Don't Quote Me ... It's Probably Nothing
A conspiracy theory podcast for the highly curious and slightly high.
Ever find yourself spiraling down a rabbit hole at 2 a.m., questioning pigeons, the calendar, or why your microwave feels off? Same.
Don’t Quote Me... It’s Probably Nothing is a solo deep-dive into the internet’s weirdest theories, half-baked history, and the kind of “wait, but what if?” moments that make you side-eye reality. Sometimes there’s a guest. Most of the time, it’s just me, some weed, and way too many tabs open ... in my brain and on my computer.
I’m not a journalist. I’m not an expert.
I just have Wi-Fi, weed, and more questions than answers.
Is it true? Who knows.
Don’t quote me…
It’s probably nothing.
Episodes
24 episodes
Did We Even Land on the Moon?
What if the greatest achievement in human history… was filmed in a basement? 👀This week, I put on my tinfoil hat and go full conspiracy-mode, diving headfirst into one of the most iconic debates of all time, did we actually land on th...
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Season 1
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Episode 24
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29:29
True Crime Tuesday: The Dumbest Alibis Ever
Some people lie to save themselves.Others lie so badly they solve their own crimes.This week on True Crime Tuesday, I dive headfirst into the dumbest alibis ever told from the “time traveler” who blamed aliens...
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Season 1
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Episode 23
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21:31
The Halloween Special: Ghosts, Ghouls & Questionable Candy
Grab your candy and lock your doors, it’s the Don’t Quote Me… It’s Probably Nothing Halloween Special!This week, I dive deep into the real origins of Halloween. From ancient Celtic fire festivals to modern-day su...
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Season 1
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Episode 22
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21:16
Trick or Crime: Halloween Chaos Edition
This week on True Crime Tuesday, we’re celebrating spooky season the only way we know how ... by mixing true crime, bad decisions, and questionable costume choices.From the infamous Candy Man who poisoned Halloween candy,...
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Season 1
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Episode 21
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17:15
Whispers in the Hills: The Cursed Side of Appalachia
Twenty episodes of chaos ... and we're celebrating by heading straight into cursed territory.From the eerie legends of the Not-Deer and Appalachian Mimics to towns that just vanished off the map, and staircases in the woods that lead to ...
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Season 1
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Episode 20
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30:16
True Crime Tuesday: Criminal Masterminds (Who Weren't)
This week on True Crime Tuesday, we’re diving into the dark side of dumb, the so-called “criminal masterminds” who forgot to bring their brains to the briefing.From a crypto “genius” who used hotel loyalty points to fund ...
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Season 1
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Episode 19
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17:22
Welcome To Cursedville: Five Towns You Shouldn't Visit (But Totally Want To)
This week, we're taking a haunted road trip across America straight into the places maps forgot and ghosts refuse to leave.From the town that's been burning for 60 years to a forest where everyone went mad, a government-seized town shrou...
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Season 1
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Episode 18
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41:42
True Crimes Tuesday - Dumb Crimes That Escalated Fast
This week on True Crime Tuesday, we're diving head first into the world of impulsive decisions, chaotic energy, and criminals who clearly didn't think things through.From a gas station theft gone explosively wrong, to a high-spe...
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Season 1
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Episode 17
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14:08
Don't Mess With Ouiji Boards
What do a stolen cemetery rock, a closet attic door, and a flip phone recording that says "Get out" have in common? Yeah ... we're talking Ouija boards.This week, I dive into the history of the board that somehow went from Victorian parl...
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Season 1
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Episode 16
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28:06
True Crime Tuesday - Feasts, Floorboards & WTF?!
Welcome to the first-ever True Crime Tuesday, where the cases are weird, the commentary is chaotic, and the only thing scarier than crimes .. are the people committing them.this week, we're serving up three true stories that prove reality i...
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Season 1
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Episode 15
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14:15
Frozen Fear & Midnight Knocks
Episode 14 - Frozen Fear & Midnight KnocksIn this double-dose of spooky season chills, I'm tackling two of the creepiest mysteries out there.First up: The Dyatlov Pass. Nine Hikers venture into the frozen Ural Mount...
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Season 1
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Episode 14
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26:29
The Unlucky Episode
Episode 13 – The Unlucky EpisodeSome say 13 is just a number. Others say it’s cursed. In this week’s special “unlucky episode,” we lean all the way in.From Loki crashing a dinner in Valhalla, to presidents daring fate in ...
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Season 1
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Episode 13
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22:01
Vatican Secrets: Lost Gospels, Hidden Vaults & Papal Mysteries
Episode 12 – Vatican Secrets: Lost Gospels, Hidden Vaults & Papal MysteriesWhat is the Vatican hiding? Is it just dusty paperwork and centuries of church memos … or are there secret gospels, forbidden treasures, and enough sca...
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Season 1
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Episode 12
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43:17
Royal Family Conspiracies: Diana, Reptilians, & Scandals in the Crown
Episode 11 – Royal Family Conspiracies: Diana, Reptilians & Scandals in the CrownFrom Princess Diana’s mysterious death (or escape?), to Prince Andrew’s Pizza Express alibi, to theories that Queen Elizabeth was secretly a sh...
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Season 1
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Episode 11
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33:42
The Grateful Dead: Psycedelics, Spies, and Strange Theories
Episode 10: The Grateful Dead: Psychedelics, Spies, and Strange TheoriesWhat if the Grateful Dead weren’t just a band? What if the tie-dye, the endless jams, and the devoted Deadhead culture were all tangled up with CIA e...
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Season 1
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Episode 10
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35:43
Quantum Immortality and Near Death Time Glitches
Episode 9: Quantum Immortality & Near-Death GlitchesWhat if you never actually die? What if, in every near-death moment, your consciousness just… slides into another timeline where you survive?In this episode, ...
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Season 1
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Episode 9
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40:10
Disney Conspiracy Theories - Magic, Mystery, and Mouse Ears
Get ready to step behind the curtain of the happiest place on earth and dive into some of the wildest Disney conspiracy theories out there! From rumors of Walt Disney being cryogenically frozen (spoiler alert: he wasn't) to hidden adult jokes s...
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Season 1
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Episode 8
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30:12
Mysteries in the Mountains: Tales of Appalachian Lore
Episode 7: Mysteries in the Mountains - Tales of Appalachian LoreStep into the misty mountains and winding hollers of Appalachia, where legends come alive and the line between myth and reality blurs. In this episode, we dive...
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Season 1
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Episode 7
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41:03
The Satanic Panic
Step back into the wild, weird world of the 1980s.Satanic Panic: when fear, hysteria, and rumors of secret satanic cults rocked America's daycares and living rooms. From daycare drama to media madness, this episode dives deep into one of...
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Season 1
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Episode 6
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20:23
Hollywood Conspiracies: MJ, Secret Societies & Cursed Films
Dive into the wild, mysterious, and sometimes spooky world of Hollywood conspiracies. In this episode, we explore the enduring rumors that Michael Jackson might still be alive, uncover the secret society hand signs and symbolism flashing across...
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Season 1
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Episode 5
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22:43
Project Blue Beam
Project Blue Beam — The Ultimate Government Light Show?What if the sky isn’t just the sky? In this episode, I dive deep into Project Blue Beam — the conspiracy theory that claims the government plans to fake an alien invasion or d...
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Season 1
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Episode 4
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36:48
The Gateway Tapes
Episode 3: The Gateway Tapes — Brain Hacking, Astral Travel, and CIA SecretsEver wonder what happens when 1980s government tech meets cosmic consciousness? In this episode, we dive deep into the Gateway Experience — a CIA...
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Season 1
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Episode 3
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28:29
Simulation Theory
🎮 Episode 2 – Simulation TheoryWhat if your life isn’t real? What if that time you put your phone in the fridge was less “oops” and more… code glitch? In this episode, we dive deep into Simulation Theory — the idea that real...
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Season 1
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Episode 2
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19:38
The Phantom Time Hypothesis
What if it's not 2025 ... but actually 1728? In this chaotic kickoff episode, I dive into the Phantom Time Hypothesis. The theory that nearly 300 years of history were totally made up by a bored emperor, a mathy pope, and some extremely sketchy...
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Season 1
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Episode 1
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14:32