Quietly Autistic at Last
Quietly Autistic at Last
A podcast for the women who were always "a little different"—but never had the words for why.
Hosted by Dr. Allison Sucamele, a woman diagnosed with autism later in life, this podcast explores the quiet, often-overlooked experiences of neurodivergent women who spent years—sometimes decades—masked, misunderstood, or misdiagnosed.
Each episode is a gentle unraveling of what it means to be quietly autistic at last: the grief of being missed, the relief of being named, the power of self-recognition, and the beauty of finally feeling seen.
Whether you’re newly diagnosed, self-identifying, or just beginning to wonder… this space is for you. Tender truths, lived stories, unmasking, and self-compassion—one quiet conversation at a time.
Episodes
25 episodes
# 24 - Why the Gym Works but Crowds Don’t: Autism, Context, and the Nervous System
Why can you handle the gym, but not a crowded restaurant, party, or school event?In this episode, Dr. Allison Sucamele gently unpacks a question so many late-diagnosed autistic women carry with confusion and shame: If I can tolerate ...
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Episode 24
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11:28
# 23 - The Cost of Mislabeling Autistic Burnout as Depression
So many late-diagnosed autistic women were told they were depressed when what they were actually experiencing was burnout.In this episode, Dr. Allison Sucamele explores why autistic burnout is so often misdiagnosed as depression in women...
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Episode 23
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9:59
# 22 - Not Reckless, Regulating: Autism, Adrenaline, & the Lives We Lived Before Diagnosis
Why did so many late-diagnosed autistic women chase intensity when they were younger?In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, Dr. Allison Sucamele explores the often-unspoken connection between autism, dopamine, masking, tra...
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Episode 22
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11:05
# 21 - Micromanaged: Why the Autistic Brain Shuts Down Under Control
Have you ever felt like someone was constantly watching you - hovering, correcting, checking, managing - not because you were doing anything wrong, but because they needed control to feel calm?In today’s episode of Quietly Au...
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Episode 21
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15:58
# 20 - I’m Not Arguing, I’m Clarifying: When Needing Details Gets Misread
Have you ever asked for clarification - only to be hit with, “Why are you arguing with me?”If you’re autistic, you may know this moment intimately: you’re not trying to fight, you’re trying to understand. You’re trying to follow...
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Episode 20
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32:18
# 19 - Dating After Diagnosis: From Adaptation to Choice
Dating later in life after a late autism diagnosis is not simply about meeting new people - it’s about meeting yourself with language, context, and long-overdue permission.In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, Dr. Allison...
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Episode 19
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14:44
# 18 - Why Neurodivergent People Thrive in Environments That Question Tradition
What if the problem was never your brain but the environment asking it to pretend?In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore why many neurodivergent people thrive in spaces that question tradition rather than worsh...
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Episode 18
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12:38
# 17 - Why “High-Functioning” Misses the Point - Especially for Late-Diagnosed Women
“You’re so high-functioning.”It’s a phrase many late-diagnosed autistic women hear when they finally share their diagnosis - often offered as reassurance, praise, or disbelief. And almost always, it misses the point.In this episod...
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Episode 17
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12:25
# 16 - Your Spoons Are Telling the Truth
Spoon Theory is often explained as a simple metaphor for limited energy, but for autistic adults, especially late-identified autistic women, it’s far more than that.In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we slow Spoon Theo...
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Episode 16
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18:30
# 15 - Why the Holidays Can Exacerbate Autistic Traits in Women
Why do the holidays -this supposedly magical, sparkling, joy-filled season - feel so overwhelming, so intense, and so deeply dysregulating? And why do autistic traits seem to get louder, sharper, and more noticeable than ever?If you’ve e...
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Episode 15
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16:49
# 14 - Why Travel Feels So Hard for Autistic Women: Anxiety, Separation, & the Nervous System
Today’s episode explores something many late-diagnosed autistic women carry quietly and often alone: the intense stress, dread, and nervous-system-level anxiety that comes with travel, and the fear that rises even when someone else is ...
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Episode 14
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24:34
# 13 - Being Organized Doesn’t Mean It’s Not Hard to Stay Organized
Being organized doesn’t mean it’s easy to stay organized—and no, that’s not a moral failing. For many autistic women, it’s a neurological reality.In this deeply validating episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore wha...
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Episode 13
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19:30
# 12 - Asking for Accommodations vs. Making Excuses: Reclaiming Your Needs Without Apology
Today’s episode explores a topic many of you have been asking for: the difference between asking for accommodations and “making excuses,” why these requests feel so vulnerable for autistic women, and how to finally release the fear of being mis...
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Episode 12
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12:43
# 11 - Autumn Clarity: Letting Old Versions Fall Away
This episode is a quiet meditation on change — the kind that doesn’t always feel exciting or triumphant, but necessary. We’ll explore how autistic and sensitive nervous systems experience emotional and seasonal transitions, the neuroscience beh...
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Episode 11
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13:59
# 10 - Sensory Sanctuary: Designing a Life That Soothes Your System
This episode isn’t about self-care as an abstract concept — it’s about survival, mental-health preservation, and learning how to exist in your body without constantly falling apart from sensory overload.In “Sensory Sanctuary,” we explore...
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Episode 10
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36:36
# 9 - Autistic Halloween: Sensory, Social, & Soul-Level Realities
For many, Halloween is a night of fun, costumes, and candy. But for late-diagnosed autistic women, it can be something much deeper, and more overwhelming. In this episode, Dr. Allison Sucamele explores why a sensory-heavy, socially-...
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Episode 9
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20:30
# 8 - The Double Voice Within: Navigating the Autistic Inner Monologue
“I am speaking on the outside. But I am also narrating, analyzing, and negotiating on the inside. Two tracks. One body. One mind.”Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, the space where we stop performing, start understanding, and ...
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Episode 8
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20:12
# 7 - When “Rest” Isn’t Recovery
Today we’re diving into something many late-identified autistic women know in our bones: when we don’t get real downtime — the kind with true quiet, low demands, and zero masking — our systems don’t just get tired, they get deplete...
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20:20
# 6 - Autistic Fatigue — The Weight of Constant Adaptation
Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, the space where we stop performing, start understanding, and learn to live by the rhythm of our own nervous systems. I’m your host, Dr. Allison Sucamele.In this episode, we explore a kind of ...
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Episode 6
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15:28
# 5 - When You Finally Understand Yourself… and Others Still Don’t
In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore the quiet power of self-understanding after a late-in-life autism diagnosis. While diagnosis can feel like a homecoming, it doesn’t guarantee that others will suddenly understand—...
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Episode 5
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14:33
# 4 - The Split of Late-in-Life Diagnosis: Freedom & Grief
In this episode, The Split of Late-in-Life Diagnosis: Freedom & Grief, we explore the paradox many autistic women face when discovering their diagnosis later in life. For some, it feels like a light switching on—clarity, self-compa...
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7:36
#3 - The Mask We Wear: Survival, Burnout, & Returning to Our Authentic Selves
Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, hosted by Dr. Allison Sucamele—psychology researcher, educator, and late-diagnosed autistic woman.In this episode, we dive into one of the most common yet misunderstood aspects of the autisti...
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Episode 3
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10:25
# 2 - Once Upon a Question: My Quiet Journey to “At Last”
One student’s simple question changed the course of my life. In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, I share the story of how a moment in my classroom planted the seed that led me toward an autism diagnosis at 48. Part personal me...
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Episode 2
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15:15
# 1 - You Were Never Wrong About Yourself - The Diagnosis
Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, a podcast for women diagnosed with autism later in life—women who spent years, even decades, masked, misunderstood, or misdiagnosed. I'm your host, Dr. Allison Sucamele. In this debut ep...
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Episode 1
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10:57