Getting Kinky, with Phylystyne
A guide to BDSM, Ethical Non-Monogamy, multiple dynamics, polyamory, what it's like to be a Sadist, and how to approach BDSM sensibly
Episodes
22 episodes
BDSM 122 - The Hero's Journey
For those unfamiliar with The Hero's Journey, it is the structure that almost all myth, legend and fiction follows. And it applies to many things in life, but BDSM has its own particular take on it, for both Dom and sub. What is the Hero's Jour...
BDSM 121 - It's Just A Number
Father Time does a number on us all, so how do we remain positive kinksters as we get older, and bodies don't look, work or feel like they used to?Kink, sex and emotion are all affected by time and age, so navigating that for a positive ...
BDSM 120 - The Big O
Orgasms. Aren't they fun?Now, what happens when we surrender control of them to someone else?In this episode we explore orgasm control in many of its forms, from edging to forced orgasms, chastity to squirting. And look at why sur...
BDSM 119 - Rough Stuff
Consensual non-consent.Fun, challenging, potentially emotionally devastating, what we are doing here is playing with fear and power. In any other circumstances the law would be getting involved, but we are making this consensual, so what...
BDSM 118 - Hitty Things!
Oh, who doesn't love a bit of impact play? From over the knee spanking to Florentining floggers, hitty things offer a massive range of ways to explore, and for a Dom to leave their mark...
BDSM 117 - Pretty Red Flags
How do you know if a new potential partner is safe to play with? We look at vetting, what red flags look like, what beige flags might mean, and what happens when you meet someone who skirts past your careful vetting technique.And what ab...
BDSM 116 - The Balancing Act
New Relationship Energy (NRE), limerence, infatuation... getting into a new thing with a new person is intense! Brain chemistry changes, moods are affected, exhilaration abounds.But that's a potent, heady mix, and can be addictive.
BDSM 115 - B is for Bondage
The B in BDSM. And it covers such a wide variety of things, so here's an introduction to all things Bondage, of which we will delve into detail in future episodes.So, blindfolds, hoods, gags, cuffs, restraints, and then all manner of rop...
BDSM 114 - Sadist calling
This whole SM part of BDSM; what does that all mean? What does it mean to be a Sadist? Or indeed a Masochist?As your venerable host is indeed a Sadist, expect several episodes on this theme, starting with an overview of what sadism is ab...
BDSM 113 - It's hypnotic, isn't it?
Well done if you recognised the quote from Roxanne, you're officially as old as Me.A break from the fundamentals, to get into a kink I really enjoy; erotic hypnosis.What is it? Can anyone be hypnotised? How does it work? What's it...
BDSM 112 - It's over. Now what?
Endings are shit. But they happen.Whether it's a one-time thing, a brief encounter, a scene, a relationship, or somewhere in between, things end. So what does good, mediocre and crap look like in an ending?From ghosting to relatio...
BDSM 111 - Ethical non-monogamy in all its flavours
It's not cheating, but what does ENM look like?What forms do honest open relationships take?Jealousy and compersion - what are they, and are they really opposites?And how do we tell when either jealousy or compersion is a p...
BDSM 110 - Punishments
When we have Rules - or any other form of structure to the dynamic - and one of those Rules gets broken, what are the consequences? Does it matter the nature of the infraction? Does every consequence have to be po-faced and serious?Join ...
BDSM 109 - Rules and Rituals
OK, we have looked at protocol, but how is protocol implemented? And what about how behaviour is directed? Well, Rules are the basis of structure for the dynamic. But what do we mean by a Rule? What does it govern? What's the scope, context and...
BDSM 108 - Collars, and other protocols
Ah, the BDSM collar; who doesn't want to earn one? But what do they really signify? are there different types? (yes)And collars are only functional in the context of protocol, so let's have a dive into what protocol is all about, why it ...
BDSM 107 - Who are these submissives?
In this episode, we look at the archetypes that submissives present as. Not a one-size-fits-none, most actual people will blend some of these in how they are. But the archetypes give us a map to understand responses, reactions, beha...
BDSM 106 - The shapes of D/s
D/s can be a language between two people, so what are the dialects that might be in place, and how do those nuances impact the perception and experience of that dynamic?In this episode we delve into the various shapes and models for D/s,...
BDSM 105 - Aftercare
Episode 4 ended as the scene came to a close, so now it's time for aftercare. Fundamental, but not everyone needs the same level, so what does good look like?
BDSM 104 - Planning The Scene
So, negotiations and preparation have been done, and it's time to think about what happens in the scene. What planning needs to take place?
BDSM 103 - Consent, Safewords and Managing when things go wrong
Better safe(word) than sorry...Consent isn't just a simple yes, and when things go awry, it's always better to be prepared. Join Me as we look at getting ready to scene by understanding consent, setting the right safeword, and being prep...