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Fish & A Rice Cake
Our explicit opinions, rants, mistakes and lessons from our lives in fitness!
Join Jake & Jake on the couch,
Every week we sit down to spill the beans on all the little dark and dirty secrets of the fitness industry.
There's some good, some bad and definitely some ugly!
We're going to give you everything we know to help you cut through the fitness 'guff' that plagues our screens and minds.
We're keeping it simple, straightforward and if you've got a sh*t sense of humour like us, just a bit entertaining.
(But not too entertaining, we can't have Jake thinking he could make it in stand up again!)
So whap the kettle on, put your feet up and prepare yourself,
For the (actually educated) fitness rants of two normal blokes/coaches at the top of their game!
Episodes
103 episodes
You NEED More Muscle (NOT Less Fat)
Know you need a kick up the arse to get dropping some body fat but not ready to put money down for coaching? Download our free soft to shredded 6 week fat loss challenge below. Everything you need to know what to eat, how to train and how much ...
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The 100th Episode Announcement
Know you need a kick up the arse to get dropping some body fat but not ready to put money down for coaching? Download our free soft to shredded 6 week fat loss challenge below. Everything you need to know what to eat, how to train and how much ...
Jake Comes Clean...
It's confession time,And Jake has something he needs to get off his chest...--------------------------------------------------Need a kick up the arse to get dropping some body fat but not ready to put money down for coachin...
The Physique Blueprint
"I just wanna look bigger & leaner"Well, this is how you do it.The exact blueprint you need to follow to get there,And what to make sure you don't fall into the trap of getting distracted by tht's keeping you ...
The first plan is the worst
The first plan we write for every client is the worst.It has to be because we're only just getting to know who we're working with and how they work and respond to a plan.BUT we know even saying that,It's still a better plan...
The diets that won't keep you lean in 2026
Keto, carnivore, intermittent fasting, meal plans, slimming world... we could go on.There's a reason WHY all these extremes are great for losing weight,But terrible for keeping it off.Because getting lean isn't that hard, i...
Gain Muscle Not Fat | Here's how...
Most people fail to build muscle because,They don’t train hard enough.They get fat too quick.Both of which we’ve done plenty by the way…Building muscle and staying lean is TOUGH.Knowing you’re on the right pa...
How to finish the year with less fat & more muscle
How's that January buzz going? Still smashing the sessions or are things starting to drop off?If it is, don't panic, you're one of many!It's our first recorded episode of 2026 so what better time to map out how the "normal year"...
The one phrase keeping you out of shape in 2026
"The week was going well until...".We've all said it at some point.Some more than others...It's the sentence that brings your entire week crashing down!We can't tell you the amount of times we've heard this in check ...
We failed in 2025...
Now we could sit here and sell the story that last year was the best year we've ever had for coaching.We grew the team to biggest it's ever been,We put the most amount of clients through shoots we ever have,And had the grea...
The mindset that will build your physique & business in 2026
You're going to have sh*t weeks.There's no escaping that.You'll also have class weeks which will feel amazing.But wether it's been a stinker or a belter.You have to have the same response."Don't get too low on...
When to get a Physique Coach VS a Business Coach
Decide to become a coach.Make an IG page.Hire a business mentor.Get next to no signs ups,Wonder what the hell you're doing wrong...So where did the part about actually having a coach yoursel...
3 things we hate about online coaching
Not to be a pair of negative Nellies,Because despite our 24/7 moaning and rants,We do actually love our jobs.But when we look around at the industry and we see what some other coaches are doing,We can get instantly a...
Why you need to diet on less calories than you think
It's more popular right now to go about telling you that you can,"Get in shape eating the foods you love"That's what most coaches will plaster all over their instagram pages.But the reality is,You can't.Actual...
What the f*ck even is online coaching?!
A personalised Training programmeA nutrition planWeekly check ins24/7 WhatsApp support...God we're boring ourselves just writing that out...😴 Let us tell you now, that isn't what Online C...
Why you should live more like a bodybuilder
We're not saying to go out and raid the next GASP clothing sale,Or order so many supplements you pop more pills than Pete Doherty back in his hay day.And you certainly don’t need to eye up the mahogany wood stainer and a pair of...
How To Avoid Being a Fat Loss Wet Wipe In 2025
You've probably had enough of our moaning by now.Who could blame you?So this week we brought in 2 lads who know a thing or two about putting the excuses aside and getting in damn good shape.The boys who are calling out the ...
How Dad Life Has Changed Our Training!
There’s no winging it anymore 😂What were once peaceful mornings of lie ins, quiet coffee’s and going with the flow.Have become a battlefield for chaos, mess and a military precision plan of attacks for the week.We’re not...
Why building muscle is way harder than losing body fat
Call it controversial, call it truthful, call it whatever you want.But you see more people walking around lean than you do walking around with tonnes of muscle!Why?Because building muscle is way harder than losing body fat!...
Why the bar for coaching is so low...
Back when we got into coaching "business mentors" were not a thing.We would spend all of our spare time and money on our education and focusing on becoming a better coach.Crazy, right?The first 5 years for us as coaches wer...
Why we love aggressive fat loss!
Start easy,Have a “priming phase”Begin at maintenance,Take it steady,And make small gradual changes to the diet over time so you don’t scare them off.This is what we use to do thinking regardless of someone coming to use...
Great Coaches Are Great Clients!
"Jake how do I get my clients to check in on time?""Jake my clients don't stick to their targets?""Jake how I do get my clients to buy into the process?"Our response to these questions always be the same,Well, are...
How We Would Get Into Shape For Summer 2026
Its September 1st,The summer holidays are over,The BBQ's finished,The socials, beers & burgers all packed away for another year.And you're left looking down at the unwanted pounds,Wondering how ...