we were walking there and my son was talking and when Rudy heard our voices he sounded like Chewbacca and it was like he was trying to talk to us. He was not barking, he was just making this noise. And it was like he was trying to talk to us. He was not barking, he was just making this noise. And the whole forklift started to move and all the guys working there were like what the hell is that? And so they just opened up the crate and he just bolted towards us and it was amazing. 

45:49 - Carol Beringer (Host)
He was the best. 

45:50 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
He was such a good dog yeah. 

45:52 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Yeah, but thank you for your time. This was so much fun. It's great to catch up, and sharing our stories, you know, welcomes other people to experience getting out of their comfort zone, I think. 

46:07 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Yeah, definitely. 

46:08 - Carol Beringer (Host)
Or growing their comfort zone. 

46:10 - Liz Bernardi Seaden (Guest)
Or just having the confidence that you, you do you have everything you need within you to you know, be resilient and to reach out to those that you already have and share their resilience with you yeah, all right, well, thanks, thank you.